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Federal prosecutors last week filed charges against a Texas lib woman for threatening to freshen the tree of liberty with the blood of Judge Alieen Cannon and her client, disgraced former President Trump, after Cannon helped slow down the federal criminal investigation into Trump’s theft of classified documents from the White House in early 2021 following his humiliating 306 – 232 electoral college vote defeat to President Joe Biden, Reuters reports.

“Donald Trump has been disqualified long ago, and he’s marked for assassination. You’re helping him, ma’am,” said leftist Tiffani Shea Gish in a voicemail to Cannon, adding “I’m also Trump’s hitman, so consider it a bullet to your head from Donald Trump himself,” It’s not clear what Gish was charged with and information on the case overall is sparse. You would think right wing media would’ve been on this like white on one of their Caucasian fans since it happened last week.

Anyway, it’s clear Gish was just angry over a two-tier justice system, where regular people like her face consequences for their crimes while people like Trump use an unelected bureaucrat to run interference for them. Plus how do we know it was really a threat? What if Cannon left out a part where Gish said “with a Nerf gun, peacefully” from the voicemail? There’s technology where these things can be edited, you know. Cannon should have to prove she didn’t edit it. There must be a special master appointed to review the voicemails and decide whether they’re special civilian privileged. If it can happen to Tiffani Gish than it can happen to you too. It was free speech anyway. She’s protected under the First and Second Amendment to stand her ground against tyrants like Cannon and Trump. Cannon leaked these voicemails. It’s election interference.

We’re so blessed this weak little girl moved to Michigan! Looks like he’s bringing all his California Dreaming here with him. https://t.co/85MQNcN3f1

— meshawn maddock (@MeshawnMaddock) September 11, 2022

Meshawn Maddock, the co-chair of the Michigan Republican Party, doesn’t even try to hide her bigotry and homophobia in a tweet about Navy veteran and Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg, a gay man.  But sure, the GOP isn’t a group of hate-filled, angry fear mongers who project their own sexuality uncertainties.

With speculation swirling about why the glorious, Greatest President Ever is unexpectedly in the DC are on Monday, we’re happy to report that it’s popcorn time because THE STORM is about to begin! Yes! You read it first here people: President Trump is going to be reinstated to his rightful office as soon as John F Kennedy Jr shows up for the re-inauguration on the steps of the Capitol.

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump
Working today at @TrumpWashingtonDC on the Potomac River. What an incredible place! trumpnationaldc.com/

480 1,402 Sep 12, 2022, 11:30

President-reinstate Trump even posted this on Truth Social just moments ago, confirming what we already know to be true: He’s getting ready for it now. The military will arrest false President Joe Biden, illegitimate Vice President Kamala Harris, pedophile Chief Justice John Roberts, and others when JFK Jr’s helicopter lands on the National Mall. Together they will proclaim a Great Awakening, celebrated with televised mass executions featuring special guests Attorney General Sidney Powell, Secretary of War Michael Flynn, FBI Director Kash Patel, and Queen Romana of Canada wielding the chainsaws and M2 mounted machine guns to personally execute the condemned.

Tom Hanks, Oprah, Bill Gates, Hillary, and the rest of them will be turned into human applesauce by the end of the day! They’ll be arrested at the airport if they try to flee! So get ready folks, as soon as JFK Jr shows up the fun starts! He’ll be there any minute now. Just wait libtards!

The Republican Party of Lee County, Florida – a malarial swamp shithole you will not be surprised at all to learn is named after Confederate General Robert E Lee – will vote this week on a party platform containing a number of batshit extremist planks, FloridaPolitics reports.

First, they want to symbolically declare the World Health Organization and the World Economic Forum to be “terrorist organizations.” The WHO we guess is evil because Trump said they were and pulled the United States out of it in a tantrum over the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 because it was something to do to distract his fanboys. The WEF on the other hand we still don’t quite know if there’s any specific MAGA grievance or if it’s just something to do with Jews. Probably the latter.

Next, the Lee County GOP want DeSantis to ban electronic voting machines in Florida, and go back to hand counted paper ballots, apparently since the “dimple chad” shitshow in 2000 was preferable to knowing who won on election night in 2020 like two or three hours after the polls closed – and that it was Trump, no less. Last but not least in this lowlight reel is some more impotent rage about the FBI Mar-a-Lago as the Lee GOP want all federal agents banned from the county. Probably another “symbolic” resolution because trying to evict federal law enforcement from whatever offices they have in the region probably is not going to end well for them. But we guess it’s fun for them to fantasize publicly about winning such a confrontation even though they wouldn’t.

The quotation marks were a nice face-saving move. Read more from Trump’s lawyers’ filing opposing the request for a stay from the Department of Justice here.

Conservative Indonesians, many carrying banners bearing the Islamic declaration of faith, on Monday rallied in the streets of Jakarta to demand the government back down from a decision to increase fuel prices, the AP reports. It’s not clear if the protesters planned to put stickers of President Joko Widodo saying “I DID THAT!” pointing at the price display on gas pumps if the rallies don’t work. It’d also be interesting to see if whoever the Indonesian equivalent is of Jim Jordan will “joke” by asking on Twitter if Indonesians have to wear two masks while they’re pumping expensive gas. Conservative “humor” like that should translate globally, even though it sucks.

Rather than just continue to pretend the January 6th, 2021, MAGA insurrection never happened, if the win the majority House GOP are planning to investigate the US Capitol Police for getting the shit beaten out of them by an angry horde of Republican voters on that day, Politico reports.

“I think it’s been very well-documented that there were significant intelligence and communications failures on Jan. 6. It’s not the first time we’ve had those issues. We have to stop that,” said GOP South Dakota Congressman Kelly Armstrong, who might be correct objectively but it’s still not clear why the fuck he thinks it’s a good idea for House Republicans to suddenly start acting like it wasn’t a big deal and just a “normal tourist visit” or whatever it is in the official talking points now.

In the weeks following following his humiliating loss to Joe Biden in the 2020 election, disgraced former President Trump told his minions they were just not going to leave the White House, CNN reports on New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman’s upcoming book, Confidence Man.

“I’m just not going to leave,” Trump said, according to Haberman. “We’re never leaving. How can you leave when you won an election?” The book details this being a switch from the most immediate aftermath of the loss, in which Donald appeared to at first accept his defeat, saying “We did our best” and “I thought we had it,” but then declaring that if all options had been exhausted he would simply stay even as Biden moved in. “Why should I leave if they stole it from me?” Trump reportedly asked RNC Chair Ronna Not-Romney McDaniel in what must’ve been an entertaining exchange.

Now by the third paragraph we’re realizing this isn’t really anything new, that plenty of contemporaneous reporting – even the two days after the election, before it was called, had a Biden Campaign spokesman saying “the United States government is perfectly capable of escorting trespassers out of the White House.” Haberman needs some better, more outrageous shit than this coming out ahead of her book’s street date on October 4th if she wants people to drop $29 or whatever it’s going to cost for a hardcover copy.

Police in Walled Lake, Michigan shot and killed 53-year-old QAnon fan Igor Lanis in a brief shootout early Sunday morning after he murdered his wife, Tina, 56, with a handgun and shot his daughter, Rachel, 25, in the back and legs with a shotgun, the Detroit News reports.

Officials did not publicly identify the victims, however the Lanis’ other daughter, Rebecca, confirmed directly to the Detroit News her father had snapped and shot both her mother and sister, detailing how Igor had gone full QAnon in recent years. Rachel Lanis is in stable condition and expected to survive. As for her father, Rebecca said “I think that he was always prone to (mental issues), but it really brought him down when he was reading all those weird things on the internet,” adding that he’d really gone down the rabbit hole after Trump lost the 2020 election.

“It’s really so shocking but it really can happen to anybody. Right-wing extremism is not funny, and people need to watch their relatives and if they have guns, they need to hide them or report them or something because this is out of control,” said Rebecca, whose rhetoric is basically declaring war on the 74 million Americans who voted for President Trump in the last election (sarc).

Disgraced former President Trump made an unannounced landing at Dulles International Airport in Virginia on Sunday evening, showing up wearing white golf shoes as if he left in the middle of a game despite there being a forecast of rain on Monday, the Daily Beast reports, mentioning rampant speculation of the fat bastard being in town to answer to an indictment.

The governor of the northeastern Ukrainian region of Kharkiv claimed Monday that troops had, in parts of his territory, driven Russian troops completely over the border during the sweeping offensive that saw a total collapse of Putin’s forces in the area in the last few days, the AP reports.

“In some areas of the front, our defenders reached the state border with the Russian Federation,” wrote Kharkiv Governor Oleh Syniehubov. The claim could not be verified independently.

“… so they’re just flabbergasted by it.  But da, again, th-the press is so unbelievably powerful and the Left has infiltrated every institution of this country,” Russian hobbyist and guy who just happened to be the Senator the insurrectionists called Ron Johnson (Q-Wi.) calculates.  “They started with the college and university system so they control colleges of education and journalism and law, and they’ve infiltrated every agency, they’ve infiltrated religions, they’ve infiltrated everything and now we’re seeing the results of that.  That’s why our nation is literally on a precipice where at each point in history we have to win this election and we have to win many more because w-we got to y’know, p-push them out of these institutions and return some normalcy, return the values that made this country great.”

Far-right nationalist and religious groups took to the streets of Belgrade, Serbia to protest a planned Gay Pride parade scheduled for next weekend, Reuters reports, with chants supporting Russia and the invade of Ukraine mixed in with nationalist slogans.

During his sermon as part of a service held during the protest, the head of the Serbian Orthodox Church, Patriarch Porfirije, said the EuroPride event threatened traditional family values.  “They want to desecrate the sanctity of marriage and the family and impose an unnatural union as a substitute for marriage,” he told the crowd.

While homosexuality is not against the law in Serbia, the government had barred some Gay Pride parades before permitting this month’s.  LGBTQ advocates have been working to legalize gay marriage with little success.

After their towns were liberated from Russian occupiers, Ukrainian civilians told soldiers the Russians were dropping their rifles and running away in fear as the Ukrainian military fought to free captured territory, the Washington Post reports.

Just like the junior Republican Senator from Missouri who ran through the halls of Congress to escape a violent mob he encourage just hours before, fearful Russian soldiers are fleeing as their positions were being targeted.

A former pitcher who played parts of six seasons in the Major Leagues but who retired in 2016 to become a Port Authority Police officer died in a traffic accident Sunday morning driving to work the command center at a 9/11 memorial ceremony, ESPN reports.

A native of Staten Island, Anthony Varvaro, 37, was traveling into Manhattan from his home in New Jersey, and as he was near the entrance to the Holland Tunnel on the New Jersey Turnpike, a vehicle traveling in the wrong direction impacted his car head-on.

Varvaro played in the Majors from 2010 to 2016 for the Atlanta Braves, Seattle Mariners and Boston Red Sox.  After retiring in 2016, Varvaro started working as an officer for the Port Authority, eventually joining the World Trade Center Command.  He also taught classes at the Port Authority’s academy.

For the upcoming official funeral of Queen Elizabeth, so many people are expected to come to London foreign heads of state are being instructed by the British government that they will not be allowed to drive around town in their own state vehicles, so they will be bussed to Westminster Abbey, Politico reports.

The British Foreign Ministry started sending information to embassies Saturday night outlining the expectations, plans and protocols for the celebration of the Queen’s life.  Only heads of state and their spouses or partners will be allowed to attend the event; no one else will be allowed to be part of official state delegations because of the limited seating available in the church.

Leaders are being asked to fly on commercial flights into London, not take private planes because of the limited ground space to secure aircraft.  London’s Heathrow Airport will not be made available to foreign delegations for either landings or aircraft storage; other airports in the region may not be able to accommodate certain planes.

Three months ago gas prices were sky high, the highest they’ve even been, causing great hardship for patriots who drive large American SUVs and pickups and keep them running so the AC stays on while the truck’s parked diagonally across three handicapped spaces in front of Walmart. From Sheetz to Wawa to Circle K to Turkey Hill to Buc-ee’s to Kum and Go to Flying J to Cumberland Farms, thousands of filling stations across MAGAmerica were proudly sporting an “I DID THAT!” next to the sale amount display screen because Biden canceled the Keystone XL pipeline from Canada and did some other liberal green new deal shit that made gas prices a lot higher than they were when Trump’s policies and leadership made them extremely low in April 2020.

Now gas prices have been dropping for 89 days in a row! Like the above meme from some patriot on Truth Social implies, Biden and the democrats are doing something to make gas prices lower. We don’t know what it is, but it’s 100% politically motivated. It’s basically election interference, because Republicans have been campaigning on high gas prices. The lower costs go, the less motivated those stupid sheeple Independentard voters will be to show up and help the Red Wave swamp the Biden Regime! This is fucking serious people! The national average could be under $3 a gallon in November! Someone needs to do something immediately before it’s too late!

“We will take back what is rightfully ours which is the White House in 2024.”  Set aside the fact that the GOP lapdancer for the highest bidder holds a microphone like a chicken leg.  Forget that she ignores the function of said microphone and screams loud enough to wake the dead three counties over.  Trump campaign fundraising co-chair and Junior’s stepmother Oedipal complex Kimberly Guilfoyle tells a group gathering for something called “Freedom Fest” in Morningview, Kentucky asserts the White House is “rightfully ours,” even though Trump lost the popular vote, the Electoral College, scores of court cases and all remaining credibility.

Courtesy of a number of British laws, King Charles III will inherit his mother’s $750 million estate without having to pay one pound of taxes in a nation where citizens have to pay a 40% levy on inheritances over £325,000, Business Insider reports.

A 1993 law passed by Parliament give the royal family a pass on inheritance taxes to ensure that the royals would be able to maintain their wealth should two members of the family die in a short period of time.  Queen Elizabeth II dies last week, while her husband Prince Philip died 18 months ago.  In 2002, Elizabeth benefited from the rule by inheriting the Queen Mother’s $80 million estate after she died.

Charles will take over the Duchy of Lancaster, which generated about $27 million in income last year.  The duchy manages 18,000 hectares of land in England and Wales that have commercial, agricultural and residential properties.  Founded in the 13th century, a 1702 law prevents the royal family from selling any of the estate.

This week’s Otter Globe and Intelligencer post examines the what an end of the Putin regime could mean for the GOP’s coffers as shit goes from bad to worse on the battlefield for Russia.