Slush fund Turning Point USA on Wednesday sent a cease and desist to deranged podcaster Candace Owens, demanding that she stop making shit up about founder Charlie Kirk’s murder, the Bulwark’s Will Sommer reports on the obvious failure of Erika Kirk and Owens to reach an accord.

From a whistleblower report obtained by the Associated Press: “By memorandum dated May 12, 2025 (‘the May 12 Memo’), Acting ICE Director Todd Lyons authorizes ICE agents to forcibly enter into certain people’s homes without a judicial warrant, consent, or an emergency. b. Specifically, in the May 12 Memo, the Acting ICE Director authorized ICE Agents to rely on Form I-205 (which is not a judicial warrant) to enter the residence of an alien subject to a final order of deportation, without consent, including by ‘a necessary and reasonable amount of force.’ c. While addressed to ‘All ICE Personnel,’ in practice the May 12 Memo has not been formally distributed to all personnel.”

“Instead, the May 12 Memo has been provided to select DHS officials who are then directed to verbally brief the new policy for action. Those supervisors then show the Memo to some employees, like our clients, and direct them to read the Memo and return it to the supervisor.”

You are a sick and deranged individual. 

Greg Bovino, alongside our brave ICE and CBP officers, are risking their lives every day to protect the American people — and lunatics like YOU continue to incite violence against them. https://t.co/77cGEAU8Qc

— RNC Research (@RNCResearch) January 21, 2026

A New York state judge on Wednesday ordered a redraw of the state’s 11th District, a seat currently held by insufferable Staten Island Republican Congresswoman Nicole Malliotakis.

A press release from the Monroe County, Florida Sheriff’s Office reveals that at a few boats slipped past Pete Hegseth’s pew-pew patrols over the past few months – and yet one cartel crew still lost a few keys near the Keys due to more commonplace hazards. Then a local salt found some and…

“A 65 year-old Marathon, Florida, charter boat captain selling drugs reportedly found at sea was arrested on Jan 19, 2026, following a Sheriff’s Office-led investigation that led to the seizure of more than 20 kilograms of cocaine, a 38-foot vessel, and thousands of dollars in cash. Bradford Todd Picariello was charged with trafficking cocaine, selling cocaine, and possessing cocaine.”

“Sheriff’s Office Special Operations Detectives purchased a kilogram of cocaine from Picariello for $10,000 in cash on Jan 19, 2026, following an investigation assisted by High Intensity Drug Trafficking Area investigators, US Customs and Border Protection, US Border Patrol, US Drug and Enforcement Administration, and CBP Air and Marine Operations. Approximately 23 kilograms were seized altogether, along with $8,000 in cash, and a 38-foot vessel. A .40-caliber handgun was also seized. Picariello was taken to jail. The case is expected to be prosecuted federally,” the release says. And yes, Captain Bradford Todd is a registered Republican voter. You guessed it.

In mostly unrelated news, a Connecticut snow plow driver was arrested after he plowed his truck into a house in the town of Fairfield, later admitting to cops he put a blizzard up his nose.

“Turkey Hill brings the flavor and fun of soft-serve desserts out of the scoop shop and into your home freezer with a new line of nostalgia-inspired soft frozen desserts. Featuring classic fan favorite flavors like Vanilla and Chocolate and Vanilla Twist, these premium quality frozen desserts scoop easily right from the freezer for a perfectly smooth, creamy, soft-serve-like experience in every bite”

“Turkey Hill’s new Soft Dessert line launches with two flavors sure to please the most discerning palates: Vanilla Soft: Made using Turkey Hill’s fan-favorite vanilla flavor, this soft treat takes you back to hot summer days and unforgettable memories! Chocolate and Vanilla Twist Soft: Swirling Turkey Hill’s fan-favorite vanilla flavor with indulgent soft chocolate gives your tastebuds the best of both worlds!” says a press release from Turkey Hill, the leader in mediocre retail brand ice cream.

They have a convenience store chain too, right? Aren’t there Turkey Hills in Pennsylvania and upstate New York? Are the stores as innovative as the brand that markets “soft-serve-like” packaged ice cream that you still have to scoop out of the tub? Why didn’t they at least put it in some kind of oversized squeeze bottle? That could and probably would go a pretty long way toward replicating the experience instead of just selling it in the same package as their lame other flavors.

“Based upon a very productive meeting that I have had with the Secretary General of NATO, Mark Rutte, we have formed the framework of a future deal with respect to Greenland and, in fact, the entire Arctic Region. This solution, if consummated, will be a great one for the United States of America, and all NATO Nations. Based upon this understanding, I will not be imposing the Tariffs that were scheduled to go into effect on February 1st. Additional discussions are being held concerning The Golden Dome as it pertains to Greenland. Further information will be made available as discussions progress. Vice President JD Vance, Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Special Envoy Steve Witkoff, and various others, as needed, will be responsible for the negotiations – They will report directly to me,” posted convicted felon President Trump from Davos on Wednesday.

Probably better than 50/50 chance fat Donald adds US vs Denmark to the list of wars he “stopped.”

The crew of a rescue helicopter in southern Japan’s southern Kyushu region on Wednesday reported that they had sighted the tourist helicopter that was carrying a pilot and two passengers when it crashed into the volcanic crater of Mount Aso on Monday, but the squad opted against trying to land and check the wreck for survivors since the volcano’s really dangerous, the AP reports.

On top of the hazardous fumes from the volcano, the crew also faced strong winds which could take the helicopter down and require the men to be rescued before they succumbed to the elements.

But hey, they found the tour helicopter… And to stop being so obnoxious about it, it can be allowed that the crew saw no signs of life at the crash site, so it might be a little much to risk their asses only to find a wreck with three dead bodies inside. Had there been three people waving their arms screaming “HELP!” and the chopper still flew off then they would’ve needed a better reason.

Drunken asshole Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth’s Pentagon on Tuesday ordered a North Carolina Army military police brigade to ready for a Minneapolis deployment, MS Now reports.

“We have nothing to announce at this time, and any tip about this is pre-decisional,” a Pentagon spokesman told the outlet, not denying anything about sending active-duty troops to the city.

REPORTER: “Any comment on Don Lemon charging into the church in Minnesota?”

GAVIN NEWSOM: “What? Don Lemon? Into a church? I literally know nothing about it.”

Holy smokes… This is not a serious person.
pic.twitter.com/lP9Ul2zt20

— Benny Johnson (@bennyjohnson) January 21, 2026

In what ISIS says was a protest of “growing crimes by the Chinese government against Uighurs” in the Xinjiang region, the terrorist group on Monday sent a suicide bomber into a Kabul Chinese restaurant to blow himself up along with at least seven of the diners in the place the BBC reports. A Taliban official confirmed the attack, saying one Chinese national was killed along with six Afghans and of course the suicide bomber himself. So yeah, looks like ISIS really stuck it to Xi.

Remember the “Nebraska Walz’s for Trump” and their shitty punctuation? Not all Walzes in the corn-filled state are MAGA as another of the Minnesota governor’s distant relatives, Dem former state Senator Lynne Walz, will be running to challenge shitbag Republican Gov Jim Pillen in November, with an official campaign launch event starting shortly, the Nebraska Examiner reports.

The Supreme Court will on Wednesday hear convicted felon President Trump’s Solicitor General D John Sauer croak and wheeze his way through some convoluted bullshit about why the Orange God Emperor’s divine powers from God permit him to fire Fed Board of Governors member Lisa Cook because of some shit they made up about her mortgage without even trying to prosecute her first.

EU Parliament on Wednesday indefinitely froze approval of a major trade deal with the US before convicted felon President Trump was done with his abysmal speech in Davos, per Bloomberg.

New York federal Judge Paul Engelmayer, who presided over the Ghislaine Maxwell trial, on Wednesday told Congressmen Tom Massie and Ro Khanna his court was not the proper venue as Engelmayer lacks jurisdiction – and Khanna/Massey standing – to enforce the Epstein files act that doesn’t have any clean nexus to a criminal trial from four years ago. It’s not clear why the bipartisan duo had tried to go through Engelmayer’s court to get a special master appointed to surveil the Regime’s handling of the files and publicly report any of the fuckery that is definitely happening.

Engelmayer seemed to say that and that he was sorry he can’t help, writing “For the two reasons above, the Court respectfully denies the Representatives’ motion to participate in this criminal case as amici curiae. This criminal case does not give the Court any charter to supervise DOJ’s compliance with the EFTA. And the motion exceeds the bounds of permissible amici participation.”

“This decision is without prejudice to the Representatives’ right to initiate a separate lawsuit. The Representatives are also, of course, at liberty to pursue oversight of DOJ via the tools available to Congress,” Engelmayer continued. Would be nice if he just wrote the new complaint for them.

Holy fuck he sounds terrible. This is going to go just great.

Best to go in a straight line here so there’s no confusion about the timeline: Florida Capitol rioter Andrew Paul Johnson was not arrested on charges for crimes committed during the insurrection until October 2022, none violent though he did threaten Capitol police. He then in April 2024 pleaded guilty to four counts and in August of that year was sentenced to a year in the joint.

That federal prison bid, as you’re all-too aware, was cut short by Johnson’s Holy Orange Allah’s return to power and subsequent mass amnesty for Johnson and his ilk. It was during that pre-plea stretch in 2024 however, that Johnson sexually molested at least two minors, one of them a then-11 year-old boy. Following his release last year, Johnson contacted at least one of the victims to let him know about the pardon, and he was being awarded $10 million as a result of being a ‘Jan 6er'” and would “be putting (the victim) in his will to take any money left over,” according to a police affidavit.

Obviously that $10 million never materialized, never will, and even if the kid believed Johnson he obviously didn’t think a bequeathment upon the MAGA pederast’s death was soon enough to buy his silence, so yeah, here we are. CBS News reports Johnson goes on trial next month on faces charges of lewd and lascivious child molestation of a child under 12, lewd and lascivious child molestation of a child between 12 and 16, as well as lewd and lascivious exhibition, and transmission of material harmful to a minor. It’s not clear if prosecutors are seeking the death penalty, which is an option.

The point of laying out the timeline was to clarify that Johnson’s vile crimes were committed prior to his 2025 post-pardon release. He also would have been out of the federal lockup by now anyway had Trump not issued the general amnesty to his loyal fanatic insurrectionists. You can say 100 percent accurately say “Trump pardoned a child molester!” but to assign blame to fat Donald for kids being victimized by a sexual predator is simply incorrect… for now. In this specific case.

A new survey of Alaska voters commissioned by the Democratic Senate Campaign Committee finds Dem former Congresswoman Mary Peltola leading GOP Senator Dan Sullivan 49 to 47 percent.

Peltola also edges out Sullivan on favorability at +4 to Sullivan’s negative 5. Normally you can and probably should take a partisan poll by an actual arm of a party with a grain of salt. At the same time, if it were a shitty result they wouldn’t have leaked it. There’s also the other findings, like that convicted felon president Trump has a net +2 approval rating at 49 to 47 in the sample, who in 2024 voted for him 50 to 40 percent, a delta close to his 11 percent margin in the state that year. Peltola, on the same ballot, lost to Republican now-Congressman Nick Begich III by just 2 percent.