“Today, the Title IX Special Investigations Team (Title IX SIT), a joint initiative of the US Department of Education (ED) and the US Department of Justice (DOJ), launched a directed investigation into the Washington Office of the Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI). This investigation comes amid reports that OSPI has imposed requirements on school districts that potentially violate federal law, specifically, Title IX, the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA), and the Protection of Pupil Rights Amendment (PPRA). Multiple Washington State school districts have reported that OSPI is requiring school boards to adopt policies that allow males to participate in female sports and occupy female-only intimate facilities, thereby raising substantial Title IX concerns,” says a press release from a department run by a fake wrestling circus CEO.

Let’s just preface this article with the usual: This never would have happened if Kamala Harris was president. She’s a tough negotiator and she’d be able to make a deal with the two sides and make sure that there’s no war between two nuclear-armed powers. Trump’s weakness and fecklessness are why India and Pakistan are on the brink of a destructive conflict that endangers millions of lives.

ANYWAY, CBS News reports that Pakistan’s Information Minister Attaullah Tarar on Wednesday said officials have “credible intelligence that India intends carrying out military action against Pakistan in the next 24-36 hours on the pretext of concocted and baseless allegations of involvement in the Pahalgam incident,” referring to last week’s Islamist massacre in Kashmir which killed at least 26 tourists. The remarks came just hours after Indian dictator Narendra Modi said his nation’s troops have “complete operational freedom to decide on the mode, targets and timing of our response to the terror attack,” blamed on an offshoot of a Pakistani-backed terror group Lakshar-e-Taiba formed decades ago by their intel services to fuck with India’s control of the disputed region.

Again, this never would be happening if Kamala Harris was president. It’s beyond dispute.

“Republican Party headquarters has been defaced with Nazi imagery for the second time in two weeks. This hateful vandalism invites political violence and threatens the wellbeing of our employees and guests. We appreciate Governor Hochul’s condemnation of the initial act of vandalism. Chuck Schumer, with his constant demagoguery and past calls to political violence and AOC, with her present ‘Fight the Oligarchy’ tour, are fueling a climate of hostility that emboldens such hateful actors. They must immediately call on their supporters to reject political violence and restore civility to our discourse. Our heartfelt thanks go out to the Albany Police Department and Albany County District Attorney’s office, both of whom are giving this matter its due consideration. We look forward to the perpetrators being prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law,” says New York GOP chair Ed Cox in a statement after some lib wrote “NAZIS” on the outside of their building.

“The vile and hateful defacement of the New York Republican Party Headquarters with Nazi imagery for the second time in just two weeks is a disgusting criminal act and a direct threat to the hardworking staff of the New York Republican Party. This was not a random act of vandalism—it was an escalation of political hatred deliberately aimed at intimidating Republicans and silencing our voices. I stand in full solidarity with the NYGOP and all those who reject political violence. We must ensure the perpetrator of this heinous crime is swiftly identified and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I am grateful to the Albany Police Department and the Albany County District Attorney’s office for treating this matter with the seriousness it demands. We must never tolerate political violence, regardless of the target. It’s time to restore respect, dialogue, and decency to our political discourse,” Malevolent razorback Elise Stefanik added in the statement.

Reminder: All this shit the fat bastard claims is “investment” is just vague, non-committal plans to spend money on this or that project that’ll take years. There’s nothing actually happening yet.

Realizing that there might not be enough space in El Salvador’s CECOT gulag for the undocumented migrants they want imprisoned in a foreign hellhole, Trump Administration officials are floating plans to have them sent to prisons in other failed states Libya and Rwanda, CNN reports, writing that Libya specifically is being eyed as a place to send asylum seekers approaching the southern border.

“7-Eleven, Inc is turning the flavor dial to 11 once again by teaming up with Green Day and Punk Bunny to unveil an all-new, exclusive Slurpee® drink flavor: Kerplunk Kandy Grape. As an ode to the band’s 1992 album ‘Kerplunk!’, this rockin’ new flavor mashes up cotton candy sweetness with juicy grape vibes. The Kerplunk Kandy Grape Slurpee drink is a sweet and slightly twisted treat that tastes just like the cotton candy grapes Green Day keeps as a staple on their backstage riders. Born from the band’s personal snack pile and reborn in frozen form, this isn’t your average frozen treat – it’s a full-on flavor riot. The new flavor is available now for a limited time at participating 7-Eleven®, Speedway® and Stripes® stores nationwide,” says a 7-Eleven press release.

“The drinks don’t stop there – after the exclusive debut of Punk Bunny Coffee at 7-Eleven in 2024, anticipation has been building for the next drop. 7-Eleven and Green Day are rolling out three new exclusive Punk Bunny coffee varieties at participating stores: Mike Dirnt’s Turn Up the Bass Medium Roast, Punk Bunny Cold Brew Caramel Latte and Chocolate Almond Specialty Latte,” the fan service to Gen Xers who were fed up with those stuffy suits and their marketing campaigns continued.

Still running this live earlier in the homepage feed but this moment is worth picking out as it is more or less EXACTLY what one random MAGA asshole posted on Fox News all the way back in November, that kids should learn to live with less stuff because he’s going to raise prices.

Legendary Denver Broncos QB John Elway killed his longtime agent turned business partner with a golf cart in California on Saturday, TMZ reports. Jeff Sperbeck, 61, is not dead yet but is being prepped for organ harvesting after falling off the vehicle allegedly being driven by Elway, 64, in La Quinta, California on Saturday. The two founded a winery after Elway’s retirement and… yeah…

Bad enough the guy’s braindead. Worse would be if Elway were drunk on their wine.

On this day in history 80 years ago the original inspiration behind the MAGA movement shot himself dead in a bunker underneath Berlin as Soviet troops stormed into the city, the capital to a nation utterly devastated after six years of a war that Adolf Hitler himself had started.

Hitler’s self-inflicted end was no comfort to the few who had opposed his rule, they had suffered just as badly at the hands of the Allies and the Russians as those who did. Keep that in mind if and when you’re ever tempted to embrace the blackpill of enjoying the ruin Trump has wrought.

A Homer, Alaska-area dog is lucky to be alive after nearly getting hit by a Cessna 207 coming in for a landing at the Nanwalek airstrip Monday afternoon, the pooch avoiding a gruesome fate after the single-engine plane’s pilot pulled up at the last second, KTUU reports citing NTSB officials.

“What we understand now is that there may have been an animal, namely a dog, that was on the runway. The pilot initiated a go-around. There was also another company airplane behind – he was talking to that airplane at the same time – said he was initiating the go-around, made a right turn away from the runway, pretty steep climb, and unfortunately, there was a loss of control,” NTSB state chief Clint Johnson told reporters, not mentioning any detail about the dog like if it was a mischievous little Lab puppy with an adorable wet nose named Dodger or Zowie or Corduroy.

“We don’t want to draw any conclusions at this point,” Johnson added, again not describing the dog’s color and what kind of chew toys he or she likes to play with. “We still are in the very formative stages. We are going to be looking very closely at that airplane. We are in the recovery process right now to get that airplane back to Homer and probably eventually back to Anchorage here where we are going to lay it out and make sure there are no mechanical issues that led to this loss of control.”

“Rescuers were able to pull that wreckage up a little bit further away from the water, but nevertheless it is in the tide zone,” Johnson, who is obviously a cat person, said about the plane and the dead people and the one guy who survived with horrible injuries and blah blah blah and not about the canine who made a mistake but is still a good doggie and deserves a treat.

On a recent Navigator Research survey’s question of “You indicated you voted for Donald Trump in 2024. Do you regret voting for Donald Trump? [If do not regret voting for Trump] Would you say you are disappointed or not disappointed in how Donald Trump has handled his first few months of being president?” 11 percent said yes, they regret voting for Trump and another 16 percent say they’re disappointed. It’s not clear how many in the 1,000-respondent sample said they actually voted for the fat fuck, so it’s hard to estimate how representative 11 percent could be.

A federal judge on Wednesday denied convicted felon President Trump’s DOJ’s bid to pause further discovery in the case of Kilmar Abrego Garcia, JustSecurity’s Adam Klasfeld reports.

Not the greatest timing for Team Orange on that as the stay is still set to expire this afternoon, a day after ABC News aired the interview in which the fat fuck said he could get Abrego Garcia out of the CECOT dungeon in El Salvador if he wanted to. The Supreme Court ordered him to do it.

Verbatim from Deputy White House Press Secretary Anna Kelly: “If you break it down, there is an outsized influence in January in that report. This president wasn’t elected until January 20.” Yeah, she literally said “elected,” not “inaugurated.” That was the least untrue thing she said.

“This is Biden’s Stock Market, not Trump’s. I didn’t take over until January 20th. Tariffs will soon start kicking in, and companies are starting to move into the USA in record numbers. Our Country will boom, but we have to get rid of the Biden ‘Overhang.’ This will take a while, has NOTHING TO DO WITH TARIFFS, only that he left us with bad numbers, but when the boom begins, it will be like no other. BE PATIENT!!!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday.

Not even sure where to start with this. It’s almost perfect, really. How can one truly ever top this self-satire when the line all last year was that Trump actually owned the stock market because investors were pricing in his comeback? Or that an impulsive man-boy is now counseling patience? Never mind that the Dow Jones is down 3,329.38 since January 20th. Just revel in the glory of this.

“Real gross domestic product (GDP) decreased at an annual rate of 0.3 percent in the first quarter of 2025 (January, February, and March), according to the advance estimate released by the US Bureau of Economic Analysis. In the fourth quarter of 2024, real GDP increased 2.4 percent. The decrease in real GDP in the first quarter primarily reflected an increase in imports, which are a subtraction in the calculation of GDP, and a decrease in government spending. These movements were partly offset by increases in investment, consumer spending, and exports,” says the Bureau of Economic Analysis in the quarterly GDP update. Love the sugarcoating with the “decrease in government spending.”

Fed up with the pollution caused by frozen corpses on the world’s tallest mountain, Nepal’s lawmakers are working on a new bill to reduce the rate at which they’re piling up by requiring the would-be corpses to either expire on other peaks in the country or just not expire there at all, CNN reports in not so harsh terms about the corpse situation in the nightmarish void.

The way they see it, mandating that climbers first ascend one of the many other 22,965+ ft peaks in the country before being eligible for a permit to climb Everest is a sensible solution to the corpse problem, even if it’ll cause obvious issues in an economy dependent on such corpse production.

Former Vice President Kamala Harris will on Wednesday mark convicted felon President Trump’s 100 days of his second failed term in office with a speech in San Francisco, the AP reports while hyping it as “her most extensive public remarks since leaving office in January following her defeat to Trump, with planned critiques of the Republican president’s handling of the economy, US institutions and foreign policy,” as she nears an expected decision on whether to run for governor of California in 2026 like Richard Nixon after losing or for president again in 2028 like Richard Nixon did after losing.

There’s an extremely thin veneer of ambiguity here as the speech is an address to the 20th anniversary gala for Emerge America, an organization that recruits Democratic women to run for office – which the AP writes was an outgrowth of Harris’s first successful campaign for San Francisco District Attorney – rather than one put on by any part of her political organization.

Still it’s a big deal and, as has been noted here repeatedly, if Harris is for real about 2028 she would do very well to replicate the Orange God Emperor’s four years in the wilderness with incessant backseat driving and heckling the fuck out of the fat bastard. Grace period’s over.

In case you wonder what we — and President Trump — are up against.

100% NEGATIVE coverage from so-call “mainstream” press in the first 100 days. PERFECT SCORE.

(Come on @RobertKennedyJr & @elonmusk , you guys can do better!) pic.twitter.com/uYi2ebI0RG

— Pete Hegseth (@PeteHegseth) April 30, 2025