Convicted felon President Trump on Friday acknowledged that his Agriculture Secretary better figure out the egg thing fast, because they might have to start taking responsibility for that, but that there will be other things he and Republicans can blame other people for.

The above is not a verbatim quote but it’s pretty close to what the fat fuck actually said.

Neckbeard-y, incel-ish Florida MAGA Congressman Cory Mills is under DC Metro Police investigation for an assault that occurred at a residence somewhere in the vicinity of the White House on Wednesday afternoon, sources tell NOTUS. No further details were available though cops did confirm the investigation. “Once MPD leadership became aware of this matter there was an immediate review of our initial response to ensure all procedures were followed. MPD’s Internal Affairs Bureau is currently investigating this matter,” they said in a statement.

Mills is scheduled to speak at CPAC and is apparently still on the schedule. In related-ish news, French far right leader Jordan Bardella is not. He canceled his speech after twice-convicted felon white nationalist alcoholic Steve Bannon threw a Hitler salute on Thursday night.

It appears that Texas MAGA Congressman Ronny “Dr Feelgood” Jackson is a subscriber to Paramount+, the streaming service jam-packed with hit exclusive series like Yellowstone, its prequels 1883 and 1923, NCIS, NCIS: Hawaii, NCIS: Australia (awesome choices for a Navy man like Jackson), FBI, FBI: International, the all-new pulse-pounding original streaming-only movie Star Trek: Section 31, starring Michelle Yeoh, action-comedy Sonic The Hedgehog, as well as family hits like PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie, Boss Baby: Family Business (Alec Baldwin as the voice of a baby! What a hoot!), and Henry Danger: The Movie, based on the hit Nickelodeon series, to name just a few options the bottomless value that Paramount+ provides to TV watchers.

Like most people, Jackson definitely didn’t read the fine print on the Paramount+ terms of service when he signed up. After all, who really cares about a bunch of boring jargon like, for example, the part specifying users are bound to arbitration if they file a lawsuit against Paramount or any of its subsidiaries. But who can blame them? It’s a subscription that costs $12.99 a month, not a mortgage or a car loan or an insurance policy or anything actually impactful on one’s life and finances. The clause is there simply in case some Trekkie sues for $1.26 billion because he thinks Section 31 stole its script from some fan fiction he wrote and Paramount screws up and forgets to send a lawyer to the hearing ending in a default judgment. Don’t laugh, that happened to Pepsi.

Eternal enemies by their very nature, Florida man and alligator-kind are locked in a ceaseless cycle of violence destines to continue for as long as Florida still exists. So it could be like 75 more years. Nevertheless there was the briefest of amities on Wednesday when a Florida man took pity on one of the reptiles, an act of kindness that still could have cost the man a limb or two.

“I saw on our local Facebook page here for Ave Maria that someone had made a post about the alligator with the football stuck in his mouth. So I came over here, and I thought, perhaps I might have a little plan. If I could get close enough to it, I might be able to pop the football with a knife, deflate it so the gator could then just spit it out. Move on,” Collier County man Rick Green told WSVN of the possibly alcohol-related confrontation. “But I tried to get close to him, and he just wouldn’t let me anywhere close to him. So I told the wife about the plan, and she hated it.”

It’s not entirely clear from the article what actually happened next, but one way or another Green left with the football, still inflated and, more importantly, both hands and all fingers. The alligator swam off, its jaws free again unencumbered from chomping down on the limbs of another Floridian.

“Democrats, run by broken down losers like James Carville, whose weak of mind and body, are going crazy, and just don’t know what to do. They have lost their confidence and spirit – They have lost their minds! We are going to have big WINS for our Country, and MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN. It’s already happening, and will get bigger and better than ever before!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Friday and you’d be like “Whoa, James Carville must’ve been suicidal during a TV hit for Trump to react like that. Had to be awful,” if all you saw was this post.

Carville on Thursday told Sean Hannity that “more deficit has accumulated under Donald Trump than any other president in American history. But I’m glad that you’re on the fiscal responsibility bandwagon. I’m glad you’re on the bandwagon of Bill Clinton being able to balance the budget and bring unbelievable prosperity to America.” So that probably pissed Donald off.

CNN should really clean up after themselves… https://t.co/uOkrpkhEvE

— Pete Hegseth (@PeteHegseth) February 21, 2025

Wow, looks like CNN’s execs are already seeing the return on their attempts to curry favor with the Trump Administration by forcing now-former White House correspondent Jim Acosta out the door by shifting him to a 1:00 AM time slot or whatever it was that precipitated him quitting. And they got some public acknowledgement from top officials for being willing to play ball to maintain access.

That David Zaslav definitely has some secret sauce in him. He should think about running for office.

Respectful enough of his fellow passengers to avoid exposing his buttocks, genitals, and bare torso, a conscientious and courteous Amtrak traveller kept his briefs and undershirt on after stripping off the rest of his clothes in front of crew members during a drunken 8:00 AM EST Thursday incident on a northbound train in North Carolina, the Miami Herald reports.

“Deputies responded to an Amtrak passenger train, which was stationary … due to an intoxicated passenger on the train causing a disturbance,” the Rockingham County, North Carolina sheriff’s office said in a statement. “(The passenger) was extremely intoxicated and had removed all of his clothing, with the exception of his undershirt and underwear. (He) refused to cooperate with train officials’ requests to put his clothing back on, gather his belongings and disembark the train.”

Deputies arrested the man and charged him with being intoxicated and disruptive, a misdemeanor violation. “No one was injured during the disturbance on the train and the train resumed its travel after (he) was removed,” cops said. The Herald notes Rockingham is 490 miles away from the unidentified man’s hometown in New Jersey. It’s not clear if he has enough money for that Uber ride.

Despite years of complete shutouts in local elections in the former British colony, Hong Kong’s Democratic Party is no longer in disarray, as its leaders on Tuesday announced a bold new initiative to end the malaise and once and for all put the losing streak behind them, the BBC reports.

The party will cease all operations and dissolve, ending the disarray once and for all.

“Developing democracy in Hong Kong is always difficult, and it’s especially difficult in the past few years,” Dem chairman Lo Kin-hei told reporters at a late night presser following a party meeting where the decision was made to throw in the towel after concluding that the ChiComs’ draconian 2021 “patriots law,” which barred all of the Dems’ candidates from running in legislative elections, had made the political party pointless. “I am not surprised at all that they have been losing supporters in recent years… the Democratic Party has already reached a dead end,” said pro-commie Hong Kong official Regina Ip, spiking the ball on the Demonrat libtard losers.

New Mexico reports Texas measles outbreak has now crossed it's border https://t.co/8NjXwJFuoy

— Fox News (@FoxNews) February 21, 2025

Now-former IRS employee Robert McCabe, tells NBC10 Philadelphia that he did not think there would be any actual consequences for his actions until approximately 9:00 AM EST on Thursday, when he went into work and was unable to log in on his computer. It wasn’t until 11:30 AM that he found out he was one of the tens of thousands now without a job in the name of “efficiency.”

“McCabe said he had been a supporter of President Trump prior to the layoff,” NBC10 writes.

“You know when he talks about government waste and all that, yes, I’m behind it. I believe there is a lot of stuff in the government that needs fixing. And that’s part of the reason why I actually wanted to work for the government, actually. To help change. Help change the things that are wrong in the world, you know? I thought that someone with his business acumen would have come in with a fine-tooth comb and actually found it instead of coming in with a wrecking ball and destroying people’s lives for no reason,” McCabe told the station as he worked his way through the bargaining stage.

Despite an inspiring pep talk from convicted felon President Trump, Team USA was defeated 3 to 2 against the orange overlord’s mortal enemy, Canada, in the Four Nations Face-Off final on Thursday.

It’s not clear what Trump’s excuse will be for the stinging loss – one suffered on American soil, no less, although it’s possible he will call the American players losers and disown them.

Congressman Rich “Dollar Store Eric Roberts” McCormick found out that the bullshit canned talking points about social safety net cuts and forcing kids to work for school lunches that didn’t work on CNN a few weeks ago works even less with his own constituents who were pretty fucking pissed.

The people that were not eating the dogs, eating the cats, eating the pets yet a bunch of incest porn addicts believed it anyway and voted accordingly are going to be going through some things as Politico reports hussy DHS Secretary Kristi Noem has ordered a rescission of protected status for hundreds of thousands of Haitians already in the US, overruling a Biden-era extension to 2026.

Again, this is just to pad the numbers of “deportations,” not actually any valid reason.

A group of Venezuelans living in the US under temporary protected status on Wednesday filed a lawsuit against the MAGA Reich for rescinding their status, arguing that dog murderer Kristi Noem lacked legal authority to vacate former President Joe Biden’s granting an 18 month extension of temporary protections for Venezuelans or – failing that – even if Noem did when she cruelly fucked these people over on February 3rd she did not follow proper legal procedure, Reuters reports.

The roughly 348,000 Venezuelans whose status Noem pulled represent about half of the people from the dysfunctional socialist failed state to have been granted parole, all under Biden. The lawsuit cites statements by Noem, Trump, and other minions who the plaintiffs said had incorrectly claimed the Venezuelans are here illegally, and Noem referring to them as “dirtbags” on Fox News.

It’s not clear when it will be revealed that racism, cruelty, pandering to the MAGA base, and so on were motivating ideological factors for the rescission while the main, politically functional one was simply so they could say “We deported 348,000 illegal Venezuelans” as if ICE had raided hundreds of thousands of homes and arrested them one-by-one. But that’s definitely a when, not an if.

The Indiana state House’s GOP majority on Thursday passed Speaker Todd Huston’s bill to create a special commission to study the feasibility of having 33 MAGA hillbilly racist fentanyl-addicted rural shithole Illinois counties become 33 MAGA hillbilly racist fentanyl-addicted rural shithole Indiana counties, the Indianapolis Star reports. “We’ve really created a fantastic place, and we should take every advantage to make sure people are aware of that,” Huston said. “So we have this opportunity to raise our hand and say, ‘Hey, if you’re disenfranchised, we’d love to welcome you or have a conversation about what we do, because we think we have something really good offer.'”

Locally a number of these counties had passed secession referenda on the November ballot, giving Huston more political cover than a certain other Republican politician does with certain other territories like Canada, Greenland, Panama, and Gaza. But that’s still a pretty goddamned tall order considering that Illinois would have to approve it any border changes and then so would the US Congress. And good fucking luck with that, as it is extremely difficult to imagine that they would want to set any precedent that amounts to effectively gerrymandering state borders when some hicks don’t want to live in a Blue State. Rent a fucking U-Haul if you don’t like your state’s politics.

The following is a non-exhaustive scorecard for where the United States is at on February 20, 2025, starting with the stats for which we have data on with a definite change:

Not so great again, eh fanboys?

As expected, scumbag former Senate GOP Leader Mitch McConnell will not be seeking reelection in 2026, the AP reports. Whether he lives long enough to actually retire is an open question.

A new Washington Post/Ipsos national survey finds 43 percent of respondents saying they approve of convicted felon President Trump’s first month in office to 48 percent opposed to his regime.