Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton has defeated “RINO” incumbent Senator John Cornhole Cornyn in the state’s primary runoff, National Zero projects based on current returns showing Pax with a massive lead. Cornyn becomes the second incumbent to be removed by a MAGA challenger from the right this month and it is an ESPECIALLY wide margin for Pax.

FBI Director K$H Patel is really getting shit done at the bureau all day every day. On this day MS Now reports the shit he got done was firing Emily Morales, a senior intelligence analyst who in 2017 determined that the unhinged lib who almost fatally shot now-House Majority Leader Steve Scalise was not a domestic terrorist under the accepted law enforcement definition of the term.

At the time. In 2021 the FBI provided a statement to the House Appropriations Committee saying that “The shooter was motivated by a desire to commit an attack on Members of Congress… This conduct is something that we would today characterize as a domestic terrorism event.”

At least 10 workers have been injured and an unknown number are dead following the implosion of a chemical tank at the Nippon Dynawave paper mill in Longview, Washington on Tuesday, the AP reports on a horrible industrial accident that inflicted awful burns and inhalation injuries on victims.

Exactly what occurred is still unclear other than to say that a tank full of a highly corrosive mixture of mainly sodium hydroxide and sodium sulfide imploded and ruptured which, holy shit, it sounds like maybe if they had been killed in a natural gas explosion it would’ve been more merciful. Good God.

A National Zero reader has no fewer than three close family members who work at the facility either full or part time posted that their loved ones escaped injury through luck or circumstance.

“Secretary of State Shenna Bellows issued a final decision regarding challenges filed against the petitions filed by proponents of the citizen initiative titled ‘An Act to Designate School Sports Participation and Facilities by Sex’ and remanded to the Secretary of State office for further review.”

“The hearing to consider new evidence was held on May 12 and 13, 2026. Secretary Bellows accepted the recommendation of her staff, which found that on the 8,067 petition forms filed with the Secretary of State, 67,150 signatures are valid, and 12,542 signatures are invalid. Because the number of signatures required to determine the petition to be valid is 67,682, the petition was found to be invalid. While some arguments by the petitioners were rejected for insufficient evidence, and those challenged signatures were permitted, other signatures were invalidated based on evidence presented during the hearing and follow-up investigation. Following an additional review of challenged petitions and signatures, the Secretary of State’s office found signatures to be invalid due to circulators failing to witness registered voters signing petition forms and other signatures rejected as signed by another. The decision is final, pending appeal which must occur within ten days of the determination. Because of the possibility of appeal, the Office of Secretary of State will announce the final wording of the question should it appear on the ballot in November on Thursday, as required by Maine Statute,” said the Maine Secretary of State’s office on Tuesday.

Well that sure sucks for Susan Collins if Republicans can’t get this back on the ballot.

Wanted to run Jaydee’s ridiculous “fraud roundtable,” but lol, the feed cut out:

A London, Ontario physician with an overly casual way of handling patient requests for euthanasia has agreed to a six month supervision of his license after two incidents, the first of which was how he met with one patient in a Tim Horton’s parking lot to make the assessment before driving the man to a nearby mortuary processing facility to be, uh, processed, and the other a turn-around house call after an improper dose to a man suffering from terminal cancer, the National Post reports.

In the Tim Horton’s call, Dr James MacLean had in January 2024 been texting with 45 year-old Thomas Dillon, who suffered from Crohn’s disease so badly it left him unable to work which in turn led to mental and drug/alcohol abuse issues. Sick of constantly depending on family, Dillon turned to MacLean to approve him for “MAID” – medical assistance in death – as it’s known up in Maple Land, and after the quick consultation in a Tim Hortons parking lot, Dillon was greenlit and the only question was where to do it. Since MacLean isn’t so unprofessional to actually euthanize a guy in a donut place parking lot – only the decision to allow him to be euthanized happened there – they had weighed certain options. Dillon’s parents’ home was out of the question as they opposed their son killing himself so instead they decided on what was described as an “industrial” mortuary nearby.

It’s not clear if MacLean actually ended up administering the lethal injections to Dillon at the facility but the article’s text seems to suggest someone else handled that part. The setting of the final assessment for MAID eligibility and that it was only one visit – as well as the boundary-crossing nature of MacLean personally driving Dillon to the mortuary – were the ethical breaches found in the case by the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario (CPSO)’s MAID conduct review board.

“Just finished my 6 month physical at Walter Reed Military Medical Center. Everything checked out PERFECTLY. Thank you to the great Doctors and Staff! Heading back to the White House,” posted the Supreme Leader on Tuesday, his words so infallible that it is treasonous to so much as raise a mere scintilla of a query as to what diagnostic criteria were used to form his summation.

Seriously, this is what the fanboys are going to point to when some lib asks why the fat fuck keeps falling asleep during the daytime and why his hands have more cosmetic shit slathered on than the rest of his body. “Trump’s health is perfect, he said it himself on Truth Social. See? Read it and weep, you Marxist pussy. Obama was never anywhere near that healthy,” they’ll say in the replies.

His attention already elsewhere Trump then hyped the newest Fox News 2026 midterm “message theme” beta test by posting “Teen takeover in Chicago. Five officers badly hurt. Mayor and Governor are terrible. Should call for help!” without any actual link or even a video of the “takeover.” It’s no “caravans” but the “teen takeover” subplot does have some interesting qualities, specifically in how they collapse “Black and brown” into just “teens” and unsubtly imply that it’s a symptom of failed Democratic governance so it’s why you need to vote Republican in the midterms. Plus nobody on Fox News is ever going to actually say “Well if it’s such a fucking problem then why is Trump passively demanding that the mayor ask him for help when he could simply order thousands of National Guard troops to deploy to the city to impose ‘law and order’ on these rowdy kids?”

Can’t let anything get in the way of a rural Alaskan thinking “Well I was going to cast a ballot for Mary Peltola but then I saw footage of some kid in a Honda doing donuts in a downtown Chicago intersection on Fox News, so now I’m voting for Dan Sullivan to put an end to this chaos!”

Republican Pennsylvania Senator Dave McCormick was a little too honest for a split second during his Fox News bit on Tuesday, correctly calling convicted felon President Trump’s executive branch a “regime” before falling back on the more conventional term “administration” and continuing touting the company line about how this is all necessary suffering and blah blah blah. All of it raising the question of why the hell this jerkoff keeps spewing this shit when he’s not facing voters again until 2030, after the Orange Allah will hopefully be dead and thus unable to endorse some MAGA primary challenger to take McCormick down. Grow some balls and start being honest with people, Dave.

A federal judge in Virginia on Tuesday granted former FBI Director James Comey’s motion to move his July trial over the pitifully fucking stupid “8647” seashells “threat” to October 21st, All Rise’s Adam Klasfeld reports, adding that the longer timeline was specifically requested so that Comey can file motions to dismiss the indictment. Probably not a good sign for the “case” against Jim.

A three-judge panel in the Northern District of Alabama on Tuesday blocked the poorly-educated state from running its 2026 primaries under the 2023 gerrymander that removed one of the two majority-minority Congressional districts currently held by Black Democrats. It’s not clear whether the state will be able to get the US Supreme Court to lift the block before the August special primaries set in a convoluted scam meant to capitalize on the Callais decision.

In another statement on just how fucking stupid everything is these days, Semafor reports that a joint venture between Utah-based Vector Defense and Saudi-based startup SR2 Defense Systems seeks to build Skywasp™ (yes, the brand is already trademarked) attack drones modeled on Iran’s cheaply mass-produced Shaheds that wreaked havoc all over the Middle East after Trump’s attack.

“SKYWASP is a program that can level the playing field and boost Saudi Arabia’s deterrence capabilities,” said Vector co-founder Lucien Zeigler, who declined to provide a timeline on how fast the US and Saudi Arabia can start pumping out a clone of what’s said to be the most efficient and effective weapon in Tehran’s arsenal after pissing away untold billions of advanced munitions knocking some of them down. Key word being “some,” all of this made that much more ridiculous by the fact that four years of war in Ukraine might have provided some important insights into how warfare is waged with such weaponry on, specifically how Shaheds themselves fit into the equation.

A Nebraska woman suffered a minor wound from a shotgun pellet on Saturday when a dog recklessly discharged the weapon from inside of a camper truck parked in a nearby convenience store parking lot, KNOP reports. The dog’s owner had parked in front of the Short Stop on Avenue I in Scottsbluff at approximately noon and was standing outside the passenger door when the dog stepped on the loaded shotgun, blasting a hole in the side of the camper and striking a woman who was sitting in a vehicle waiting for the traffic light at the adjacent intersection of Ave I and 20th.

While further details on the woman’s injury were scant, cops initially believed they were responding to a BB gun wound based on the woman’s 911 call, so that should tell you she probably was not seriously hurt. It’s not clear what happened to the dog or its owner after the shooting.

A US CENTCOM spokesman tells Fox News’s Jennifer Griffin on Monday that “US forces conducted self-defense strikes in southern Iran today to protect our troops from threats posed by Iranian forces. Targets included missile launch sites and Iranian boats attempting to emplace mines. US Central Command continues to defend our forces while using restraint during the ongoing ceasefire”

Apparently the word “ceasefire” has ceased meaning what everyone thinks it does.

“The Enriched Uranium (Nuclear Dust!) will either be immediately turned over to the United States to be brought home and destroyed or, preferably, in conjunction and coordination with the Islamic Republic of Iran, destroyed in place or, at another acceptable location, with the Atomic Energy Commission, or its equivalent, being witness to this process and event,” posted demented grandpa on Monday after a weekend of various unfalsifiable claims about how he’ll unfuck this.

Convicted felon President Trump will this week undergo the fourth medical exam of his second already failed term, doing in under 17 months what Barack Obama and George W Bush did once a year during their terms, USA Today reports on the steadily worsening health of the old shitbag.

Trump repeatedly fell asleep on stage during the Monday ceremony at Arlington Cemetery.

James Talarico says he is "worried" about the election being rigged this fall and calls voting a "sacred, God-given right"

"Texas is one of the hardest places to vote in the country." pic.twitter.com/6I7p5IflUs

— Breitbart News (@BreitbartNews) May 25, 2026

“One of the worst deals ever made by our Country was the Iran Nuclear Deal, put forth and signed into existence by Barack Hussein Obama and the rank amateurs of the Obama Administration. It was a direct path to Iran developing a Nuclear Weapon. Not so with the transaction currently being negotiated with Iran by the Trump Administration – THE EXACT OPPOSITE, in fact! The negotiations are proceeding in an orderly and constructive manner, and I have informed my representatives not to rush into a deal in that time is on our side. The Blockade will remain in full force and effect until an agreement is reached, certified, and signed. Both sides must take their time and get it right.”

“There can be no mistakes! Our relationship with Iran is becoming a much more professional and productive one. They must understand, however, that they cannot develop or procure a Nuclear Weapon or Bomb. I would like to thank, thus far, all of the countries of the Middle East for their support and cooperation, which will be further enhanced and strengthened by their joining the Nations of the historic Abraham Accords and, who knows, perhaps the Islamic Republic of Iran would like to join, as well!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Sunday.

Israeli dictator Benjamin Netanyahu on Saturday told convicted felon President Trump that Israel remains free to do whatever they want in Lebanon irrespective of Trump’s surrender to Iran, whose scope does not include the IDF vs Hezbollah, Reuters reports, citing multiple sources.

“In last night’s conversation with President ‌Trump, the Prime Minister ⁠emphasized that Israel will maintain freedom of action against threats in all arenas, including Lebanon, and President Trump reiterated and supported ⁠this principle,” an Israeli source said, sounding almost like a press release.

Technically it’s Mission: Impossible but two colons in the same sentence would look stupid in the headline. This movie’s a goddamned classic that holds up well because Jon Voight really is a fucking traitor who sold out to the greediest and most sinister of anti-American forces.