Now-former Tanzanian Information Minister Nape Nnauye said he was just kidding when he told an MP candidate from his ruling CCM party that “election results are not necessarily those in the [ballot box], rather they depend on the person counting and making announcements” and “because I’m good at election tricks, I will assist to emerge victorious,” in front of a shit ton of people at a rally last week, but President Samia Suluhu Hassan didn’t get the joke and fired his ass, the BBC reports.

It’s not clear if Hassan was mad at Nnauye for the old “quiet part out loud,” or if she was genuinely punishing the assclown. She did not offer any specific reason for it while announcing Nnauye was canned along with fired Foreign Minister January Makamba. CCM has been in power since 1977 and is constantly accused of rigging elections, so maybe it was Nnauye just being a blabbedmouth.

Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer on Monday endorsed Vice President Kamala Harris for the Dem presidential nomination which, along with nods from Maryland Gov Wes Moore, Kentucky Gov Andy Beshear, Illinois Gov JB Prizker, Pennsylvania Gov Josh Shapiro, and we lost count of the rest of them, means that in political media tropes all the potential challengers have “gotten in line.”

Former Vice President Mike Pence did not endorse Harris but instead praised Joe Biden’s decision to drop out, tweeting “President Joe Biden made the right decision for our country and I thank him for putting the interests of our Nation ahead of his own.” The replies are pretty good.

House Oversight Chairbilly James Comer will on Monday yell a bunch of stupid shit at Secret Service Director Kim Cheatle as his committee scrambles to divert attention back on the failed assassination attempt against convicted felon former President Trump last weekend in Pennsylvania.

New York City Mayor Eric Adams on Monday gave his full support to Vice President Kamala Harris for the Democratic nomination, Politico reports on what could be a possible bid for Ambassador to Turkey or maybe a special task force on how to improve US-Turkish relations, maybe even just an invite to a future state dinner with a Turkish delegation with a seat next to Recep Erdogan.

“I think she is the voice that the party needs right now,” said Adams during an appearance on MSNBC’s Morning Joe. He didn’t mention anything about Turkey or warn Harris to watch out for ghosts in the White House, but he would probably be eager to help catch them if she moves in.

Dem strategist Ken Pennington estimates that Democrats could surpass $90 million in donations by the 24 hour mark of President Joe Biden ending his reelection campaign and endorsing Veep Kamala Harris to replace him as the nominee to face convicted felon former President Trump.

Im going to ask…

From an @FEC and Campaign finance law point of view… shouldn’t this page be a violation?

Its original assets were created by the staff of the principal campaign of President Biden. All that was done here was the name swap but the original assets were done… https://t.co/SznBdyvYRc

— George Santos (@MrSantosNY) July 22, 2024

Not for nothing, but shouldn’t a dude who’s been under indictment for more than a year at this point for having violated like a shit ton of federal campaign finance laws have read up on it as to come up with a strategy for his defense? Feels like he should at least be able to answer his own question about it rather than just speculate openly to anyone who would listen on social media.

It’s that time-honored election year tradition: Newsmax reports a caravan of over 3,000 migrants from Central America have begun inching their way from Mexico’s southern frontier northward toward the United States, giving them and other right wing propaganda outlets something else to talk about now that the campaign has been shaken up in a deeply disadvantageous way.

“Some of the members of the group said they hoped to make it to the US border before elections are held in November, because they fear if Donald Trump wins, he will follow through on a promise to close the border to asylum-seekers,” Newsmax writes as if the migrants weren’t fed that sentiment.

🚨 INCOMING 🚨 BIG MANCHIN NEWS 🚨 HOLD ON 🚨 BREAKING 🚨 West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin made a BIG announcement Monday morning about his plans to run for president in a contested Democratic convention primary whatever against Vice President Kamala Harris 🚨 BUZZ ALERT! 🚨 Manchin told CBS News he will not be running for president. WOW! “I’m not running for office. I’m not going to be a candidate for president… I don’t need that in my life,” he said.

“The Democrats pick a candidate, Crooked Joe Biden, he loses the Debate badly, then panics, and makes mistake after mistake, is told he can’t win, and decide they will pick another candidate, probably Harris. They stole the race from Biden after he won it in the primaries – A First! These people are the real THREAT TO DEMOCRACY!” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Monday, getting an early start to what will surely be a long day of bitching and complaining.

The denial stage of the fat bastard’s grief continued with “It’s a new day and Joe Biden doesn’t remember quitting the race yesterday! He is demanding his campaign schedule and arranging talks with Presidents Xi of China, and Putin of Russia, concerning the possible start of World War 3.”

The amount this single tweet may have just done for the youth vote is not insignificant. https://t.co/VyQQVZnKmE

— David Hogg 🟧 (@davidhogg111) July 22, 2024

Still lost? NOTUS political reporter Jasmine Wright declares the Charlie XCX tweet is “is worth more than a million dollars of paid media.” Still lost? Former DailyKos editor Susan Gardner posts “The meaning, folks: she’s an up and coming pop star with 3.6 million followers and a new top selling album called BRAT that references sassy, powerful young women. This is an endorsement”

Former President Barack Obama, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, former Speaker Nancy Pelosi, and House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries did not hold back on endorsing Vice President Kamala Harris on Sunday for any reason that has anything to do with Harris herself so much as, per Politico Playbook, they didn’t want to be “seen as back-room party bosses engineering a Harris coronation. And if there’s a real challenge they want to be able to unite the party again when there’s a nominee. Having said that, from our conversations on Sunday, we would not be surprised if one or more of the three congressional leaders (especially Schumer) gets on board with Harris this week.”

“As of 9pm ET, grassroots supporters have raised $46.7 million through ActBlue following Vice President Kamala Harris’ campaign launch. This has been the biggest fundraising day of the 2024 cycle. Small-dollar donors are fired up and ready to take on this election,” said ActBlue in a statement on the actual quantifiable change that Kamala Harris has brought to the campaign.

UPDATE 7/22/2024 6:05 AM EDT: Make that $49.6 million, per CNN’s Edward-Isaac Dovere, who notes that it’s already eclipsed disgraced former President Trump’s $34.5 million haul in the 24 hours or so after May 30th, when a jury in Manhattan convicted him on 34 felony counts for interfering in the 2016 election by illegally covering up his hush money payoffs to a pornstar.

Stevie’s boss just posted “It’s not over! Tomorrow Crooked Joe Biden’s going to wake up and forget that he dropped out of the race today!” and “Biden never had Covid. He is a threat to Democracy!”

Let there be no doubt that Team Orange is really freaking the fuck out over what just happened.

Convicted felon former President Trump as he continued to fail to cope with losing his opponent on Sunday, posting on Truth Social “So, we are forced to spend time and money on fighting Crooked Joe Biden, he polls badly after having a terrible debate, and quits the race. Now we have to start all over again. Shouldn’t the Republican Party be reimbursed for fraud in that everybody around Joe, including his doctors and the Fake News Media, knew he was not capable of running for, or being, President? Just askin’?” without elaborating on who owes them the money.

The Orange Slob also posted “My debate with Crooked Joe Biden, the Worst President in the history of the United States, was slated to be broadcast on Fake News ABC, the home of George Slopadopolus, sometime in September. Now that Joe has, not surprisingly, has quit the race, I think the Debate, with whomever the Radical Left Democrats choose, should be held on FoxNews, rather than very biased ABC. Thank you! DJT” making it clear he’s afraid to debate Kamala Harris.

“I am honored to have the President’s endorsement and my intention is to earn and win this nomination… Over the past year, I have traveled across the country, talking with Americans about the clear choice in this momentous election. And that is what I will continue to do in the days and weeks ahead. I will do everything in my power to unite the Democratic Party – and unite our nation – to defeat Donald Trump and his extreme Project 2025 agenda,” says Vice President Kamala Harris in a brief statement confirming she’s running (we didn’t actually know where she stood on that yet, lol).

“Crooked Joe just got knocked out, so now I’ll have to do it a FOURTH TIME!!!” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Sunday. If we had to guess the “FOURTH TIME” should have been “THIRD TIME” because he thinks he won the 2020 election and he’s so rattled and drugged up to his eyeballs that he can’t even count properly. Going to call it now that he fucks off from debating Harris in September and the campaign’s excuse is that he agreed to face Biden, not her.

No major potential Democratic candidates like Gavin Newsom or Gretchen Whitmer are preparing to challenge Vice President Kamala Harris at the DNC next month, CBS News reports.

Bill and Hillary Clinton quickly endorsed Harris as have some key Congressional Dems.

Harris herself hasn’t released any statement yet, but hopefully we’ll get a live news conference or address or something to set the tone for Monday’s news coverage of her debut as heir apparent.

And that’s all we have to fit into three brief items just as an excuse to run that deadline.

Brainwormed independent candidate Robert F Kennedy Jr on Sunday announced he will be holding a press conference at 5 PM EDT from the Kennedy Compound in Hyannisport on Cape Cod.

What sticks out is that he’s being allowed to use “Camelot” for the press conference. Like we’re not trying to get ahead of ourselves here but if it means he’s reconciled with his family then what does it mean for his campaign? Is this the end of the line for this whole stupid shitshow?

“Crooked Joe Biden was not fit to run for President, and is certainly not fit to serve – And never was! He only attained the position of President by lies, Fake News, and not leaving his Basement” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Sunday in response to his campaign just losing the elderly opponent they prepared to run against for three fucking years, now facing a 59 year-old Black female former prosecutor who made both of his attorneys general shit their pants on live TV.

My fellow Democrats, I have decided not to accept the nomination and to focus all my energies on my duties as President for the remainder of my term. My very first decision as the party nominee in 2020 was to pick Kamala Harris as my Vice President. And it’s been the best… pic.twitter.com/x8DnvuImJV

— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) July 21, 2024

Continued after the cutoff: “Today I want to offer my full support and endorsement for Kamala to be the nominee of our party this year. Democrats — it’s time to come together and beat Trump. Let’s do this.” Not sure if this was some kind of purposeful suspense or what the hell just happened, but here it is a half hour later: Joe Biden officially endorsed Kamala Harris to be his successor.

It’s National Zero’s official editorial position that the whole “blitz primary” fantasy is complete bullshit and Biden should take a few weeks for a farewell tour before resigning and allowing to go into November as the incumbent 47th President of the United States running for a full term.