Disgraced former President Trump on Monday went considerably further than he did the previous day as far as feckless supplicant Ronna Not-Romney McDaniel’s future leading the RNC goes.

The fat bastard for real called for the duck-lipped assclown to step aside from he post and then rambled a bunch of other shit about his endorsement record in 2022 (which actually sucked because he endorsed people like James Lankford, who was never going to lose to a Dem).

Trump also claimed American elections are “not free and fair,” called the whole country “pathetic,” said the border bill is a “trap for Republicans,” and warned that the “country is finished” if Biden is reelected while also claiming nobody ever heard of “supply change” (chains) before 2021.

The National Labor Relations Board rules that the Dartmouth University men’s basketball team may form a union and ordered an election for union officers, Politico reports, an event that could shake up college athletics for many high-profile teams.  The Dartmouth union is expected to join SEIU.

It’s not the first time a college team has tried to organize a union:  in 2015, Northwestern University’s football team held a vote to organize, but the ballots were never tallied and the effort was later dismissed by the NLRB.  Since 2021, players have been able to profit off their name, image and likenesses (NIL) from endorsement deals, and the ability to unionize will allow college athletes to have greater control over the enterprises and work conditions.

Former South Carolina Gov Nikki “Birdbrain” Haley has formally requested a presidential candidate detail from the Secret Service, citing threats from MAGA terrorists, the Wall Street Journal reports.

“Since Joe Biden has been in office, CBP has averaged over 6,700 apprehensions per day, and the vast majority have been released under a policy known as catch-and-release. Approximately 60 percent of all border apprehensions are single adults, a good number of whom are men of military age. The Border Act of 2024 will codify into law authorities that US Border Patrol agents never had in the past. This will allow us to remove single adults expeditiously and without a lengthy judicial review, which historically has required the release of these individuals into the interior of the US.”

“This alone will drop illegal border crossings nationwide and will allow a great many of our agents to get back to detecting and apprehending those who want to cross our borders illegally and evade apprehension. While not perfect, the Border Act of 2024 is a step in the right direction and is far better than the status quo, which is why the National Border Patrol Council endorses this bill and hopes for a quick passage,” writes Border Patrol Union President Brandon Judd.

The right wing media never shuts up about this guy, they freaking love him, as does Trump.

Just to actually correct the record, on September 27, 2022, Trump wrote in a statement, emphasis added, “Senator James Lankford ran a strong Campaign against highly credible opponents who fought hard but” blah blah blah “James Lankford is Strong on the Border, Tough on Crime, and Very Smart on the Economy. He is fighting to Stop Inflation, Defend our under siege Second Amendment, and Restore American Energy Independence, just as we had it during the Trump Administration where we would soon be, in fact, Energy Dominant. Sadly, that went up in dust with the Biden Administration-but James will help us get it back. It is my great honor to give James Lankford my Complete and Total Endorsement!” So the record’s been re-corrected.

Heels-wearing Florida Governor Ron DeSantis on Monday endorsed a proposal to arrest homeless people and stick them in internment camps that will allegedly have “security, sanitation and access to behavioral health services,” the Miami Herald reports on a final solution-y solution.

“We feel that if the Legislature is willing to lean in on this, that we want to be there to be able to offer support, but it’s got to be done right,” said DeSantis at a news conference in Miami Beach. “It’s got to be done in ways that is focused primarily on ensuring public order, ensuring quality of life for residents, ensuring that people’s property values are maintained,” Ron continued.

Moron Colorado Congresswoman Lauren Boebert last week was granted a temporary restraining order against her white trash dick-wagging ex-husband Jayson, with a hearing coming up to determine whether it can be made permanent, CBS News reports on more fun for the Clampetts.

Wow, what a real upgrade from George Santos the GOP has going here in the special election. Really slick how she doesn’t answer basic questions about her support for you know who.

“President Donald J Trump won the Iowa caucuses with the largest margin ever for a non-incumbent and the New Hampshire primary with the most votes of any candidate from either party. He is the presumptive Republican nominee and the leading candidate for President of the United States. In our system of ‘government of the people, by the people, [and] for the people,’ the American people – not courts or election officials – should choose the next President of the United States.”

“As this Court has explained: ‘The right to vote freely for the candidate of one’s choice is of the essence of a democratic society, and any restrictions on that right strike at the heart of representative government.’ Yet at a time when the United States is threatening sanctions against the socialist dictatorship in Venezuela for excluding the leading opposition candidate for president from the ballot, respondent Anderson asks this Court to impose that same anti-democratic measure at home. To date, at least 60 state and federal courts throughout the country have refused to remove President Trump from the ballot. The Colorado Supreme Court is the lone outlier, and this Court should reverse, for the reasons below, and protect the rights of the tens of millions of Americans who wish to vote for President Trump,” write fat former President Trump’s lawyers in the intro to their reply brief to the Supreme Court ahead of Thursday’s big showdown.

The next section starts off with the lawyers arguing that the president “is not an officer of the United States” even though Trump’s own lawyers claimed he was an “officer” no less than 11 times on May 4th of last year when they tried to get his Manhattan indictment moved to federal court.

Ruling that malevolent razorback Elise Stefanik, idiot RNC chairwoman Ronna Not-Romney, demented MAGA Congresswoman Claudia Tenney, and other plaintiffs “failed to satisfy their burden to demonstrate beyond a reasonable doubt that the Early Mail Voter Act is unconstitutional,” the Supreme Court of New York on Monday tossed a Republican challenge to said act.

Since New York’s state court system is stupid, this is not the final stop because the “Court of Appeals” is actually the highest state level court. Or maybe it is the final stop if they decide that their time and money might be better spent on things other than dead-end legal challenges.

Lancaster, Pennsylvania K9 Zoltan has worked his last shift with the city’s police department, as his partner Officer Jay Hatfield decided it was time for the 9 year-old Hungarian German Shepherd to enjoy the time he has left after being diagnosed with b-cell lymphoma, Lancaster Online reports.

“With a heavy heart, we are announcing K9 Zoltan’s retirement. Due to advancing cancer, Zoltan’s final shift with the Lancaster City Police was yesterday, Feb 4, 2024, with B Platoon,” said a statement from the department “We’d like to extend our heartfelt gratitude to Zoltan for his dedication and exceptional service to the Bureau and our community.” Zoltan is the second hardest-biter on Lancaster’s four dog team, despite being significantly older than the other K9s.

Douchebag MAGA influencer Benny Johnson is really, really, really upset over the Senate’s border-Ukraine-Israel package, so much so that he’s calling for the Republicans who negotiated it – not the Democrats, which we guess we should just assume is a given – to be prosecuted.

“Every person who’s a Republican that touched this bill needs to lose their jobs immediately, needs to be criminally prosecuted. Quite literally. Like, there should be prosecutions for this. You wanna talk about insurrections? You wanna talk about traitors to our nation? Here’s a great example of what an insurrection looks like in practice. OK? An armed takeover of the systems of power. Because what you do by bringing in 30, 40, 50 million people from the third world who don’t share our country’s history, don’t share the language of our country, the traditions of our country, the norms of our country, the morals of our country, what you do is you create a permanent political underclass that could be exploited for power,” raged the four-eyed weasel to his millions-strong podcast audience.

A new batch of findings from last week’s CNN survey showing disgraced former President Trump leading President Joe Biden 49 to 45 percent also finds most respondents nevertheless opposed to the Hitler-like shit the fat bastard has openly planned to do if he ends up elected again.

“Detain and deport millions of undocumented immigrants” scored 52 percent opposed, “Repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act, also known as Obamacare” 61 percent opposed, “Direct the Justice Department to investigate his political rivals” 69 percent opposed, “Pardon himself for any federal crimes he is convicted of” 71 percent opposed, “Fire people in the federal workforce who oppose implementing his policies” 66 opposed, and “Pardon most people convicted of crimes for their involvement in the Jan 6 attack on the US Capitol” scored 69 percent opposed.

“Crooked Joe Biden has just announced that he will not be doing the big Super Bowl Interview. A great decision, he can’t put two sentences together. I WOULD BE HAPPY TO REPLACE HIM – would be ‘RATINGS GOLD!'” writes fat former President Trump on Truth Social, as if the Super Bowl itself isn’t already “ratings gold,” especially one with the more popular Taylor Swift in attendance.

We seriously doubt CBS would bite, but Marge Brennan beaning him with hardballs during what might end up being the most-watched telecast in history would be pretty entertaining. Biden’s team says they’re skipping it simply to avoid pushing politics during what’s supposed to be an apolitical event. “We hope viewers enjoy watching what they tuned in for – the game,” White House Comms director Ben LaBolt told CNN. It’s not the worst reason to duck it, though it obviously helps fuel the perception that Mr Let’s Inject Fucking Bleach wrote in the above Truth Social post.

The fat bastard also posted an attempt to get out ahead of the political fallout his sabotaging of the legislation meant to address what he’s always crying about, writing “The ridiculous ‘Border’ Bill is nothing more than a highly sophisticated trap for Republicans to assume the blame on what the Radical Left Democrats have done to our Border, just in time for our most important EVER Election.”

“The proposed Senate border deal is an absolute nonstarter for me because it simply puts into law the invasion currently happening at our southern border. All throughout this campaign, I have advocated for securing our border, as the migrant crisis that was created by Tom Suozzi and Joe Biden has brought severe negative quality of life impacts to the residents of CD-3. This deal does not accomplish that goal at all, and in fact sets a threshold of at least 1.5 million additional migrants entering our country each year. That is truly appalling. Beyond this, as I have said all along, I do not believe that linking aid to Israel and Ukraine to a border deal is the best way to move forward, and all these pressing issues should be dealt with separately and swiftly. I do not support what amounts to the legalization of the invasion of our country. I have my doubts whether the legislation will even make it out of the Senate,” says would-be George Santos replacement Mazi Pilip in a statement ripping into the bipartisan border-Ukraine-Israel aid bill ahead of her special election next week.

Which means a former IDF soldier doesn’t want US aid for her comrades and kind of hands that part of the issue to her New York 3rd Congressional district rival former Congressman Tom Suozzi. CNN was making kind of a big deal about the race this morning, characterizing it as “tight” and that Suozzi was worried blah blah blah. It was hard to tell how much of that was just horserace bullshit, and there was definitely plenty of horserace bullshit, versus how much of it was based in reality. The “border crisis” is now the central issue of the election and now the Republican is against actually doing something about it. So we’ll get a good read on how this is shaking out next week.

Lou Dobbs knows a thing or two about progress, having gone over the last 15 years from the 7 pm weekday time slot on CNN to “Lindell TV,” making him the right guy to measure situational change.

“Only a fool, or a Radical Left Democrat, would vote for this horrendous Border Bill, which only gives Shutdown Authority after 5000 Encounters a day, when we already have the right to CLOSE THE BORDER NOW, which must be done. This Bill is a great gift to the Democrats, and a Death Wish for The Republican Party. It takes the HORRIBLE JOB the Democrats have done on Immigration and the Border, absolves them, and puts it all squarely on the shoulders of Republicans. Don’t be STUPID!!! We need a separate Border and Immigration Bill. It should not be tied to foreign aid in any way, shape, or form! The Democrats broke Immigration and the Border. They should fix it,” writes fat former President Trump on Truth Social Monday morning, in his own way of giving Congressional Republicans room to operate independently from his own political needs.

Which is to say none at all. The majority of them are doing exactly what he’s telling them to do.

“Deciding where your duty lies – family, work, or country, is never an easy task. Earlier last year, I decided to take some time off from running for public office to recharge and spend more time in Indiana with my family. However, looking where we are today, and urged by many of my constituents, I do not believe I would be able to deliver this Congress, with the current failed leadership in Washington, DC, on the important issues for our nation that I have worked very hard on. As someone who grew up under tyranny, I understand the significance of these challenging times for our Republic, and if my fellow Hoosiers and God decide, I will be honored to continue fighting for them. We must carry on the sacrifice of countless Americans for our liberties and keep the American dream alive for our children,” says Republican Indiana Congresswoman Victoria Spartz in a statement announcing she would in run for reelection after dropping out last year.

President Biden should instead use his executive authority to reinstitute the Trump policies he canceled:

➡️ Remain in Mexico

➡️ Title 42

➡️ Wall construction

— Steve Daines (@SteveDaines) February 5, 2024

The chair of the Senate GOP’s campaign arm chose this moment to pledge allegiance to the Orange God Emperor to preserve his “signature campaign issue.” The ads are writing themselves.

Disgraced former President Trump’s campaign are starting to get nervous about the clusterfuck in Nevada as a Republican primary to be held Tuesday and a MAGA caucus on Thursday have created a situation in which rival Nikki “Birdbrain” Haley could end up capturing more votes than Donald, even as he’s already guaranteed to win all 36 of the state’s RNC delegates by default, Axios reports.

Long and pretty stupid story as short as possible, the Nevada GOP decided they were going to fuck off from the state-run primary because something “election integrity” bullshit and do a caucus instead, but they made what could be a costly mistake for Trump when they decided that candidates had to choose one or the other and could not appear on both ballots. Haley’s on Tuesday’s primary ballot, Trump is on Thursday’s caucus. Problem for Trump now is that 50,000 people have already voted early in the primary and his minions are worried they might not even get that much turnout for the caucus, giving Haley another boost politically if not electorally.

It’s now at the point where Trump is accusing the Dem Secretary of State Francisco Aguilar’s office of “election interference” by telling people they can’t legally vote in both the primary and the caucus – which is actually true. Worse, the caucus is probably going to be a complete fucking mess unto itself as this will be the first one ever held in Nevada with only one full-time staffer running it.