Suspect identified in Twatergate break-in

New developments in the Twatergate scandal as cops in Loudon County, Virginia have positively identified 39 year-old Toby Shane Kessler as the prime suspect in the break-in at a Trump campaign office in a strip mall in a suburban town 30 miles outside of Washington, DC, Politico reports.

Kessler is a drifter with no known address and a lengthy record of stupid, petty crimes like loitering and impersonation, making him the perfect foil for some huge Deep State plot or whatever.

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