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Texas oilmen assure lawmakers that treated “waste brine” perfectly fine for water supplies but want immunity from lawsuits just in case

“Waste brine,” an oil extraction byproduct long considered far too toxic for drinking water supplies that is typically dumped underground or repurposed for fracking, is getting a second look in Texas where H2O supplies are strained by rapid population growth, leaky infrastructure, and uneven rainfall. The Lone Star State’s oilmen, always happy to find a way to make a quick buck and finding themselves with more of the brine than they can offload – the ratio of waste brine to crude oil extracted seriously averages about five-to-one barrels – are looking to fill in the market’s demands.

Buuuuuuuut, as the Texas Tribune reports, even though the oilmen swear the water’s safe to drink after it’s been properly treated, the just want to make sure all their bases are covered. You know, just in case of anything pesky like cancer or birth defects show up in regions of the state whose water utilities are being supplemented with the brine. Better safe than sorry is their thinking on that angle and as such their employees in the state legislator are working on passing a bill to immunize them.

And the companies contracted to treat the water too. Can’t have them getting bankrupted by some kid who needs a double kidney transplant. They’ll be performing an important service for Texans.

One issue the bill doesn’t address is that the name “waste brine” has too many negative if vague connotations. The bill should call it “Liberty Water” or something and market it with “Texas’s own source of freedom from thirst.” That’ll increase social pressure to avoid telling friends and neighbors something like “Ugh, my pancreas failed because of too much Liberty Water” like some gay libtard.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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