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American teenager arrested in Antarctica

American pliot Ethan Guo, 19, is facing charges in Chile for unlawfully landing in Antarctica during his seven-continent flight across the world aiming to raise $1 million for cancer research, CNN reports on some pretty bizarre shit. Guo is accused of “multiple national and international regulations” by changing his flight plans without prior notice, landing on a part of Antarctica where the South American country maintains a territorial claim that isn’t actually recognized internationally.

“The accused provided false information to the aeronautical authority. He submitted a flight plan indicating that he was going to fly over the city of Punta Arenas,” said Cristian Crisosto Rifo, the Regional Prosecutor of Magallanes and Chilean Antarctica, which again, should just be Magallanes since there is no such thing as “Chilean Antarctica.” Nations can build and maintain research bases and what not but they cannot, by international treaty, claim sovereignty over the continent.

“However, he continued toward Antarctica without informing anyone and without any authorization, landing at the airfield of Lieutenant Rodolfo Marsh Base in Chilean Antarctic territory. With this behavior, the accused seriously endangered the safety of air traffic to Antarctica and the Magallanes region,” the prosecutor added. It’s fucking Antarctica, not Lower Manhattan or the National Mall.

Cristoso explained that as soon as Guo landed in Antarctica, he was detained and formally charged for the made-up crime. “The accused not only violated the Aeronautical Code but also multiple national and international regulations regarding routes to Antarctica and access to the white continent,” Crisosto continued. Somebody do a check on this guy. He might secretly be The Thing and is terrified that Guo might expose it before the pathogen can assimilate more people.

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