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Baby Jessica fell into a jail cell

The now-40 year-old woman whose toddler-hood adventure inspired the smash-hit Beau Bridges and Patty Duke made-for-TV-movie Everybody’s Baby: The Rescue of Jessica McClure found herself at least temporarily confined within a hard concrete structure in Midland, Texas again this week and this time it was kind of her fault rather than her idiot aunt’s. KMID reports that McClure, now McClure-Morales, was arrested Saturday night following a reported domestic disturbance at her home and was subsequently charged with assault causing bodily injury involving family violence.

Further details were unavailable, like if she threatened to throw her husband and/or kids down a well so they can fucking see how it feels to be trapped in one of those things for 58 fucking hours.

The full police report on the arrest will not be released until some time next week. Until then and once again, recommended reading for those who haven’t clicked the last two or three times National Zero recommended it: The New York Times’s 1995 feature on Robert O’Donnell, the firefighter who was the one to free McClure from the well but then spiraled into depression in the aftermath and subsequently committed suicide. Rob’s tragic end is not funny, the rest of the story is fucking hilarious. The part about there being two separate factions of rescuers – the McClure Rescue Association and the Jessica McClure Rescuers’ Association – formed to fight each other over the royalties from the TV movie when it eventually got made, is the most Simpsons-esque thing in real life ever and arguably even funnier than the “Timmy O’Toole” episode obviously inspired by Jessica.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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