Several Trump minions admit to Axios that Monday’s stock market shitshow was definitely not what they needed, “but” they remain optimistic because they’re making America great again and so on.

One adviser said “Ever since the election, Trump has been the master of the narrative. We won every day.” Just gotta stop right there and call this anonymous cocksucker out on the “win every day” horseshit campaign mantra that was already long tired when “winning” meant getting media attention over unforced clusterfucks like the NABJ interview. Now the “winning” is wiping out over a trillion in the stock market’s value over unforced clusterfucks like being unwilling to rule out a recession in a softball state media interview with batshit idiot Maria Bartiromo. Christ.

“But this stock market fall is just different, no control. But it’s just a detox – it’ll get better,” the same asshole continued, double “but”-ing his “mastery of the narrative.” These insufferable mutants.

“The market isn’t great, not gonna lie. But the vibes are still good otherwise,” said another “but”-head. A third said Team Orange “are adept at playing the long game [lol, how are the Panama Canal and Gaza annexation projects going, you twat], and we will not be dictated by a snapshot in time when there are so many indicators that show we’re building a strong economy with staying power.”

Outside of the Orange God Emperor’s innermost circle the mercury was rising decidedly higher and faster. “If the stock market looks like this in three weeks, we’ve got a problem,” a “top consultant” to Republican Congressional candidates told Axios, adding “There’s time. It’s early.” Start praying, boy.

The fat bastard himself tried “winning the day” early on by posting “Despite the fact that Canada is charging the USA from 250 percent to 390 percent Tariffs on many of our farm products, Ontario just announced a 25 percent surcharge on ‘electricity,’ of all things, and your not even allowed to do that. Because our Tariffs are reciprocal, we’ll just get it all back on April 2. Canada is a Tariff abuser, and always has been, but the United States is not going to be subsidizing Canada any longer. We don’t need your Cars, we don’t need your Lumber, we don’t your Energy, and very soon, you will find that out,” and yeah, asserting “Your not even allowed to do that” will totally work, lol.