Category: Uncategorized

Fortunately no one was seriously injured when an apparently very confused 84 year-old driver’s flat tire turned into a raging inferno in Kenosha, Wisconsin on Tuesday night, ABC 7 reports. It’s likely the flux capacitor was burned beyond repair if the minivan was in fact equipped with one.

Billionaire Peter Thiel, a major donor to Republican candidates in previous election cycles, has told close associates he won’t financially support any candidates in the 2024 elections, largely because he’s tired of Republicans focusing on abortion and bogus “culture war” topics, Reuters reports.

Thiel backed two GOP Senate candidates in recent elections:  Blake Masters in Arizona, who lost, and JD Vance in Ohio, who won.  Thiel himself accounted for more than $30 million spent for GOP candidates in the 2022 midterms.

A three-judge panel in the DC Circuit Court rejected Donald Trump’s bid to block his former Vice President and intended piñata Mike Pence’s testimony before the federal grand jury hearing evidence presented by Special Counsel Jack Smith, per Politico’s Kyle Cheney.

Was a tough call between this clip and the other one where she again accused the Bidens of running a sex trafficking operation. Anyway, we need not explain to our readers why this is not a First Amendment issue, you’re all smart and don’t need to see it for the 5,000th goddamned time. What is funny though is that probably more than a handful of Newsmax viewers at this point also understand it too – and know its more like a shibboleth to a frustration they can’t actually elucidate. You can’t say “it’s cosmically unfair that my favorite TV host was fired as commercial decision by a corporate media giant that doesn’t give a fuck about me personally” so it needs to be re-grounded in a proximate legal reality as a violation of one’s sacred constitutional freedoms.

NBC News reports that Republican Florida Governor and Tom Cruise wannabe Ron DeSantis will formally announce a bid for the GOP nomination for president in 2024 in mid-May.  The timing likely meets the schedule for legislation to go through the Florida legislature to provide an exception for DeSantis to run for president and hold the state’s governorship, something that is not allowed under current Florida law.

Evidently feeling desperate enough to pull the same shit Joe Tacopina did by asking Jim Jordan to intervene in the Manhattan Stormy Daniels case, Trump lawyers Tim Palatore and Jim Trusty sent a letter Wednesday to House Intelligence Committee chairman Mike Turner pleading for some kind of intervention to stop their fat orange idiot client from being prosecuted by Jack Smith.

“We represent President Trump and are writing to provide information regarding the probe by the Department of Justice (‘DOJ’) into the post-Presidency handling of classified documents. We understand that DOJ is making the documents marked classified available for your review, and this letter provides the Committee with information that we suspect DOJ has not disclosed to it.”

“It has become abundantly clear through this investigation that the institutional practice and procedures within the White House for the handling of classified materials drastically differ from the long-established standard operating procedures employed by various agencies of the intelligence community as well as the US military… The solution to these issues is not a misguided, politically infected, and severely botched criminal investigation, but rather a legislative solution. DOJ should be ordered to stand down, and the intelligence community should instead conduct an appropriate investigation and provide a full report to this Committee, as well as your counterparts in the Senate. Armed with the appropriate knowledge, we respectfully suggest that your Committee hold hearings and make legislative changes to [create new rules Trump would have never followed anyway].”

A Colorado judge on Wednesday sentenced former Mesa County Elections Manager Sandra Brown to 30 days in jail and two years of probation for her role in QAnon freak former Clerk Tina Peters’s insane plan to tamper with Dominion equipment to “expose” the platform’s supposed vulnerability to hacking that cost disgraced former President Trump the 2020 election, KKCO reports.

Brown’s plea agreement requires her to testify against Peters in the plot with the judge warning her the lenient sentence can be pulled at any time if he doesn’t think she’s cooperating enough. Peters famously implicated herself when she leaked video of her personally-issued password to Mesa’s election data server, finding no proof and causing a decertification of the machines that ended up costing the county’s taxpayers millions to purchase new ballot tabulators from Dominion.

In other news it’s 2023 and we’re still regularly reporting on people under criminal investigation, going to jail, losing millions of dollars, or getting fired from their jobs because they either believed or at least pretended to believe the 2020 election was stolen from Trump, with no end in sight.

We haven’t been following dipshit Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy’s new budget bill because it’s not really that exciting news and is pointless too, but it passed on Wednesday. Yay!

Montana state House Republicans on Wednesday voted to ban trans Dem member Zooey Zephyr from the chamber for the remainder of the current session. Zephyr will be permitted to vote remotely.

Ruling that there is to be not another word about LinkedIn founder Reid Hoffman’s alleged financial support for EJ Carroll’s case against fat former President Trump, Manhattan federal Judge Lewis Kaplan for the second time on Wednesday warned lawyer Joe Tacopina to control his client and his moron son Eric, Law and Crime’s Adam Klasfeld reports.

Regarding Eric’s tweet, Kaplan told Tacopina, “If I were in your shoes, I’d be having a conversation with your client” and “there are some relevant United States statutes here and somebody on your side ought to be thinking about them.”

Today, a whistleblower will tell @JudiciaryGOP that Joe Biden’s government is acting as a “middleman” in a multibillion dollar migrant child trafficking op.

Why isn’t the Left outraged? https://t.co/8ib6DTruPd

— Rep. Jim Jordan (@Jim_Jordan) April 26, 2023

This would be sad if Jim were deserving of sympathy and ironic that a man credibly accused of ignoring sexual abuse is accusing others of doing the same if irony weren’t already dead.

“Damian Williams, the US Attorney for the Southern District of New York, announced that Brian Kolfage and Andrew Badolato were sentenced today by US District Judge Analisa Torres. Kolfage was sentenced to 51 months in prison, and Badolato was sentenced to 36 months in prison, for their respective roles in carrying out a scheme to defraud hundreds of thousands of donors in connection with an online crowdfunding campaign known as ‘We Build The Wall’ by soliciting donations using false statements and then stealing the resulting donations,” says a DOJ press release.

The third defendant Timmy Shea faces sentencing in June after being convicted in his second trial last year (four months after a MAGA juror caused a deadlock in the first one), while Bannon of course was pardoned by Trump, but later indicted at the state level in New York for the same crimes and faces trial in November. Then there’s his contempt of Congress bit which should start soon.

The Walt Disney Company on Wednesday filed a federal lawsuit against heels-wearing Florida Governor Ron DeSantis and his minions, alleging a “relentless campaign to weaponize government power” against its business in the state beginning with last year’s “Don’t Say Gay” shitshow.

“For more than half a century, Disney has made an immeasurable impact on Florida and its economy, establishing Central Florida as a top global tourist destination and attracting tens of millions of visitors to the State each year. People and families from every corner of the globe have traveled to Walt Disney World because of the unrivaled guest experience it provides and the deep emotional connection that generations of fans have with Disney’s timeless stories and characters. A targeted campaign of government retaliation – orchestrated at every step by Gov DeSantis as punishment for Disney’s protected speech – now threatens Disney’s business operations, jeopardizes its economic future in the region, and violates its constitutional rights,” wrote Disney in the complaint.

Prosecutors with the Manhattan District Attorney’s office on Wednesday asked New York Superior Court Judge Juan Merchan to impose a protective order against disgraced former President Trump to bar him from publicizing any of the evidence in their case against him over the 2016 Stormy Daniels hush money payments as he could sic MAGA terrorists on them, ABC News reports.

“Defendant Donald J Trump has a longstanding and perhaps singular history of attacking witnesses, investigators, prosecutors, trial jurors, grand jurors, judges, and others involved in legal proceedings against him, putting those individuals and their families at considerable safety risk,” the motion said, with a nice parting shot adding that the fat bastard is “currently under federal investigation for his handling of classified materials, [which] gives rise to significant concern that Defendant will similarly misuse grand jury and other sensitive materials here.” The motion was obviously filed before Trump endangered himself in the ongoing EJ Carroll rape lawsuit on Wednesday morning.

True to his brand, disgraced former President Trump managed to fuck things up for himself before the first full day of the EJ Carroll rape trial started on Wednesday by writing two Truth Social posts about the case, in the first of which he claimed Carroll “said there was a dress, using the ol’ Monica Lewinsky ‘stuff’, then she didn’t want to produce it. The dress should be allowed to be part of the case. This is a fraudulent & false story – Witch Hunt!” and then the other carrying on saying Carroll should have screamed in a crowded department store and filed a police report, so on and so forth.

An hour or so later, Carroll’s attorney Roberta Kaplan then read them to the court according to Law and Crime’s Adam Klasfeld, with Kaplan arguing that the posts violated court orders barring discussion of who is paying her and the DNA issue. This prompted federal Judge Lewis Kaplan (no relation) to ask lawyer Joe Tacopina why Trump “for three years, refused to give a DNA sample, and now he wants it in the case?” adding that it’s “entirely inappropriate” for Trump to be talking about it, and wondering if Donald’s trying to influence the public and/or jurors about the case.

Tacopina then said he’ll “try to address that with my client” and ask Trump to “refrain from any further posts regarding this case,” to which Judge Kaplan responded “Well, I hope you’re more successful… [Trump] may or may not be tampering with a new source of potential liability. And I think you know what I mean,” which probably means criminal liability for witness tampering.

Ivanka Trump last week separated her representation from that of her dumbass brothers Eric and Don Jr in the $250 million fraud and hired her own attorney in the lawsuit brought by New York Attorney General Leticia James’s office against the corrupt Trump Organization, Forbes reports.

Cliff Robert and Michael Farina of Robert and Robert had been representing all the three of the idiots since the lawsuit was filed in September, but Ivanka had retained another firm’s lawyers to serve as her co-counsels with Farina and Robert. Then last week Ivanka fired all of them and hired Bennet Moskowitz – who represents Jeffrey Epstein’s estate – to serve as her sole attorney.

The case’s discovery period ends this week and the trial is slated to begin in October. It’s not clear if getting her own lawyer means Ivanka will somehow cut a separate deal with James and “flip” on her brothers as this isn’t a criminal case, but it doesn’t sound good for the two morons.

Insolent punk Fox and Friends host Brian Kilmeade dared to successfully question RNC chair Ronna Not-Romney McDaniel on her claim that “President Trump never shies away from a debate” when in fact, as Kilmeade points out, he did skip one of the primary debates in 2016. “He did, he skipped one,” Ronna admits, before continuing to push that Trump is not afraid to debate.

Guess it was too much to expect Kilmeade to also point out how Trump also skipped what would’ve been his second debate against Biden in 2020, leading to its cancellation.

British Conservative MP Chris Pincher, who was appointed to a position in now-former Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s cabinet despite Johnson’s knowledge of Pinchy’s drunken dick-grabbing habit – a coverup which brought down Johnson last summer – announced on Wednesday he won’t be seeking reelection, Sky News reports. Kind of surprising since you would think the guy would have resigned already after being such a fucking embarrassment to his party and constituents.

Dem Hawaii Senator Mazie Hirono on Wednesday introduced a bill to end the practice of “judge-shopping” where usually MAGA litigants take their cases to the friendliest possible federal jurist to get a sweeping nationwide injunction against some policy they don’t like, CNN reports.

“When parties are able to choose their judges, it creates the perception that they are able to predetermine their case’s outcome, compromising the integrity of our federal justice system. Activist plaintiffs should not be able to hand-select individual judges to set nationwide policy, which is why it’s critical we address the issue of judge shopping in our federal courts,” said Hirono in a statement on legislation pretty obviously a response to far right asshole Texas federal Judge Matthew Kacsmaryk’s failed attempt to overturn the FDA’s approval of abortion drug mifepristone as well as other bullshit rulings against the Biden Administration, mostly from the Lone Star State.

Naturally the bill faces dim prospects, even though it should in theory benefit both Democrats and Republicans. There were plenty of nationwide injunctions against the Trump Administration that were arguably “shopped” by Dem attorneys general or left-leaning groups to make sure they landed in front of Obama or Clinton appointees. But why would Republicans work with Democrats on this for their own future benefit when they can just keep pestering the Biden Administration now?

Justice Department: “Stanlee Fazi, 41, of Louisa, Virginia, pleaded guilty in federal court in Alexandria to trafficking turtles in violation of the Lacey Act. Sentencing is scheduled for July 26. Fazi admitted that between July 31, 2017, and June 29, 2020, he illegally collected eastern box turtles from the wild and sold them on at least 27 occasions to buyers in California, Colorado, Florida, Maryland, New Jersey, Ohio, Texas and Wisconsin. Fazi received approximately $12,700 using Facebook Marketplace for these sales. Many of Fazi’s purchasers, in turn, smuggled the turtles from the United States to Hong Kong and China for the illegal pet trade. Fazi acknowledged binding the turtles in socks and shipping them by FedEx from Fredericksburg.”

“The federal Lacey Act is the nation’s oldest wildlife trafficking statute and prohibits, among other things, transporting or selling wildlife in interstate commerce if the wildlife were illegally taken or possessed under state laws. The Commonwealth of Virginia also prohibits taking turtles from the wild or selling them. The maximum sentence under the Lacey Act is five years in prison and a $250,000 fine. The eastern box turtle (Terrapene carolina carolina) is a subspecies of the common box turtle (Terrapene carolina). The eastern box turtle is native to forested regions of the eastern United States, including Virginia, with some isolated populations in the Midwest. The turtles typically reach a length of up to six inches and can live more than 100 years. The turtles have a domed carapace, which can display radiated lines or spots. Turtles with colorful markings are particularly prized in the domestic and foreign pet trade market.”