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Remember Mike Flynn, the disgraced Army general who hid contacts he had with the Russian government and also appeared with Putin at a Russian dinner?  Yeah, well now he’s challenging the bravery and patriotism of former MSNBC pundit Malcolm Nance, who joined the International Brigade fighting alongside Ukraine soldiers against an invading Russian army.

“So is he fighting for…” Flynn starts before being cut off by the hostess of the low budget cable access talk show on Mike Lindell’s broadcast network.  “Is he fighting for a fascist–I’m sorry [directed at hostess]–Is he fighting for a fascist dictator or is he fighting for communi–, y’know, for communism?  Y’know what, wh-wh-who’s side is he on here.  Y-Y-Y-Y’know, is he on the side of… a, ay, a, really… dat dat dat that’s, ah, that’s the first time I’ve seen that clip actually and, ah, I just find that fascinating, I mean… Y’know what?  [chuckles] War is not fair, and ah, y’know, is he, is he supposed to be a journalist that’s reporting the news or is he out there tryin’ to make the news?  What kind of, what kind of ploy is that, and frankly, y’know….”

The longest-serving member of the North Dakota Senate, Republican Ray Holmberg, is stepping down as chair of an influential committee because he was texting with a jailed alleged child pornographer, the Associated Press reports.

Jailhouse records show Holmberg, who is 79 years old, exchanging six dozen messages with Nicholas James Morgan-Derosier while Morgan-Derosier was being held at Grand Forks County Jail on child porn charges last August.  The jail recorded the times the text messages came in and went out, but they did not record the contents of the messages.

The local newspaper, the Forum of Fargo, obtained the jail records showing the exchange.  Holmberg told the newspaper he no longer had copies of the text messages, although he said Morgan-Derosier had done some yard work for him previously.  “They’re just gone,” he said.

An investigation by the US Department of Justice found that he State of Mississippi allowed the state prisons to devolve into unsafe places where prisoners had a hard time accessing health care, including mental health care, leading to the unwarranted deaths, the Washington Post reports.

At the Mississippi State Penitentiary at Parchman, at least 12 prisoners have died by suicide and 10 others were victims of homicide since December 31, 2019, a day when prisoners took control of parts of the prison in a riot, which lasted several weeks.

“We have concluded that the conditions at Parchman are severe, systemic and exacerbated by chronically deficient staffing and supervision, resulting in serious harm and substantial risk to people confined at the prison,” Associate Attorney General Kristen Clarke, who oversees Justice’s civil rights division, said at a news conference also attended by U.S. Attorneys Clay Joyner of Mississippi’s Northern District and Darren J. LaMarca of the Southern District.

The 94-year-old spouse of evangelical zealot Pat Robertson died Tuesday at her home in Virginia Beach, perhaps after an illness or because her soul was snatched by a demon who found a chink in her spiritual armor after nearly a century.

According to Politico, Dede Robertson met Pat at Yale University, where she was doing graduate work in nursing, in 1952, and became born-again a few months after her husband’s announcement.

“Mom was the glue that held the Robertson family together,” said Gordon Robertson, one of her four children, and the president and CEO of CBN. “She was always working behind the scenes. If it weren’t for Mom, there wouldn’t be a CBN.”

Colorado Republican Dave Williams, challenging incumbent Congressman Doug Lamborn in the June primary, sued Secretary of State Jen Griswold on Monday to force her to allow his name to appear as “Dave ‘Let’s Go Brandon’ Williams” on the ballot, the Colorado Post reports.

It’s extremely hard to write this without calling Williams a homophobic slur. Even just saying he’s a “cunt”, despite being accurate, doesn’t quite do this justice. With all due respect to our LGBT readers whom we would never want to alienate by denigrating them, this lawsuit is the gayest thing ever. Williams is not a homosexual, he’s just a a total bundle of sticks for wanting to have fucking “Let’s Go Brandon” in his name on the ballot. Sincere apologies for giving into our adolescent impulses here when trying to describe this fucking twatwaffle of a Republican.

A Columbus, Ohio doctor was found not guilty by a jury for providing high quantities of the painkiller fentanyl to fourteen hospital patients who all ended up dying, ABC News reports.

Dr. William Husel, 46, was charged in the deaths of the patients, all of whom were seeking care in Mount Carmel Health System, and each of whom was found to have been administered at least 500 micrograms of fentanyl within minutes of their deaths.

Husel has claimed that he was simply trying to ease the pain of terminally ill patients and that he was not attempting to cause their deaths.  Assisting a suicide is a felony in Ohio.

The Florida Senate on Wednesday ignored opponents’ objections citing damage to the state’s coffers and local taxpayers and voted 23 to 16 to revoke the Reedy Creek Improvement District that allows Disney World to self-govern its property in Central Florida, Florida’s Voice reports.

“They’re actually putting me on the witness stand on Friday. I am the first Republican member of Congress that is going to be forced to take the witness stand under oath and defend myself… I cannot believe I’m being forced to do this,” says the unfaithful wife, continuing to bitch over having to testify in her defense in a challenge to her eligibility for office under the 14th Amendment proscription on candidates determined to have engaged in sedition or rebellion.

Florida Gov Ron DeSantis’ plan to punish Disney for going all woke on him and opposing his “Don’t Say Gay” law by stripping their flagship theme park Disney World of its special jurisdictional status over its property in Central Florida could cost the state $2 billion in bond debt – adding $2,200 to the 2023 tax bills of homeowners in Orange and Osceola counties, InsideTheMagic.net reports.

“My concern is this bill essentially wipes away Disneys’ $2 billion of debt… if the legislative intent here is ultimately to attack them, then why would we want to cancel $2 billion of debt?” said Republican State Senator Jeff Brandes on Tuesday, who probably then got called a “groomer” by the patriots in the room for defending the pedophile predators at Disney.

“I have the ability to walk into the knife fight of the culture wars with more than just an index card. I know exactly how to play on the biggest stage there is – network television,” carpetbagging New Jerseyan Mehmet Oz claims, because the made-up “culture wars” the GOP is famous for demonstrates a lack of policy proposals that can impact the people of Pennsylvania, whose votes he seeks for a Senate seat.  So, no policy, just cult-like propaganda.

Remember the days when conservatives would preach about keeping government out of your bedroom, that government’s reach ended at your home’s doorstep?  The “culture wars” are a great big FU to American conservatism.

good morning i declare it hash brown day.

— Burger King (@BurgerKing) April 20, 2022

The premier professional tennis tournament Wimbledon has banned Russian and Belarusian players from the upcoming annual tournament in response to the Russian invasion of Ukraine and official Belarusian support for it, the Associated Press reports.

Two of the top ten men’s players and three of the top 20 women’s players are from Russia, and they will be barred from the tournament, the crown jewel of the Grand Slam tournaments.

A panel of American scientists, fully aware of the implications of such a public stance and the endless chortling it would draw, urged NASA to send a probe up to Uranus on Tuesday. “The Uranus Orbiter and Probe (UOP) should be the highest priority large mission,” says the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine in a press release on their decadal survey titled Origins, Worlds, and Life: A Decadal Strategy for Planetary Science and Astrobiology 2023-2032, adding “The UOP would conduct a multiyear orbital tour to transform knowledge of ice giants in general, and the Uranian system in particular, through flybys and the delivery of an atmospheric probe.” When discussing the report among themselves, the scientists probably went out of their way to pronounce the planet’s name as “YOUR-UH-NUS”, instead of “YOUR-ANUS” in a self-conscious gambit to avoid snickering about “probing” it. The main objective of a mission is to explore the possibilities of life forms crawling around in the gassy plumes of Uranus.

“The Enceladus Orbilander should be NASA’s second-highest priority large mission,” the press release also said, referring to a proposed mission to send an orbital probe equipped with a lander to Saturn’s sixth-largest moon, an icy world whose name is much easier to say with a straight face.

The US Secret Service reports a shooting Wednesday morning of an intruder at the residence of the Peruvian ambassador to the United States, the Associated Press reports.

A uniformed Secret Service agent on duty at the Emily J. Wilkins House, the official residence of Peruvian ambassador Luis Miguel Castilla Rubio, shot an intruder “following a confrontation.”  No officers were wounded, and the condition of the intruder was not reported.  The location of the ambassador was not noted.

A Connecticut state trooper was charged with manslaughter two years after he fired seven bullets into a Black driver seated in his car after a high speed chase, the Associated Press reports.

Brian North was allowed to turn himself in Tuesday night after being notified of the charges.  After booking, he was released on $50,000 bail and he was suspended by the police force; he had continued working as a trooper while the case was investigated.

Mubarak Soulemane had led police on a high-speed chase in January 2020 on Interstate 95 before being boxed in by police. An officer broke the passenger side window to allow another to fire a taser at Soulemane; the taser either malfunctioned or was ineffective.

Russian military leaders issued a deadline for Ukrainians still defending the besieged city of Mariupol to have them surrender by midnight (local time) one day after having issued a similar ultimatum but getting zero Ukrainians surrender, Reuters reports.

While Mariupol is largely in ruins due to consistent Russian shelling, an unknown number of Ukrainians have holed up in a Soviet-era steel plant that was built by the Soviets to be a bastion against a siege after the city fell to the Nazis in World War II.

After eight weeks, the Russians are making a renewed push in the east of Ukraine because offensive operations in the central part of the nation, specifically around the capital, Kyiv, have stagnated.  To try to break the stalemate at Mariupol, the Russians have continued rockets and artillery around the city, and they’ve reportedly use massive “bunker buster” bombs on the Azovstal steel plant.