Category: Uncategorized

Republican Texas state Representative Stan Geddes is hard at work keeping schools safe from cosplayers who get a little too into it by introducing the “Forbidding Unlawful Representation of Roleplaying in Education” or FURRIES Act, prohibiting students from engaging in “‘Non-Human Behavior,'” defined as “any type of behavior or accessory displayed by a student in a school district other than behaviors or accessories typically displayed by a member of the homo sapiens species. This includes: (A) using a litter box for the passing of stool, urine, or other human byproducts.”

“(B) A personal or outward display, except during a school play or by a school mascot, through surgical or superficial means of features that are non-human, such as: tails, leashes, collars, or other accessories designed for pets, fur other than naturally occurring human hair or a wig made to look like human hair, artificial, animal-like ears, or other physiological features that have not historically been assigned to the homo sapiens species through a means of natural biological development.”

“(C) Barking, meowing, hissing, or other animal noises that are not human speech. (D) Licking oneself or others for the purpose of grooming or maintenance,” continued the 10-page bill.

It’s not clear if there’s any accompanying press release in which Geddes describes at length multiple instances of such behaviors occurring in Texas schools or, perhaps more importantly, why Geddes is about three years late with this stupid bullshit as the MAGA furry freakout peaked in 2022.

Turkish cops on Wednesday arrested Istanbul Mayor Ekrem Imamoglu, his top political aide, and over 100 of his allies and associates in what dictator Recep Erdogan’s regime claims is part of an investigation into links to terrorism and corruption, the Times of Israel reports on an extra convenient coincidence given that it comes just after Erdawg’s ruling AK Party took a beating in local elections this month and days before the opposition Republican People’s Party (CHP) was expected to give Imamoglu the nod for the 2028 presidential election at a convention this Sunday.

“Currently, there is a power in place to prevent the nation from determining the next president,” said CHP chair Ozgur Ozel. “We are facing an attempted coup against our next president.” The party nomination vote is unlikely to be held with Imamoglu’s bail status unclear. Cops imposed a four day ban on public demonstrations in Istanbul so Erdawg and his minions wouldn’t be annoyed.

House Dems stage coordinated 'Town Halls' on GOP colleagues' turf: 'Part of a game' https://t.co/w4PRmRSrYx

— Fox News (@FoxNews) March 19, 2025

US Attorney General Pam Bondi on Tuesday took the time out of her no doubt extremely busy day serving the American people as chief law enforcement officer to sign off on a statement one of her minions wrote that read: “The swarm of violent attacks on Tesla property is nothing short of domestic terrorism. The Department of Justice has already charged several perpetrators with that in mind, including in cases that involve charges with five-year mandatory minimum sentences. We will continue investigations that impose severe consequences on those involved in these attacks, including those operating behind the scenes to coordinate and fund these crimes.”

Yeah, that last bit definitely smacks of writing a check one’s ass is incapable of cashing. Yeah, she can and will distract the fanboys with other shit, new “Monsters of the Week,” and so on but it’s one thing to deter these attacks by assigning FBI agents to overnight stakeouts at fucking Tesla dealerships, which she’s probably already doing. Another is claiming that she’s going to uncover the vast shadowy army of terrorists and their leaders, setting herself up for some follow-up questions that never get answered as lone wolf after lone wolf bring fire and fury to Ketamine Brain’s empire.

“If a President doesn’t have the right to throw murderers, and other criminals, out of our Country because a Radical Left Lunatic Judge wants to assume the role of President, then our Country is in very big trouble, and destined to fail!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday.

On that note, the family of 24 year-old Venezuelan asylum claimant Francisco Casique tells the Independent he’s currently locked up in El Salvadoran dictator Nayib Bukele’s megaprison, having been sent there instead of back home because of tattoos that say “peace” and the names of his sisters, mother, and grandmother, that ICE thought were gang tags. Or they knew what they said but they sent the kid to El Salvador anyway just to bump up the numbers of “gang members” deported.

WATCH:

HAMAS flags were flown outside the White House tonight where protesters chanted in support of Mahmoud Khalil & “death to Israel”. Many other attendees brought prayer mats and shouted Allahu Akbar as they occupied the front of the White House.

This is Islamic supremacy. pic.twitter.com/j5rgt2h9CD

— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) March 19, 2025

The Louisiana Department of Corrections on Tuesday NITRO defeated condemned double murderer Jessie Hoffman in the first ever NITRO execution in the Pelican State, the Associated Press reports.

Following Alabama’s so-far successful use of NITROgen gas to kill four inmates, Louisiana decided to give it a go, and NITROed Hoffman after 15 years of dicking around trying to acquire the necessary drugs for a lethal injection. Tuesday’s NITROing came after the Supreme Court voted 5 to 4 to let Hoffman die. Justice Neil Gorsuch sides with the libs over some religious freedom shit.

A statement from the University of Nevada Las Vegas reveals that the Trump Administration is not screwing around with these Ivory Tower wokesters and will pursue them wherever they try to hide from the forces of America First patriots reimposing merit-based higher education in the US.

They’re serious. Dead serious. “UNLV is aware of the federal investigation. Three former UNLV professors were participants in the mentoring program known as the PHD Project. Two of them are no longer with UNLV. The third person was Patricia Navarro Velez, a beloved professor who was tragically killed on our campus by a gunman on Dec 6, 2023. In accordance with the Nevada System of Higher Education policy, UNLV is committed to and will provide equality of educational and employment opportunity for all persons regardless of race, sex, age, color, national origin, religion, disability, sexual orientation, gender, genetic information, pregnancy, or veteran status. We cannot comment further due to the ongoing investigation,” said the UNLV pussies in the release.

And, yeah, this really fucking happened. The fact that they targeted the other two professors who moved on makes this slightly less dark and fucked up. Slightly. Maybe like 1 percent less.

The fat demented old fuck also claimed that attacks on Tesla dealerships are acts of domestic terrorism funded by Soros or whoever the idiot thinks is behind it.

The Trump Administration on Tuesday released Not the Epstein Files, a trove of data on the investigations into a crime surrounded by myths and conspiracy theories. The non-Jeffrey Epstein files concern the uncle of a current Trump cabinet member who is big on using horse paste.

As foretold in their Monday reporting, Axios now confirms that the Trump Regime have gone ahead and severely curtailed the phone service options available to Social Security recipients, dooming perhaps millions to getting fucked out of benefits by default. Give it maybe two or three weeks and members of Congress – Republicans in particular – will be in full freak-the-fuck out mode as they’re flooded with complaints from constituents wondering where their money is.

Jeez, what a nice looking family and loving, if kind of pale and creepy dad, now-former Minnesota state Senator Senator Justin Eichorn seems to be… Well actually books and covers, you know.

CBP agents stationed at the southern border confiscated 3,768 poultry-related products, mostly eggs, to 352 instances of fentanyl being interdicted, the New York Post reports.

Egg smuggling attempts are up 36 percent since October compared to prior years overall across the entire stretch of the southern border, but in certain areas the increase is much higher: In parts of Texas, 54 percent up, while in San Diego they’ve more than doubled.

The group of Republican Minnesota state senators who on Monday introduced a bill amending the state’s code on mental illnesses to include Trump Derangement Syndrome have tragically lost one of theirs to a case of soliciting a minor for sex after he was arrested while attempting to meet up with a Bloomington Police detective he thought was a 16 year-old girl, the Minneapolis Star-Tribune reports on a sad case of Republicans remaining all-too-true to their incompetent predatory brand.

The headline of the story says Senator Justin Eichorn is “to resign after” the sting arrest but since he’s still in jail after getting cuffed Monday evening he probably can’t get anyone to forward a resignation letter to the chamber. As for why he’s still in jail who the hell knows but it could very well be that his wife doesn’t feel like putting up their house as bond given the present situation.

There are several very obvious takeaways from this People Magazine story of a torrid, long-distance love affair between Las Vegas woman Victoria Goodwin and incarcerated Florida multiple murderer Grant Amato that got serious earlier this month after both were charged with plotting to hire a hitman to murder Goodwin’s husband, Aaron, star of Ghost Adventure, which airs on who cares what the hell stupid basic cable channel it is. Probably “Destination America” or one of those. Anyway, here are some key points People failed to remit to their audience of celeb-tainment consumers:

👻 In plotting with Amato so that they could “be together,” despite Amato, 35 – serving life in a Florida prison for the 2019 triple murder of his parents and brother after they discovered he’d pissed away $200,000 of their money on a “relationship” with a Bulgarian cam girl – Victoria, 32, made it plain that a bald, porn-addicted incel who would kill his family and she cannot and will not ever have any physical contact with was somehow less embarrassing for her than being married to Aaron, 48, a “ghost hunter” who has starred on the show for like 20-plus years. Not the best look for Aaron.

👻 If it wasn’t clear enough from Victoria’s texts to Amato – saying shit like “I’m so anxious LOLOL,” on the day he was supposed to be killed – that she doesn’t respect Aaron or his career, just keep in mind that ghosts are supposed to be vengeful spirits from the afterlife and that by having him murdered she was unconcerned with the possibility that Aaron’s incorporeal soul would haunt her.

👻 Victoria “began to text Amato in March 2024 after seeing him in the docuseries Ctrl + Alt + Desire,” which airs on Paramount+, People writes, citing the Las Vegas Metro Police Department’s arrest report. No info is provided on how Amato had access to a phone, let alone how Victoria got his number. Still that unexplained plot point raises the intriguing possibility that was the same way she met Aaron several years ago, and when she wasn’t so impressed anymore with a fucking “ghost hunter” she’d seen on streaming TV she started fangirling for a porn-addicted sociopath.

😂😂😂😂nope 🖕 https://t.co/X5uthKdRpC

— Catturd ™ (@catturd2) March 18, 2025

Spandex-wearing grapple freak Jim Jordan on Tuesday sent letters requesting transcribed interviews with the federal prosecutors who worked cases concerning convicted felon President Trump, former First Son Hunter Biden, loser Republican former Congressman Jeff Fortenberry, various Capitol rioters and others in some lame new effort to make it look like Jordan is actually working and not just jerking himself off. His act is wearing thin even for some of the fanboys.

In what are hopefully the first rumblings of a palace coup against unhinged asshole Elon Musk, one of Tesla’s earliest backers, hedge fund bro Ross Gerber, called on Leon to step down as CEO of the Tesla fire of a company, citing all the MAGA and DOGE bullshit over the last few months.

“I think Tesla needs a new CEO and I decided today I was going to start saying it and so this is the first show that I’m saying it on. It’s time for somebody to run Tesla,” Gerber, president and CEO of California-based Gerber Kawasaki Wealth and Investment Management, told Sky News. “The business has been neglected for too long. There are too many important things Tesla is doing, so either Elon should come back to Tesla and be the CEO of Tesla and give up his other jobs or he should focus on the government and keep doing what he is doing but find a suitable CEO of Tesla.”

Emphasizing that the DOGE circlejerk was “absolutely” diminishing the brand, Gerber said “The company’s reputation has just been destroyed by Elon Musk. Sales are plummeting so, yeh, it’s a crisis. You literally can’t sell the best product in the market place because the CEO is so divisive.”

“(((Ross Gerber))) can go FUCK HIMSELF IN THE FACE… After I chainsaw it,” Musk will tweet soon.

White House readout of Trump-Putin call: “Today, President Trump and President Putin spoke about the need for peace and a ceasefire in the Ukraine war. Both leaders agreed this conflict needs to end with a lasting peace. They also stressed the need for improved bilateral relations between the United States and Russia. The blood and treasure that both Ukraine and Russia have been spending in this war would be better spent on the needs of their people. This conflict should never have started and should have been ended long ago with sincere and good faith peace efforts. The leaders agreed that the movement to peace will begin with an energy and infrastructure ceasefire, as well as technical negotiations on implementation of a maritime ceasefire in the Black Sea, full ceasefire and permanent peace. These negotiations will begin immediately in the Middle East. The leaders spoke broadly about the Middle East as a region of potential cooperation to prevent future conflicts. They further discussed the need to stop proliferation of strategic weapons and will engage with others to ensure the broadest possible application. The two leaders shared the view that Iran should never be in a position to destroy Israel. The two leaders agreed that a future with an improved bilateral relationship between the United States and Russia has huge upside. This includes enormous economic deals and geopolitical stability when peace has been achieved”

Kremlin readout of Trump-Putin call: “Putin informed Trump that on Wednesday, Russia and Ukraine will conduct a prisoner exchange following a 175-for-175 formula Putin told Trump that Ukraine must halt mobilization and the rearmament of its Armed Forces in the event of a ceasefire. The key conditions for preventing escalation should be the complete cessation of foreign military aid and the provision of intelligence to Kyiv. Russia will continue massing troops near Ukraine’s borders.”

In an article for some reason written like this is supposed to be a flex and that she’s “over the target” or some shit, Fox News reports that White House Press Secretary Karoline “Blondi” Leavitt has in under two months already hit an achievement one of her predecessors, Jen Psaki, didn’t even reach in two years: Full blown fact-check articles on Politifact, for which Leavitt has three to Psaski’s two.

“Karoline Leavitt has already surpassed one of her Biden predecessors in total number of PolitiFact fact-checks after just two months in office. On Thursday, PolitiFact issued Leavitt her latest fact-check over her statement, ‘Tariffs are a tax cut for the American people.’ PolitiFact rated it ‘False’ with chief correspondent Louis Jacobson writing that ‘virtually all economists’ have characterized tariffs as ‘tax hikes rather than tax cuts.’ This marked Leavitt’s third PolitiFact fact-check since beginning her tenure as press secretary in January, which officially put her ahead of former Biden press secretary Jen Psaki’s entire record of fact-checks on the site,” Fox writes as if this were a real achievement. It’s not even clear how it’s an “owning the libtards” achievement.