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Convicted felon President Trump’s DOJ is trying to get former FBI Director James Comey’s defense lawyer, former prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald, removed from the bullshit “case” against him, Politico reports citing a Sunday night motion filed by the prosecution claiming that Fitzgerald was party to some of the 2017 communications to the media that Comey supposedly lied about in 2020.

“Based on publicly disclosed information, the defendant used current lead defense counsel to improperly disclose classified information,” prosecutors Tyler Lemons and Gabriel Diaz wrote. “This fact raises a question of conflict and disqualification for current lead defense counsel.”

Lloyd’s Bank, Snapchat, Duolingo, Zoom, Roblox, and a shit ton of other major apps have all been impacted by a sudden upstream crash in Amazon Web Services cloud APIs, the BBC reports.

Republican Vermont state Senator Sam Douglass, a 27 year-old man and not a “college” kid like JD Vance claimed last week, announced his resignation Friday, effective Monday, following the leak of a group chat of national Young Republicans in which the participants had expressed their love for Adolf Hitler, rape, racial slurs, genocide, and in general checked a lot of boxes of how the GOP is perceived by libs, SevenDaysVT reports. In the thread, leaked to Politico last week by extreme cultist former New York City Young Republicans chair-turned-Trump Regime official Gavin Wax, Douglass wrote “She just didn’t bathe often,” in reply to another user who had badmouthed a “very obese Indian woman,” known to them. In another exchange, Douglass mentioned a procedural error by a Jewish colleague to which his wife, Brianna Douglass, also in the chat group, wrote “I was about to say you’re giving nationals [too] much credit and expecting the Jew to be honest.”

Douglass, once seen as an up-and-comer in the Green Mountain State’s GOP, had initially resisted calls to hang it up but once the state party and Governor Phil Scott – who’s basically a Democrat anyway – stepped in, the neckbearded state legislator caved, writing “if my Governor asks me to do something, I will act, because I believe in what he’s trying to do for Vermont,” in his announcement.

That part came after when Douglass tried to minimize what he had personally wrote in the group chat which, on balance, was not as bad as the lines about “watermelon people” and the pro-rape “jokes.” Obviously if Sam had written something antisemitic about the Jewish person that would’ve been printed verbatim along with his wife’s response. And the “She just didn’t bathe often” – the sole message from him in the coverage of the chat group – doesn’t in and of itself scream racism as he could’ve said the same thing if this person had been named. But that Douglass never wrote “You guys are fucking sick and this is exactly why the libtards call Republicans hateful, racist freaks,” and left the chat the first time someone posted a slur – let alone apologize for his wife and announce he was looking to get her into therapy – says far more than a single five-word message could have.

“On October 13, 2025, at approximately 4:11 pm, Georgia State Troopers from Post 32 in Athens responded to a six-vehicle crash on Interstate 85 northbound, just south of mile marker 147 in Commerce, GA. The investigation revealed that a semi-trailer was following too closely and struck the rear of a 2014 Dodge Grand Caravan. This caused a chain reaction involving the van and four additional vehicles. After impact, the van became engulfed in flames along with the tractor-trailer.”

“Jeff Rogers, Jackson County Deputy Coroner, has confirmed there were eight occupants deceased in the van. The identities of the eight occupants, including three adults and five juveniles, has not yet been confirmed. There is a possibility of one adult being pregnant, but this will not be confirmed until an autopsy has been completed. The driver has been identified as Kane Aaron Hammock, a 33-year-old male from Gainesville, GA. He has been arrested and charged with eight counts of Vehicular Homicide (2nd degree), one count of Feticide by Vehicle (2nd degree), one count of Following Too Closely, one count of No Registration, and one count of Driver to Exercise Due Care,” said the Georgia Department of Public Safety in a press release about the crimes of trucking-themed country music small-timer Kane Hammock who, to reiterate, killed five children, three adults, and one unborn fetus due to what law enforcement says was reckless abandon behind the wheel of his rig.

Speaker Mike Johnson headlines this Sunday morning roundup of interview clips as America enters week three of this self-inflicted extra clusterfuck on top of the usual clusterfuck. Johnson’s disappointment at there being no real “action” during Saturday’s nationwide No Kings protests was palpable but missing was any indication that he understands that all his “terrorist” shit-talk in the lead-up might’ve kind of backfired though the immutable universal law of the Streisand Effect.

“President Gustavo Petro, of Columbia, is an illegal drug leader strongly encouraging the massive production of drugs, in big and small fields, all over Columbia. It has become the biggest business in Columbia, by far, and Petro does nothing to stop it, despite large scale payments and subsidies from the USA that are nothing more than a long term rip off of America. AS OF TODAY, THESE PAYMENTS, OR ANY OTHER FORM OF PAYMENT, OR SUBSIDIES, WILL NO LONGER BE MADE TO COLUMBIA. The purpose of this drug production is the sale of massive amounts of product into the United States, causing death, destruction, and havoc. Petro, a low rated and very unpopular leader, with a fresh mouth toward America, better close up these killing fields immediately, or the United States will close them up for him, and it won’t be done nicely,” posted the big baby on Sunday.

Not for nothing but isn’t cocaine typically responsible for far fewer deaths than opioids?

Approximately zero protestors, bystanders, National Guard troops, or law enforcement were killed let alone injured in any of the more than 2,700 No Kings protests that took place nationwide on Saturday, according to an NBC News summary that makes no mention of any such issues.

In fact is doesn’t even say if any of the estimated 7 million protestors was arrested. Thus unsurprisingly the claims by Republicans that there would be violence from the “pro-terrorist, Hamas-linked” demonstrators against convicted felon President Trump’s regime were bullshit.

Trump and then the White House on Saturday posted AI slop of “King Trump” flying a fighter jet and dropping massive blobs of brown slop – pretty obviously meant to be shit – on the protests

“It was my great honor to destroy a very large DRUG-CARRYING SUBMARINE that was navigating towards the United States on a well known narcotrafficking transit route. US Intelligence confirmed this vessel was loaded up with mostly Fentanyl, and other illegal narcotics. There were four known narcoterrorists on board the vessel. Two of the terrorists were killed. At least 25,000 Americans would die if I allowed this submarine to come ashore. The two surviving terrorists are being returned to their Countries of origin, Ecuador and Colombia, for detention and prosecution. No US Forces were harmed in this strike. Under my watch, the United States of America will not tolerate narcoterrorists trafficking illegal drugs, by land or by sea,” posted the Orange Tyrant on Saturday.

A Florida McDonald’s worker has been charged in the shooting of a teenage customer who had become extra value belligerent when staff at a Davenport location refused him and a friend service due to high demand for the global brand’s McProcessed consumables last weekend, WFLA reports.

Peter Story, 19, and Nicholas Jones, 18, had arrived at the drive-thru at 3 AM on Sunday the 12th only to be told by McEmployee Yoan Soto, 21, that the McKitchen was maxed out and simply could not fulfill their order. Per cops, Story and Jones then threatened to “beat [Soto’s] ass,” and would be waiting for him in the McParking lot. The two then parked and entered the McDonald’s to continue their McTirade. The manager then told Story to leave and they refused, later telling cops she heard them mentioning a “30 clip” and “switches” amid their McShittalk. It was those specific words that prompted Soto to go to the break room to retrieve a special McSomething from his backpack, circle around to the front door and, as the time-honored Florida saying goes, stand his ground.

Story was shot in the neck during the ensuing McStruggle, but not like Charlie Kirk shot in the neck, as he and Jones fled the scene. Soto retrieved the McShell casing and absconded from however much longer was left in his shift. Although the lede here said Soto was charged in the McShooting, it’s not even close to an attempted murder case as the probably-former McEmployee faces a count of tampering with physical evidence for removing the shell casing from the scene. Story and Jones were charged with disorderly McConduct and trespassing for being such pains in the neck.

“George Santos was somewhat of a ‘rogue,’ but there are many rogues throughout our Country that aren’t forced to serve seven years in prison. I started to think about George when the subject of Democrat Senator Richard ‘Da Nang Dick’ Blumenthal came up again. As everyone remembers, ‘Da Nang’ stated for almost twenty years that he was a proud Vietnam Veteran, having endured the worst of the War, watching the Wounded and Dead as he raced up the hills and down the valleys, blood streaming from his face. He was ‘a Great Hero,’ he would leak to any and all who would listen.”

“And then it happened! He was a COMPLETE AND TOTAL FRAUD. He never went to Vietnam, he never saw Vietnam, he never experienced the Battles there, or anywhere else. His War Hero status, and even minimal service in our Military, was totally and completely MADE UP. This is far worse than what George Santos did, and at least Santos had the Courage, Conviction, and Intelligence to ALWAYS VOTE REPUBLICAN! George has been in solitary confinement for long stretches of time and, by all accounts, has been horribly mistreated. Therefore, I just signed a Commutation, releasing George Santos from prison, IMMEDIATELY. Good luck George, have a great life!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Friday, launching George’s big comeback into politics and justifying with Senator Dickhead Blumenthal’s Stolen Valor. Two wrongs make a right in 2025 MAGAmerica.

Several Republican members’ offices earlier this year each received an American flag with an “optical illusion” Nazi Swastika embedded in it, NBC News reported Thursday in what might be one of the most limp dick damage control stories ever concocted by this utterly dysfunctional party.

Or maybe just this week. “One of the sources, whose office received a flag back in January, said it was initially difficult to see the flag’s swastika with the naked eye, calling it an ‘optical illusion.’ But once they discovered the swastika in the center of the flag, they threw it out, the source said,” NBC News writes in the second and third of the just five sentences in the entire 19-sentence-long article to relate to these spectral US-Nazi Germany mashup flags. The others mention that the flags’ provenance is still unclear and that the US Capitol Police and House Administration Committee are investigating. The rest is the context in which and the sole reason why this article was printed.

Give NBC’s reporter a pass here. Access journalism requires eating some bullshit from time to time in order to maintain working relationships with sources. Plus article itself draws no direct connection between the mysterious January flags and the swastika seen on the cubicle of Angelo Elia, one of Ohio Republican Congressman Dave Taylor’s staffers, during a web meeting earlier this week.

It mentions it prominently – in fact there’s more about that one than the “optical illusion” flags. The reporter played along with some half-assed effort to introduce doubt in the minds of people who do not want to believe their party is the one on display in those texts between Young GOP leaders.

Former Southern District of Florida US Attorney Alex Acosta told House Oversight Committee investigators he was too chickenshit to try to win at trial against Dersh and Ken Starr so he struck that cowardly 2008 plea deal with sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, the New York Post reports.

“Ultimately, the trial was a crapshoot, and we just wanted the guy to go to jail,” Acosta told the members of the committee, even though Epstein kind of didn’t really go to jail at all. “We put him in jail, he registered as a sex offender, and the victims had an opportunity to recover. And that was a win. Looking at all of this, the ultimate judgment was, ‘Do you roll the dice?’ and if he gets away with it, you’re sending a signal to the community that he can get away with it,” the pussy continued.

“A billionaire going to jail sends a strong signal to the community that this is not acceptable, that this is not right, that this cannot happen. His registering as a sex offender puts the world on notice, whether the world listened or not we can put to one side, but it puts the world on notice that he was an offender and a sexual offender,” Acosta continued and holy fuck, forget that he sent the opposite signal, but recall that Acosta served as Trump’s Labor Secretary and resigned in 2019 specifically because of new reporting on his Epstein failures after Dirty Jeff was indicted again.

The Clerk of the House of Representatives of Friday read Speaker Mike Johnson’s proclamation of “I hereby designate the period from Monday October 20, 2025 through Sunday October 26, 2025 as a district work period,” there by extending the vacation for his members another week.

The joke isn’t funny, but here goes with the punchline anyway: WSB-TV reports that the three white cops from the Clover, South Carolina Police Department – all in uniform – were given their meals for free at Christianity-themed fast food chicken chain Chick-fil-A’s Augusta, Georgia location but then the Black cop – wearing the same uniform as the white ones – was charged for his order.

Wait, there’s a punchier line: After Clover Police Sgt Tracey Reid wrote to Chick-fil-A to complain he was given two free meal vouchers as recompense. “We came in together, same uniform, stood in line, there was never a time we were not together while standing in line,” Reid told WSB of the incident that occurred last month while the four were in Augusta for an unspecified work function.

“He said he had to pay for his meal, and it infuriated me,” said Detective Thomas Barnette. “And I said, ‘You want me to go say something?’ He was like, ‘No, I don’t want you to cause a scene,’ but I could tell the way he looked; he just looked at his plate, he looked sad and humiliated and that made me really mad.” The gift cards and the response made it worse. “It said it was perceived that it was a racial incident, which I didn’t like, because it wasn’t perceived, it actually happened,” Reid said.

In a statement the franchisee said she regrets “the unintentional impact this incident had and sincerely apologize to our Guest. We were deeply concerned by this claim. It appears to have been an honest oversight across separate lines and registers. We are strongly committed to supporting our community’s first responders.” Man this joke sucks. Especially the part in the original response in which, per WSB, the owner wrote that “the person who processed the meal was a team leader who doesn’t normally work at the register, and the manager called the incident a mistake.”

A top Italian investigative journalist is very much not dead after a mistimed bomb placed by a mafia operative exploded about 20 minutes too late to kill or at least grievously maim him, Reuters reports.

Sigfrido Ranucci, host of state broadcaster RAI’s weekly “Report” show, has been under police protection for years because of his dogged persistence in covering the country’s underworld. The bomb, planted outside of his home about 20 km south of Rome damaged two cars in his driveway.

Or at least that’s what Ranucci told the cops. It’s possible he owes the mafia a shit ton of money on a racing bet from 1999 and then hastily slapped together some reporting to make it look like he was this fearless clarion of truth against the criminal scum. Maybe the mafia guys even kind of like the coverage but still want him dead over the €50,000 he bet on Taormina Triumph way back when.

Venting to Axios over Jesus Dork Speaker Mike Johnson bitching out of answering questions about scumbag domestic abuser/stealth Muslim Florida MAGA Congressman Cory Mills, white nationalist Georgia Congresswoman Marjie Greene was, characteristically, less than sparing in her rage.

“They expelled George Santos, Mike Johnson did. He was Speaker and oversaw George Santos being expelled. Why isn’t he doing anything about Cory Mills?” Greene told Axios. “There’s clearly proof behind her accusations that a judge is issuing a restraining order. So I would say to Speaker Johnson, this is a serious matter, and it needs to be taken seriously,” she continued, aiming directly at Johnson telling reporters he’d prefer to “talk about something serious,” on Thursday when he was asked about the protective order a Florida judge slapped Mills with this week.

Mills had harassed his ex-Florida girlfriend, GOP delegate/beauty pageant queen Lindsey Langston, threatening her with revenge porn following her breakup prompted by Mills being credibly accused of assaulting his (reportedly)still-DC girlfriend, Iranians for Trump co-founder Sarah Raviani.

Worth noting is that Johnson was very much against expelling George Santos. Greene also voted no.