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Laura Loomer is telling our mutual friends that her “intimate relationship” with the President led to “the best blowjob of his life.” His words, according to Laura.

— MILO (@Nero) September 14, 2024

Seems this got a little lost on the mix over the weekend, but Milo’s so back. In a lengthy article he claims that Loomer’s dad Jeff tearfully “declined to say over the phone whether he was currently considering another involuntary psychiatric hold for his daughter, given her bizarre claim this week that she has been performing oral sex on President Trump, but did not rule it out.”

“The Rhetoric, Lies, as exemplified by the false statements made by Comrade Kamala Harris during the rigged and highly partisan ABC Debate, and all of the ridiculous lawsuits specifically designed to inflict damage on Joe’s, then Kamala’s, Political Opponent, ME, has taken politics in our Country to a whole new level of Hatred, Abuse, and Distrust. Because of this Communist Left Rhetoric, the bullets are flying, and it will only get worse! Allowing millions of people, from places unknown, to INVADE and take over our Country, is an unpardonable sin. OUR BORDERS MUST BE CLOSED, AND THE TERRORISTS, CRIMINALS, AND MENTALLY INSANE, IMMEDIATELY REMOVED FROM AMERICAN CITIES AND TOWNS, DEPORTED BACK TO THEIR COUNTIES OF ORIGIN. WE WANT PEOPLE TO COME INTO OUR COUNTRY, BUT THEY MUST LOVE OUR NATION, AND COME IN LEGALLY AND THROUGH A SYSTEM OF MERIT. THE WORLD IS LAUGHING AT US AS FOOLS, THEY ARE STEALING OUR JOBS AND OUR WEALTH. WE CANNOT LET THEM LAUGH ANY LONGER. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Monday afternoon.

So yeah, we’re not really going to be sympathetic to this angry old freak who insists on inciting acts of terrorism – like two elementary schools getting evacuated over bomb threats, a whole college is closed for the week, and it’s also quite possible there have been acts of arson committed – but cries victim when two weirdos in under three months try to kill him. Really just fuck him, who cares, and we’re not even going to dignify the second attempt with any coverage of the criminal proceedings.

Two Springfield, Ohio elementary schools were evacuated due to bomb threats on Monday, again, this time the Simon Kenton Elementary School and Kenwood Elementary School, WHIO reports.

The two are different from the pair that were threatened last week amid the continued threat of violence propagated by convicted felon former President Trump and running mate JD Vance. A bomb threat was also reportedly called in to the Ohio State House in Columbus on Monday morning.

In more related news, the city of Springfield on Monday announced they were canceling their annual CultureFest “in light of recent threats and safety concerns… The decision was made with the utmost consideration for the safety and well-being of our community and event participants. CultureFest, scheduled for September 27-28, is an event that celebrates diversity, arts and local culture. City officials, in consultation with local and state law enforcement, determined that canceling the event is the most responsible course of action to prevent any potential risks to attendees, staff, vendors and volunteers.” Probably the smart move since MAGA terrorists love them some soft targets to aim at.

Convicted felon former President Trump on Monday told Fox News that President Joe Biden and Kamala Harris are to blame for two assassination attempts in three months, saying Sunday’s shooter Ryan Routh “believed the rhetoric of Biden and Harris, and he acted on it… Their rhetoric is causing me to be shot at, when I am the one who is going to save the country, and they are the ones that are destroying the country – both from the inside and out.” Irony is as dead as Thomas Crooks.

Trump called Biden and Harris out for defining him as a “threat to democracy,” while telling Americans they are “unity” leaders. “They are the opposite. These are people that want to destroy our country. It is called the enemy from within. They are the real threat,” Trump continued.

“They use highly inflammatory language,” he said. “I can use it too – far better than they can – but I don’t.” Fox News did not note that the shooting attempt came a few hours after he had posted “THE FAILING NEW YORK TIMES IS A TRUE THREAT TO DEMOCRACY!” on Truth Social.

The fat bastard also squeezed in some complaining about the media, saying “The media is made up of fools that will spew [Democrats’] garbage and spew their sick philosophies and will protect them at all costs, and they can’t believe they get away with it. Democrats are totally protected by the media,” and last week’s ABC News debate “was so biased and so out of control… Harris was the one lying about Project 2025, she lied about abortion, she lied about everything. She was correcting me.”

Pennsylvania MAGA Congressman Dan Meuser on Monday told batshit Fox News idiot Maria Bartiromo that the House GOP are planning to hold a hearing about “collusion” between Vice President Kamala Harris’s campaign and ABC News to rig last week’s debate against convicted felon former President Trump. If you’re getting lost following what this assclown is saying about the “whistleblower,” well you’re in luck as a copy of their “affidavit” is going around MAGA Twitter.

Soon-to-be-divorced philanderer House Homeland Security Committee Chairman Mark Green’s daughter Catherine Green tells the Nashville Banner that she became aware of her dad’s affair with an unidentified 32 year-old woman last fall, saying that it had been “over the last year and a half, two years, we’ve really noticed a difference in” the Congressman. “So who knows if that’s just the toxic environment that is DC, but something has changed. We’ve all had to basically grieve the loss of the person that we thought was our father,” adding that Mark “sells himself in politics as being a Christian, conservative family man. His actions in the last, whatever, year have not been that.”

Asked if she thought convicted felon former President Trump’s example had anything to do with Mark Green acting like him, Catherine said “Yes and no. Trump doesn’t lie about who he is, you know, he’s upfront with you. You know he’s an ass, but he’s just good at what he does. He’s a good businessman,” she said making it clear she’s one of those dipshits that lies to herself about Donald.

The Banner writes that in their first exchanges with Mark’s future-ex-wife Camilla’s “emotionally charged text described the other woman as a ‘predator’ and misidentified her as an employee at a political news outlet. Later, an unnamed woman who works in politics told Politico she had an affair with the congressman and Camilla admitted to flubbing the woman’s employer in the text. When the Banner tried to reach Camilla, the couple’s adult daughter confirmed her mother’s mistake,” making it clear Camilla had indeed misidentified Axios in the text. Our best guess is that she actually meant Axiom Strategies, the Republican campaign consulting shop run by big time operative Jeff Roe, who was excommunicated from Trump’s crew for working with Ron DeSantis during the primary season.

“Plaintiff Rudolph Giuliani sued President Biden and several affiliated entities for defamation and false light invasion of privacy based on statements Biden allegedly made during a presidential debate in Nashville, Tennessee. The defendants have filed a motion to dismiss contending, among other things, that the complaint must be dismissed for lack of personal jurisdiction.”

“Giuliani has failed to object to the motion. When personal jurisdiction is challenged, the plaintiff ‘must carry the burden of showing that personal jurisdiction is both statutorily authorized and consistent with the constitutional requirements of due process.’ For the reasons set forth in the defendants’ memorandum, Giuliani has utterly failed to carry this burden. Accordingly, I grant the defendants’ motion to dismiss without prejudice to the plaintiff’s right to refile the complaint in a court that has jurisdiction over the defendants,” wrote New Hampshire Circuit Court Judge Paul J Barbadoro, spiking the alcoholic shitbrain’s defamation lawsuit against President Biden.

In an absolutely gutwrenching new report, ProPublica describes the agonizing final hours of Amber Nicole Thurman, a 28 year-old single mom who in July 2022 was suffering from a rare complication from having taken an abortion pill. Stricken with an infection, already in the hospital, Thurman was denied a routine procedure called a dilation and curettage simply because weeks earlier Republican Governor Brian Kemp – fresh off the Supreme Court overturning Roe v Wade – had signed a law making performing it a felony with very few exceptions. And when the doctors and nurses had decided the exceptions applied it was already too late. It took two years for this to become public due to red tape, and ProPublica says they’ve found at least one other case of a preventable death from around same time – meaning that Thurman’s death is almost certainly the tip of the iceberg.

Kamala Harris shouldn’t bring Thurman’s family on stage during a rally in Georgia, nor should she sign a pic of the dead woman and sign it “I love you” while spelling her name wrong. Liberals should not start a “#SayHerName” social media blitz. Just simple facts about the consequences of Republican misrule – a little boy having to grow up without his mom – clearly and calmly stated.

“Go ahead media. Keep up the rhetoric.  And when you get what you want don’t be surprised of the consequences.  CV2 will be a reality.”–the top comment by “gman”–who obviously isn’t–at Breitbart as they convince themselves that a man who voted for Trump in 2016 will stoke the next “CV,” whatever the hell that is.

Republican Kentucky state Senator Johnnie L Turner was airlifted to University of Tennessee Medical Center in Knoxville on Sunday night after driving his ride-on lawnmower into the deep end of an empty swimming pool, WMYT reports citing State Trooper Shane Jacobs, who responded to the scene at Turner’s home in the Sukey Ridge area of Harlan County in the southeast of Kentucky.

It’s not clear yet if alcohol was involved in the incident that occurred at approximately 7:30 PM on Sunday. Turner is reportedly in stable condition medically but a 76 year-old man on a ride-on mower at dusk close enough to a swimming pool where he can fall in probably isn’t all that “stable.”

Possessing in spades the wit and competence sorely lacking in current House Oversight Committee chairmain James Comer, Ranking Member Jamie Raskin is eyeing an ambitious agenda should Democrats take the House majority, putting on his list rigorous investigations relating to gun control, climate change, and Supreme Court ethics issues, as well as pursuing Trump-focused investigations, including the business dealings of convicted felon former President Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner and Trump’s own business operations when he was president, all with the objective of convincing the public of the need to write and pass relevant legislation, Axios reports.

Their story goes on to mention that would-be Speaker Hakeem Jeffries will give Raskin pretty much unlimited independence, as if Raskin somehow has a reputation as a loose cannon or a fucking idiot like Comer and it needs to be spelled out. Toward the end however it is stressed that neither Raskin nor Jeffries are not “counting any chickens before they hatch” and it’s important to actually win the majority before they start making any real plans about what to do with it.

Since apparently @realDonaldTrump schedule wasn’t public how did the shooter know to be at the golf course?

— Tim Burchett (@timburchett) September 16, 2024

Hmmm… Interesting question posed here by Tennessee MAGA Congressman Tim Burchett, famous for admitting he doesn’t want to do anything about gun control after three elementary school kids were slaughtered in his state last year. How could this guy have known that Trump would be on the golf course in Palm Beach if it wasn’t on his public schedule? We can probably start with that the schedule was completely empty and that with 51 days to go before the election, attempted assassin Ryan Routh, knew that Trump was not in the swing states but at one of his homes. Posting “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!” randomly at 10:44 AM on Sunday also may have served as a hint that he was not busy with any other campaign-related activity. There’s also that the movements of “Trump Force One” are publicly searchable on air traffic tracking websites, so Routh knew that if not Trump himself but his plane was in the Palm Beach area. From here we have to speculate, but it’s extremely unlikely to turn out that Routh had acquired the Orange God Emperor’s whereabouts by any means other than simply observing his motorcade leaving Mar-a-Lago, arriving at the golf course, or both.

It’s hard to see it as being much more sophisticated than that. The fat, lazy bastard was not out on the road trying to recapture the White House, but dicking around on social media before making his way to a round of golf with one of his billionaire buddies and a maniac found him.

Sources on convicted felon former President Trump’s campaign tell NBC News’s Jake Traylor the fat bastard will “soon” be visiting Springfield, Ohio, the epicenter of their latest white nationalist fearmongering push over false stories of Haitian migrants eating dogs, cats, and waterfowl.

What an actual visit would look like is anyone’s guess and it’s hard to see Trump or his Mike Pence replacement meeting with Haitian community leaders. Republican Mayor Rob Rue probably isn’t going to be welcoming them, as on Sunday he told Politico he’s “tired and angry” over this shit.

“Any political leader that takes the national stage and has the national spotlight needs to understand the gravity of the words that they have for cities like ours, and what they say impacts our city. And we’ve had bomb threats the last two days. We’ve had personal threats the last two days, and it’s increasing, because the national stage is swirling this up. Springfield, Ohio, is caught in a political vortex, and it is a bit out of control. We are a wonderful city – a beautiful town. And for what it’s worth, your pets are safe in Springfield, Ohio,” said Rue, adding he’s “frustrated” with Donald.

Asked if he was going to vote for Trump, Rue said he’s “probably not going to answer that question.”

The March 12th, 2023 television broadcast of the 96th Academy Awards, the ceremony gala both colloquially known and officially billed by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences as “The Oscars,” on Sunday beat out competition that included the June 11th, 2023 broadcast of the 76th Annual Antoinette Perry Award for Excellence in Broadway Theatre (known as the “Tony”) Awards and the February 4th, 2024 broadcast of the 66th Grammy Awards (no “official” name) to win the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences’s award (known as the “Emmy”) for “Outstanding Variety Special (Live).” It was the first win for the Oscars in the category but at least the 18th Emmy for the annual film industry awards show, past wins including “Outstanding Directing for a Variety Special” and “Outstanding Writing for a Variety Special” out of at least 54 nominations in various categories.

Other nominees in the “Outstanding Variety Special (Live)” included non-awards shows such as “The Apple Music Super Bowl LVIII Halftime Show Starring Usher” and “The Greatest Roast Of All Time: Tom Brady.” The 76th Annual Tony Awards broadcast did not go home empty handed as the awards show took the other awards show’s prize for “Outstanding Choreography For Variety Or Reality Programming – 2024.” The 66th Grammy Awards was shut out at the 76th Emmy Awards however.

And we’re not saying the American entertainment media industry is an incestuous, self-indulgent circlejerk, we’re just reporting that two of its top awards shows won at another top awards show.

Ryan Routh, the former Trump fan-turned Tulsi Gabbard fan (?) who attempted to assassinate convicted felon former President Trump at his golf course on Sunday appeared in a propaganda video for the Ukrainian Nazi extremist militia Azov Battalion in 2022 reposted by Pizzagate asshole Jack Posobiec and others in the hardcore MAGA influencer community… which according to Laura Loomer makes Routh a CIA asset by association because of some real or imagined connection to the white nationalist paramilitary group who had fought in an insurgency in occupied eastern Ukraine since 2014. The Nazi symbolism used in Azov Battalion’s flags and propaganda was used by the Kremlin and their allies here in the US as a justification for the 2022 invasion, that Russia attacked to purge Ukraine of “Nazis” – when the reality was the Azovs have never numbered more than 2,000.

Anyway, former neighbors in Greensboro, North Carolina describe Routh as a complete weirdo, with a woman who lived next door to him before he moved to Hawaii last year telling WGHP “I mean, trying to shoot Trump. That’s a lot. I would have never guessed, and I would have swore up and down, no, that’s not him… I just can’t believe it. I mean, if I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I mean the pictures and stuff and all, then I wouldn’t be able to believe that.” The unnamed neighbor added that Routh kept a shit ton of guns in his home, saying “I’ve seen the guns myself and all, and, yeah, they had a lot of guns and stuff over there, and, yeah, a lot of people were afraid of him back in the day.”

Wisconsin clerks print ballots even as RFK Jr. sues to get his name off them https://t.co/kk06FqFgRq pic.twitter.com/4CmV8PAbaJ

— New York Post (@nypost) September 16, 2024

“Trumps Lead Over Harris Will Go UP Even Farther Now,” Newsmax commenter MaxinesMugshot replies to the story of the apparent assassination attempt of the Republican rapist and nominee Donald Trump at his Palm Beach golf club.  Poor Maxine doesn’t realize Trump lost his lead about a week after the Butler ear wing; there was no bandage bump.

“How misleading can you get? I mean honestly. ‘Shots Fired at Trump Property Near Donald Trump: Everything We Know,’ top commenter lazlo covax posts confidently at Newsweek.  “Two people reportedly exchanged gunfire outside of Trump’s golf course and the shots were targeted at each other, NOT TRUMP!!!!”  Although that’s not what officials are sharing about a Secret Service event outside Trump’s Palm Beach golf course.

After someone reportedly took a shot at a fat man on a golf course in Florida, an obviously foreign commenter boti reminded the hundreds of people who read the comments on Yahoo! that other countries, including his unspecified one, are far more peaceful and less violent:  “I love my country. To go to office our President rides his bike from home to the train station, has a chat on the way with some neighbours. After the train lands in the capital city, he first takes the tram and then walks the last 100 meters to the office. This doesn’t make my country a better one, but certainly more enjoyable.”

“A cabal of psychopathic killers wish to take over the world – standing in their way Donald Trump next president of these United States. Being psychopathic they have no empathy for whomever is killed, be it one or millions or billions. CoVID vax anyone?  These are the powers of darkness and evil,” Roco at Infowars writes after gunshots were heard at a golf course where the Orange Pharoh was sporting and the Secret Service detained someone after they fired at the suspect.

“Darkness cannot exist without the light, the warriors of light tread the shadows of the valley of death, we hear far off gunshots as they extinguish the darkness. The fight against the blackhats continues.,,”  [The commas at the end were Roco’s, apparently intending to symbolize some type of anarchy, or palsy.]