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Preacher of the House Mike Johnson snuck a provision in the $1.2 trillion budget package passed on Friday as the country neared a fiscal cliff that banned US embassies and consulates overseas from flying the LGBTQ Pride flag, CBS News reports.

Johnson used the ban as a selling point to try to get members of the far-right and evangelicals to vote for the budget plan, but the majority of votes passing the budget bill in the House came from Democrats.  The White House said that it was unable to cut the provision, but it did cut more than 50 amendments aimed at the LGBTQ community.

“President Biden believes it was inappropriate to abuse the process that is essential to keep the government open by including this policy targeting LGBTQI+ Americans,” White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre posted on social media. “We fought this policy and will work with Congress to repeal it.”

👀 https://t.co/6eEIOt4c2M

— Jenna Ellis (@JennaEllisEsq) March 24, 2024

It’s been a while since we picked up one of these D-lister right wing influencers tweeting links to these ridiculous clickbait articles, but man this one’s an all-time great in terms of how they just fucking mangled the story to make it this misleading. Actually pretty impressive.

But don’t click on it because we already picked it up: Bryan Malinowski, the executive director of the Bill and Hillary Clinton Airport in Little Rock, Arkansas is dead because ATF agents shot him in when they were serving a search warrant on his home. He was trafficking illegal guns on the side for God knows what reason. That’s the only real question to be raised here. Hillary had jack shit to do with it and it’s a very safe bet that she never met Malinowski, a career air transport bureaucrat.

“It is my great honor to be at Trump International Golf Club in West Palm Beach tonight, AWARDS NIGHT, to receive THE CLUB CHAMPIONSHIP TROPHY & THE SENIOR CLUB CHAMPIONSHIP TROPHY. I WON BOTH! A large and golfing talented membership, a GREAT and difficult course, made the play very exciting. The qualifying and match play was amazing. A large and distinguished group will be there tonight. Very exciting, thank you!!!” writes fat former President Trump on Truth Social.

New Jersey First Lady Tammy Murphy will drop out of the Dem Senate primary, clearing the path for Congressman Andy Kim to take over for Gold Bars Bob Menendez, Politico reports.

Garden State political observers will probably tell you this is like an “earthquake” or something given the “machine” nature inherent to both state parties, and that the Murphys had strong-armed a shit ton of endorsements from Democratic officials and local party honchos even as Kim had the support of the actual voters in poll after poll. The implications to those of us in the other 49 are less important now that the good guy won and will be the state’s next Senator. It’d be nice of Phil to appoint Kim to the seat when Menendez takes an early retirement in a federal prison facility.

The brief saga of the obese alligator occupying the yard of an abandoned Coca-Cola bottling plant on Fowler Ave that had some neighbors in the Tampa suburb of Temple Terrace, Florida sort of concerned has ended happily for all involved as staff from reptile zoo Croc Encounters arrived Friday to winch the fat bastard onto a pickup truck to re-home him at their fetid tourist trap, WFLA reports.

“It’s rumored the alligator was being fed ham and chicken by employees at surrounding businesses and likely other people as well. Not only is it illegal to feed alligators in the wild but it’s unhealthy for them. This alligator is extremely overweight and now accustomed to getting fed by people,” Croc Encounters wrote in a Facebook post heralding the capture of their newest, fattest addition. They didn’t elaborate on what’s actually going to be different for the gator’s diet and sedentary lifestyle other than that they can now charge people admission to watch them feed him chicken and ham.

Ronna Romney is a cunt.

She is beyond evil, and she is why Republicans lost as much as they did.

Donald Trump needs to condemn this witch. He needs to strongly rebuke this absolute cunt of a woman @RonnaMcDaniel for the sake of the GOP base and the J6 political prisoners. https://t.co/DCgO5EMHmG

— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) March 24, 2024

What’s a deadly terrorist attack on Russia – one US intel tried to help prevent but that piece of shit Vladimir Putin brushed the warnings off as “provocative” – if it can’t somehow be used by Marco Rubio to hype fears that ISIS is going to do the same thing here because border border border?

This fucking asshole is the ranking member on the Senate Intelligence Committee so there’s a decent chance the very same warning came across his desk, as did the warning to Iran that ISIS was going to bomb that general’s memorial back in January. Which means it just might be reasonable to infer that, if twice in two months American intelligence agencies were able to successfully anticipate deadly attacks on American adversaries on the other side of the planet (and still give them the courtesy of a heads-up despite being adversaries), American intelligence agencies are also well-positioned to spot any potential similar threats coming in via our southern neighbors.

And also infer that by virtue of his position Rubio would be more specific about those kind of threats if they actually existed rather than just jerking himself off. Also in the last part of the clip, after the jump, he ruined our joke about the Moscow attack being Biden’s fault. Fucking prick.

Trump Organization Chief Operating Officer Eric Trump on Sunday told Fox News anchor and batshit idiot Maria Bartiromo that he was having no luck securing a bond for the $464 billion his family’s corrupt business empire owes the State of New York, saying “Every single person when I came to them saying can I get a half billion dollar bond… Maria, they were laughing. They were laughing.”

Later Eric tweeted “A half a billion dollar bond is simply not commercially available. The 30 largest bonding companies in the United States have never seen a bond close to this size for anyone, let alone a private company. Letitia James is hellbent on a political vendetta against my father with zero regard for the lives of thousands of hard-working New Yorkers, who make their living in our buildings” and “The entire world is watching this unfold. The notion of seizing properties owned by the Former President of the United States (and the front runner for President in 2024) – properties belonging to a company that has NEVER missed a payment, never been in default, never breached a covenant, built American skylines, has repeatedly made banks hundreds of millions of dollars while employing THOUSANDS of hard working New Yorkers – is shattering the trust of not just of New York (which is fragile at best) but in the entire legal system in the United States.”

White Nationalist Congresswoman Majorie Taylor Greene was downright fucking furious over Wisconsin Republican Mike Gallagher’s surprise Friday announcement that he would be resigning from the House effective April 19th which at that point would be too late for the state to schedule a special election and the seat, in an R+15 district, will remain empty until January due to state election law that says the point of no return is the second Tuesday in April of an election year.

The problem is that the House is in recess until literally that day. And they’ll need Dem votes to expel him for merely inconveniently timing his resignation. The House’s calendar makes it sort of obvious that Gallagher just wanted to come back and say his goodbyes before another recess starts April 19th. QAdulteress simply cannot countenance Republicans being dealt a shitty hand.

White House National Security Council spokesperson Adrienne Watson tells CBS News that Ukraine was in no way involved in the horrible massacre at the Crocus City Hall venue in Moscow on Friday, saying “In early March, the US government shared information with Russia about a planned terrorist attack in Moscow. We also issued a public advisory to Americans in Russia on March 7. ISIS bears sole responsibility for this attack. There was no Ukrainian involvement whatsoever.”

Ronna Not-Romney’s debut on NBC’s Meet The Press this Sunday already was sure to piss off the Orange God Emperor – as well as all the libs who were still hate-watching – when she explained her previous silence on opposing the fat bastard’s plans to pardon all Capitol rioters with “When you’re the RNC chair, you kind of take one for the whole team.” Later in the interview she said it’s appropriate for the party’s to pay for Trump’s legal bills “as long as they know.” Ronna also said, with about as straight a face as she could muster, that she views her term as chair as a success.

Kristen Welker had to go out of her way to tell viewers that she was not involved in hiring Ronna.

After winning the Caddo Parish, Louisiana sheriff’s race against Republican John Nickelson 21,621 to 21,620 in the November 2023 race, only to see it nullified by a judge, Democratic candidate Henry Whitehorn trounced Nickelson 21,147 to 18,880 in the Saturday re-run.

Far right 2022 Pennsylvania gubernatorial election loser state Senator Doug Mastriano on Friday announced he’ll soon be introducing a bill – modeled after a similar one that recently advanced in the Tennessee state Senate – banning chemtrails from the skies of the Keystone State.

“Soon, I will introduce legislation amending the PA Cloud Seeding Licensure Law to ensure the skies over Pennsylvania are protected well into the future. Enshrined in Article 1, Section 27 of the Constitution of Pennsylvania is the people’s ‘right to clean air, pure water, and to the preservation of the natural, scenic, historic and esthetic values of the environment,'” wrote Mastriano in a memo.

“The Wall Street Journal recently confirmed active field experiments in Solar Radiation Mitigation being conducted by a private start-up in Israel called Stardust Solutions, and in Marine Cloud Brightening being conducted by Southern Cross University in Australia. Spraying unknown, experimental, potentially dangerous chemicals into the atmosphere without the consent of the people of Pennsylvania is a clear violation of Article 1, Sec 27 of the PA Constitution. My legislation will amend the Cloud Seeding Licensure law to ban the injection, release, or dispersion of chemicals, chemical compounds, or substances within the borders of Pennsylvania into the atmosphere for purposes of affecting temperature, weather, or intensity of sunlight. This bill will mirror legislation that recently passed in the Tennessee Senate by a vote of 25-6. Please join me as a sponsor.”

Contradicting a statement by NBC’s head of political coverage, MSNBC President Rashida Jones said in an email to the channel’s employees that her division will refuse to feature new political contributor Ronna Romney McDaniel, the Wall Street Journal reports.

NBC executive Carrie Buddif Brown’s announcement of McRomney’s signing noted that the former RNC head would contribute “across all NBC News platforms,” a statement that got pushback from MSNBC liberal viewers and staff, who cite McRomney’s support and promotion of Donald Trump’s election lies and insurrection efforts as discrediting factors.

But in a separate email to MSNBC staff, Jones assured her team that the network would stay true to the facts reported, questioning the new contributor’s analysis and statements given she was complicit in many of the criminal acts being covered. McRomney is scheduled to make her network debut Sunday on Meet the Press on NBC.

State media reported police arrested eleven people, including four they claim were gunmen, for the attack on a Moscow-area performance hall that has left 133 people dead, according to CBS News.  The report stated the suspects were arrested in the Bryansk region of western Russia, which borders Ukraine, likely to add fuel to Kremlin talking points that the attackers were affiliated with the Ukrainian military.  ISIS has claimed responsibility for the attacks, with US officials saying they warned the Kremlin of signs of an impending terrorist act, but Putin brushed off the information.

The newest NBC News contributor Ronna Romney McDaniel wants a fresh start as a cable commentator and to get it, she’s working to erase her past.  According to the liberal provocateurs at Meidas Touch, the former RNC chair, booted out to make room for Donald Trump’s checkwriters, has scrubbed her deadnamed Twitter account of any posts she made mentioning her new employer, the DNC, Joe Biden and other Democrats.   Unfortunately for McRomney, she can’t erase the hundreds of insidious and vile posts she retweeted from the likes of Elise Stefanik, the GOP, and Matt Gaetz.

A new report in the Congressional Republicans’ (un)official state media outlet, aka Axios, says that the House GOP are at the point where they apparently actually believe they could lose their majority to the Dems before next January, even though that would take at least nine more GOP resignations given the upcoming special elections to fill vacant seats in CO-4, NY-26, CA-20, and OH-6.

This is a point that the media keeps fucking up – and we’ve been guilty of it too – when they say the GOP now currently has a one-seat majority in the House. It is technically true, but that’s a majority of the 435 seats. The number of voting members right now stands at 218 GOP to 213 Dem. With four special elections on the calendar, three of them safe GOP, one Dem, if nothing else changes by late June we’re looking at a 221 R to 213 D House. Hilariously Mike Gallagher is fucking them over by waiting until after the window is closed for a special election to replace him to effect his resignation.

“By the grace of God Almighty, four Inghamis from the soldiers of the Caliphate headed toward a large gathering of infidel Christians inside a celebration hall in the city of Krasnogorsk in the capital, Moscow, yesterday. They stormed the hall and targeted the Christians with machine guns and knives. They also set fire to the hall with incendiary bombs, resulting in one death and one injury. At least 300 people, and two-thirds of the place was burned. Praise be to God. Let Crusader Russia and its allies know that the Mujahideen do not forget their revenge,” says a statement from ISIS’s central propaganda operation via Washington Institute fellow Aaron Zelin, further boosting the likelihood that the Moscow attack really was the Islamic State’s work – whether or not the Kremlin colluded with them or otherwise simply allowed it to happen to justify a security crackdown.

Zelin also posted images from another confirmed ISIS outlet that purportedly showed the terrorists prepping for the attack. The New York Times reports the death toll has risen to 133.

What the hell is this evil?
A Federal Red Flag center;
We did not authorize this.
Announced, of course, just hours after the omnibus passes. https://t.co/IkuK0aTeV8

— Thomas Massie (@RepThomasMassie) March 23, 2024

“The Justice Department launched the National Extreme Risk Protection Order (ERPO) Resource Center (the Center) which will provide training and technical assistance to law enforcement officials, prosecutors, attorneys, judges, clinicians, victim service and social service providers, community organizations, and behavioral health professionals responsible for implementing laws designed to keep guns out of the hands of people who pose a threat to themselves or others.”

“ERPO laws, which are modeled off domestic violence protection orders, create a civil process allowing law enforcement, family members (in most states), and medical professionals or other groups (in some states) to petition a court to temporarily prohibit someone at risk of harming themselves or others from purchasing and possessing firearms for the duration of the order,” says the Justice Department press release linked in the above tweet, heralding the ERPO launch.

We have no idea if the spending bill actually contained funding and/or authorization for this, but if it did the reactions from Massie and Marjorie Taylor Greene who tweeted “This comes right after Johnson fully funded Biden’s weaponized DOJ,” speak to them not doing their homework because if it was in there then they would have been screaming about it before the House passed it.

Russian dictator Vladimir Putin on Saturday addressed his country in the aftermath of the deadly ISIS attack on the Crocus City Hall luxury mall and concert venue on Friday, claiming that four terrorists had been attempting to flee toward Ukraine when they were arrested, Sky News reports.

“All four direct perpetrators of the terrorist attack, all those who shot and killed people, were found and detained,” said Putin. “They tried to hide and moved towards Ukraine, where, according to preliminary data, a window was prepared for them on the Ukrainian side to cross the state border.”

At least 115 are dead, among them three children in the shooting and arson attack that ISIS have allegedly claimed responsibility for. The fires are still burning, CNN reports separately.