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“We’re in the middle of an Election. We have Super Tuesday coming up very shortly. According to Justice Department guidelines, they shouldn’t be prosecuting me: ‘Federal prosecutors and agents may never select the timing of any action, including investigative steps, criminal charges, or statements, for the purpose of affecting any election, or for the purpose of giving an advantage or disadvantage to any candidate or political party.’ THIS IS ELECTION INTERFERENCE, AND SHOULD BE STOPPED IN THE COURTS!” posted fat former President Trump on Truth Social, writing literally why the Justice Department guidelines do not apply in his case because “investigative steps, criminal charges, or statements” are not the same as prosecuting a preexisting indictment, a position special counsel Jack Smith and his team on Friday specifically stated in a court hearing.

Just prior to that he also crowed “The Supreme Court will address the historic question of Presidential Immunity. Without Presidential Immunity, the President cannot function, as his Political Opponents will blackmail and extort him with the threat of wrongful prosecution at every turn. I look forward to presenting my case to the Supreme Court,” rubbing it in libs’ faces that his DC trial is delayed another few months because of the Supreme Cunts setting arguments for April 22.

A number of experts including George Conway and former Mueller team prosecutor Andrew Weissman said in podcasts recorded after that order on Wednesday that what looks like a win at first does also put Trump in serious danger of still being on trial on Election Day or convicted days beforehand, which might actually be worse for him than if a guilty verdict had come months earlier, as the MAGA propaganda industrial complex needs time to work to memory hole bad news.

Former South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley on Sunday told NBC’s Kristen Welker there’s no need for Congress to codify a right to in-vitro fertilization. In response, former South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley told NBC’s Kristen Welker Congress should codify a right to in-vitro fertilization.

Republican Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski tells NBC’s Ali Vitali she’s not voting for disgraced former President Trump in November, something not terribly surprising considering she was one of seven who voted to convict the fat fuck in his second impeachment trial but also still noteworthy considering the capitulations of others such as former Congressman Peter Meijer.

Murkowski has endorsed Nikki Haley, who herself hinted that she’s not bound by the RNC pledge she signed to support the eventual nominee. “The RNC is now not the same RNC,” Haley said, though as usual she weaseled in that she has “serious concerns about Donald Trump. I have even more concerns about Joe Biden,” when asked by NBC’s Kristen Welker if she’d endorse Donald.

Not like we need any further confirmation that Marco Rubio is a complete dipshit but we can go to the tape from just a few weeks ago where he was against the bipartisan border deal:

A 19 year-old Guatemalan migrant farm worker is no longer facing life in a Florida prison after prosecutors dropped a bullshit “aggravated homicide of a police officer” charge brought last year when a St John’s County Sheriff’s deputy dropped dead of a heart attack immediately after a struggle to arrest the kid who had no idea what was going on at the time, ABC News reports.

Sgt Michael Kunovich was shorehorned into a list compiled by Breitbart of “14 Americans, Legal Immigrants Among Those Allegedly Killed by Illegal Aliens in 2023” late last year, even as per ABC News, an autopsy report said Kunovich’s death after beating the shit out of the migrant, Virgilio Aguilar Mendez, “may have been a result of the severe heart disease, a prior heart attack or heart and lung deterioration due to smoking.” It’s not entirely clear however if that was the real reason the charges were dropped, as the court also determined that “based on concerns about the intellectual capacity of Virgilio Aguilar Mendez and the recent ruling finding him to be incompetent,” as he was incapable of understanding the American justice system and doesn’t understand English.

He also doesn’t really understand Spanish either, as he speaks an obscure indigenous Central American language called Mam. Though Aguilar Mendez has been exonerated, he’s still in ICE custody pending deportation proceedings. Breitbart’s earlier reporting on the story says the kid crossed the border in 2022 and was released into the US, which indicates that he’s an asylum claimant and not simply an illegal alien who crawled under the fencing or walked through the desert.

In a scene with a slight possibility of replaying in the US in November, as he sits in a prison cell after his corruption conviction, Pakistan’s opposition leader called on his followers to obstruct any policies or initiatives put forth by the new coalition government of newly-elected Prime Minister Shehbaz Sharif, who was re-elected to the position after forming a tenuous coalition government with typical rivals.

Per the Washington Post, Sharif was elected by a 201 to 92 in the Parliament as supporters of former prime minister and current inmate Imran Khan shouted “Thief!” from the floor.  Khan’s Movement for Justice members claim Sharif ordered election workers to slow vote counts and exclude votes from the February 8th election so he could secure the election; as with similar claims by the losing Party here in the United States, no evidence of widespread fraud by Khan or his supporters has been presented.

Even though the election was scheduled for a little more than a week away, Khan was convicted and sentenced on January 30th of selling gifts given to the government of Pakistan when he was Prime Minister for personal profit.  He is also accused of disclosing information from a classified government communication alleging that the United States government sought to damage Khan’s credibility and campaign.  He also claims the US attempted to oust him while he served as prime minister from 2018 to 2022. 

“Today, House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jim Jordan (R-OH) sent a letter to Alphabet, Google’s and YouTube’s parent company, demanding documents and communications related to the creation, training, and deployment of its Gemini AI model, an artificial intelligence chatbot technology. The Committee is investigating how and to what extent the Executive Branch has coerced or colluded with Big Tech and other intermediaries to censor Americans’ speech, and this request falls within the scope of the Committee’s subpoena issued on February 15, 2023.”

“Recent reporting asserts that the Executive Branch, most notably the Biden White House, may have influenced the development of Alphabet’s Gemini AI model. On October 30, 2023, President Biden issued an Executive Order on the ‘Safe, Secure, and Trustworthy Development and Use of Artificial Intelligence,’ which claimed to serve as an overarching guide to how the Biden Administration will approach issues like AI development and deployment. The Executive Order states that its guidelines will purportedly ‘advance equity.’ A report by the Alphabet’s Gemini Team stated that its new AI tool was evaluated by external groups, which were selected based on their alignment with the Biden White House Executive Order and ‘White House Commitments,'” says a House Judiciary Committee press release, and holy shit they’re trying to make Google Gemini a campaign issue, lol.

Donald Trump continues on the campaign trail, stopping in Richmond, Virginia for a rally Saturday afternoon that was like every other Trump rally since 2015:  a fair share of xenophobia and hyperbole, combined with healthy parts of self-glorification and lies.  Instead of subjecting you to hours of the same rhetoric and ear bleeds, we’ve distilled it to the most pertinent 45 seconds.

In The Heartland where conservatives are so scared of the LGBTQ community they’re banning books and passing laws banning millennia-old forms of entertainment, some good old-fashioned American kink made it into an Oklahoma high school fundraiser where students in grades 9 through 12 licked peanut butter off the patrons’ feet in public as part of a philanthropy week, according to the Daily Beast.

And never one to turn away an opportunity to smear a group of people they target, Libs of TikTok founder Chaya Raichik shared the video, claiming it was a stunt put on by transgender people, because it’s never the outwardly straight people who corrupt children, right?

The Republican Caucasians continue to fall in lockstep with the far-right of the GOP, shoving Donald Trump towards the nomination with the fervor of the Traffic Cone Tyrant targeting the Mar-a-Lago omelet station. Per the Washington Post, the Republican caucuses in Missouri and Michigan handing all their respective delegates to Trump, and the Idaho caucus will likely result in Trump getting most, if not all, of their available delegates.

Oh, in case you’re wondering how Michigan is re-allocating delegates after last week’s Michigan primary, the one which spawned the National Zero Housemother:  The Michigan state GOP only allowed voters to allot sixteen delegates, leaving the remaining 39 to go to the hand-picked choice of Party leadership, which went unironically to the guy who said he would dismantle the Swamp.

Trump has bizarre episode of incomprehensible slurring while trying to pronounce Venezuela pic.twitter.com/zkVBthb86C

— Biden-Harris HQ (@BidenHQ) March 2, 2024

A Trump minion tells Politico that all DC-based lobbyists are commanded to vote in the District’s meaningless upcoming primary if they want access to his future Reich. “The Trump campaign is very cognizant of who makes up the GOP primary voters in DC. The worst thing for them would be not showing up. If you don’t bother voting, don’t bother calling,” the minion said.

While it’s impossible to know whom they voted for, it is very simple to find out whether or not a person cast a ballot in an election and the edict has been issued to the lobbyists.

• Yes, the Trump trial schedule got thrown into the shredder, but deep down inside, you always knew the Republicans on the Supreme Court would intervene to make sure things didn’t get resolved speedily. My surprise comes from how bunglingly obvious the conservatives on the bench made their effort to push back the trial.  So now, we just have to beat him at the ballot box, again.
• May Alexei Navalny one day be seen as Russia’s Patrick Henry.  Rest in peace.
• Through all the frustration with the trial schedules, let Donald Trump’s humiliation at having to admit he couldn’t put up the entire amount of the New York civil judgment lighten the load.  For the first time, he had to publicly acknowledge he did not have the wealth he claimed and he tried to lowball the Court.
• I hope the next GOP Senate leader is as zoomorphic as his predecessor.
  Read More ▶ “Random thoughts Friday, Volume CLXII”

Mike Parsons, the Republican governor of Missouri, commuted a three-year prison sentence for Super Bowl champion Kansas City NFL team coach Andy Reid’s son, who had been sentenced to a three-year prison term after severely injuring a five-year-old while driving under the influence of alcohol in 2021, per CNN.

Britt Reid, a former assistant coach for the Chiefs, was put on administrative leave after his arrest and not re-signed when his contract expired.  “Mr. Reid has completed his alcohol abuse treatment program and has served more prison time than most individuals convicted of similar offenses. Mr. Reid will be under house arrest until October 31, 2025, with strict conditions of probation, including weekly meetings with a parole officer, weekly behavioral counseling attendance, weekly meetings with a peer support sponsor, and stringent community service and employment requirements,” the governor’s office said in a statement, without noting if this was a thank you for the Lombardi Trophy.

“The hypocrisy is rich here because they’re doing it all in the name of saving democracy,” former someone Tulsi Gabbard smirks.  “A-a-and the, the bigger underlyin–sure the other other underlying issue here, is that they’re not only doing this here.  Look at their foreign policy, the Democratic elite. President Biden’s pillar of his foreign policy is going around the world and protecting and spreading democracy and using that as an excuse to go in and oftentimes wage these regime change wars, spending our taxpayer dollars and oftentimes sending our men and women, their lives on the lives in doing so.”

Alaska Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski endorsed the presumed second-place finisher in the Republican presidential delegate race Nikki Haley, eschewing the favor of frontrunner Donald Trump, Politico reports.  “America needs someone with the right values, vigor, and judgment to serve as our next President — and in this race, there is no one better than her,” Murkowski said in a statement.

Two underwater photographers unintentionally dropped in on an intimate encounter between two whales off the Hawaiian island of Maui, only to realize the humping humpbacks were two males making the photos the pair took of the cetic sex not just the first photos of humpbacks humping, but the first of homosexual humpbacks humping.  Per People, photographers Lyle Krannichfeld and Brandi Romano boated out to deep water when the two whales started circling the vessel before one mounted the other.

A right wing guest billed as “James Lee” who appeared on Jesse Watters’ show Wednesday to scream about “migrant crime” is in fact named James DePaola, a change Fox News probably made to hide that he was once arrested for screaming at his wife and ripping the phone out of the wall to prevent her from calling the cops to the house simply because she had made him a grilled cheese with three slices of cheese instead of two like he had asked, Media Matters reports.

DePaola, of Athens, Georgia, was booked on the show after he loudly interrupted a police press conference over the murder of Laken Riley by a Venezuelan migrant earlier that day. Obviously he’s concerned over violence towards women because, per his 2016 arrest report over what cops called the “grilled cheese incident,” DePaola has a history of “abusive behavior,” and was”excessively critical and controlling of day to day things in life.” DePaola was charged with obstruction of a 911 call and criminal trespass/property damage for that incident and was subsequently arrested in 2020 and 2023 for driving without a license and without insurance, respectively.

Tapping the brake on the far-right’s demonization of anything they feel slights their beliefs, Republican Florida Governor and Napoleon of the Culture Wars Ron DeSantis vetoed a bill pushed through the legislature banning children under the age of 16 from using social media, the WFSU reports.  DeSantis plans to reintroduce the legislation after adding a provision allowing 14- and 15-year-old children to get a social media account with parental permission.

Is the Gemini fallout a 'Bud Light moment' for Google? https://t.co/veT1MA9KYW

— FOX Business (@FoxBusiness) March 1, 2024