A Manhattan federal judge on Monday rejected disgraced former President Trump’s request for a four week “cooling off” period to delay the scheduled April 25th start of the trial in writer E Jean Carroll’s defamation lawsuit against the credibly accused rapist. Trump had asked for the pushback after his indictment on 34 felonies for falsifying business records in his 2016 campaign hush money payoffs to pornstar Stormy Daniels and Playboy model Karen McDougal, claiming “prospective jurors will have the criminal allegations top of mind” during the civil trial in the Carroll case.

US District Judge Lewis Kaplan said tough shit, and cited Donald’s interviews since the indictment in rejecting the request. “It does not sit well for Mr. Trump to promote pretrial publicity and then to claim that coverage that he promoted was prejudicial to him and should be taken into account as supporting a further delay. At bottom, Mr. Trump has failed to show that there is anything about the media coverage of his indictment or about the supposed efficacy of a ‘cooling off’ period that would warrant an adjournment of this trial,” Kaplan wrote in his ruling.

In an “exclusive” titled “Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis plans to unveil new crackdown against Disney after 11th-hour coup” and none other than fucking Jonathan Turley on the byline along with some reporter, the New York Post helps Tiny D hype some secret plan to recoup some small measure of his manhood following the humiliating defeat of his hand-picked oversight board.

“What they tried to do is an embarrassment,” a “senior administration source” said and Jesus freaking Christ, lol. “The narrative the left is spinning is that Gov DeSantis was outmaneuvered. But this is far from over, and he’s going to have the last laugh,” the Post actually printed.

Now we shouldn’t underestimate DeSantis. He’s an arrogant little asshole, but he’s not dumb and wields power ruthlessly. Maybe whatever it is will really be an effective counterpunch. However that a friendly media outlet and stupid Jonathan Turley hyping this rather than actually just saying what it is that they’re going to do to own the Disney libtards doesn’t exactly bode well.

Right wing school board candidates had a bad election day earlier this month, with the founder of the “1776 Project” propaganda initiative admitting to Politico that the “Critical Race Theory” and similar bullshit fear-mongering flamed out in races all across the country on April 4th.

“We lost more than we won,” said Ryan Gidursky. “But we didn’t lose everything. We didn’t get obliterated. We still pulled our weight through, and we just have to keep on pushing forward on this.”

Politico says there’s no official tally given the sheer number of school districts nationwide that would have held elections on the 4th. It’s a safe bet that Gidursky would be keeping track of it and would’ve had the numbers handy, given how his network supported all the candidates. That he wouldn’t share the win percentage is a good indicator that it was probably actually pretty fucking bad, and “pushing forward” is going to mean even less next time, further and further removed from the astroturfed “racial indoctrination in schools” MAGA media panic of 2021.

A Russian court on Monday sentenced libtard Vladimir Kara-Murza to 25 years in the gulag for hating the Kremlin and all the peace and prosperity it has brought to Russia, the AP reports.

Failing leftist propaganda network Amnesty International, which is probably backed by Soros, denounced the sentence as “yet another chilling example of the systematic repression of civil society, which has broadened and accelerated” since Russia started defending the world from Ukrainian bioweapons labs and the woke policies of socialist thug Volodymyr Zelensky.

Far right extremist Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas will belatedly amend his financial disclosure forms to include his share of the $133,363 income from the 2014 sale of his mother’s house in Georgia to his Hitler loving Texas MAGA billionaire pal Harlan Crow, CNN reports.

A source told CNN that Thomas believed he didn’t have to report the income because he “lost money on the deal” and that he always has aides do that sort of stuff for him anyway, to which we say what the fuck? How does a Supreme Court justice not know basic ethics laws? And is he definitely sure he wants to do this now? What if he has to amend them again next week?

The sheriff and a county commissioner for McCurtain County, Oklahoma were among the people recorded discussing hiring a hitman to assassinate a local reporter and bringing back hanging Black people down by the river (literally) after the official end of a county meeting, The Oklahoman reports.

The conversation of Sheriff Kevin Clardy, Sheriff’s Office investigator Alicia Manning and Commissioner Mark Jennings was captured after a reporter trying to catch officials having secret meetings without public notice left a running recorder after the official end of a meeting.  He retrieved the device later and found it captured three hours of conversation.

A man whose voice sounds like Jennings claimed Black people have more rights than “we’ve got,” presumably meaning white people.  He fondly recalled the era when white people could “[t]ake them [Black people] down to Mud Creek and hang them up with damned rope.  But you can’t do that anymore. They’ve got more rights than we’ve got.”  [Side note:  Oklahoma passed HB 1775 earlier this year, which bars the teaching of Critical Race Theory in elementary and high schools, where it is not taught.  CRT deals with issues like institutional racism in law enforcement.]

A 16-year-old Black boy accidentally knocked on the door of the wrong house in Kansas City when he was trying to pick up his little brother, and a white man who opened the door then fired a shot into the boy’s head, according to the Daily Beast.  The man–who has been released from police custody pending further investigation–then shot the boy in the head again, but somehow the boy, Ralph Yarl, was able to scramble to a different neighbor… who made him lay facedown on the ground before calling for assistance.

The shooter–who, have we mentioned, is a white man who shot a Black boy twice and was released from police custody–has not been identified. “The vast majority of cases to include violent crime involve the suspect being released pending further investigation,” Chief Stacey Graves said justifying the fact that she released the white man who shot a Black boy in the head, twice. “In this case, the prosecutor requires more information from investigators that would take more than 24 hours to compile throughout the weekend.”

US military special forces killed three ISIS members, including an individual believed to be a senior leader operating in Syria, during a raid Sunday, and officials also identified a second ISIS senior leader who was killed earlier this month, ABC News reports.

Apparently unaware Donald Trump said he com-plete-ly destroyed them, ISIS has been operating in northwest Syria as a combatant in an ongoing civil war. “The raid resulted in the probable death of a senior ISIS Syria leader and operational planner responsible for planning terror attacks in the Middle East and Europe,” a U.S. Central Command spokesman said.  Officials also identified the man killed by US forces in a different raid earlier this month as Khalid ‘Aydd Ahmad Al-Jabouri, who planned terrorist attacks in Turkey and Europe.

Delaware Superior Court Judge Eric Davis on Sunday delayed the start of the big Dominion v Fox News trial by a day, with the start of jury selection now scheduled for Tuesday. A number of smart people speculated the judge may have done it to encourage Dominion to take a settlement, but Puck News correspondent Eriq Gardner reports a source tells him one hasn’t been reached yet.

For all the many, many volumes that have been written about the 2020 election, nobody really seems to have come up with a moment in the campaign that Trump definitely lost it right then and there. Of course his fanboys like to act like it was when Twitter and Facebook throttled the Hunter Biden laptop story, but it’s questionable how much they actually sincerely believe that shit. There’s nothing to point to like the late October 2016 Comey letter announcing reopening the Hillary Clinton emails investigation which, if it wasn’t a real turning point it was certainly a neatly symbolic culmination of all the many, many issues she had with appealing to swing voters.

Was it the “inject disinfectants” comment? The first debate when Trump melted down on stage and told the Proud Boys to “stand by”? When he caught COVID-19 and nearly died a few days later? It was all of those things and much more, but not any one of them that can be picked out as neatly as the Republican 2012 Missouri Senate candidate Todd Akin imploding his chances in a winnable race by explaining that rape exceptions to abortion bans were unnecessary because “if it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”

A Tennessee Air National Guardsman took a shot at a new career that would utilize the talents he amassed in the military–including marksmanship skills that he claimed earned him the nickname “Reaper”–by applying for a job on the website RentAHitman.com, “your point and click solution,” according to the website.

According to NBC News, 21-year-old Josiah Ernesto Garcia filled out an online application at the parody website, which was first set up decades ago for a start-up company to help small businesses fight off cyberattacks but morphed into a parody assassination-for-hire website that boasted more than “17,985 U.S. Based Field Operatives” and “100% compliance with the Hitman Information Privacy and Protection Act of 1964 (HIPPA)” [original emphasis].

Garcia was persistent, telling his potential employer that he was highly regarded for his shooting skills in the military, saying needed money to support his child and boasting that he rated as a “Marksman Expert … for not missing a single bullseye on all of the targets and for shooting expert with 2 (or more) weapons,” according to the Washington Post’s story.

After the disclosures that he omitted millions of dollars in gifts from a billionaire supporter of conservative causes, and that he failed to report the highly-profitable sale of his mother’s Georgia home to the same billionaire, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas’s latest financial foible seems almost quaint:  for nearly two decades, his disclosure statements have included income from a real estate company that closed in 2006, the Washington Post reports.

Thomas consistently reported income between $50,000 to $100,000 from Ginger, Ltd. Partnership, a Nebraska-based real estate company started by his wife, Ginni, and her family in 1980s.  However, that company was dissolved in 2006 and replaced with a completely new entity, Ginger Holdings, LLC.  While it could have been an innocent oversight that the company name had not been updated on forms, Thomas’s previous misstatements bring into question the legitimacy of any statement the beleaguered justice makes.

In 2011, Thomas was forced to resubmit years’ of financial statements after journalists uncovered hundreds of thousands of dollars in income his wife accrued from conservative advocacy groups.  Ginni Thomas is also under fire for her role in attempting to overturn the 2020 election, having texted key figures including Trump White House chief of staff Mark Meadows to offer advice and assistance.

A 30 year-old The Villages, Florida man arrested Thursday morning at a Walmart after walking past a woman with “his erect penis out of the zipper of his pants,” told sheriff’s deputies he had merely forgotten to zip up his pants after using the restroom in the store, Villages-News.com reports.

Aaron Campbell, of the Village of Lady Lake, was arrested at the store and charged with exposure of sexual organs. The responding deputy noted that Campbell’s pants were still “halfway unzipped” when he was stopped for questioning after store staff identified him as the weenie wagger.

A new CBS News/YouGov survey finds 61 percent of respondents support a national ban on the sale of AR-15 assault rifles, including 44 percent of those who identify as Republicans, said they favor a national ban on the sale of AR-15 assault rifles, the weapon of choice for white nationalist MAGA terrorists to quickly murder multiple innocent people to make a political statement.

The account of Truth Social user @colton63 – which had six followers – found itself nuked sometime early Sunday after posting a video purporting to show George Soros being executed which disgraced former President Trump apparently had “retruthed” late on Saturday, according to “RINO” lawyer George Conway who posted a screenshot of the “retruth” from Trump’s feed.

We cannot independently verify this happened just yet as unfortunately all of the archived versions of Trump’s page that might have contained the “retruth” from Saturday failed to read and save all of the posts. There’s another, definitely separate, screenshot by Twitter user Spiro Agnew’s ghost. A link to a video, dated March 12th, with the same description definitely exists on Telegram. So we can’t say with absolute certainty that Trump definitely 100 percent “retruthed” the link but pretty damn close given the idiosyncrasies and the hasty deletion of Colton63’s account.

Turns out that former South Carolina Governor Nimrata “Nikki” Haley’s $11 million campaign fundraising haul touted earlier this month was complete bullshit, as the Washington Post reports her minions used some creative bookkeeping to shuffle $8.3 million around between committees to inflate the number. Too bad they couldn’t do the same with Haley’s single-digit poll numbers.