There’s a really important sportsball game on Saturday between these two teams in the Midwest. Lots of people are talking about it. And that’s in the literal sense, not like the “It’s really me who said this but I’m trying to make it sound like this is a widely held opinion” sense. We’re not “just asking questions” about the hype around this game. We’re not asking questions at all actually. But even if we were, they wouldn’t carry the implication that we’re weakly obfuscating bad faith rhetoric under the guise of “asking questions.” We like to think that we possess a pretty keen sense of where the public’s collective attention is directed, so we’re confident that we’re making the right call here about this game’s importance. It’s no exaggeration to call this a “Big Game” or even “THE Big Game.”

Sure, you could say the upcoming sportsball game between Mexico and Argentina (the one where the players kick the ball for most of the game) is quantifiably important to more sportsball fans than the one that those colleges are playing this afternoon (the one where the players kick the ball only a few times), as it’s playing out in front of a global audience. But we put “Midwest” in the headline. We made it abundantly clear we’re referring to that particular really big sportsball game.

The bottom line is that this game is really big in the Midwest and medium big elsewhere. We’re not sure what time it starts – or “kicks off” in sportsball jargon – or which television channel is broadcasting it. We encourage readers to check their local listings for that information.

Small businesses are vital to our communities and employ millions of Americans around the country.

Today, and every day, support your neighbors and strengthen your community by shopping small. pic.twitter.com/XX48b70I8v

— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) November 26, 2022

California Gov Gavin Newsom tells Politico he gave the White House his word he won’t mount a primary challenge to President Biden in 2024, averting the biggest chance for the kind of destructive internecine conflict that contributed to the reelection losses for Presidents Ford and Carter.

“I’ve told everyone in the White House, from the chief of staff to the first lady,” Newsom said earlier this month, adding that he told Biden directly “I’m all in. put me in coach. We have your back.”

“Why is this top story on bb? are the rinos and nevertrumpers taking over here too?”

– The current top comment on the Breitbart article “Trump Dined at Mar-a-Lago with White Nationalist, Holocaust Denier Nick Fuentes Alongside Kanye West,” posted Friday, evidently annoyed at Breitbart for calling a white nationalist Holocaust denier a white Nationalist Holocaust denier.

• Wow, Friday snuck up fast this week.  Today really has a Sunday-ish feel.
• People keep talking about the inevitability of Ron DeSantis, and all I keep hearing is the echo of Scott Walker who, rumor has it, is now the assistant manager of a Petco in Beloit.
• MAGA got skunked in Alaska and Arizona.  But the fact that Republicans lost races because Americans rejected MAGAts overwhelmingly in competitive races isn’t just a problem for Trump; it’s a problem for the GOP.  No sane Republican will want to run in a primary when the likely opponent is a no-hold-barred Trumpian who will broadcast slurs and conspiracy theories.
• This week was so bad for MAGA, it exported its failure to Brazil.  Bye bye, Bolsonaro.
  Read More ▶ “Random thoughts Friday, Volume XCVII”

Happy Black Friday National Zero fans! Want to read a bunch of dated Generation X cliches about anti-consumerism that were considered edgy alongside CDs with “Explicit Content warnings”? Great! You should be able to find plenty of those if you search for it on Google – or maybe an AOL keyword. Here on this site we’re going balls to the wall on helping you find THE hottest Black Friday deals as the 2022 Christmas shopping season officially kicks off! BLACK FRIDAY RULES!

Disgraced former President Trump on Friday tried to distance himself from white nationalist anti-semite Nick Fuentes after numerous reports indicated he had granted an audience to the sick fuck along with batshit idiot Kanye West earlier this week. “Kanye West very much wanted to visit Mar-a-Lago. Our dinner meeting was intended to be Kanye and me only, but he arrived with a guest whom I had never met and knew nothing about,” said Donald in a statement, as if we’re supposed to buy that Kanye tells Trump what to do in his own house, or that he doesn’t know who Fuentes is.

I suppose it’s understandable:  soccer’s governing body has banned English soccer fans from wearing fake chain mail, carrying shields, and donning costumes bearing the heraldry of Medieval European Crusaders who sought to free the Holy Land from the evil Muslims, during games in Qatar, an Islamic state, NBC News reports.

On the heels of banning rainbow imagery to support LGBTQ rights from the pitch–and officials barring them from the stands–as well as Qatar’s requirement that alcohol not be served to the masses during matches, FIFA is bending over backwards to meet Qatar’s authoritarian demands that fans and observers have seen as oppressive, something FIFA officials knew would be a problem when Qatar was awarded the games but brushed aside concerns because FIFA officials would make millions as Qatar attempts to reimage itself on the world stage.

FIFA officials said the imagery of Knights Templar or other Medieval symbolism worn by English fans would incite anger among the host country’s population, given that the 300,000 Qataris are Muslim, although the other 2.7 million residents of the kingdom are laborers of various religions brought in from around the world to serve the handful of oil-rich natives.

Loser far right Arizona gubernatorial candidate Kari Lake on Wednesday filed a lawsuit against Maricopa County, accusing them of breaking election laws and demanding they provide info on voters whose ballots were impacted by printer issues on election day, the Arizona Republic reports.

Unlike her ticket-mate, likely loser Attorney General candidate Abe Hamadeh, it doesn’t appear that Lake is trying to get the election overturned just yet. “We want some information. We’re on a timeline, a very strict timeline when it comes to fighting this botched election, and they’re dragging their feet,” said Lake during an appearance on convicted felon Steve Bannon’s show.

MyPillow assclown Mike Lindell told the National File on Wednesday he will mount a challenge to Ronna Not-Romney McDaniel for the Republican National Committee chair position.

“Ronna McDaniel has failed in her leadership,” Lindell said, which is not unnecessarily untrue, but come on, lol. “We need a new input to get a different output. We need someone who knows how to run a business to lead one of the most important organizations in our country,” Lindell added as if that attitude had actually turned out well for the RNC and the country itself. It didn’t.

Oh, what a prankster rapper Kanye West is!  Besides wanting to be called “Ye,” which itself is a play on another of his monikers, “Yeezy,” West also fancies himself to be a presidential candidate, and during a recent meeting with Donald Trump and Nick Fuentes, the highly stylized white nationalist with perfect hair, he asked Trump to join his 2024 ticket as West’s vice presidential running mate, something West says “caught [Trump] off guard.”

West said he also demanded Trump fashion his policies to match Christian beliefs–because the twice divorced, adulterous former casino owner obviously follows biblical teachings.  Oh, and West notes this after he relates that Trump called Kim Kardashian, “the mother of [West’s] children,” something so vile West bleeped it.

Four hundred years ago, a group of white people decided they were over this shit. The pilgrims knew they were cooler and edgier than the rest of the English with their stuffy Anglican faith and monarchic system of government. So they got the fuck out of there and headed for a non-white neighborhood with dirt cheap real estate values. Very quickly, the trendsters imposed their decidedly bougie lifestyle on the Plymouth Rock area, planting their non-GMO crops, building their cabins from responsibly-sourced wood, and consuming free range turkey, organic bread, and bog-grown cranberries. The whole experience just oozed with authenticity. They went out of their way to invite their new non-white friends to dinner as a paean to their multicultural values.

Sure, you could say they were religious zealots, but come on, everyone was back then. In every other respect, the Pilgrims were the original gentrifiers and thus forerunners to today’s upwardly mobile, culturally conscious bicoastal libtards. So the next time you enjoy your free trade cold brew coffee or $16.99 plate of smoked gouda mac and cheese, give thanks to your Caucasian forebears.

Seeing no merit whatsoever to the complaint, Brazil’s top election court on Wednesday rejected autocratic soon-to-be-ex-President Jair Bolsonaro’s challenge to the results of the October 2022 election which saw his defeat to leftist former President Luiz Lula, Reuters reports.

Brazilian Supreme Court Justice Alexandre de Moraes, serving in his role as the nation’s top election judge, called the challenge “offensive” to democratic norms and fined the parties in Bolsonaro’s coalition $4.27 million for litigating in bad faith. “The ballot boxes generate files that make it possible to identify precisely which equipment they were generated on. When one of these mechanisms stops working, others replace it, without affecting its traceability and the possibility of identifying ballot boxes,” Moraes wrote in his ruling dismissing the tech jargon heavy MAGA “Cyber Ninjas”-style bullshit no doubt fed to Bolsonaro by the veterans of a similarly failed election overturn effort.

Hungarian dictator Viktor Orban on Thursday announced his country’s parliament will earn their Kremlin paycheck and delay their approval of Sweden and Finland’s accession to NATO membership until next year, AFP reports. Only Hungary and Turkey remain to greenlight the two Baltic nations’ joining the alliance, unsurprisingly the two sketchiest and least democratic members of the bloc.

Turkey could be given a little more leeway given their unique position on NATO’s eastern frontier bordering Iran, Iraq, and Syria, as well as controlling the gateway to the Black Sea. Hungary, however isn’t really bringing much to the table and it shouldn’t be a tough call to simply kick them the fuck out of NATO and the European Union, or at the very least suspend them from both blocs until they depose Orban and undertake major reforms. Enough of this shit.

Thanksgiving is a holiday to remember what’s important and to be thankful for it–it’s literally in the name.  Most people will gather with friends and/or family, celebrating the love and happiness they’ve experienced throughout the year.  For the Trumps, though, it’s different:  they’re thankful for the money dupes pay them. The customers, the guests, the residents at their properties, the Trumps are thankful that they’re supporting the family’s lifestyle by paying inflated prices for Big Box store products served on silver plated trays.  “We love having you stay at our properties. We operate some of the best hotels in the world, best golf courses, residential buildings, commercial buildings. We strive so hard to run the best properties on earth and I think we really nail it.”  Happy Holiday, Ewic.

Writer E Jean Carroll on Thursday filed an upgraded lawsuit against disgraced former President Trump for forcible rape, minutes after a new New York State law removing time limitations for victims of sexual assault to sue their assailants took effect, the Associated Press reports.

Carroll’s lawyer filed the complaint electronically as the Adult Survivor’s Act, which temporarily lifted the state’s usual deadlines for litigating sexual assault kicked in. Carroll also has an ongoing defamation lawsuit against the fat former President which is tied up in appeals courts as the Orange Warlord tries to claim he was acting in his official capacity of Commander in Chief of the United States when he called Carroll a liar over her accusation in 2018.

UK Defense Secretary Ben Wallace tells the Daily Beast that Russian dictator Vladimir Putin’s army is looking at further setbacks on the battlefield in Ukraine as winter looms.

“Given the advantage the Ukrainians have in equipment training and quality of their personnel against the demoralized, poorly trained, poorly equipped Russians, it would be in the Ukraine’s interest to maintain momentum through the winter. They have 300,000 pieces of arctic warfare kit, from the international community,” said Wallace, urging Kyiv to “keep up the pressure, keep up the momentum… A Russian unit was recently deployed with no food and no socks, and not many guns. That is catastrophic for a person going in the field… The Russians have scale, but are not very good. Well, most of the good ones are dead. They are a meat grinder – they shove them in the meat grinder – and use massive quantities of artillery. Only a nation that does not care for its own people could send 100,000 of its own people to be either dead, injured, or deserted.”

Apparently going for an al Qaeda hostage circa 2003 vibe, Trump lawyer (and also spokesperson for MAGA Inc.) Alina Habba bemoans how Thanksgiving is now a holiday where families argue, claiming that arguments at Thanksgiving dinner are “un-American and unconstitutional.”  While Habba acknowledges that political arguments have increased, she fails to acknowledge the need for MAGAts to “own the libs” in all situations as much of the cause.

Sarah Palin didn’t put stupid into politics.  Before Palin, there was W, the walking faux pas/war criminal.  And before W there was Dan Quayle and his boyish good looks… and little else.  There were many stupid politicians before Quayle, too.  But what Palin did was different than the Stupid before her.

Palin was the first politician to commercialize her stupidity.  She was the first to recognize that even people who wonder out loud, “What the fuck did she just say?” are still paying attention to her, so if she can capture their eyeballs, she can use her stupidity to capture their dollars.

And she didn’t just commercialize it; she capitalized on it.  She embraced it.  She made it her brand:  “Yep, I’m dumb.  I’m not as smart as some of those elites in Washington, but I’m smart enough to be your leader, and you should vote for me–and send me your money–to stick it to the elites.” 

Alaskan incumbents Senator Lisa Murkowski, Congresswoman Mary Peltola, and Governor Mike Dunleavy all were declared winners of their respective races by the State Division of Elections on Wednesday, with the Murkowski win yet another loss for Trump as she defeated insane MAGA asshole challenger Kelly Tshitkablahblahblah by a pretty comfortable 53.5% to 46.5% margin.