Democratic Washington Congresswoman Pramila Jayapal laid into Republican Texas Representative Chip Roy for patronizing comments during a committee hearing.  “I am also very offended that anybody on your side would call me a murderer for making a choice about my health and my body that you cannot even begin to understand,” Jayapal said.  “So please, do not be paternalistic towards us as we make choices that are our choices.”

Winning pic.twitter.com/SSLhpnGXGs

— Matt Schlapp (@mschlapp) November 4, 2021

An obvious dig at Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s, infamous “Tax the Rich” dress worn to the September Metropolitan Museum of Art annual Gala in the headline netting the outspoken NYC liberal at least 26 different articles on FoxNews.com in under 24 hours after the event is a tough record to beat for Ms I-gave-birth-in-a-truck-so-what-do-you-sinful-homos-know-about-parenthood, but let’s see how it goes. Photo posted by CPAC douchebag Matt Schlapp.

I’ve been studying information warfare intensively for the last six years, and feel I’ve developed a bit of a knack for political spin. In this brief editorial I will offer a quick rundown of the kind of messaging that I believe Democrats should be circulating regarding the Youngkin win in Virginia, and a brief explanation of why I believe that kind of messaging would be effective for Democrats. Following is the kind of script that Democrats should be using to respond to the Youngkin win.

“Glenn Youngkin’s win in the Virginia Governor’s race is a mixed blessing for the GOP. Numerous outlets have noted how although Youngkin did accept Trump’s endorsement, he never painted himself as an ardent Trump loyalist. When Trump loyalists held a rally to support Youngkin that included saying the Pledge of Allegiance to a flag that was carried at the January 6th insurrection, Youngkin later responded to that action as “weird and wrong“, and condemned the actions of the January 6th insurrectionists. Youngkin’s win is a mixed blessing for the GOP because it means that in order to win back suburban voters, there has to be a decided shift away from Trumpism, and that ultimately means that the two Republicans that should be most encouraged by Youngkin’s win are Adam Kinzinger and Liz Cheney. Not surprisingly, Kinzinger, who is currently one of only two Republicans who volunteered to be on the House January 6th committee, recently declared that he’s strongly considering running for President in 2024. People who have made their way in politics by being slavish Trump sycophants won’t be able to thread that needle the way that Youngkin did.

“A group of gunmen opened fire Thursday afternoon at a five-star seaside resort in Cancun packed with American vacationers, according to Mexican officials and eyewitnesses. The terrifying incident reportedly began shortly after 3 p.m., when armed men descended on the Hyatt Ziva Riviera Cancun resort and began shooting. In a statement, police in Quintana Roo attributed the gunfire to ‘armed individuals’ who ‘took the lives of two men who are presumed to be drug dealers,’ and no tourists were ‘seriously injured or kidnapped.’ Vacationers said the shooting sent them scrambling. Randle Roper, whose company, Vacaya, organizes LGBTQ package tours, is staying at the property with a group of travelers from the U.S. He confirmed to The Daily Beast that there was a shooter on the grounds, and he and the other guests were sheltering in place” the Daily Beast reports.

Noted gun rights champion, frequent Cancun visitor, and tough-on-anything-Mexicans Senator Ted Cruz was not present at the resort during the assault, though it should be assumed he would have high-fived the gunmen for their display of individual liberties after the shooting if he were.

LIVE: I'm on the Senate floor today because it's time we make Daylight Saving Time permanent. Watch and retweet if you agree. https://t.co/Ftq0mRl3ge

— Senator Patty Murray (@PattyMurray) November 4, 2021

“Congressional investigators probing the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol are examining the contacts between one of the rioters who breached the Capitol and state-level GOP officials who worked with former President Donald Trump as he attempted to overturn the 2020 election. The rioter, who interviewed with the committee twice in the past week, described knowledge of contacts between GOP officials in a key state Trump lost and allies of the former president in the weeks leading up to the Jan. 6 attack. The person interviewed was one of the 650-plus defendants charged in the attack, and discussed those contacts in a voluntary interview with congressional investigators.”

“A source familiar with the previously unreported interviews said committee investigators asked the defendant to return for a second interview after discussing details about these pre-Jan. 6 interactions. Questions from investigators ranged from the defendant’s knowledge of those who organized travel to Washington for the Jan. 6 event as well as details about the preparation of legal affidavits in support of Trump’s false claims of voter fraud” Politico reports.

Calling it now. The “key state Trump lost” was Pennsylvania and the target is PA state Senator Doug Mastriano. That son of a bitch was there and he bussed dozens of rioters to the Capitol.

Exiled from respected news outlets and Fox News, Meat Gaetz must go on streaming services like Real America’s Voice to spout this font of delusion:  “The woke left is far more racist than any element of politics on the right.”

“The U.S. Department of Justice is suing Texas over its new voting law, passed earlier this year in the Legislature. The Texas voting law will ‘disenfranchise eligible Texas citizens who seek to exercise their right to vote, including voters with limited English proficiency, voters with disabilities, elderly voters, members of the military deployed away from home, and American citizens residing outside of the country,’ the suit claims” – Texas Tribune.

A vicious brontosaurus stops in for a fast food snack!

We already know what the right’s response to the piece is going to be, if they even read it. “Dinosaur Portal Theory is fake news” or “Just another media witch hunt” or even “Dinosaurs were nice in the Bible though”, which will show their utter disconnection with the facts on the ground. Dinosaur Portal Theory (DPT), first advanced in an obscure 1988 Topps trading card series titled Dinosaurs Attack!, posits that there’s an alternate universe in which dinosaurs were not wiped out by a meteor impact and/or mass volcanic eruption approximately 65 million years ago, surviving the eons since, and could possibly somehow enter our universe through an inter-dimensional portal to feast on humans. You don’t need to have seen the series to understand that could have an absolutely devastating impact on our economy and infrastructure if it were to happen.

Even if one could somehow credibly argue with 110% certainty that a herd of carnivorous triceratops would never suddenly appear and go on a rampage through a crowded shopping mall in real life, it still wouldn’t make any political sense for Republicans to dismiss it. Screaming at persuadable voters that they’re full of shit is not a winning campaign strategy. Neither is mocking sarcastic, assholish white male voters who can’t properly define Dinosaur Portal Theory. In fact, every time someone brings up DPT, the pushback from Republicans will be to ask, “Name one time a pterodactyl suddenly came and snatched a baseball outfielder in the middle of a game at Wrigley Field,” and then to reply “See? You just made that up” when an obviously made up example is offered, as if that puts the concern over DPT to rest. The dinosaurs could strike at any moment.

What’s more “kitchen table” of an issue than literally a fucking velociraptor suddenly appearing on one’s kitchen table while your family is eating dinner? You think a man-eating monster like that gives a shit if you’ve declared your town a “sanctuary city” for unborn fetuses or banned Sharia law there? Do Republicans think a tyrannosaur looks at a migrant caravan and sees a threat to national security or does he see a Mexican buffet? And if they’re so worried about “replacement theory” then how about you start worrying about humans being replaced as the dominant species on earth by inter-dimensional dinosaurs! DPT is real, it’s a real threat to our education system and every other system we have on top of that. People are concerned about it. Republicans need to start listening to those concerns. Calling us freaks is not going to win our votes.

Associated Press:  “Colin and Donna Craig-Brown were weeding their garden in New Zealand when Colin’s hoe struck something huge just beneath the soil’s surface.  As the couple knelt down and began digging around the object, Colin wondered if it was some kind of strange fungal growth, a giant puffball. After Colin pried it out with his garden fork, he scratched away a bit of the skin and tasted it.  A potato.

‘We couldn’t believe it,’ Donna said. ‘It was just huge.’  And not exactly pretty. Donna describes its appearance as more of an ugly, mutant look.  But it’s quite possibly the largest potato on record. When the couple lugged it into their garage and put it on their old set of scales, it weighed in at a remarkable 7.9 kilograms (17.4 pounds). That’s equal to a couple of sacks of regular potatoes, or one small dog.

“In the weeks since their unusual find on Aug. 30, the couple’s potato has become something of a celebrity around their small farm near Hamilton. They’ve named the potato Doug, after the way it was unearthed, and Colin even built a small cart to tow Doug around.  ‘We put a hat on him. We put him on Facebook, taking him for a walk, giving him some sunshine,’ Colin said. ‘It’s all a bit of fun. It’s amazing what entertains people.’

Not going to clip any of this because it’s pretty disturbing, but the Insider.com account detailing some of Barstool Sports founder Dave Portnoy’s interactions with women is basically what you’d expect for a guy who was profiled in a Politico jerkoff piece titled “How Republicans Became the ‘Barstool’ Party” and even interviewed Trump at the White House in 2020.

Washington Post:  “The Manhattan District Attorney has convened a second long-term grand jury to hear evidence about the Trump Organization’s financial practices, and potentially to vote on criminal charges, according to people with knowledge of the matter.

“An earlier grand jury — convened this spring in Manhattan — previously handed down felony indictments against two Trump companies and Trump’s longtime chief financial officer Allen Weisselberg, charging them with tax evasion. It is unclear if that grand jury is still hearing evidence about the Trump Organization.  The new grand jury was seated last week, and is expected to meet three days a week over six months, people familiar with the matter said. It was expected to hear evidence on Thursday, meeting in Manhattan’s Surrogate’s Court — usually a forum for disputes over the estates of the deceased — because the criminal court buildings are jammed with a rush of post-pandemic trials.

“One person familiar with the matter said the second grand jury was expected to examine how former president Donald Trump’s company valued its assets.  That appears to be a separate issue than the one described in indictments from the first grand jury, which has dealt with allegations that Weisselberg and other Trump executives evaded taxes on their pay by systematically hiding some of their compensation from the IRS. Both Weisselberg and the two companies have pleaded not guilty.  The second grand jury’s term indicates that it could outlast District Attorney Cyrus R. Vance Jr. (D) — who leaves office at year’s end — and extend into the term of newly elected District Attorney Alvin Bragg (D).”

“I’m disappointed that I’m being used as an example in my incarceration. Because I’m a public person and I have a Twitter account, I’m being punished for that. Because the media was doing what y’all are doing right now, I’m being punished for this. And it’s actually causing my incarceration and I think that is a travesty. I think everybody should be able to tweet without being persecuted and treated like crap. So watch what you tweet, because if you tweet, you can go to jail. It’s a free county and I’m allowed to say – you know – it’s free speech” – Jenna Ryan via JoeMyGod.

“I will issue my opinion and ruling expeditiously,” U.S. District Judge Tanya S. Chutkan said Thursday after hearing arguments from Trump lawyer Justin Clark (also a Trump 2020 campaign lawyer and theoretically a material witness), the House counsel Doug Letter, and the National Archives represented by Justice Department lawyer Elizabeth Shapiro. The hearing did not go great for Team Trump as the judge appeared to mostly side with Team America, a handful of quibbles from her regarding the overall breadth of the document request aside. Read more at TPM.

First time jobless claims in the United States fell to its lowest level in 20 months, to 284,750, more than 13,000 lower than the previous week and an encouraging sign that employers are recovering from the pandemic slowdown, CNBC reports.

The weekly first time claims number 284,750, the lowest level since March 2020.  One year previous, the first time unemployment claims were at 791,000.  Another sign that the economy is recovering:  Continuing claims, which run a week behind the headline number, declined 134,000 to just over 2.1 million.

“The fifth straight weekly drop in jobless claims, to a new pandemic low, is consistent with all the other evidence pointing to labor market tightness,” wrote Ian Shepherdson, chief economist at Pantheon Macroeconomics. “With demand reviving post-Delta, the bar for layoffs is high and rising. Claims appear to be on course to reach the pre-Covid level early next year.”

“Police shot dead two bulls that were running along the M1 in South Yorkshire. The motorway was closed for about an hour-and-a-half when the animals were spotted loose on the carriageway near Sheffield, alarming drivers. A car and trailer that had been carrying them overturned, National Highways said. Firearms officers rushed to the scene and killed each animal with a single shot, South Yorkshire Police said. A statement read: ‘We were deployed to the M1 at around 9am on Thursday 4 November following reports that trailer had overturned and two bulls were loose in the carriageway. As the bulls posed a danger to life and property, the decision sadly had to be taken to destroy them both. The road was closed for around 90 minutes'” – The Independent.

Definitely not going to jail. Sorry I have blonde hair white skin a great job a great future and I'm not going to jail. Sorry to rain on your hater parade. I did nothing wrong

— Jenna Ryan (@dotjenna) March 26, 2021

Private Jet Karen Capitol rioter and up-and-coming Christian pop star Jenna Ryan was sentenced to 60 days in a federal prison and fined $1,000 for her participation in the January 6th MAGA insurrection, the Dallas Observer reports. “I just want to say that I am very sorry. There’s really not words to describe. I was foolish, and I made a mistake, and I learned from that mistake, like a thousand lessons” Ryan told the court prior to the sentencing. Her falling heart indeed.

Some people lost power today and think that it was because of the Texas power grid.

Almost always, a power outage is the result of a problem with your local power provider, not ERCOT.

As this graph shows, ERCOT provided abundant power supply during every hour of the day today. pic.twitter.com/kZmvfY3I20

— Greg Abbott (@GregAbbott_TX) November 4, 2021

“A juror in the Kyle Rittenhouse homicide trial was dismissed Thursday morning after making a joke to a law enforcement official about the police shooting of Jacob Blake, a Black man. According to Kenosha County Assistant District Attorney Thomas Binger, the juror, an elderly white man who uses an electric scooter, said, ‘Why did the Kenosha police shoot Jacob Blake seven times; they ran out of bullets.’ Binger asked the juror be dismissed. Judge Bruce Schroeder spoke to the juror and dismissed him. ‘I’ve talked quite a bit about public confidence in the result of the trial,’ Schroeder said after dismissing the juror. ‘It is clear the appearance of bias is present, and it would seriously undermine the results of the case.’ On his way out of court the man told Schroeder the joke ‘had nothing to do with the case'” – WPR.

Learn about the most common causes of electrical fires, and how you can help prevent fires before they start. See more #FDNYSmart tips at https://t.co/NpwdRdDfdw pic.twitter.com/l1mSOt8Tf6

— FDNY (@FDNY) November 4, 2021

Oh yeah smart guy? How the hell did you manage to record this video and post on your fascist thought police bureau’s Twitter page if you didn’t use electricity? How do your giant red urban assault vehicles with their obnoxious epileptic seizure-inducing flashing lights and insanely loud sirens with endless different tones that scare the fuck out of people work without wires powering them, you hypocritical bastards? We’ve seen more than enough of this “rules for thee, electricity for me” bullshit coming from this taxpayer-funded commie propaganda bureau. Defund the FDNY.