Baby-food pouches make parenting easier, writes @yeahyeahyasmin. So why does it feel so bad to feed one to your kid? https://t.co/T2fLBW0RUL

— The Atlantic (@TheAtlantic) March 29, 2024

There’s a hidden danger in the declarative verbiage used in The Atlantic’s headlines and sub-heds that one non-expert says indicates that the constant neuroticism and ruminative babbling in the magazine’s pieces is getting kind of fucking old and maybe the writers should go outside sometimes. Studies that don’t actually exist show that if you can slap together 800 words about the social costs of a certain popular brand of multigrain bread that people are buying at Trader Joe’s then you would probably benefit from self-medicating with whiskey and muscle relaxers.

The Atlantic’s subscriber base may benefit as well if the writers would just lighten the hell up and stop printing tedious worry porn like “What might feel like good parenting in the short term might, paradoxically, threaten a kid’s ability to make safe choices in the long term.” But as long as people keep paying $79.99 a year to hear two of their experts “discuss what happens when Americans lose faith in the experts” on an exclusive podcast, don’t expect them to just fucking chill out.

An Eastern Colorado Republican Committee late Thursday selected former gubernatorial candidate and wife-beater Greg Lopez as their nominee for the June 25th special election to replace now-former Congressman Ken Buck, the Denver Post reports. The good news for current 3rd District QAnon fan Congresswoman and complete jerkoff Lauren Boebert is that Lopez announced afterward he won’t be running in the regular primary on the same day and would only serve for the less than six months remaining in the term in the likely event he’s elected. Which makes Boebert’s carpetbagging move into the 4th that much easier to pull off. There are still eight other candidates in the field and she can probably just cruise on name recognition if there’s no consolidation.

Bankrupt alcoholic shitbrain Rudy Guiliani told a court Thursday that forcing the sale of his Palm Beach condo would “be forced to incur expenses for alternative housing” and would likely “join the ranks of the homeless” since he’s already agreed to sell his Manhattan home to satisfy debts including a $148 million defamation judgment a jury awarded in December to former Georgia election workers Ruby Freeman and Shae Moss over his 2020 conspiracy bullshit, the Independent reports.

Rudy’s filing also claimed that he needs the home to “operate the Podcast from if he is to earn money therefrom” and the money he earns from the podcast “would only serve to benefit creditors.”

Rep. Tim Burchett, told Newsmax that House Oversight Chair James Comer's invitation to President Joe Biden to testify before the committee is a serious offer, but he doesn't think the president will take him up on it.https://t.co/hzJRNxqFok https://t.co/J8yA1cHdJ6

— NEWSMAX (@NEWSMAX) March 29, 2024

If we’re talking about doing the work to boost their candidate in the presidential election and flexing the power to set an investigative agenda they have with a majority, Senate Dems have been utterly chickenshit in comparison to the House GOP this Congress – “comparison” doing a lot of lifting there because there is none. At least something would have been nice to see.

That being said, it would be fucking stupid for a Dem Senate committee chair to invite fat former President Trump to come testify publicly about his corruption, knowing full well that he wouldn’t show up, the only “victory” there being able to say that he’s too much of coward to face them. Far too few of the Dem voter base would give a shit. Obviously the incentives are different for the House GOP, that in a vacuum they can actually get the kind of favorable coverage from Newsmax from it.

But this isn’t happening in a vacuum, it’s happening after 15 months of just absolutely humiliating failure and simply further telegraphing their weakness and impotence. The returns have diminished to nothing and it’s at the point where the MAGA base are beyond fed up with them.

Axios’s coverage of a new Public Religion Research Institute survey, headlined “Americans continue to lose their religion as GOP pushes it,” seems to be very strongly suggesting that the Republican Party’s batshittery is singularly responsible for the ongoing decline of religious identity.

“The findings suggest that Republicans who focus on evangelical priorities – such as former President Trump, who’s now hawking Bibles, and House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La), who flies a flag favored by Christian nationalists outside his office – are preaching to a loyal but dwindling audience,” they write about the collapse of church attendance that is particularly pronounced among Americans from Catholic backgrounds, which would make sense given how the US’s political geography concentrates a lot of its Papists in Blue States. PRRI CEO Melissa Deckman says another major factor is younger Americans turned off by “Christian” hostility to LGBTQ folks, that 60 percent of respondents under 30 “cite the treatments of LGBTQ as a reason they stop going to church.”

That was about as close as the survey’s content itself got to politics. It was Axios that made the connection to Mike Johnson’s Jesus-themed assclownery and Trump’s Bible infomercial bullshit.

“Leaked video shows Hood County Constable Scott London, Hood County GOP Chair Steve Biggers and Hood County GOP Chair candidate Greg Harrell attending a meeting held by Abolish Abortion Texas where they supported the death penalty for women who seek abortions or use IVF, including pregnant minors. London and Harrel have also signed onto a pledge from the same group vowing to abolish all circumstances of abortion care in Texas. The video was obtained by Hood County Democrats Chair Adrienne Quinn Martin and took place at a True Texas Project chapter’s meeting in Granbury, Texas. The event was hosted by Monica Brown – who is known for her attempts to ban books she deems inappropriate – and originally streamed from her Facebook page in January.”

“Paul Brown, who is the Director of Policy for Abolish Abortion Texas (AATX) said that IVF is a form of abortion and that when a fertilized egg is destroyed it should be considered murder, saying ‘Their lives [women] don’t matter any more than the babies’ they are killing.’ Brown also said how the group is against basic contraception pointing to the emergency contraception pill Plan B, saying that it ‘terminates or kills a baby prior to implantation – which is an abortion’ Brown went on to say that they will ‘never be okay with abortions in the instance of incest or rape’ with several audience members suggesting that pregnant woman and doctors who perform abortions should be ‘held accountable’ to the highest extent of the law. The True Texas Project, which is a separate group that hosted the event, has hosted several events with Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton and Senator Ted Cruz, was labeled as an extremist group by the Southern Poverty Law Center and has deep ties to white nationalist Nick Fuentes,” says a press release from the Texas Democratic Party.

Another shining example of "colored communism" in America. https://t.co/O9KXzy1ubn

— Michigan GOP (@MIGOP) March 29, 2024

Not a good look for a state party that, for all its obvious manifold other flaws, just fired its Black female chairwoman and replaced her with a white man. Or a good look for any state party for that matter. Might as well link a screenshot here juuuuuust in case they do end up pulling it.

Republican Virginia Governor Glenn Youngkin vetoed a popular bill passed by the Democratic-led legislature that would allow retail sales of marijuana, apparently because the legislature killed a planned major sport-complex development in northern Virginia Youngkin championed, Politico reports.

Virginia allows for medical cannabis sales and already allows recreational users to grow their personal plants thanks to a law passed in 2021, but the law required another legislative step to legalize retail sales.  That happened thanks to Democrats taking over the legislature earlier this year.

In the meantime, Youngkin had negotiated with Monumental Sports owner Ted Leonsis, the owner of the Washington Capitols (NHL), Wizards (NBA) and Mystics (WNBA), to move his entire operation to a new bespoke entertainment facility in the DC suburbs.  At a cost of $2 billion.  Two billion dollars the legislature had not appropriated.  The deal fell through; days later, Leonsis extended the lease of his DC facilities until 2050; and Youngkin kills a popular bill favored by the Democrats out of revenge.  This is why we can’t have nice things.

One of the key disappointing witnesses in the House GOP’s effort to find something, anything, they could try to hand an impeachment on, Tony Bobulinski, filed a defamation lawsuit against Jessica Tarlov, the liberal commentator on The Five, a program on the Fox Republican propaganda network.

According to the Daily Beast, Bobulinski objected to Tarlov stating that his legal fees were being paid by Donald Trump’s Super PAC.  Tarlov subsequently read a statement clarifying that while the firm has received funds from a Trump Super PAC, there was no direct connection to Bobulinski’s representation.

In a completely rational letter, Bobulinski’s lawyer Stefan Passantino wrote to the network: “To be clear, we demand a complete retraction and apology by Ms. Tarlov AT THE TOP OF TODAY’S SHOW while showing this photograph in which Ms. Tarlov clearly states that she explicitly ‘apologizes to Tony Bobulinski and Stefan Passantino for making a false claim on the air which harmed their reputations.’ Ms. Tarlov must further state, ‘To be clear, it appears that Mr. Bobulinski has always paid all of his legal bills and there is no evidence that Mr. Passantino or his law firm accepted money from anyone other than Mr. Bobulinski for his representation.’ These statements must be made without the petulant innuendo or further attempted mental gymnastics as we saw from her yesterday.  Absent such statements, both he and Mr. Passantino will continue to be harmed.”

Never a group to fear pushing unpopular policies in an election year, Republicans from eleven states filed suit against the Biden Administration to revoke the Saving on a Valuable Education program, a student loan forgiveness program that eliminated payments for 150,000 people who had 10-year-old loans of less than $12,000 and reduced payments for tens of thousands of others.

According to the Washington Post, the states, led by Kansas Attorney General and guy who was assigned by Donald Trump to find all the illegal voters from the 2016 election (but never did) Kris Kobach, claim Biden overstepped his authority to eliminate debt or lower payments without ever explaining why eliminating the student debt would be a bad thing.

Kobach relies on the same legal arguments he used to undermine earlier Biden attempts for widespread loan forgiveness.  “In completely brazen fashion the president pressed ahead and implemented another version of the student loan forgiveness program,” Kobach crowed in a statement after filing the lawsuit, which was joined by the AGs of Alabama, Alaska, Idaho, Iowa,  Louisiana, Montana, Nebraska, South Carolina, Texas, and Utah.

An appeals court in Texas overturned the conviction of Crystal Mason, a Black woman who cast a provision ballot in the 2016 election because she mistakenly voted while under federal supervision for a 2012 tax fraud conviction, negating a five-year prison sentence, the ACLU of Texas reports.

Mason, who was not legally allowed to vote in Texas although she would be eligible for the GOP presidential nomination, claims she did not receive the letter from the county attorney’s office informing her she was ineligible because she was in jail when it was mailed.  Even though more than 12,000 people had voted using provisional ballots in 2014 and 2016 with more than 85% being ruled invalid or ineligible, Mason, a Black woman, was the only person prosecuted.

Critics said Mason’s punishment fell out of line with other similar cases, particularly various Donald Trump voters who were arrested after submitting multiple ballots, including a man who forged his dead mother’s signature; he was only sentenced to probation.

[Note:  Transcript annotated to highlight relevant parts.]. “Man, you watch that video and like, sp…sped up and it’s like, there’s the power outage and there’s the first correction and it’s like, well, it’s not quite perfect on the [indecipherable] so there’s another power outage and it ends up being perfect to hit the thing dead square.  I mean, that’s critical infrastructure.  Like, I don’t know about you guys, but I mean, any… any diesel mechanics watching right now.  I don’t know much,” Donald Trump, Jr. finally admits before continuing, “but I know that these big diesel engines, let’s just call it, like, really fuckin’ reliable and it seems odd that one would go out, that they could go out just conveniently and also conveniently within a couple hundred yards of a critical infrastructure bridge that’s there for transporting hazardous waste in one of our biggest port areas in the count– I dunno folks.”

Happening right now. Three busses just loaded up with illegal invaders at Detroit Metro. Anyone have any idea where they’re headed with their police escort? @petehoekstra pic.twitter.com/3xFhIP1jf1

— Matt Maddock (@matthewmaddock) March 28, 2024

We’ve covered a lot of the antics of the Maddock clan here, from Matt’s secessionist speech to his ouster from the state GOP legislative conference to his wife and one-time GOP state co-chair Meshawn’s plight as a criminal fake elector in Michigan.  But Matt Maddock–who’s a Trump-endorsed Super Duper MAGA according to his profile–took his hysteria to a whole new level Wednesday night by alerting his 2,000 Twitter followers that the dang migrants were flying into Detroit.  But he should have put two-and-two together when the migrants were unusually tall and Detroit was hosting a round of the NCAA basketball tournament. Twitter’s community notes correctly identifies the group not as migrants, but the basketball team from Gonzaga University. But, nah, they’re definitely migrants. Very tall migrants.

Hearing that incumbent Democratic President Joe Biden is expected to bring in $25 million during a fundraiser Thursday night, adjudicated rapist and Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump’s team is now touting an upcoming event where, they claim, they’ll net more for the Bible-hawking sneaker salesman, according to ABC News.

“The response to our fundraising efforts has been overwhelming, and we’ve raised over $33 million so far,” billionaire John Paulson, the host of the April 6th event in Palm Beach asserted in a statement. “There is massive support amongst a broad spectrum of donors. The dinner is relatively small in nature, and we are almost at our cap.”

Trump will want to drive donations at the event:  five percent of the take will go to Trump’s SuperPAC, which is footing the bill for Trump’s various legal teams in his multiple criminal indictments.

For the first time in more than a quarter century, the Office of Management and Budget has updated the way it categorizes people’s race and ethnicity including giving people the ability to choose more than one option, the Washington Post reports.

Federal forms will also include an option for “Middle Eastern or North African” heritage, the first addition to the listed races since 1997.  The changes will be used on all federal forms including US Census forms and the more-regularly-conducted American Community Survey, which is used to track employment statistics and other data.

Since he testified last week before the hilariously incompetent effort by the House GOP to weaponize its slim majority, Lev Parnas has been releasing evidence and documentation to support his account, which effectively ended any claimed legitimacy into Republicans’ investigations into Hunter Biden and Ukraine.  The information links key players in a conservative plot to smear Joe Biden prior to the 2020 presidential election.

Posted on his social media account, Parnas included the video above showing Trump lawyer and future co-defendant Rudy Giuliani on a call purportedly with Viktor Shokin, the former Prosecutor General of Ukraine, who tell Giuliani that he never found evidence of anyone Giuliani was investigating receiving kickbacks or bribes–something that directly undermines claims Giuliani himself and Donald Trump made later. 

Retired Capitol Police Sergeant Aquilino Gonell on Thursday vented to CBS’s Scott MacFarlane about fat former President Trump’s campaign stop at the wake for slain NYPD officer Jonathan Diller.

“This is the same person who calls the rioters ‘patriots, political prisoners, and hostages’ instead of calling them for what they are… convicted criminals… Imagine Trump calling the criminal who killed this officer in NYC ‘a hostage’ or anything but a criminal. That’s what he is doing to the January 6 criminals who beat officers and breach the Capitol,” said Gonell. “The death of the officer in New York is tragic and reminds all of us of the sacrifices and commitment the men and women in uniform make every day… I hope the full extent of the law is applied to bring this officer’s killer to justice.”

A 22-year-old man who claims the marijuana he smokes must have been laced with an unknown narcotic stabbed a dozen people in Rockford, Illinois on Thursday, killing four and injuring seven, NBC News reports.  Officials say Christian Soto stabbed and ran over with a car one victim, the friend he was smoking with, then stabbed the man’s mother.  He then–allegedly–went into various houses stabbing and hitting people including a mail carrier, who died.

Soto entered a house through an unlocked back door and grabbed a softball bat, which he used to beat three teenaged girls watching movies in the basement.  One of the girls, a 15-year-old, was hit and killed trying to protect her sister and friend.

Unwilling to mix with the masses, middling podcaster and member of the US Senate Ted Cruz (R-Quintana Roo) pushed an amendment into the Federal Aviation Authority reauthorization bill that would provide armed police escorts through airports for political figures who have received legitimate threats, as well as protection for some of their families and staff, the Guardian reports.

While he claims the measure is needed because public officials–including justices, judges (which are essentially the same) and lawmakers (like himself)–are facing increasing threats, Cruz may look back on his 2021 walk through a Texas airport as he traveled on a last-minute jaunt to a luxury resort in Cancun while the rest of the state which elected him suffered under a severe winter storm as impetus for his desire for police to clear his way.

“During the 118th Congress, the House Committee on Oversight and Accountability has been investigating influence peddling conducted by you and your family. The Committee has accounted for over $24 million that has flowed from foreign sources to you, your family, and their business associates. The Committee has identified no legitimate services to merit such lucrative payments.”

“You have repeatedly denied playing any role in your family’s business activities, but the Committee has amassed evidence – including bank records and witness testimony – that wholly contradicts your position on these matters. Additionally, the White House has taken a position hostile to the Committee’s investigation and refuses to release certain information or make available witnesses to testify regarding issues relevant to the ongoing impeachment inquiry currently authorized by the full House of Representatives. In light of the yawning gap between your public statements and the evidence assembled by the Committee, as well as the White House’s obstruction, it is in the best interest of the American people for you to answer questions from Members of Congress directly, and I hereby invite you to do so,” writes House Oversight Chairbilly James Comer in a letter to President Biden, just so he can scream “cover-up!” when Biden fucks off.