“So one Corrupt, Radical Left Judge in New York, a Trump hater a the highest level, can disobey and laugh at the Appellate Division Ruling that gives me victory, and confiscate New York property from me that took a lifetime of hard work to accumulate and build? It sounds like COMMUNISM to me! THERE SHOULD BE NO FINE, I DID NOTHING WRONG. RELEASE THE GAG ORDER ENGORON!” fat former President Trump posted on Truth Social, still caterwauling about the nightmare he’s facing.

Meanwhile MSNBC’s Katie Phang reports that the New York State Appellate Court division has granted Attorney General Letitia James’s request to file a “surreply” to the orange scumbag’s motion to waive part or all of the bond – in which we think she saying she’s introducing new evidence of Donald’s guilt in the matter as a means of further burying him and closing the door on the appeal.

The Russian and Chinese ambassadors to the United Nations on Friday spiked US Secretary of State Tony Blinken’s resolution declaring a ceasefire in Gaza to be an “imperative,” the AP reports.

The House Freedom Caucasians will screech into the microphone for about 45 minutes to an hour on Friday morning to protest Speaker Mike Johnson sucking it up and governing with Democrats.

The “Border911” organization founded by former Trump Administration ICE chief Tom Homan, purportedly founded to “educate” swing voters to “make the right decision” in the 2024 election is blatantly violating federal prohibitions on 501(c)(3) organizations favoring or opposing candidates for public office, ABC News concludes after examining the group’s propaganda for five seconds.

“No one did more to secure this country than Donald Trump, I’m a Trump guy,” Homan said in a video on Border911’s website that disappeared after ABC started asking questions. There’s also that they’re holding an event at Mar-a-Lago to raise the cash needed to fund their tour of the swing states to “educate” voters about the border. The specific scam here is that while they’re registered as a 501(c)(3) “charity” the contributions – as in tickets to their Trump-headlined April 4th circlejerk at Mar-a-Lago ranging from $1,200 to $100,000 – are tax-deductible. If they converted to a 501(c)(4) like they’re supposed to then they could advocate for Trump but the tax savings would be gone.

What the fuck is with that name too? Seems like it was colored within a millimeter of the lines of plausible deniability that “911” is meant solely to allude to “emergency,” but it’s hard to escape the feeling they were taking it further by not just calling it “BorderEmergency.” Or if that was too many characters and they wanted to focus on informing people then “Border411” would’ve worked fine. It just kind of seems like they want some people to “mistakenly” pronounce it verbally as “Border Nine-Eleven” since, if you watch Fox News and/or read the New York Post regularly, you think the “border crisis” is like another 9/11 attack happening every single hour of every single fucking day.

Soon-to-be-ex-Congressman Ken Buck on Thursday told Bloomberg’s Erik Wasson that the furniture in his office was packed up and removed by parties unknown before he actually effected his resignation, which we guess is not official until the session ends Friday. Buck doesn’t actually know what happened, even though it’s pretty goddamned obvious this was retaliation from Speaker Mike Johnson and/or his minions Steve Scalise and Elise Stefanik for resigning abruptly.

Kind of petty and impotent. Like if this is the worst you can do to the guy as revenge for giving up and walking out on the dysfunctional shitshow you created then why do it at all?

“Since 2:00 am yesterday, March 20, 2024, law enforcement agencies across Idaho have investigated and searched for escaped inmate Skylar Meade and shooting suspect Nicholas Umphenour. Just after 2:00 pm today, March 21, 2024, law enforcement located and arrested both males in Twin Falls, Idaho after a vehicle pursuit involving multiple law enforcement agencies.”

“The suspects were taken into custody with no further incident or injury. When the investigation expanded statewide, the Idaho State Police (ISP) began the collaborative effort among law enforcement agencies and the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Following tips and investigative leads, authorities believe the suspects fled northbound from the Treasure Valley to north central Idaho. Through their investigation, detectives located the Honda Civic, used in the escape, near Leland, Idaho. Additionally, law enforcement is investigating two homicides, in separate locations of Nez Perce and Clearwater counties, that are potentially tied to the escape.”

“Both homicides involve adult male victims and detectives are actively investigating. No further information is available for release on the homicides and the county coroner will provide identity as well as the official cause and manner of death. Law enforcement believes the capture was successful due to the hundreds of tips from the public and the multiple responding law enforcement agencies. ISP will continue to investigate the homicides and provide updates on those investigations as well as updates on the arrests in Twin Falls. The Boise Police Department will continue to investigate the inmate escape and the Ada County Sheriff’s Office will continue to investigate the officer involved shooting,” said an Idaho State Police press release.

What it left out was that Meade and Umphenour were blockmates for three years at the Idaho Maximum Security Institution in Boise, with Umphenour being released in January, per KTVB. Both are members of the Aryan Knights, an organization dedicated to Making America Great Again.

Usually we would just copy and paste the text, but sometimes it’s better to just see it in this kind of context to properly convey the anguish and madness this terrible scumbag is suffering through.

“Announcement on the Passing of Bryan Malinowski, executive director of Bill and Hillary Clinton National Airport by Bill Walker, chair of the Little Rock Municipal Airport Commission: ‘With a heavy heart, we announce the passing of our executive director Bryan Malinowski. Bryan was a 16-year employee of the airport. Under his leadership, our airport has experienced significant growth and success, expanding services and offerings to our community and state. We extend our heartfelt condolences to Bryan’s wife, Maer, loved ones and friends,’” says a press release from the Bill and Hillary Clinton National Airport in Arkansas, after Malinowski succumbed to his wounds on Thursday.

Their update’s vagueness makes it sound more “Arkancide”-ish than the KARK article that says the ATF were serving a warrant on the guy for arms trafficking when the gunfight started at his home.

But you know, Clintons, mysterious death, corruption something something… Actually pretty surprising the right wing media haven’t jumped on this just given the implications of having those words in the headline and the whole Second Amendment angle too. In a vacuum it’s also very freaking weird that a guy with a good, well-paid job would be moving illegal guns as a side hustle.

They had to have a line somewhere:  The Missouri Republican Party filed a petition in state court to remove Darrell McClanahan III from the primary ballot for governor because a photo surfaced depicting the candidate with a robed and hooded Klan member in front of a burning cross while the pair give a Nazi salute, the Daily Beast reports.

“[Missouri State Republican Committee] does not want to be associated with Mr. McClanahan. His racism and antisemitism are antithetical to beliefs of MRSC,” a petition from the Party says, claiming the Party did not learn of McClanahan’s extremism until after he filed the paperwork, but we were able to find the link above, with the offending photos, with a simple Google search, so they clearly didn’t try too hard on that background search.

Henry Barbour, a GOP Committee member, explained why Republican leadership really, really isn’t worried at all about having a Trump leading the RNC and its fundraising operation, which essentially signed over its checkbook to Donald Trump’s legal team.  “The Trump campaign has confirmed that, indeed, they have no plans to spend any RNC dollars on it, and we appreciate that very much.”  Yeah, because Trump’s financial promises have always panned out.

Filed in the “Nothing Bad Can Happen With This, Right?” drawer:  US Special Forces are stationed on a Taiwanese island just four miles from mainland China, the Telegraph reports.  The troops are on a string of small islands along southeast China, more than 100 miles from Formosa, the main island of Taiwan.

The islands are home to about 125,000 civilians in 6 townships and a couple dozen villages, while Taiwanese forces known as “frogmen” keep outposts on some of the smaller islands.  US Special Forces have stayed on the islands, which can be seen from Chinese shore, for an unspecified period of time, apparently as part of a “exchange” program with the Taiwanese the Pentagon had previously acknowledged.  It’s unlikely the troops traveled there without Pentagon knowledge.

Bless his heart, Junior tries so hard to sound intelligent.  “You know, if it’s 18 million and it’s good for the soundbite at the time, it’s worth 18 million, and if it’s worth hundreds of millions, uh, the next day for a different purpose, it’s worth hundreds of millions,” the son Donald Trump didn’t trust to head his company declares, demonstrating why it was a good choice by admitting that his father makes up his statements as he goes along.  “That’s what’s going on, and if you think it’s gonna stop by going after Donald Trump and seizing his assets for what even some very liberal law perfersers [sic] in New York are saying a victimless crime, the alleged victim is testifying on our behalf, ah, that there was nothing wrong, it doesn’t matter.  They’re willing to seize your assets.  The people screaming about fascism are acting an awful lot like fascists.”

Gillespie County, Texas had around 8,000 ballots cast in the March 5th Republican primary, and they just couldn’t handle it.  Struck with suspicion of electronic voting machines thanks to baseless fears stoked by Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani, and various other conspiracists, county officials decided to hand-count all the ballots in this year’s elections.  As described by the Texas Tribune, it did not go well.

An hour after finally certifying the results of fourteen contested races and thirteen propositions earlier Thursday, Republican Party Chair Bruce Campbell had to call the county election commissioner to come back to recertify the results because he spotted an error in the final results.  And note that this correction happened more than two weeks after the primary was held, not on the night of the election like Trump wanted during the 2020 campaign.

A member of local Tea Party group–yeah, there’s still out there–was exceptionally cheery about the errors he made when he counted ballots, according to a video posted to Mike Lindell’s Frank Social platform–yeah, it’s still out there.

Donald Trump, Jr.’s personal step-Oedipal complex Kimberly Guilfoyle sports an Elvira cosplay look at a congressional fundraiser which, by the attire, was held at an S&M club. Guilfoyle–who was a fundraising co-chair for the 2020 Trump campaign who promised to give lapdances to the top donor at campaign events–apparently wants to help ease the Trump campaign’s cash crunch one dollar at a time.

As he was making unsupported claims of widespread fraud, Donald Trump’s Social Security Administration began assessing fines on around 100 elderly and disabled recipients without advising them of the penalties, racking up more than $10 million in fines, the Washington Post reports.

The investigation, done by the Department of Justice Inspector General because the responsibility for notifying the alleged fraudsters was the duty of the SSA’s Inspector General’s office headed by Trump appointee Gail Ennis, found in 2018, the Agency’s Civil Monetary Penalty Program stopped notifying subjects under investigation for fraud but continued to assess fines and accrue interest on the fines.  A Trump appointee, Ennis had never led an investigative agency, but in a seven-month program in 2019, months after taking office, she authorized $11.5 million in fines for 83 people who had not been contacted.

After suspending the Civil Monetary Penalty Program, the White House asked the Council of the Inspectors General on Integrity and Efficiency, an independent federal agency overseeing the network of federal Inspectors General, to review the conduct of Ennis’s office.  Ennis has implored the CIG to drop the probe writing, “We believe DOJ OIG has no authority to make unprecedented, programmatic recommendations to [the Social Security Administration],” a lawyer for the agency wrote. “It is disappointing that our concerns, which have government-wide implications, are not being taken seriously.”

A Republican in the Florida legislature notarized a letter purportedly from a professor with Ivy League credentials at the Christian university her family owns to support the school’s effort to get accreditated, but the professor says he never worked at the institution and the signature is a bad forgery, the Orlando Sentinel reports.

When Central Christian University applied for state certification in 2021, it included a list of faculty that included alumni from Ivy League universities, but five of the people on the list say they have no affiliation with the school. The names continued to appear in the school’s 2023-24 catalog as current members of the faculty.

On a form notarized by now-state legislator Carolina Amesty, the school submitted documentation allegedly signed by Robert Shaffer, a Ph.D. from the University of Florida, attesting to his employment in August 2021.  Shaffer, however, told the Sentinel that if needed, he would swear in a court that he did not sign any document from the University or from Amesty, and that the signature was not his.  Three handwriting analysts contacted by the paper concluded the handwriting wasn’t Shaffer’s but matched Amesty’s style.  Amesty was elected to the legislature in 2022.

This is kind of too complicated to recompose so we’ll just copy verbatim what the New York Times reports about the implications of the fine print to a memo disgraced former President Trump’s campaign sent out to donors: “the first $6,600 donated will go to Mr Trump’s campaign. The next $5,000 will go to his Save America PAC, which paid more than $50 million in legal and investigation-related bills for Mr Trump in 2023. The $5,000 amount is the maximum that federal rules say can be contributed to Save America by an individual. After that, the RNC gets the next $413,000, followed by dozens of state parties. In practice, what that means is that even modestly large contributors – anything above $6,600 – will fund the account that Mr Trump has used to defray legal costs.”

The bottom line is if you donate $11,601 then the Republican National Committee gets $1. If you donate the max then they obviously get significantly more, but they’re third in line after the PAC that’s the been paying Trump’s criminal defense bills. Open up those checkbooks, cocksuckers!

Five-times indicted Dem New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez is taking his rumored George Santos-like plan to raise money for his legal defense official as he announced Thursday he’s skipping the primary and running for reelection as an “independent Democrat,” per NBC’s Sahil Kapur.

“I am hopeful that my exoneration will take place this summer and allow me to pursue my candidacy as an independent Democrat in the general election [if I’m not in prison],” Gold Bars Bob said.

“Unlike the Democrats, who are KILLING SOCIAL SECURITY AND MEDICARE by allowing the INVASION OF THE MIGRANTS, I will NOT, under any circumstance, allow either of these two precious GEMS to be even touched under a Trump Administration. Biden is killing them both with the INVASION, while at the same time destroying our Country!” writes fat former President Trump on Truth Social, plainly trying to walk back the dumb shit he said on CNBC last week. The Republican Study Committee’s dumbass proposal to raise the retirement age couldn’t have helped either.

The Never Trump Republican Study Group led by Rep. Kevin Hern decides now would be a great moment to raise the Social Security retirement age, 7 months before the critical November 5th election. They're trying to defeat Trump— and President Trump must promise he and the GOP…

— Lou Dobbs (@LouDobbs) March 21, 2024

Here’s Lou Dobbs shitting his pants over it this morning, would bet that he got Donald on the phone at some point after that. Also might’ve been the Biden Administration jumping on it too with a statement that read “This extreme budget will cut Medicare, Social Security, and the Affordable Care Act. It endorses a national abortion ban. The Republican budget will raise housing costs and prescription drugs costs for families. And it will shower giveaways on the wealthy and biggest corporations. Let me be clear: I will stop them.” Just too bad Trump didn’t abuse Hern directly.

After that the fat bastard posted “JUST OUT THAT CROOKED JOE BIDEN, THE WORST AND MOST CORRUPT PRESIDENT IN THE HISTORY OF THE USA, IS LEADING (AND LEAKING!) THE WEAPONIZATION OF GOVERNMENT AGAINST HIS POLITICAL OPPONENT, ME!” which, in the likely event he was talking about the transcript of a January 6th Committee interview with his valet, it was actually a MAGA Republican Congressman, Barry Loudermilk, who published that transcript.

Spandex-wearing grapple-freak Jim Jordan’s already shitty week just got a little bit worse as the lawsuit he filed Thursday against the Justice Department to compel testimony by two tax attorneys he subpoenaed last year knowledge about Hunter Biden something something has been assigned to DC Circuit Judge Ana Reyes, a Biden appointee, Politico’s Josh Gerstein reports.