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Fat Hitler issues deranged ultimatum

“That is why I am hereby calling on Governor Walz, Mayor Frey, and EVERY Democrat Governor and Mayor in the United States of America to formally cooperate with the Trump Administration to enforce our Nation’s Laws, rather than resist and stoke the flames of Division, Chaos and Violence…”

“Meanwhile, Democrat run Sanctuary Cities and States are REFUSING to cooperate with ICE, and they are actually encouraging Leftwing Agitators to unlawfully obstruct their operations to arrest the Worst of the Worst People! By doing this, Democrats are putting Illegal Alien Criminals over Taxpaying, Law-Abiding Citizens, and they have created dangerous circumstances for EVERYONE involved. Tragically, two American Citizens have lost their lives as a result of this Democrat ensued chaos,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Sunday and there was a lot of bullshit in between those ellipses… And it looks like he posted a two-part message backwards.

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Surprise! ICE released target of deadly Saturday op in 2018

DHS officials on Saturday told the New York Post that Jose Huerta-Chuma, the undocumented Ecuadorian target of the ICE/Border Patrol op that ended in the shooting death of Minneapolis man Alex Pretti, was being sought because he previously had been charged with domestic assault, disorderly conduct, and driving without a license, thus making him the “worst of the worst” as the state propaganda campaign to improve the public image of these operations goes.

Sur-fucking-prise from the Minnesota Department of Corrections, who began their statement by extending their “condolences to the family and loved ones of Alex Pretti, who was shot and killed by federal agents this morning in Minneapolis. The loss of life is tragic, and Minnesotans deserve transparency, accountability, and facts. In the hours following the shooting, US Border Patrol Chief Gregory Bovino held a press conference asserting that the operation was targeting an individual named Jose Huerta-Chuma and characterized him as having a significant criminal history.”

“Because federal statements have repeatedly included inaccurate information about Minnesota custody and criminal records, the DOC reviewed available records to determine whether the individual referenced had any connection to Minnesota state prison custody. Based on DOC records and publicly available Minnesota court data: The individual identified by federal officials has never been in Minnesota DOC custody. DOC and court records show no felony commitments associated with this. Public Minnesota court records reflect only misdemeanor-level traffic offenses from more than a decade ago. The individual is not currently under DOC supervision,” the statement continued.

The the kicker: “DOC records further indicate that an individual by this name was previously held in federal immigration custody in a local Minnesota jail in 2018, during President Trump’s first administration. Any decisions regarding release from federal custody at that time would have been made by federal authorities. DOC has no information explaining why this individual was released.”

Emphasis added on the gutter-level fucking lethal incompetence from this regime.

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Little Nazi guy cautions against jumping to conclusions about killing of leftist terrorist intent on massacring CBP agents: Live updates

Diminutive MAGA SS Commander Greg Bovino on Sunday cautioned against jumping to conclusions in the fatal Saturday shooting of Minneapolis man Alex Pretti, a man who Bovino and his fellow top Fifth Reich enforcers have concluded was a violent terrorist who showed up at the scene Saturday intent on murdering CBP agents detailed to ICE operations in the city before he was put down.

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“Fuck you, Ted”

In a series of recordings taken surreptitiously during several private meetings with donors last year and provided to Axios by one of those donors to further some agenda, Canadian immigrant Senator Ted Cruz recounted how he and his fellow Republicans in the chamber held a lengthy late night April 2025 post-“Liberation Day” conference call in which they begged and pleaded with convicted felon President Trump to back down from the suicidally stupid tariffs which, per Cruz, “did not go well.”

“Trump was in a bad mood. I’ve been in conversations where he was very happy. This was not one of them,” Cruz said, then relaying what he told Trump: “Mr President, if we get to November 2026 and people’s 401(k)s are down 30 percent and prices are up 10–20 percent at the supermarket, we’re going to go into Election Day, face a bloodbath You’re going to lose the House, you’re going to lose the Senate, you’re going to spend the next two years being impeached every single week.”

“Fuck you, Ted,” Trump then responded, according to Cruz. The Axios article is actually mostly about Cruz privately shit-talking Trump and neckbearded Vice President JD Vance, and the tariff anecdote leads into how the audio caught Cruz telling a donor that he told his staff “if anyone uses [Trump’s stupid ‘Liberation Day’], they will be terminated on the spot. That is not language we use,” lol.

“Tucker created JD. JD is Tucker’s protege, and they are one and the same,” Cruz said in another moment, which Axios says is significant because, while Ted’s hatred of Tucker Carlson is no secret, he had previously refrained from publicly linking Tucker and Jaydee. Cruz blamed the two for Mike Waltz’s exile to the UN, because Waltz had “supported being vigorous against Iran and bombing Iran, and Tucker and JD took Mike out,” failing of course to mention the “Signalgate” shitshow but also hinting at Cruz by extension accusing Jaydee of being anti-Israel and thus antisemitic.

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Alex Pretti was disarmed before he was executed

Alex Pretti, the 37 year-old Veterans Affairs ICU nurse murdered in Minneapolis this morning was shot at least 10 times by a Border Patrol agent about a second after another had pulled the gun that Pretti was legally carrying from his waistband, according to a video analysis by CNN.

So yeah, Pretti was murdered. They beat the shit out of him, took his gun that he never tried to use, and then executed him while he was still on his hands and knees. It was murder by a fascist regime led by an illegitimate autocrat who more likely than not raped underage sex trafficking victims.

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President addresses nation riven by unrest

“It is actually possible that the total amount of money stolen, over the years, by Corrupt Politicians and Fraudsters, from Minnesota, will exceed $100 Billion Dollars. In any event, whether it is or isn’t, the Theft, Incompetence, and Fraud is MASSIVE! Sadly, whatever numbers we find, California, and other Democrat run States, WILL BE WORSE. Stay tuned!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Saturday, doing his absolute best to heal a nation riven by unrest after a deadly shooting.

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Make America Great Again

Let’s all work together to support our President as he works to restore Law and Order, Peace and Prosperity, and safety to our streets as he sends his brave and dedicated law enforcement officers into Minneapolis to quell a culture of fraud and disrespect for authority. Nobody should question what’s going on here when a man is getting subdued on icy pavement in broad daylight and screaming “You’re gonna have to kill me! You’re gonna have to kill me! I’ve done nothing wrong! My name is Matthew James! I’m a US citizen! You’re gonna kill me! Is that what you want?” while his wife sobs and agents of the state fire chemical grenades at civilians hours after a man was shot dead.

If these people would just understand that ICE and CBP are there to help them and protect them from the millions of illegal criminals that Joe Biden unleashed into this country. Really when you think of it this is Biden and Kamala Harris’s fault for letting things get this bad and not sending militarized federal law enforcement into Minneapolis to fire chemical grenades at civilians in the street.

Remember that Laken Riley would be alive today if Biden had the guts to arrest toddlers and manhandle old men and shoot civilians in the streets. People should blame him, not Trump, who is Making America Great Again by ending the war between Thailand and Cambodia plus seven others.

National Zero will resume our regular news coverage after this important editorial message on the importance of supporting President Trump’s plan to renovate the Kennedy Center.

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Double decker TACO served up

In a brief interview with the New York Post printed Saturday (or a longer one that the assclowns use to run seven different articles) convicted felon President Trump told the lame, Murdoch-owned tabloid that he’s skipping this year’s Super Bowl while pretending it isn’t because of anti-MAGA halftime acts Bad Bunny and Green Day. “I’m anti-them. I think it’s a terrible choice. All it does is sow hatred. Terrible,” said the fat bastard who then claimed that wasn’t the reason he won’t be attending the “Big Game” at the San Francisco 49ers’ home field in Santa Clara, California early next month.

“It’s just too far away. I would. I’ve [gotten] great hands [at] the Super Bowl,” and just gotta stop there because the sentence without the words the Post put in brackets is “I’ve great hands the Super Bowl,” and Jesus Christ. “They like me, I would go if, you know, it was a little bit shorter.”

Also on Saturday one of the elderly invalids aides wrote “The GREAT and very BRAVE soldiers of the United Kingdom will always be with the United States of America! In Afghanistan, 457 died, many were badly injured, and they were among the greatest of all warriors. It’s a bond too strong to ever be broken. The UK Military, with tremendous Heart and Soul, is second to none (except for the USA!). We love you all, and always will! President DONALD J TRUMP” and posted it to his Truth Social account under his name to TACO out of his disrespect for UK service members.

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Fox News already reporting executed man was armed

Literally the only piece of new information in a Saturday morning Fox News article headlined “Border Patrol-involved shooting reported in Minneapolis” is that DHS “told Fox News that the suspect was armed with a gun and two magazines” along with a pic of the supposed weapon.

Since they provided Fox News with that information and nothing else, simple deduction should tell you the following: (A) The man was a US citizen and not a target for immigration enforcement operations. They would have immediately tried to justify it by saying he’s an illegal. (B) He made no attempt to actually pull it out or fire it because that pretext for blasting him would also have been added to the Fox News article. (C) Neither of those facts are going to matter because the pic of the gun sitting on a car seat is the new “Jonathan Ross suffered internal bleeding.”

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ICE agents execute another civilian in Minneapolis

This happened just this morning near the corner of Nicolett and 24th in the south side of the city, the video being cautioned as unconfirmed by a number of Twitter users. However the city’s Metro Transit issued a “Rider Alert” at 9:20 AM local time saying specifically that bus “Route 18 detoured off Nicollet Ave from 24th St to 28th St until later today,” without saying why. Can’t really blame them for not wanting to say “Your bus has been rerouted because some sick fuck ICE agent repeatedly shot a guy who was lying face down on the snow this morning” in a message to riders.

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Angry grandpa threatens Canada with 100 percent tariff

“If Governor Carney thinks he is going to make Canada a ‘Drop Off Port’ for China to send goods and products into the United States, he is sorely mistaken. China will eat Canada alive, completely devour it, including the destruction of their businesses, social fabric, and general way of life.”

“If Canada makes a deal with China, it will immediately be hit with a 100 percent Tariff against all Canadian goods and products coming into the USA,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Saturday because he has nothing better to do than increase Americans’ cost of living.

The fat bastard then posted “I have approved Emergency Declarations for the Historic Winter Storms headed to the Great State of South Carolina and the Commonwealth of Virginia. With the help of FEMA and our State partners, we will keep everyone safe, and make sure both States have the support they need. We will continue to monitor, and stay in touch with all States in the path of this storm. Stay Safe, and Stay Warm!” indicating he forgot Virginia no longer has a Republican governor.

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Xi purges top ChiCom general

Chinese dictator Xi Jingping’s goons have put Central Military Commission Vice Chair Zhang Youxia under investigation for some kind of misconduct that was either made up or real but ignored until now, a move that the AP reports is the latest in a series of purges of the People’s Liberation Army’s top leadership who’ve been suspected of disloyalty to Xinnie the Pooh, chair of the commission.

Another member of the commission, Liu Zhenli, was also placed under investigation for who the hell knows what pretext. General Zhang would be the equivalent of Pete Hegseth in rank but the commission itself is ostensibly a power structure separate from Xi’s direct command, so Xi putting him and Liu under investigation is more like the bullshit attempts to prosecute Fed Chairman Jerome Powell and Board of Governors member Lisa Cook – except more effective and without checks.

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“There have not been discussions about toning down the rhetoric”

White House sources tell CNN that convicted felon President Trump and his minions are concerned about the “optics” of the brutality ICE has been inflicting on innocent people in Minneapolis but not enough to actually order the fascist stormtrooper korps to stand down so much as trying to spin up some bullshit narrative that they’re doing more good than harm. The best idea Trump had for this was to show reporters a bunch of mugshots of the relative handful of actual dangerous criminals ICE has supposedly rounded up – and none of the otherwise innocent regular people rounded up.

“He wanted to do that briefing in large part because he himself wanted to bring out the mugshots that we had printed for him. He wanted to remind the world of why ICE is doing what they’re doing,” a minion said. Another told the network that “There’s an effort underway to come up with new ideas and new ways to amplify the good work they are doing. There have not been discussions about toning down the rhetoric. In fact there have been discussions on how to remind people more aggressively of why this happened in the first place.” Recall that Trump sent ICE to Minnesota because that little wiener Nick Shirley tried to enter a daycare center that he claimed was a front for a massive international fraud operation, none of which has any real nexus to illegal immigration.

CNN writes that “some administration officials believe there is too much focus on the tensions between ICE agents – and therefore the administration – and protesters, and have discussed how to extricate themselves from that narrative,” as if the “lib-owning” isn’t fun now that the outrages they deliberately provoked are proving to be wildly unpopular with all but the most hardcore.

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New theory proposed for Europa’s theoretical ecosystem

“A recent study by geophysicists at Washington State University offers insight into how nutrients may reach the subsurface ocean of Europa, one of Jupiter’s moons and a leading candidate for extraterrestrial life in the solar system. Scientists have long wondered how life-sustaining nutrients could make it from the surface into Europa’s ice-covered ocean, where microscopic life is believed to exist. Drawing from a process from Earth’s geology known as crustal delamination, the research team used computer modeling to show that dense, nutrient-rich ice can separate from the surrounding ice and descend into the ocean,” says a press release from Washington State.

Complicated story short, the shit that could sustain life under the very thick ice shell around Europa seeps into the volcanically-warmed liquid ocean underneath and feeds the “microscopic” organisms that may or may not exist. The “microscopic” part seems to be kind of gratuitous scientific conservatism, like what the hell makes them so sure that an ocean that’s existed for 4 billion years doesn’t contain an ecosystem just as complex as Earth’s oceanosphere or even more so.

Nobody’s ever really going to know what’s down there until astronauts with a lot of heavy-duty equipment land on the snowball and start drilling to send a probe down. And then that fucker better be sterilized to hell to ensure a virgin ocean isn’t destroyed by something stupid like botulism.

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REMINDER: Buy as much milk, eggs, bread, and gas as you can

If you’re one of the as many as 200 million Americans facing a major winter weather advisory this weekend then it’s absolutely imperative that you immediately drop everything and drive to your nearest grocery store to buy at minimum three gallons of milk, five loaves of bread, three dozen eggs, fill up your tank with gasoline and then also fill up a red five gallon gas can.

Don’t ask questions, just do it. Even if you’re already good and especially if you live in a suburban community with a lot of older people who panic buy milk, eggs, bread, and gas as they can every time there’s some major weather event in the forecast. It’s a time-honored tradition to go to the supermarket and complain a lot about how “crazy” it is, oh my God this place is a zoo. You also absolutely have to say something “Why does everyone act like this when there’s a blizzard coming? I just came here to get some milk, eggs, and bread so I don’t have to go out when it’s all snowy. Oh for Pete’s sake they’re out of 2 percent low fat. That’s just great, all these f-wording people have to freak out and come here. I bet the Mobil is a madhouse now too! Every time it snows!”

This is a matter of life and death. You must have milk, eggs, bread, and gas to survive.

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Regime enforcer takes defeat in “case” against Don Lemon poorly

There’s always some fucking excuse, like that, according to Trump DOJ Assistant Attorney General Harmett Dhillon, the magistrate judge that refused to sign off on the charge against Don Lemon is married to some staffer for Minnesota AG Keith Ellison. Of course it wouldn’t be an ill-advised podcast interview with psychopath Megan Kelly if there wasn’t some plot hole, as Politico’s Josh Gerstein points out that Lemon was only one out of five other participants in the church “attack” that the regime failed to secure an arrest for. Dhillon says she’s going to try with a grand jury.

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Texas oil industry sweating Venezuela glut

Oil town Odessa, Texas’s director of economic development Tom Manskey tells the Texas Tribune that his town and the Permian Basin region at large could take a beating if convicted felon President Trump’s seizure of Venezuela’s oil wealth ends up being a real thing and the market is flooded.

“I would imagine it would have a negative effect on our region with regards to jobs and everything else. We’re in a very unpredictable economic time, and I think that’s just adding to it. There’s no predictability right now in the marketplace,” said Manskey in response to Trump’s pledge to bring prices down to $50 a barrel when the industry needs a minimum of $62 to break even.

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Potomac polluted with swampy sewage – plus a sewer pipe broke!

The Potomac River is filled with swampy raw sewage from the muck of DC… In other news the Daily Voice reports that a major sewer line just outside the District’s northwestern border ruptured and started spewing millions upon millions of gallons of waste into the waterway! Bwahahahahaha!

Crews are working hard to contain the leak and have been making progress – which is the opposite of Congress – but want the job finished before this weekend’s winter storm hits. It’ll be so cold you’ll see politicians with their hands in their own pockets! Seriously folks, let’s hear it for the DC Water utility’s workers! If they pull this job off there’s another godawful hole that constantly spews a massive torrent of foul-smelling waste they can plug next: It’s located at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue!

Just don’t walk too far fellas! If you make a wrong turn you might end up at the Supreme Court and get mistaken for the guys that Ginni called to fix the waste tank on the luxury RV parked out front!

Worse, you’ll get cowed into the job anyway. Then when you find the clog you’ll tell her she and her husband should use regular toilet paper instead of the US Constitution! Hahahahahaahaha!

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Amphibians do eat algae, so maybe Trump’s onto something here

5 hours ago

Cocaine Mitch’s staff insists he’s still alive

5 hours ago

Axios reports Maine Dems have a growing mess on their hands

7 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Scared grownups surround tantrum-prone toddler

7 hours ago

Federal judge nukes Regime subpoenas to Walk, Frey, Ellison

10 hours ago

Detroit transit safety officer fired for complaining about bus driver effing supervisor on job, other top official drunkenly chasing pigeon

12 hours ago

Comer still dumber than the sow he lost his virginity to in 1989

13 hours ago

Dem leads Iowa Senate race 47 to 45 percent: poll

15 hours ago

Alan Greenspan’s lifespan is over

16 hours ago

Fox News reports they got her now

16 hours ago

Keir Starmer officially announces resignation

18 hours ago

Heard and McDonald Island’s baby seals clubbed hard by bird flu

1 day ago

President to sue treasonous criminals

1 day ago

Mountain Dew marketing team still has their edge

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Baby duckling found dead in National Mall reflecting pool

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Iranians walk out of negotiations after Trump threats

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Fox News reads bellicose comment by deranged, elderly viewer

2 days ago

Fat toddler all but admits he’s ordering “Reflecting Poll” arrests

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Texas woman killed when self-driving Tesla plows into home

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Regime arresting people for taking National Mall pool paint chips

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Orange mental patient doubles down on Italy lie

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Newsmax guy pretty butthurt over inconsequential Trump failure

3 days ago

Scientology seizes control of public street

3 days ago

Hegseth minion tells Congress $80 billion needed to cover Iran war

4 days ago

Orange Scumbag slurs his way through some event: Live video

4 days ago

Trump threatens Americans with a good time

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Jaydee subs in for Karoline on lying duty, again

4 days ago

Hunter Biden wins big at Supreme Court

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Mad Fuhrer issues signature all-caps bunker rant

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BREAKING: UFC terror attack plotter a Mexican DACA recipient!!!

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Tropical Storm Arthur to dump up to 20 inches of rain on Texas

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“Pastors for Trump” founder forsaken by his true God

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor snaps at reporters in France

6 days ago

Jon “Os(jerk!)off” pretty clever for Trump

6 days ago

“Incensed by the dissent”

6 days ago

You can kind of tell why they wanted to hang Mike Pence

6 days ago

Rick Jackson defeats Trump-endorsed scumbag in Georgia gov primary, Trump-endorsed scumbag Collins takes Senate primary

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Trump needs Modi to help him climb single step

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Regime to allow Iranians to start selling oil immediately

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Jaydee x The View kind of sucked for Jaydee

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McDonald’s celebrates America250 by reviving fried apple pies

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Taxpayers covering at least $300 million of Trump ballroom costs

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“Most of that is basically Iranian propaganda”

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Muslim Republican leaves Texas GOP convention in tears

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“Dumocrats” propagating Trump capitulation

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Fanboy says it’s okay to give Iran money because they took a beating

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Newsom says he’s under federal grand jury investigation

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Strategic Petroleum Reserve at lowest level since 1983

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WATCH LIVE: National embarrassment in Europe for a day or two

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Top Israeli official gives a big fuck no to Trump “peace deal”

1 week ago

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