Wearing an unfortunate form-fitting dress and her finest face paint to look good on stage to satisfy her vanity, Republican Georgia Congresscritter and tridactyl Marjorie Taylor Greene preaches to the crowd at a Talking Point USA conference for young women–also known as a Charlie Kirk hook-up event–talks about how the very-attractive Satan–who took such sinful pride in his appearance–wanted to be God, much as her idol Donald Trump pretends he is.  Marge gives an inaccurate version of the biblical tale of Adam and Eve, completely omitting how God created, and then banished, Lilith, Adam’s first wife.

Note that the harlot–Marge is getting a divorce, rumored because she was having an affair in violation of a Commandment from God– is standing before a backdrop curiously decorated with a muted rainbow design, an apparent sign that Kirk is surrendering to the Woke.

The Russian Ministry of Defense released compelling cockpit footage on Telegraph of a KA-52 Alligator attack helicopter hovering over a field as a number of large vehicles cross a field in Ukraine, saying it shows “the destruction of foreign armored vehicles, including Leopard tanks” with the pilot celebrating:  “Direct hit!”

The problem, according to the Associated Press, was that the vehicles weren’t the German-built main battle tank sent to Ukrainian defense forces.  They weren’t even armored vehicles.  Analysis shows the vehicles were two farm combines and a self-propelled fertilizer/pesticide sprayer, likely parked in the field by a farmer hoping pilots would not mistake the agriculture equipment for weapons like, say, a tank.

But like Trump supporters who refuse to believe expert analysis, Russia has maintained it destroyed Leopard 2 tanks, despite the images clearly showing the vehicles sitting elevated on four wheels, versus the tracked tanks that sit close to the ground.

A new CBS News/YouGov poll finds only 38 percent of self-identified Republican primary voters agreed that disgraced former President Trump’s theft of classified documents from the White House and reckless handling of them at Mar-a-Lago was a national security risk while 80 percent of respondents overall believed that yeah, he probably endangered some important shit.

Asked about their top concern from the indictment, 76 percent said that it was “politically motivated,” while 12 percent said the “documents were a national security risk,” and the remaining 12 percent said “both” which we strangely sort of respect of an admission that Trump made himself vulnerable to a legitimate prosecution when his enemies would capitalize on one.

The major East Coast highway running from Florida to the Canadian border, Interstate 95 will be shut down in Philadelphia for an extended period–at least weeks, but likely months–after a morning truck fire caused a section of highway to collapse in what conservatives will label another failure of Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg, the Philadelphia Inquirer reports.

Seven miles of the Interstate remain and roadways under the collapsed section remain closed in both directions, and some traffic was rerouted through Philadelphia neighborhood streets.  Officials have not determined the cause of the truck fire, nor have they released the condition of the driver.

Fascist lawyer John Eastman, who played a pivotal role in convincing fat former President Trump he could order Mike Pence to refuse to certify the 2020 election will this week face a California Bar ethics trial over misconduct charges for the attempted treason, Politico reports.

That there’s more than a good chance Eastman will be disbarred (while also being apparently under federal criminal investigation) is not even the best part, as among the witnesses he’s enlisted to testify on his behalf are two particularly fucking stupid 2020 election conspiracy theorists “Cyber Ninjas” dickhead Doug Logan – who admitted he didn’t know shit about election law after launching his failed “audit” of Maricopa County, Arizona’s vote in from 2020 – and Russ Ramsland.

Ramsland is a legend among MAGA assclowns as he managed to submit an affidavit in multiple court cases in the aftermath of Trump’s defeat in which his “proof” of irregularities in Michigan was a database written by either himself or someone else who didn’t know that “MN” stands for Minnesota and “MI” stands for Michigan… which led Ramsland to list towns in Minnesota in an affidavit that was supposed to be about Michigan that filed to a federal court. “This is a catastrophic error, the kind of thing that causes a legal position to crash and burn,” wrote Powerline Blog editor John Hinderaker when he was first reporting on the fuckup. So yeah, Ramsland and Doug Logan are supposed to help save John Eastman’s California law license.

Cops in Scotland on Sunday arrested former First Minister Nicola Sturgeon as part of a probe into the finances and funding of her pro-independence Scottish National Party, the BBC reports.

“Nicola Sturgeon has today, Sunday 11 June, by arrangement with Police Scotland, attended an interview where she was to be arrested and questioned in relation to Operation Branchform. Nicola has consistently said she would cooperate with the investigation if asked and continues to do so,” said an SNP spokesman. William Wallace is probably spinning in all four of his graves.

Spandex-wearing grapple freak Congressman Jim Jordan did not have a good morning on CNN, still stuck claiming that his Orange Allah had declassified the documents he stole before leaving office when Donald himself is on tape admitting that he had never declassified at least one of them.

Kim Yo-jong, the youngest sister of North Korea dictator Kim Jong-un, is assuming more power as her brother descends into ahaze of fatty food and booze, intel reports from US and foreign agencies show according to the Daily Beast.

Yo-jong has become the voice of the communist state, making public appearances and issuing statements on behalf of the regime while her brother enjoys imported cheeses, foreign cigarettes and expensive liquors.  Jong-un has maintained his titles, including Communist Party head and Supreme Leader, but Yo-jong has become the “bad cop” in a “bad cop/drunk cop” tag team, pushing Party operatives to institute tougher policies on a population already starving to enrich the leaders.

Reportedly, Jong-un has packed more than 310 pounds onto his five-foot-seven-inch frame, fifty pounds more than two years ago.  North Korean officials are also reportedly researching Western medicines that treat insomnia, with South Korean intel claiming Jong-un suffers from sleep disorders and sleep depravation, particularly after the failure of a satellite launch in early May.

A Japanese sushi chain sued a high school student who posted videos online showing himself licking soy sauce bottles, plates and bowls put out for customer use, as well as touching plates of sushi passing on a restaurant conveyor belt, CNN reports.

Sushiro, which operates restaurants in China and Taiwan as well as Japan, says it lost more than ¥16 billion (about $115 million) in revenue since the videos taken in the city of Gifu started spreading on social media.  In a nation where cleanliness and honor are imbued in the culture, the restaurant called the stunt an act of “sushi terrorism” designed to dissuade customers from patronizing the place.

Former UK prime minister and Trump hairstyle acolyte Boris Johnson unexpectedly resigned his seat in Parliament, throwing an unexpected curve to the Conservative Party government of current Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, ABC News reports.

With two other Tory MPs with him, Johnson resigned after being accused of lying to Parliament about holding lavish parties at 10 Downing Street, the British version of the White House, while ordering other Brits to stay in lock-down during the pandemic, claiming that the soirees didn’t violate any rules in place at the time.  An investigative panel of the very Britishly-named Committee of Privileges gave Johnson an as-yet unreleased report that apparently prompted Johnson’s resignation, a report Johnson has characterized as the product of a “witch hunt” and a “kangaroo court” with the sole purpose to “drive me out of Parliament.”

Speaking aboard Trump Farce One after his lengthy diatribe against the government he wants to head, indicted former president Donald Trump said he would “never leave” the presidential race even if he’s convicted of the various crimes he’s already accused of and any future charges, Politico reports.

Perhaps acknowledging that his best path to freedom is getting reelected and granting himself a Constitutionally-questionable pardon, Trump said, “I’ll never leave.  Look, if I would have left, I would have left prior to the original race in 2016. That was a rough one. In theory that was not doable,” adding about Special Counsel Jack Smith, “These are thugs and degenerates who are after me.”

“Nobody wants to be indicted,” said Trump. “I don’t care that my poll numbers went up by a lot. I don’t want to be indicted. I’ve never been indicted. I went through my whole life, now I get indicted every two months. It’s been political.”  Although Trump had never personally been indicted for a crime prior to 2023, he and his company had been the subject of numerous investigations and inquiries which have ended with his business or his lackeys fined or in jail.

https://youtu.be/Tlh0yXpKheg

Fat former President Trump will speak publicly Saturday for the first time since being indicted on 37 federal felony counts for stealing classified documents from the White House. Should be fun!

Ted Kaczynski, the anti-technology domestic terrorist known as the Unabomber who conducted a series of mailbombing from 1978 until his capture in 1996, was found dead in a federal prison Saturday morning in North Carolina, the Associated Press reports.  He was 81.  The cause of death was not immediately known.

A Harvard alum with a Ph.D. from Michigan, Kaczynski was serving a life sentence without the possibility of parole for at least sixteen bombings that killed three people and injured more than 20.  Working from a cabin in the woods of Montana, Kaczynski sent a 35,000-word manifesto, titled “Industrial Society and Its Future” to the Washington Post in 1995, which the newspaper published as a special supplement after consulting with the Department of Justice and then-Attorney General Janet Reno.  Investigators believed distributing the manifesto would help identify the bomber, and it worked:  Kaczynski’s brother recognized key phrases and themes in the work and contacted authorities.

At a Kyiv press conference with dream Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Saturday, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy said his forces have launched counteroffensive and defensive moves, with military leaders confirming major fighting at various regions, Politico reports.

“I am in touch with our commanders of different directions every day,” Zelenskyy said “[Ukrainian military commanders’ attitude] is positive. Pass this on to Putin.”  Ukraine’s General Staff said military forces have had 34 clashes with Russian troops in the eastern regions of Ukraine over the previous 24 hours.

A Republican candidate for a town council on Long Island has been exposed as a serial exposer after the driver of a van for developmentally disabled adults caught him on camera standing naked in the doorway of his home as she picked up a passenger on the same street, the New York Post reports.

Behavioral therapist and van driver Victoria Lombardi, 30, tells the Post the May 25th incident she caught on video was “at least” the tenth time Republican Babylon town council candidate Kevin Sabella, 63, had exposed himself to her as she drove by. The Post describes Sabella as a “well-respected financial advisor, Knights of Columbus trustee, and a church council member at his local Catholic parish,” as well as connected to local Republican Congressmen Nick LaLota and Andrew Garbarino (no mention of other Long Island Congressman George Santos, though).

“I had noticed one morning that [Sabella] was naked. I thought maybe it was a mistake, or maybe he had dementia and didn’t realize what he was doing, but then it happened again, and we made eye contact and after the third time I said this is definitely on purpose,” Lombardi told The Post of the exposure incidents which she said began about two months ago. “So I just started to take note of it. I started to notice him waiting by the window and watching me come down the block.”

Suffolk County Police say they’re investigating the weenie wagger. “I had somebody take a closer look and see what we can do about it,” Suffolk PD Commissioner Rodney Harrison told the Post.

The fat bastard has posted quite a lot of crazy shit over the last two days but this one stands out for its “hopeful” message. Hopeful-ish. Hitler supposedly often said stuff like this to his minions in the bunker in April 1945 after his doctors shot him up with methamphetamines.

A township supervisor in Gennessee County, Michigan revealed this week that cops found nearly 300 ballots from the 2020 election in a storage unit accidentally stashed there in a box by an employee who was supposedly unaware of the box’s contents, John Solomon’s lame site reports.

Thetford Township Supervisor Rachel Stanke informed the town board at a presentation Wednesday where she detailed the end of a laborious Freedom of Information Act request process on what police found when they inspected the storage unit back in August 2022. Stanke said she wanted this all out to ensure integrity of future elections and to ensure they’re “run fairly and smoothly.”

Which is fine enough. Somebody fucked up and the best way to handle it is to be as honest and upfront as possible about it as soon as the facts are known. That’s not what John Solomon is doing by reporting this though. He goes out of his way to find these localized mistakes (and non-mistakes) to paint a picture of an election system in crisis nationwide. Joe Biden won Gennessee County by 9 percent, or 20,676 votes in 2020, more than his margin in the entire states of Arizona, Georgia, and Wisconsin. Assuming the circa 300 votes weren’t counted – they may have been – the find is not going to make a fucking difference. There’s as much a point for Solomon to report this as there is for Fox News to pick up a video of some homeless asshole shoplifting from a CVS in San Francisco. It’s simply outrage porn for the fanboys who are never gratified from it. They just want more.

• I mean, I like to read when I’m on the can as much as the next guy, but I don’t keep file boxes in the bathroom.
• Joe Biden didn’t criminalize Donald Trump’s actions.  Various Congresses and presidents over the past ~240 years did when they enacted the laws Trump broke.  Those laws were on the books long before Biden went to Washington in the 1970s, and they were all designed to stop people like Trump.  The citizens of Florida, not Joe Biden, determined there was enough evidence to indict Trump.  Trump’s upset that the law is being applied to him, because as with most Republicans in office, he thinks he’s above it.
• Anybody seen Melania lately?  Is she hungover or still drinking?
• The PGA will undoubtedly make some rules changes due to its merger with LIV, like instead of a one-stroke penalty for illegally moving a ball, you’ll lose your right hand.
  Read More ▶ “Random thoughts Friday, Volume CXXIV”