Categories
Uncategorized

The One With Trump Ranting on Hannity, Not Making Sense

As a service to our NatZero readers, we listened to Trump’s rant on Hannity so you don’t have to.  In this rant, which was done without a break–and please note were not transcribing Trump’s most inane passages–Trump says he really, really wanted to get out of Afghanistan, and that he would’ve done a great withdrawal–like no one has ever seen before!–and the withdrawal would have been one for historians.  And he would have withdrawn all the troops… but yet somehow kept Bagram Air Base under US control even though there would be no troops there.  So… enjoy (?).

“We went into the Middle East [Trump is referring to Afghanistan as “the Middle East.”  It’s not.]  and we shouldn’t have been there and we blew it to pieces and now we’re leaving and because of what they’re doing we’re leaving in disgrace.  We could’ve left with great dignity.  We could’ve left with safety,” Trump says, apparently unaware that he occupied the Oval Office at one time, where he could’ve overseen a withdrawal with “dignity” and “safety.”

“We could’ve taken everybody with us that we wanted, all of the great American citizens and people that helped us, whether it’s interpreters or others.  But we could’ve taken ’em out very easily and we wouldn’t have had a rush because the Taliban was not going anywhere,” Trump claims, although his administration limited the number of Significant Interest Visas (SIVs) to an average of just 50 per month in the last ten months of his administration.

“We had them totally under control,” Trump claims.  “Everytime we saw movement, we hit ’em with an F-18, and the movement stopped.  But we had very little of that, because Abdul, who I spoke to, who turns out to be the leader [Abdul Ghani Baradar is the political leader of the Taliban.  Trump demanded that he be released from a Pakistani prison in 2019.  Trump negotiated a secret deal with Ghani in 2020 to withdraw all US troops.], Abdul, who was the leader, would not let anyone do anything, and I can tell you what happened, in my opinion.  [So, not what happened, just what Trump wants people to believe happened.]  [… Trump’s story cut… ]”

“It’s about the withdrawal.  It’s not about getting out, because getting out is something I wanted to do for a LONG time,” Trump claim, again unaware that he knows someone who could’ve done that between 2017 and 2020.  “And they’re right when they say a lot of generals di–we have, by the way, we have great generals in our military, but not the television generals, not the guys you see on television.  You look at what I did with ISIS and how we beat ’em [ISIS has claimed responsibility for today’s attacks at Kabul airport.], we beat them with great generals.  We had great, great leadership.  We have the greatest military in the world, but we look at a bunch of fools.”  [… editing …]

“But I wanted to get out, but we had to get out with dignity,” Trump continues.  “We had to take out 80 billion dollars’ worth of equipment.  We had to do all of the things that you know we had to do.  [Just a reminder:  Trump didn’t do any of it.]  And then I would’ve blowed up [sic] all the air bases but I would’ve kept Bagram because Bagram’s located right next to China, right near China [It’s not.], and Iran [Bagram is on the other side of Afghanistan from Iran.], and it’s in Afghanistan [Wow, he got that right.] so we had the whole group covered.  They spent ten billion dollars building it [Bagram Air Base has been around since the 1950s.] and we handed out the keys.  It’s the craziest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Jesus Dork endorses “Soros paid protestors” theory

4 hours ago

Charlotte BASE jumper dials 911 while dangling from building

5 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Steamy hot volcanic action! NSFW!

7 hours ago

Bondi holding up release of JFK, RFK, MLK, and Epstein files

7 hours ago

Tennessee libtard arrested for threatening attack on Musk AI center

8 hours ago

“DOGE AI” automates rapid MAGA response to lib tweets

9 hours ago

Lahaina fire survivors fired by Trump Regime

10 hours ago

Fake fishing boat captain acted normal until he didn’t

10 hours ago

West Bank Judea and Samaria

11 hours ago

Tiny D less than thrilled with Donald endorsing Donalds

12 hours ago

Michigan MAGA Muslim demands Trump immediately take down “offensive” Gaza AI video and issue a “reconciliatory statement”

13 hours ago

Colorado cops nab one of several Tesla dealership vandals

13 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor’s first cabinet meeting

14 hours ago

Texas kid first to die in measles outbreak

15 hours ago

Feature, not bug

15 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: House hearing on Birthright Citizenship

16 hours ago

Surprise! House GOP tells members to cut back on town halls

17 hours ago

Eric Adams moves to dismiss over Sassoon shitshow

17 hours ago

Fourth Estatesman sees two-red siren emoji-fire for press freedom

18 hours ago

“Maybe we will create some NICE NEW LAW!!!”

18 hours ago

USDA cuts off food stamps to illegal immigrants

19 hours ago

Orange Ayatollah posts absolutely batshit “Trump Gaza” AI video

21 hours ago

Nepalese Hindu festival just one giant cloud of weed smoke

21 hours ago

House GOP pulls plug on budget vote

1 day ago

WATCH LIVE: House to vote on government funding

1 day ago

MAGA Reich to create undocumented immigrant registry

1 day ago

Orange Overlord wants to sell citizenships for $5 million

1 day ago

What a total bundle of sticks

1 day ago

Zelensky to sign minerals deal with Trump Regime: Axios

1 day ago

Judge denies TMTG bid to hit De Moraes with restraining order

1 day ago

Mysterious “DOGE Administrator” revealed!

1 day ago

“You can protest all you want”

1 day ago

Blondi proud of inhuman conditions suffered at Guantanamo

1 day ago

Kevin Cramer’s skull oozing profusely

2 days ago

Spanberger 39 – Sears 24 in Virginia gov race: poll

2 days ago

Right on time, almost

2 days ago

“That’s why the 60 Minutes episode rubbed people the wrong way”

2 days ago

Regime DOJ says pardon covered Oath Keeper’s hand grenades

2 days ago

Nicole Malliotakis pretty much gives up on excuses for DOGE

2 days ago

Mike Johnson sets mega MAGA budget vote for Monday evening

2 days ago

Australian fisher becomes the fished

2 days ago

Soros or Xi or Bill Gates or someone paid for this

2 days ago

European Tesla sales drop 45 percent in January

2 days ago

Private sector solution to deportations eyed by private sector

2 days ago

Senate delaying Stefanik confirmation vote

2 days ago

Picasso no longer available for adoption in Muscatine, Iowa

2 days ago

Los Angeles ICE raid sweeps up 12 out of 120 targeted

2 days ago

Coast Guard urges Great Lakes-area residents to be careful on ice

2 days ago

Wyoming Republican suddenly in favor of “preferred pronouns”

2 days ago

Judge denies AP bid for injunction on White House access

2 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x