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Russian Orthodox leader tells conscripts they’ll be resurrected

Though the situation on the ground in Ukraine has been better for them lately thanks to Republicans in Congress taking way too fucking long to send more aid to Kyiv, Russian military conscripts still have it pretty rough and leaders are looking for new ways to make it seem like less of a violent nightmare to those bound for the front. The Daily Beast reports one Russian Orthodox Church leader has conjured up a new way to improve morale: Tell men they can be miraculously resurrected.

“In war, there are no unbelievers! When you are facing physical death, every fiber of your soul comes alive. Right now, there are many wonderful testimonies of Christ’s victory over death. My wife sends me many military testimonies and video clips. Before Lent, I watched a video about one Chinese man who participated in the special military operation. A bullet hit him in the stomach, destroying all of his insides. He died from this and then was resurrected,” Russian Orthodox Church Archpriest Artemiy Vladimirov said during a bit on Russia’s state-run version of Fox News earlier this month.

“Saint Luke of Crimea appeared to him and completely healed him, his insides were fully restored. He was baptized along with his relatives, all of them are photographed together, dressed in white clothes, baptized into our Orthodox Church,” Vladmirov continued, unsubtly telling fans of the Soyuz TV network they could be resurrected in combat too if they just have some faith in the Holy Kremlin.

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