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Michigan Supreme Court allows abortion rights ballot measure

The Michigan state Supreme Court on Thursday gave the green light for the November abortion rights ballot measure, held up by the Republicans on the state Board of Canvassers over – no joke – the fucking kerning on the measure’s explanatory text as it would appear on the ballots.

A ruling on the voting rights ballot measure it was to be paired with is still pending, as it was also blocked by the Republican canvassers over the same kerning bullshit, but by itself the abortion referendum is seriously bad freaking news for Republicans at all levels in Michigan who were already facing an uphill battle in the statewide races. Now with a number of swingy US House districts on the line for the GOP, a surge in women voters is the last thing they needed.

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NPR reporter obtains copy of recalled “2000 Mules” book

After a not particularly-lengthy search of Los Angeles-area bookstores, NPR reporter Tom Dreisbach was able to find a copy of the print adaptation of Dinesh D’Souza’s shitty election that the staff of a Barnes and Noble did not send back to the publisher following its abrupt recall.

And, hoooo boy, as Dreisbach writes, it “does not appear to suffer from an obvious production error which might explain the delay – a misaligned photo, incorrect page numbers or blank pages,” but some bad, bad, naughty defamation stuff so ugly that D’Souzas partners in the film, MAGA activists Cathy Engelbrecht and Gregg Phillips of “True the Vote” wanted nothing to do with the book.

Long and very stupid story as short as possible: D’Souza, Engelbrecht, and Phillips took random GPS data from cell phones moving around the metro Atlanta area in the five weeks before the 2020 election – for which Phillips paid $2 million to obtain from a vendor – and claimed in the movie it showed repeated patterns of individual unidentified smartphones going from ballot drop boxes to unnamed Dem-aligned organizations’ offices, thus “proving” that there was a whole syndicate of illegal ballot harvesters throwing the election to Biden. Thing is they didn’t actually name these organizations in the film since – surprise! – they were afraid of getting sued for it, because God forbid D’Souza and pals might have to prove their allegations in a court of law, thus vindicating themselves and pretty much every other 2020 election conspiracy theorist out there.

Anyway the organizations are named in the book. Dreisbach doesn’t mention their names in his article, but it’s doubtful he’s the only one out there with a copy that survived the recall, so stay tuned for that and some defamation lawyers’ eyes turning into large cartoony dollar signs.

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Justice Department to appeal Trump special master ruling

Justice Department lawyers on Thursday filed a notice of appeal of Judge Aileen Cannon’s ruling that her client, disgraced former President Trump, was entitled to a special master to review the documents that Trump stole and were seized by the FBI during last month’s raid at Mar-a-Lago.

UPDATE 9/8/2022 4:15 PM EDT: The Justice Department also filed an application for a stay pending appeal on Thursday, writing “Although the government respectfully disagrees with the Court’s injunction as to a much broader set of seized materials already in the possession of the investigative team, it is not at this time seeking a stay as to the vast majority of those materials. Instead, this motion is limited to the Order’s directives with respect to the seized classified records because those aspects of the Order will cause the most immediate and serious harms to the government and the public. The classified records – a discrete set of just over 100 documents -have already been segregated from the other seized records and are being maintained separately.”

Which we believe means they can move forward with prosecuting Trump for stealing the classified shit while the special master circlejerk would continue separate and apart. Very bad for Donald and showing that his grossly incompetent lawyers moved way too slow in asking for the special master.

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Last MyPillow mall store closes

Fans of both the British monarchy and Mike Lindell suffered a double tragedy Thursday as local Minnesota news site BringMeTheNews.com reports the Rosedale MyPillow store, the brand’s second-to-last known physical retail location has closed down, leaving only the factory outlet in Shakopee serving MAGA-themed pillow lovers who don’t want to buy stuff over the internet.

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Now is Meghan Markle’s chance to seize power Queen Elizabeth II dead at 96 before we could finish this ridiculous joke piece

From her humble beginnings as a kid who started a nationally publicized letter-writing campaign to get a dish soap brand to change a sexist TV commercial that said “Women across America are switching to blah blah blah soap” to “People across America are switching to blah blah blah soap,” to acting on some USA Network show that nobody watched, to securing an iron grip on the affections of Prince Harry, few Americans around today have so quintessentially embodied our nation’s hustle and can-do spirit quite like the now Duchess of Something, Meghan Markle.

Now’s her chance to take it to the next level, and plant Old Glory in its place over the Union Jack, securing the Crown for America once and for all. First, while the rest of the Royal Family are distracted, Markle needs to steal the Britannia Regnum ring from Elizabeth’s bedside table, and tell Prince Charles that she needs to step out for a minute as she just got a very important email from one of her old co-stars on that USA Network show about recording a commentary track for a new special edition DVD and Blu-Ray box set of the entire series hitting stores this fall.

Next, she’ll need to disguise herself as a cocaine dealer to sneak into Parliament. The cops won’t let her in without the cocaine so she’ll have to pick up a kilo or two on her way to London… AND OH SHIT THE QUEEN IS DEAD. GODDAMMIT THIS TOOK TOO LONG TO WRITE.

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Special prosecutor named in probe of MAGA Michigan attorney general candidate DePerno’s theft of election equipment

Pursuant to incumbent Democrat Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel’s admirable recusal from investigating her complete dickbag opponent Matthew DePerno, the state Prosecuting Attorneys Coordinating Council have named a special prosecutor to investigate DePerno’s involvement in a scheme to steal Dominion Voting Systems equipment from local election offices, the AP reports.

Muskegon County prosecuting attorney DJ Hillson will begin handling the case with just two months to go before DePerno faces the voters who he doesn’t give a fuck about and will tamper with the integrity of their elections chasing bullshit theories they were hacked by Italian satellites or Chinese thermostats to steal the 2020 election from fat former President Trump.

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In another episode of “Massive Projection Playhouse,” Trump administration used US Attorneys to harass political opponents

As Donald Trump and his various scandal-embroiled cohorts claim the Justice Department is acting politically in various investigations, a new book by a former US Attorney in the Trump DOJ alleges Trump and his numerous and sundry Attorneys General pushed front-line federal prosecutors to chase wisps of allegations against Trump’s political opponents to aid his political standing, the New York Times reports.

Geoffrey S. Berman, the US Attorney for the influential Southern District of New York from January 2018 to June 2020, writes in his upcoming book “Holding the Line” that Trump wanted SDNY to undertake a criminal investigation into former Senator and Secretary of State John Kerry for his work to keep nuclear weapons out of Iran’s arsenal, a mission Kerry continued on after Trump unilaterally violated the multinational Iran nuclear deal President Barack Obama had negotiated.

In other cases–such as the conviction of former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen and an investigation into the former White House Counsel for Barack Obama–DOJ officials pressured Berman to file court motions to influence the outcome of the 2018 midterm elections.

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Steve Bannon facing 15 years in prison

Alcoholic degenerate white nationalist Steve Bannon faces 15 years in a New York States prison on charges including money laundering in the first and second degrees and conspiracy in the forth degree stemming from the “We Build the Wall” scam the Washington Post reports following Bannon’s Thursday surrender. Bannon is already looking at up to two years in a federal prison for fucking off on a lawfully served subpoena from the House January 6th Select Committee.

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Trump endorses Bolsonaro for reelection

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Donald J. TrumpVerified Account

@realDonaldTrump
President Jair Bolsonaro of Brazil,“Tropical Trump” as he is affectionately called, has done a GREAT job for the wonderful people of Brazil. When I was President of the U.S., there was no other country leader who called me more than Jair seeking Tariff & Tax cuts, Trade Renegotiations, Strengthened Drug & Border Policies (to put the “bad guys” in jail!), Military Help, & more. President Bolsonaro loves Brazil beyond all else. He is a wonderful man, and has my Complete & Total Endorsement!!!

3,063 11,215 Sep 08, 2022, 08:53

The Orange God Emperor is 1 for 2 so far in endorsements of foreign autocrats after Hungarian Dictator Viktor Orban cruised to reelection earlier this year following Trump’s enthusiastic message of support. Also on Thursday the Donald threatened to sue Fox News for airing ads by the Lincoln Project in a separate post on his failing platform Truth Social. “The Perverts and Lowlifes of the Lincoln Project are back on, where else, Fox News. I thought they ran away to the asylum after their last catastrophic campaign, with charges made against them that were big time sleaze, and me getting many millions more votes in 2020 than I got in 2016. The Paul Ryun run Fox only has high standards for ‘Trump’ ads, but not for anyone else. The Perverts should not be allowed to ‘false advertise,’ and Fox News should not allow it to happen. See you all in Court!!!” wrote Trump.

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FEC unanimously tosses “Zuckerbucks” complaint

By a 6-0 vote made public on Thursday, the Federal Election Commission in July unanimously dismissed a complaint from some right wing asshole in Wisconsin which charged that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s $400 million donation to help local election bureaus operate in 2020 amid the COVID-19 shitshow was somehow nefarious. The fake “Zuckerbucks” conspiracy theory, subject of a shitty documentary screened for an audience at Mar-a-Lago earlier this year.

Setting aside the fact that toxic boomer bullshit propagated on Facebook did more to help elect Republicans in 2016 than Hillary Clinton herself, the complaint speaks a lot to the unremitting hostility right wingers have toward anything and everything that makes it easier for people to vote. Of course they wouldn’t have given a shit about it if Trump had won.

But because Zuck’s money made it easier for underfunded county clerks’ offices to conduct the election smoothly and Trump would almost have certainly came out on top had it been chaotic and irregular, we guess they’re right when they say it helped Joe Biden win. It’s the same mindset that went into Republicans blocking election security bills in early 2020: They knew full well a Russian cyberattack or a MAGA terrorist bombing a polling place or tabulation site was in their interest.

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His “War Room” proven to be lame metaphor as Trump Advisor obediently surrenders to Manhattan court on fraud charges

Three-shirted troll Steve Bannon, who has said on his podcast that the American people need to rise up against the oppression of the government, meekly surrendered himself at a Manhattan courthouse Thursday morning to face fraud charges, CNBC reports, although he bloviated all the way into custody.  Bannon faces charges relating to fraud for bilking people out of tens of millions of dollars for a fake “build the wall” campaign to privately fund a border wall on the Southern border, for which he and three accomplices in the scam were arrested by federal authorities in August 2020.

Bannon was granted an eleventh hour pardon against federal charges by disgraced former President Trump before he left office, but not the others. Two of them, Brian Kolfage and Andrew Badolato, pleaded guilty earlier this year and will be sentenced in December, while the fourth, Tim Shea, faces a second trial after his first one ended in a mistrial because one MAGA asshole on the jury refused to convict.  The Manhattan district attorney will charge Bannon under state statutes, which were not covered by the presidential pardon.

Bannon already faces up to two years in jail for his two convictions for contempt of Congress, brought after he refused to comply with subpoenas requesting information and testimony about his involvement and communications relating to the January 6th Republican-led domestic terrorist attack on Congress that Bannon touted in the days prior to the event.

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Queen Elizabeth under medical supervision as grandchildren travel to Scotland to be at her side

Longtime British monarch Queen Elizabeth has canceled meetings and been instructed by doctors to rest, as her medical team stated they were “concerned for Her Majesty’s health,” USA Today reports.

Prince Harry, his wife Duchess Meghan, and Prince William are all traveling to Balmoral Castle, her Scottish castle about 500 miles north of London to be at their 96-year-old grandmother’s side.  Officials say the Queen is under “medical supervision.”

Newly appointed Prime Minister Liz Truss tweeted, “The whole country will be deeply concerned by the news from Buckingham Palace this lunchtime.  My thoughts — and the thoughts of people across our United Kingdom — are with Her Majesty The Queen and her family at this time.”

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“Interesting Idea”

Senate Minority Leader Moscow Mitch was asked by Punchbowl News on Wednesday if he thinks National Republican Senate Committee chairman Senator Rick Scott should donate some of his own vast fortune gained from the massive Medicare fraud – reportedly the largest in American history – he pulled in the private sector to plug the hole in their increasingly dire finances.

“Interesting idea,” said Mitch, who has reportedly been pissed at Scott for fucking off to Italy last month (with some believing Mitch himself leaked news of to the media) as well as in general doing a shit job managing the party’s national Senate fundraising strategy. It’s not entirely unheard of since Scott did partially self-fund, in the loosest sense of the term since he’s wealthy as a result of ripping off American taxpayers, his own campaigns for Florida governor and the senate.

When asked on Wednesday if he would cough it up, Scott said “I think everybody has the opportunity to be helpful and I hope they all are helpful.” A Punchbowl reporter asked “So does that mean you’ll do it?” Scott then said “I think everybody should do what they can do to be helpful.”

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Federal prosecutors open investigation into Trump slush fund

The federal grand jury investigating the failed Trump coup and the January 6th Capitol riot have expanded their probe into the “Save America PAC” slush fund started by the disgraced former president in November 2020, just days after his humiliating loss to Joe Biden, ABC News reports.

Sources say the interest in the still-ongoing scam operation stemmed from testimony from witnesses questioned about the coup itself. Prosecutors want to know more about Save America’s formation, fundraising, and expenditures since the Republican commissioners on the FEC won’t do shit even when the fucking PAC itself submits paperwork to them listing $60,000 in payments to Melania Trump’s dressmaker as being for “STRATEGY CONSULTING.”

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Dems 48 – GOP 44 on generic ballot: Marist/NPR/PBS poll

Democrats lead Republicans 48 to 44 on the generic ballot question of the monthly Marist-NPR-PBS Newshour survey, an improvement for the MAGA party over the Dem 48 – GOP 41 found in the August edition. However the slight gain against a static Dem number comes with some other not really great findings for Republicans in terms of issues, as the number of respondents calling inflation their top issue dropped from 37% to 30% while abortion rose from 18% to 22%. President Joe Biden’s approval rating increased to 41% from 38% in August and 36% in July.

“The Supreme Court’s decision on Dobbs this summer has had a major impact on electoral politics heading toward the midterm elections,” said Marist College polling egghead Lee Miringoff. “Not only are Democrats more motivated to vote than Republicans because of the Court’s decision, Democrats remain energized whereas Republican interest has faded since June.”

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Trump not actually sucking up that much of GOP donor money

Disgraced former President Trump’s slush fund, which he spends on God knows what, has on and off over the last year and a half been blamed by Republican insiders for siphoning off small donor contributions for what should’ve been directed to the GOP’s efforts to make gains in Congress this November. However Politico’s review of donor data from WinRed – the GOP’s digital money hole – in their words “partially exonerates” the fat orange bastard, as it shows that 13% of donors who used the platform contributed solely to his scam “Save America PAC” organization.

That said, it’s obviously not nothing that Trump is diverting away from GOP campaigns that are actually on the ballot and it comes amid a larger downturn in Republican small donor recruitment on WinRed, which fell from 956,000 contributors in the second half of 2021 to 913,000 in the first half of 2022. Dems on ActBlue meanwhile went from 2 million to 2.5 million in the same two periods.

“Republicans have known for a long time that we were behind in online fundraising. There was always the assumption that we could catch up. Now we’re learning that it’s too late,” Republican strategist Eric Wilson told Politico. “Guess we’ll just have to do what we always do and rely on amoral billionaires to fund our campaigns,” he did not add, but probably thought in his head.

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US sends Excalibur and Blinken to Ukraine

The US military have granted Ukrainian forces the use of its most advanced artillery shell, the GPS-guided, $100,000 per round M982 Excalibur, according to budget documents reviewed by Bloomberg. The shell, which can hit within seven feet of a satellite pinpointed target from up to 25 miles away, is designed to reduce collateral damage. The military first deployed Excaliburs in Iraq and used it to cancel Al-Qaeda leader Abu Jurah and his buddies there in 2007.

In related news, Secretary of State Tony Blinken on Wednesday paid a surprise visit to Kyiv to announce a new $2 billion military aid package for Ukraine and other European countries.

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Republican wants to increase incarceration rate in US [checks notes] which already has the highest incarceration rate on Earth

In “Republicans Promoting Fascism, Part II” we find New York Republican gubernatorial nominee Lee Zeldin telling Fox “personality” Laura Ingraham that the United States needs to incarcerate more people.  For the record, the United States imprisons people at a higher rate than any other nation on the planet.  Not just any First World country; any country at all.  And wanting to incarcerate more people isn’t fascistic or dictatorial at all, right?

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

An economy depending on one guy to not fuck around is…

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