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After the forces of the United States and South Korean military held joint exercises on the peninsula and offshore, petulant Trump pen pal Kim Jong-un ordered his military to fire some short-range missiles into the Sea of Japan, NBC News reports.  US and South Korean forces conducted 48 joint field operations, more than twice as last year, as well as computer command post simulation as well, which the North Korea-state media claimed was preparation for the imminent invasion of the North by the capitalist pigs of the United States and the puppet government of the South.  In retaliation, the North Korean military fired a formidable… um… three short-range missiles into the sea.

When Vladimir Putin says, “Believe me or not,” you truly have but one option.  So when Putin ends his tale that in the days before Russian dissident Alexei Navalny died in a Siberia prison, his officials started to pursue a prisoner swap with Western government for Russians they were holding, you gotta believe him, right?

According to NBC News, Putin noted in a brief press appearance as he celebrated his fourth re-election as Russian President, that “several days before Mr. Navalny perished, I was told by some of my colleagues … that there is an idea to exchange Mr. Navalny for some people in prison in Western countries,” adding, “Believe me or not, the person talking to me hardly finished their sentence when I said: ‘I agree.’ But unfortunately, the thing that happened happened.

PEAK BLOOM! PEAK BLOOM! PEAK BLOOM! Did we say PEAK BLOOM?!
The blossoms are opening & putting on a splendid spring spectacle. See you soon.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸! https://t.co/h04Gu0ksc1 #CherryBlossom #BloomWatch #WashingtonDC pic.twitter.com/ElYKjPB3UH

— National Mall NPS (@NationalMallNPS) March 17, 2024

The cherry blossom trees along the Tidal Basin and the National Mall in Washington, DC are hitting peak bloom, three days before the Cherry Blossom Festival is supposed to begin and nearly two weeks before the expected date of bloom peak.  This marks the second earliest peak bloom recorded since 1921:  In 1990, blossoms peaked on March 15th.

With the region staying above freezing temperatures since February 26th, the blossoms started their emergence early again, continuing a long-term trend that shifted expected peaks from early April to late March, according to data collected by the EPA.  Besides ruining the Cherry Blossom Festival, which will run from March 20th to April 14th, early and unexpected blooms will take an economic toll on local businesses as tourists will cancel sightseeing trips.   Well done, climate change!

Feels like it’s been a while since the right wing propaganda industrial complex freaked the fuck out so uniformly (with one minor exception right below) over some shit that came out of their dear leader’s mouth. Funny how the actual policy stuff – abortion, tariffs, etc – that he spews out doesn’t ever seem to worry the vox populi of the MAGA web as much as this “bloodbath” comment did:

“I watched a clip of the comments in question, and I don’t think Trump was ‘looking for’ anything. He was speaking spontaneously, talking about Chinese inroads into the auto industry and about China building plants in Mexico, and – as he often does – he used a flamboyant term – ‘bloodbath’ – to describe chaos in the auto industry and the economy in general if Biden wins in November. He was not threatening violence, he was not shouting and angry like Biden, and he was not bathed in menacing red light” – The current top comment on the PJ Media article titled “Trump Warns of a ‘Bloodbath’ if He’s Not Elected. The Reaction Is Exactly What Trump Was Looking For.” The PJ Media writer, Rick Moran, seems to have kind of zigged when he was supposed to zag in when he wrote glowingly that “Donald Trump pulled his ‘Charlie Brown and Lucy Disappearing Football Trick’ at a rally in Ohio on Saturday. And like Charlie Brown, Joe Biden and the media fell for it again.”

“And remember, they convinced half of the electorate that it was Sarah Palin and not Tina Fey that said, ‘I can see Russia from my house'” – Top comment on an Instapundit post about the headlines.

“There is no bottom to how low the Democrats will go to win in November. This is mild compared to what is to come from them” – Top comment on Red State’s article, titled “They Have No Conscience: Pelosi Spreads New Hoax Against Trump.” Lol at the headline and inshallah to the commenter.

“Unfortunately, way too many Americans STILL take what the media puts out, as gospel” – The top comment on the Right Scoop’s article. Nailed it. News consumers have to be more skeptical these days… unless it’s from any one of the outlets linked in this article. They’re not “the media,” lol.

“But they have no problem with Biden threatening to use F 16s against American citizens, more than once… Their faux outrage is hilarious” – Top comment on Gateway Pundit’s article. No idea what the fuck this moron is talking about with using F-16 fighter jets on Americans. It’s not like any of the replies expressed any skepticism or even a “Huh, I never heard about that. Where’d you read it?”

Russian President Vladimir Putin was reelected to an historic fifth term on Sunday, another triumph over the opposition in the world’s geographically largest country and a defeat for western critics who have alleged Putin ordered an illegal invasion of Ukraine in 2022 and incarcerated scandal-tarred liberal activist Alexei Navalny, who mysteriously died in prison last month.

The win further extends a remarkable period of political stability for Russia not seen since 1921 through 1989, when it was governed as a society with guaranteed equality and people’s basic needs were mostly provided for through government subsidies. It was during this time when Putin began his career in politics by working for an important government foreign policy agency and was tasked with helping to prevent a resurgence of Nazi ideology in eastern Germany. From there Putin rose through the ranks and through a combination of what some observers have called “savvy” and “genius” he consolidated his power over the post-Soviet Russian state to become its leader.

Putin’s agenda next term calls for increases in military spending and recruitment, securing the border with Ukraine, and stirring up a sense of patriotism and duty among average Russians.

National Zero will resume our regular news coverage now that we’ve objectively reported on President Vladimir Putin’s popularity as reflected by his huge margins in the 2024 election.

After his usual bullshit rant about the 2020 election being stolen, fat former President Trump told Fox News media reporter Howie Kurtz that the network “may want to cut that one out.” Kurtz instead interrupted the broadcast of the pre-taped interview with a disclaimer saying “there is no independent evidence of widespread fraud.” Trump did not mention Dominion or Smartmatic specifically but we guess the top right wing propaganda network feels better safe than sorry on this.

On that note, it’s worth asking if Mark Zuckerberg and/or Facebook might have an actual malice claim against the fat fuck for his rants about them, which again surfaced in this interview, as did Trump defending his 2022 call to “terminate” the constitution so he could be reinstated, and repeated that deranged story about Obama and Biden “spying” on his 2016 campaign. The Orange God Emperor also said nothing to walk back on his threats to defund Medicare and Social Security or “moderate” on abortion. All of it after a lot of shit about Ukraine and Putin.

Former Vice President Mike Pence on Sunday told CBS’s Margaret Brennan that “as a Christian I’m required to” forgive his fat former boss for trying to get him killed on January 6th, 2021. He probably wanted to reference something along the lines of Luke 23:34 in which Jesus said “Forgive them father, for they do not know what they are doing” while dying on the cross, but that might’ve seemed a little overdramatic considering that the rioters did not actually publicly execute Pence.

More seriously, Mike’s apostasy to the Orange Pharaoh might just be worth watching going forward, provided of course that he doesn’t come out in October and say publicly that he’s “prayed on it” and decided to endorse Trump for president again or some other such bullshit.

NEW: Statement from @MAGAIncWarRoom’s @__Pfeiffer on this outright and dishonest lie from Politico

Full statement and background: https://t.co/wie2Dzqis4 https://t.co/OPyAXsm9ql pic.twitter.com/U6BhMvuiMx

— Kaelan Dorr (@KDORR_USA) March 17, 2024

Here’s Trump propagandist Kaelen Dorr stuck spending his weekend trying to spin the fat former President’s deranged and violent “bloodbath” rhetoric from the Saturday Ohio rally when he should be stuck spending his weekend trying to spin all the other stupid, crazy shit Donald said at the rally.

At the annual Gridiron Club dinner in Washington, DC on Saturday night, President Biden needled his Republican opponent for his age and ongoing legal difficulties, commenting that Donald Trump exhibits signs that his advanced age has led to mental decline and lapses in judgment, the Associated Press reports.

“One candidate is too old and mentally unfit to be president,” said in his ten-minute address.  “The other is me.”  Noting that 77-year-old Trump failed to correctly identify two of his wives in a photo, Biden also commented that Trump seemed confused about the 2024 campaign.  “Don’t tell him, [but] he thinks he’s running against Barack Obama.  That’s what he said,” Biden commented.

This was Biden’s first address as president at the Gridiron Club, a professional organization for journalists that has become a traditional stop for presidential candidates.  After taking shots at Trump, Biden then reminded the assembled journalists of their import role in maintaining American democracy.

An anonymous Republican Senator spoke to CNN’s Manu Raju and described the Ohio GOP Senate primary between bi-curious car dealer Bernie Moreno and Cleveland Indians Guardians ownership scion state Senator Matt Dolan (screw dipshit Secretary of State Frank LaRose) as a “bizarre situation in which JD Vance, Donald Trump, and Chuck Schumer are all on the same side” in trying to get Moreno nominated to face incumbent Dem Senator Sherrod Brown in November.

“It looks to me like the Democrats believe [Moreno is] the easiest to beat,” the Senator continued, which is kind of no shit since Dems have been spending to boost him (and to get a special endorsement). “It’s illustrative of some of the problems we’ve had in recent years, with Trump dictating the nominations,” and lol this source definitely already endorsed the Orange Slob.

Delegations from Israel and Hamas restarted negotiations for a ceasefire in Gaza, even though Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu calling Hamas’s first set of demands “absurd” as he continues to plan for an expected attack on Rafah, a city in Gaza along the Egyptian border where more than 1.2 million Palestinian refugees have gathered, Politico reports.

Hamas wants Israel to release hundreds of Palestinian prisoners its holding, and in exchange, Hamas has promised to initially release many of the remaining hostages it took during the October 7th attack, including women, the sick and the elderly, in addition to female Israeli soldiers it captured.  Hamas also laid out plans to release the remaining hostages after a long-term cease-fire has been agreed to.

Gaza is in the midst of a major humanitarian crisis as shortages of food, water and medical supplies in the besieged area are scarce.  Various nations and humanitarian organizations have tried to deliver supplies to the residents and refugees via truck convoys and airlifts with limited success.  On Saturday (local time), a Cyprian tug pulling a barge carrying 200 tons of rice, flour, lentils, beans, tuna and canned meat became the first vessel to deliver supplies via a new sea route to Gaza.  The shipment was arranged by Chef Jose Andres’ World Central Kitchen, a humanitarian organization that helps feed people in strife-stricken regions.  A second barge will depart Cyprus when the final supplies from the first are distributed.

Protesting in a way murdered dissident Alexei Navalny had outlined prior to his death, Russians lined up in lines at polling stations on Sunday to cast their ballots opposing the continued rule of Russian President Vladimir Putin, who is destined to win his fifth six-year term in office, the Washington Post reports.

The “Noon Against Putin” action encouraged Russians to line up on the last day of the three-day voting people to show the unification of the opposition against the long-time Russian autocrat, who put rules in place that will ensure he wins this election and the next one, leaving him in place until at least 2036.  Putin has ordered opponents murdered or exiled, or as in the case of Navalny, both.

The polls were largely empty before noon when people started queuing up to vote, forming long lines to enter the polling stations despite the Russian government warning people against participating in “extremist action” and protests.  The Kremlin attempted to suppress such in-person demonstrations by introducing a completely trustworthy online voting system to ensure Putin got all the votes he wanted.

In an op/ed published in a state paper earlier this week, the former mother-in-law of Nevada Republican Elizabeth Helgelien accused the Congressional candidate of being an adulterer who “raised a murderer,” the daughter she had with the woman’s son.

In the Nevada Globe, Christine Halseth asked if Helgelien is “The Worst Congressional Candidate Ever?” and then goes on to detail how Helgelien had multiple affairs when she was in an 11-year marriage to her son who lived with the family in Las Vegas as she served as a state senator in Carson City.  “It was quite the hypocritical turn for someone who was elected to state senate on a platform of family values and who called for then-U.S. Sen. John Ensign to resign after his extramarital affair became public, Halseth wrote.  “During that time, Elizabeth was also caught lying about her education, claiming she was pursuing an MBA when she didn’t even have a bachelor’s degree.”

After describing a really screwed up family life which saw Helgelien try her hand at modeling and moving herself and her children to Texas, Halseth said her son also moved after one of the children made a claim Elizabeth was abusing them, but it ended badly. “In April of 2021, deeply affected by her mother’s scandalous infidelity and her parents’ public divorce, Sierra and her 18-year-old boyfriend murdered Daniel in cold blood, stabbing him more than 70 times.”  The pair are now serving life sentences.  “In other words, Elizabeth raised a murderer and now wants to be a member of Congress,” Halseth summarized making a damn good case that her ex-daughter-in-law actually is the worst candidate for Congress this election cycle.

When Republican Texas Governor and King of Wombs Greg Abbott introduced his program to bus migrants from Texas to Democratic-run cities or other perceived liberal havens, he promised that the bulk of the cost of the $150 million effort would be picked up by donors.  CNN reports, however, that the state has received only $1.45 million in pledges over the last two years–and the bulk of that coming from an apparent fraudulent account.

Data provided by the state show an individual making a $900,000 donation to the program, which Abbott has cited as one of the many ways he screws people over to “own the libs.”  But no related deposit has been made to the state treasury, indicating the online submission was either a mistake, a fraud, or turned down by a financial institution. Reporters could not locate an actual person matching the information provided with the donation.

The online site promoted by Abbott to track donations reduced its total to $460,000, although it’s unclear how much of that the state has actually collected versus what was pledged.  Checking with other donors, one, a GOP donor, said he had not authorized the charge.  Another said he had filed a complaint with the state that his donation for a border wall had instead been used on Abbott’s busing program.

With hospitals in rural America struggling to stay open because of corporate consolidations and market competition, the Biden Administration introduced a new program that would redesignate the facilities as “emergency care” only, paying them to eliminate long-term care to streamline networks, ABC News reports.

The program creates a new designation called a “rural emergency center,” where patients, ambulances, and others can seek immediate care as they would at a more conventional hospital, but there will be no beds or scheduled operations.  These facilities will provide care to stabilize the patient, but patients would be moved to another facility for additional medical treatment or told to seek follow-up care at another medical center or provider.

Nineteen hospitals in the Southeast have joined the program, which targets small hospitals that have already seen significant drops in in-patient care because larger, more modern facilities in nearby towns have taken the patient load.  To support these hospitals that continue to play a vital role in providing immediate emergency care for the community, the program has a $3 million budget to split between the participating hospitals, and they’ll receive higher Medicare reimbursements as well.

In another sign that Vladimir Putin’s ambitions do not stop with the Donbas region of Ukraine as his American admirers would have you believe, the Latvian national security services started a criminal investigation into a Latvian member of the European Parliament believed to be a Russian spy, the Associated Press reports.

After some very brave journalists in Latvia, Estonia, Sweden and particularly in Russia published uncovered communications between 73-year-old Tatjana Ždanoka and her Russian handlers, the Latvian federal security service started criminal proceedings against her on February 22nd, alleging she had been an agent for the FSB, Russia’s spy agency, since 2004.

Ždanoka has been an outspoken advocate for the minority Russian populations in Latvia and Estonia, claiming they are being oppressed by the ethnic majority populations in each nation.  Communications with her handlers allegedly show some of those themes being coordinated with Kremlin efforts to sow unrest within those enclaves.  The claim of oppression by Russian populations in Ukraine was one of the excuses the Kremlin has used to take Ukrainian territory. 

This rally in Ohio is apparently one for the ages in a campaign cycle already marred by some like serious deterioration of the fat bastard’s mental state. This might not even be the worst moment.

“So there’s something you need to know about me,” Ohio Republican Senate candidate and Trump-endorsed car dealer Bernie Moreno, who was recently found to have once placed an ad for a male sexual companion on an online hook-up site, advises the crowd as he warms up a Trump rally in Ohio.  “I am one of the luckiest people you’ll ever meet because 35 years ago, I won the lottery and got to marry that woman right there.”  Which is a completely normal way for a politician who’s really, really not sexually attracted to men to open his speech, right?

Here was soft-chinned Fox News contributor Marc Thiessen warning this week that his party’s dumpy orange slob of a presidential nominee’s relatively weak showing in the primaries – relatively as in they would’ve been absolutely apocalyptic for Biden and it’s a fair enough comparison given how Donald’s been dubbed a “quasi-incumbent” – spells trouble for him in the general election, something not even the mainstream media is really entertaining these days. In fact Politico is saying the opposite, even though you know they’d be like “OMG BIDEN IS SO FUCKED IN NOVEMBER” if Dean Phillips had put up anywhere close to the kind of numbers Nikki Haley did.

That’s Thiessen in his TV gig. In print he’s with the Washington Post, and pouring way more emotion into being down on the Orange God Emperor with a piece titled “I want to support Trump. He keeps making that harder for me,” writing “I want to vote for Donald Trump in November. The question is: Will he let me? I’m not a Never Trumper. To the contrary, I’ve spilled gallons of ink in the pages of this newspaper defending him. Based on his record in office, Trump should be considered one of the greatest conservative presidents we’ve had. But I’m deeply concerned that his second term, if he is elected this year, would not be the one that millions of Americans voted for in 2020.”

Cops in Middletown Township, Pennsylvania on Saturday issued a “shelter in place” order after “confirmed shootings” in neighboring Falls Township that resulted in “several gunshot victims,” the AP reports on more 2nd Amendment rights being expressed openly in the suburbs outside Philly.