Categories
Uncategorized

Secret Service gives up on finding White House cokehead

Sources within the Secret Service tell CNN they’ve concluded their investigation into Cocainegate and, as they warned given the traffic at the location within the White House, have been unable to identify the suspect who dropped a baggie of Colombian snow in the West Wing.

MAGA Congressman Tim Burchett also confirmed the same to CNN Capitol Hill reporter Manu Raju as he left the House Oversight committee’s briefing with Secret Service officials. “That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen in my life,” said Burchett, plainly disappointed they didn’t tell him it was definitely Hunter or Joe Biden who was walking around with the nose candy.

The AP followed up and reports Secret Service investigators were unable to obtain any fingerprints or DNA from the bag. Not to go all “Blue Anon” here but that detail makes it all too easy to imagine that someone with an agenda might’ve made sure that there was nothing traceable on the bag when dropping it in a conspicuous place in the Biden White House. Some low-level fifth columnist with business there but otherwise personally in league with some James O’Keefe types who knows that a lack of conclusion keeps the story hanging in the air for the MAGA media complex.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Trump “looking at” firing Kim Guilfoyle

34 minutes ago

Russian bots taken offline by Ukrainian strikes on data centers

4 hours ago

“Look what The New York Times did to my beautiful Doral”

6 hours ago

DHS raids Ilhan Omar’s home

9 hours ago

Chuck Grassley files 2028 reelection paperwork

1 day ago

Neurodivergent Mormon disclaims agency over US energy supply

2 days ago

Orange Satan’s approval rating new all-time Pew record low

2 days ago

“In actuality, I should have won 8 Nobel Peace Prizes, not just 1”

3 days ago

Vote Republican if you’re mad Trump lost the Nobel Peace Prize

3 days ago

President celebrates bribe from murderous tyrant

3 days ago

ABC News claims embarrassing premature pubaculation on story about Trump boys’ looting of Pentagon with no-bid contracts

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Declining dictator turns the racism up another crank

3 days ago

Nobel tears and butthurt outsourced to dipshit MAGA lawyer

3 days ago

“We wasn’t aware the child was in the car”

3 days ago

Paxton told donors that Cornyn “wants me to lose”

3 days ago

Trump loses Nobel Peace Prize to South African activist

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Michigan and Georgia debate double header

4 days ago

Saggy-breasted old slob trying to incite a race war

4 days ago

Regime currently attempting to indict Cassidy Hutchinson

4 days ago

Super intelligent president designates new enemies

4 days ago

Jaydee’s sophistry muscles clearly pretty worn out

4 days ago

Arizona Dem says she was raped while fixing campaign sign

4 days ago

Hurricane Isaias threatens yet another gas price spike

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Deranged old scumbag says stupid shit

5 days ago

Orange Warlord considering more Iran strikes this month

5 days ago

For You

5 days ago

“We are out here fighting for our lives and these dudes are in some random ass country made up of too many consonants”

5 days ago

High-ranking federal law enforcer complies with Great Leader

5 days ago

Jim Jordan and Sean Hannity demand Jack Smith take off his shirt

5 days ago

Paxton caught complaining privately to donors once again

5 days ago

Top Republican PAC now defending South Carolina

6 days ago

Tom Emmer admits GOP won’t sweep all 13 stolen House seats

6 days ago

Fox Business viewers alerted to incredible investment opportunity

6 days ago

Trump calls South Carolina Dem a “trannie”

1 week ago

President addresses nation on important issue

1 week ago

Dennis Hastert pinned permanently

1 week ago

You’ll never guess who just hired Karoline Leavitt

1 week ago

RNC chair doesn’t deny surrender in North Carolina Senate race

1 week ago

Senate GOP running Paxton ads nationwide during NFL games

1 week ago

Racial slur during DWI arrest, not the DWI arrest itself, the deciding factor in Greg Abbott’s undorsement of Texas House candidate

1 week ago

President saddened by Fox News coverage decisions

1 week ago

Movie Night Saturday: The Fugitive

1 week ago

Trump posts Tom Cotton’s cell phone number

1 week ago

WATCH LIVE: President campaigns in crucial swing state Alabama

1 week ago

Senate GOP PAC pulls plug on North Carolina, turns to Kansas

1 week ago

Fox Business News funereal after shitty monthly jobs report lands

1 week ago

Tom Cotton targeted in Truth Social shitpost over the one thing that Trump has ever been right about: Year-round Daylight Saving Time

1 week ago

Too little, too late

1 week ago

WATCH LIVE: Grandpa flopsweats around Texahoma

2 weeks ago

President declares Iran nuclear threat ended

2 weeks ago

x
x
x
x
x
x