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Writing about convicted felon President Trump’s abrupt halt to tens of billions of federal grants and loans, Politico Playbook’s Tuesday morning newsletter of course goes full on with “Trump’s massive power grab,” just utterly awed by how much of a brute force of nature the fat fuck is with flexing his supreme God-like abilities to shape the political conversation and blah blah blah.

A few paragraphs down is when they note that, well, some people might be affected. “How big a political risk is Trump taking? [emphasis Playbook’s] His supporters are already celebrating the imminent spending purge, but over the next few days, we’re going to discover the full range of programs, projects and initiatives whose funds have suddenly been blocked. And given the sweeping scale of the order, it seems unlikely these will all be glowingly liberal, woke-tastic DEI projects in coastal America. This order is going to affect communities the length and breadth of the country. Be careful what you wish for, Mr President.” WHOA! BETTER PUMP THE BRAKES THERE PLAYBOOK, OTHERWISE YOUR GOD MIGHT SMITE YOU WITH A SIMPLE POINTING OF HIS FINGER.

“But let’s also be clear: Amidst the liberal outrage, it’s important to remember that this was all spelled out by Trump long in advance. Throughout the election campaign, he told America repeatedly that he would reshape the federal government, root out (and even prosecute) his enemies, pardon supporters who were convicted of violent crimes, slash government spending programs en masse and ax huge numbers of federal jobs. And then he won 77 million votes to do exactly that. Those accusing Trump of being anti-democratic might note that this is largely democracy in action.” Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh enough… Seriously fuck you, Politico.

A woman whose home was destroyed in the massive Eaton Fire that killed at least 17 people and devastated the Altadena area of Los Angeles County earlier this month has obtained surveillance video from a gas station showing the fire’s origin from nearby power lines that arced in high winds as evidence in the woman’s lawsuit against Southern California Edison (SCE), CNN reports.

The video itself is a little UFO-ish, in that what is purported to be arcing, falling sparks, and then flames is just little glowing dots amid the blackness. But then it jumps to what’s unmistakably a raging inferno just eight minutes later and obviously any serious plaintiff is going to have other locational data showing that it corresponds to SCE equipment. “This investigation has unearthed video evidence of SCE’s equipment in Eaton Canyon arcing and sparking, followed by an eruption of flames, all at 6:11 pm on January 7, 2025 – the precise moment the Eaton Fire began,” said Jay Edelson, the complainant’s attorney. Images taken by other locals minutes later shows flames raging at the base of transmission towers. Southern California Edison may be just kind of fucked.

Donald Trump is releasing more secrets than any president in history. Matt Taibbi on the top ten mysteries we’re likely to solve.

(0:00) Fauci’s Pardon
(7:32) The J6 Committee’s Pardon
(11:02) The Golden Age of Journalism Has Begun
(17:44) The Major Questions We Should Be Asking… pic.twitter.com/y0hQEScHuw

— Tucker Carlson (@TuckerCarlson) January 27, 2025

Bro-ing out with other complete cock knob has-been Matt Taibbi on Monday, former top Fox News propagandist Tucker Carlson – who looks like he’s well on his way to becoming as puffy and bloated as fellow defenestree Glenn Beck – claimed, with zero evidence whatsoever to back it up, that the US tried to have Russian dictator Vladimir Putin assassinated at some point over the last few years.

“An Indiana man and MAGA insurrectionist, who was pardoned by President Donald Trump for his involvement in the riot at the US Capitol on Jan 6, 2021, was fatally shot while allegedly resisting arrest,” says the lede to Fox News’s article about the death of Matthew Huttle. Wonder how that very National Zero-esque turn of phrase ended up slipping past Fox’s editors.

Triumphal over a fake accomplishment, convicted felon President Trump late Monday posted “The United States Military just entered the Great State of California and, under Emergency Powers, TURNED ON THE WATER flowing abundantly from the Pacific Northwest, and beyond. The days of putting a Fake Environmental argument, over the PEOPLE, are OVER. Enjoy the water, California!!!”

“The military did not enter California. The federal government restarted federal water pumps after they were offline for maintenance for three days. State water supplies in Southern California remain plentiful,” the California state Department of Water Resources posted on Twitter afterward.

The pumping station in question does not in any way connect to Los Angeles, per Politico.

The Capitol rioter previously most famous for getting turned in to the FBI because he bragged to a woman he met on dating app Bumble turns out to have been wanted on a charge of solicitation of a minor for nearly five years before he was arrested and imprisoned for three – until convicted felon President Trump sprung him from federal prison last week, the Houston Chronicle reports.

Texan Andrew Taake, 36, was hit in 2016 with a count of soliciting a person he “believed to be younger than seventeen years of age” with the expectation there would be sexual contact, a third degree felony punishable by up to 10 years in the joint. He dodged the law on that and for assaulting cops during the Capitol insurrection on January 6th, 2021 – until the dumb fuck bragged about it to a woman he matched and chatted with on Bumble. Taake told her he’d been hit with pepper spray close to the frontline between Capitol cops and sent her a selfie he took that day – which she passed along to the FBI who determined from footage that Taake had in fact attacked cops.

So yeah, Trump literally let a credibly accused pedophile out of prison without ordering the Bureau of Prisons staff to check if any of these scumbags had open warrants, which libs should absolutely hammer him just as MAGA did to Biden with their grotesque exploitation of Laken Riley’s death.

Still feeling confident that by Valentine’s Day someone’s going to die because of Trump freeing all these pieces of shit from federal prison. Well someone besides one of the rioters themselves.

Convicted felon President Trump on Monday told his loyal underlings in the House GOP that he’d like to deport repeat offender criminals, ship them off to other countries just like Castro did in 1980. The fat fuck also hinted at another run in 2028, tariffs on semiconductors (which will go great), and an executive order requiring the Defense Department build an “Iron Dome” for the United States.

“Senator Scott Wiener (D-San Francisco) introduced SB 222, the Affordable Insurance and Climate Recovery Act. SB 222 improves insurance affordability in California by shifting the burden of increased insurance costs away from California ratepayers to the fossil fuel companies driving the climate crisis, and makes victims of major climate disasters whole by allowing them to seek damages from fossil fuel companies in court. Major fossil fuel companies intentionally misled the public for decades about the impacts of their products, and now Californians are paying the price with devastating wildfires, mud slides, sea level rise, and skyrocketing insurance costs. When climate disasters strike, SB 222 allows homeowners and businesses to recover damages from the fossil fuel companies responsible for the disasters. The increasing frequency and severity of climate disasters has sent insurance prices skyrocketing across California and has pushed many families into the state’s insurer of last resort, the FAIR Plan,” says a statement on Wiener’s website

“When the costs of climate disasters grow too high, both private insurers and the FAIR Plan recover losses by charging higher prices on California policyholders. By allowing insurance companies and the FAIR Plan to recoup losses for major climate disasters from the fossil fuel companies responsible for the damage, SB 222 provides a major infusion of financial support to stabilize the insurance market and contain the high cost of insurance for Californians,” the statement continued.

The US Senate confirmed former Soros acolyte Scott Bessent as the next US Treasury Secretary, just going by the number of Dems that voted aye for him called so far in the tally via NTD.

An Indiana MAGA insurrectionist should’ve complied with police. Fox 32 Chicago reports 42 year-old Matthew Huttle was killed by a Jasper County Sheriff’s deputy during a traffic stop on Sunday, just six days after he was pardoned for four misdemeanors he’d been hit with for entering the Capitol during the January 6th, 2021 riot incited by convicted felon President Trump.

Huttle had done six months and was released last July. It’s not clear why he got a relatively stiff sentence on misdemeanors others had gotten probation for, but it might’ve had something to do with that he had accompanied his uncle, 64 year-old Dale Huttle, to the riot. Per the Justice Department, Uncle Dale had “approached the front of a crowd of rioters with a long wooden flagpole in hand. He wielded the flagpole at officers, striking at least two officers. Approximately 30 minutes later, he became involved in another altercation in which he appeared to grab an officer’s baton, as he yelled ‘Surrender!'” so yeah, he was convicted on felonies and now back out on the streets.

Further details of Matthew’s demise were unavailable, specifically whether he had pulled a gun on the deputy or tried to ram him with his car or if he got blasted while reaching for his registration. At the same time, Huttle was already out of the clink before Trump pardoned him and then this confrontation occurred. Both of those two data points are to say that the MAGA propaganda-industrial complex doesn’t have to be thanking Jesus that it’s Huttle on a slab and not a cop.

However it took all of SIX DAYS for one of these guys to fuck up. Are we even going to make it until Valentine’s Day before one of the rioters Trump freed from prison does straight up kill a cop or a white sorority girl or does something terrible that’s going to vindicate certain predictions?

“I don’t care if eggs cost $20/dozen, or if milk is $8/gallon, or if my coffee isn’t Colombian, or if I don’t get flowers for Valentine’s Day. These are all material things with work arounds. I care that my country is safe, and my children are safe. That’s priority number one,” posted Twitter user “Sarah Anderson 🇺🇸” on Sunday, not responding or linking to anything, though the context was obvious.

Now canonically a “MAGA Land” article here is supposed to be sourced from the top comment on a right wing news website’s article, or be a roundup of a bunch of them often interspersed with tweets from a few at least-medium-level significant elected Republicans/MAGA media influencers. Any asshole can tweet something and other websites over-rely on said assholes for a lot of their content.

So this wasn’t the easiest editorial decision, even if Anderson’s tweet is now up to 21,000+ likes, which is far, far, far more than any Disqus comment linked here has ever gotten. Would’ve preferred to find the same sentiment in a Fox News or Breitbart reader’s comment but no luck and this “I don’t care if eggs cost $20/dozen” shit is just too damn good to pass up. They already told us, loud and fucking clear, that this is the direction they were going to go in, that inflation was the worst crisis imaginable until it became an act of patriotic sacrifice. It’s just incredible how fast it happened.

“A lot of you folks are missing the point on this, when we remove 20 million + illegal aliens, prices will come down. Don’t get so caught up in the fake news agenda, I don’t actually think eggs will be $20/doz 😅,” Anderson wrote in a follow-up tweet. So she doesn’t think the sacrifice will be required.

It's just too PERFECT pic.twitter.com/wwzqVUpmLV

Selena Gomez breaks down in tears over @ICEgov's new era, barely audible as she laments deportations and says she feels helpless

"I'm so sorry. I wish I could do something, but I can't. I don't know what to do."

The pop singer and…

— Breitbart News (@BreitbartNews) January 27, 2025

Far right extremist Oklahoma state Superintendent of Public Education Ryan Walters – the asshole who’s been trying to buy $5 million worth of Trump Bibles to put in public school classrooms – tells KOCO he’s excited to allow ICE agents onto campuses to round up children and will be supplying whatever information he can about which students are undocumented.

“When we pass this rule through, schools will comply. This is part of their accreditation, part of our accountability measures, they don’t get to pick and choose what laws they go by,” Walters said, adding “This is federal law. This is about securing the border, making sure we’re a law-and-order country, so Oklahoma schools will comply, we will be sure of that from the department of education.”

“Here in Oklahoma, we absolutely will work with President Trump, we will make sure he has the information he needs, any support on enforcing those policies we will happily assist as well,” Walters continued. Asked to address concerns from parents wondering if they should start putting their kids’ proof of citizenship in their backpacks, Walters said “We’re gonna require the information, we’re not gonna do anything like that to put citizens in concern, or that state, we’re gonna make sure they have everything they need, we’re crystal clear on what enforcement looks like… The left has stoked all these fears and lies of what these immigration laws look like.” This is as if it wasn’t Walters himself saying on camera to a local TV station that undocumented kids are going to be rounded up at schools based on information he’s handing over to federal immigration enforcement.

A Miami man who did not want to be named tells CBS News his wife, an illegal immigrant from Venezuela was arrested in an ICE raid on Sunday while she was awaiting a court date to process her application for citizenship, that “everything was good” until the stormtroopers came knocking.

“They just came and they snatched her,” the man told CBS, who writes he “told CBS News Miami that he wanted Mr Trump to let his wife stay in the US, as their 11th anniversary is on Friday.” The article then quotes his “message to the president” as if Trump is going to read this article. “If I get a chance to talk to you, man – please, man – let’s work something out. Let me keep my wife here in the United States. She deserves to be here,” the man said to the President of The United States.

“It’s despicable what they’re doing right now. It’s very embarrassing,” the man said to CBS Miami.

Just going to skip the part qualifying the rank speculation and press on here: The fact that the man wasn’t arrested himself very strongly indicates that he’s an American citizen and was sponsoring his wife’s green card application. Based off that near certainty, the wording of the man’s pleas, specifically the use of “embarrassing,” make it a near 100 percent chance that he himself voted for Trump. Only one week into the “new golden age” and this dude’s mired in the bargaining stage, finding out that “family-oriented” means nothing and his choice has actual consequences.

“They say men have dirty minds, but women are flipping the script with their Valentine’s Day gifts from Manly Man Co, makers of unique gifts for men. After combing through hundreds of hilarious, cheeky, and downright naughty messages engraved on their iconic Meat Cards, a fully customizable greeting card made of beef jerky, a trend has emerged: women might just be outpacing men in the risqué creativity department. The Meat Card lets customers put their thoughts and feelings – whether sweet, spicy, or completely unfiltered – on display. And when the team behind the scenes took a closer look at the submissions, one thing became clear: women are going all in on the humor and innuendo,” says a press release from the Manly Man Company. Fuuuuuuuuuuck, lol.

“Here’s a Sample of What Women Had to Say: ‘Hope you enjoy my meat in your mouth as much as I enjoy yours in mine,’ ‘This meat isn’t the only thing that’s getting jerked tonight,’ ‘Your meat is rare and well done, just like you.’ ‘I’m tender for your beef, always,’ ‘My favorite thing to chew on is still your meat,'” the press release continues and holy fuck this is as apparently real as it is stupid.

“‘We’ve always known our Meat Cards are a hit with couples, but we didn’t expect this level of witty, dirty fun. It turns out, when you give women a blank slate and a slab of jerky, they’re not afraid to get hilariously bold,'” says “Manly Man Company” founder Greg Murray promoting his meat-based gift cards ahead of Valentine’s Day. Thomas Ligotti was unavailable for comment.

Trump Regime officials want to hit Canada and Mexico with 25 percent tariffs starting Saturday, before any talks even start, to make sure America’s neighbors know the Orange Tyrant “serious” about forcing whatever concessions he thinks he can get from them, the Wall Street Journal reports.

“He’s as serious as a heart attack” about fucking shit up, said Republican Senator Kevin Cramer.

A presidential inauguration, a dinosaur highway, a canine “supa cop”—the latest issue of TIME for Kids, in classrooms today, has it all. Dive in: https://t.co/xF1ARqVK75 pic.twitter.com/JiE9GySNhx

— TIME for Kids (@timeforkids) January 27, 2025

Citing sources familiar, the Washington Post reports that “US Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials have been directed by Trump officials to aggressively ramp up the number of people they arrest, from a few hundred per day to at least 1,200 to 1,500, because the president has been disappointed with the results of his mass deportation campaign so far, according to four people with knowledge of the briefings. The quotas were outlined Saturday in a call with senior ICE officials, who were told that each of the agency’s field offices should make 75 arrests per day and managers would be held accountable for missing those targets.” Copied that verbatim as to not mince words about how thing were going inside the MAGA Reich over the weekend, that the fat fuck is suddenly feeling pressure to meet his own unrealistic promises of a massive roundup of migrants.

That’ll end great. No need to worry about ICE agents feeling the pressure to meet an arbitrary goal and haphazardly arresting American citizens who merely “look” like they’re illegal. It will all go very smoothly and there definitely won’t be any public backlash from any such mistakes.

Asked to comment for the article, White House Press Secretary Karoline “Blondi” Leavitt told the Post simply “your story is false,” without further explanation. Weird how she wouldn’t want to enthusiastically inform MAGAmericans that the Reich is ramping up immigration enforcement arrests.

The leader of antelopes for lions Arab Americans for Trump tells the Times of Israel Mr President we supported you because Joe Biden and Kamala Harris couldn’t stop Netanyahu from massacring tens of thousands of innocent people so please don’t make us look even worse than we already do.

“We categorically reject the president’s suggestion that the Palestinians in Gaza be moved, apparently forcefully, to either Egypt or Jordan,” said the collaborator group’s chairman Bishara Bahbah after the Orange God Emperor suggested deporting all Gazans to those countries.

“What the Palestinians need right now is a continuation of the ceasefire, more aid, a reconstruction plan and for the Palestinian Authority to take over the Gaza Strip. We don’t need wildish claims or statements relating to the fate of the Palestinians. The only resolution to the Israel-Palestine question is a two-state solution. Period,” Bahbah continued, that last part just downright sad.

The Times of Israel then writes that they printed Bahbah’s quotes and then a few hours later updated the story after “Sam Yono, an Iraqi-American community activist asserted” to them that Bahbah “only represents himself, not the Arab-Americans who worked with the Trump campaign in Michigan.” Meaning that the chairman of the group literally called “Arab Americans for Trump” somehow represents the pro-Trump part of the Arab community less “authentically” than a freelancer does. Even better: Yono’s Facebook page makes it pretty obvious he’s a Christian as his banner is the symbol of the Assyrian Catholic community, thus not a Muslim. Even better-er: “Asked for his thoughts on Trump’s comments regarding Gaza, Yono acknowledged that he wasn’t particularly familiar with the issue but that he trusted the president’s judgement,” the Times writes.

Usually you only hear that from Republican members of Congress getting when they’re trying to avoid reporters, not from some surrogate assigned to “debunk” a story in an angry phone call.