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Lauren Boebert summoned to White House over Epstein petition

Full explainer on the situation: All 213 currently-serving House Democrats have signed onto rogue Kentucky Republican Congressman Thomas Massie’s discharge petition to force a vote to compel the Justice Department to release everything they have on Jeffrey Epstein. Four Republicans signed on: Massie, Crazy Nancy Mace, QAdulteress Marjorie Taylor Greene, and high school dropout Lauren Boebert, which makes 217. Arizona Dem Congresswoman-Elect Adelita Grijalva, who won a special election to succeed her late father Raul back in fucking September, will at 4PM be officially sworn in.

Within an hour she’ll sign the petition and it’ll be submitted to the clerk, Rubicon crossed. Then there’s no backing out from forcing every member of the House on the record of whether the Justice Department should release the Epstein files. Assuming every member who signed the discharge petition votes yes it will pass and then nothing will happen because the Senate won’t take it up. If they somehow do and it gets 60 votes then it still has to be signed into law by convicted felon President Trump, which it won’t be, requiring a veto-proof majority in both chambers.

Maybe don’t bet too much against that, who knows. Just having the vote at all will still be a massive coup for Democrats. Some schoolteacher in rural Missouri with a $13,000 war chest can campaign on saying incumbent Congressman Chester Roy McKlansman voted against releasing the Epstein files if they vote no, risk the wrath of the Orange God Emperor if they vote yes. Which makes it very important for the regime to stop this discharge petition from hitting 218 votes in less than five hours from now and the only way to do that is to put pressure on the four Republicans. Massie’s going to be a no since he literally fucking started the petition. Forget Greene. Mace earlier told CNN’s Manu Raju she’s not backing out but she’s gravely mentally ill and can’t be trusted by either side of this.

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“You see I know how dirty Donald is” wrote Epstein in 2018

The House Oversight Dems “cherrypicked” more emails sent and received by dead sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein on Wednesday, this exchange between Jeff and former Obama White House counsel Kathy Reummler on August 23, 2018 around the time now-former enforcer Michael Cohen pleaded guilty to federal charges related to the Stormy Daniels coverup. First Ruemmler emailed with: “Here’s a story from The New York Times that I thought you’d find interesting: The principled case for impeachment is clear. What’s missing is the courage,” linking to a Bret Stephens column apparently sent when you click on the “Share this story via email” button on the Times website.

“I think [Cohen] makes the argument that it was his, trumps money, making it not illegal. though he also said he only found out afterwards? and the fact according to the indictment was billed as services rendered and grossed up. im sure his [accountant] has flipped anyway. I did talk in detail to [Epstein’s former lawyer Ken] starr yesterday re indictments how trump can make a deal (special counsel). clintons trash can yes starr gave me more. YECHHHH!” Epstein wrote in reply.

“It makes no difference whether it was his money. Issue is failure to disclose. Plus, fact that he has lied his ass off about it makes clear that he knew it was illegal,” Reummler wrote.

“you see i know how dirty donald is. my guess is that non lawyers [New York] biz people have no idea. what it means to have your fixer flip,” Epstein wrote cryptically in the end of the exchange.

Well at least the MAGA kids get something out of this with Reummler evidently being all palsy with this sick fuck just four years after she left the White House on good terms with her boss.

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The Epstein emails were taken out of context, libtards

“The Democrats selectively leaked emails to the liberal media to create a fake narrative to smear President Trump. The ‘unnamed victim’ referenced in these emails is the late Virginia Giuffre, who repeatedly said President Trump was not involved in any wrongdoing whatsoever and ‘couldn’t have been friendlier’ to her in their limited interactions. The fact remains that President Trump kicked Jeffrey Epstein out of his club decades ago for being a creep to his female employees, including Giuffre. These stories are nothing more than bad-faith efforts to distract from President Trump’s historic accomplishments, and any American with common sense sees right through this hoax and clear distraction from the government opening back up again,” said White House Press Secretary Krazy Karoline in a statement Wednesday reacting to House Oversight Dems’ release of some pretty freaking damning emails indicating that convicted felon President Trump knew that his best bud was sex trafficking teenage girls. She’s taking the podium in just under two hours so this’ll be fun.

Meanwhile on CNN this morning MAGA Congressman Rob Stutzman lied and said that House Oversight Chairbilly James Comer “has done a very good job handling” the Epstein files shitshow “methodically.” If that were true then Slutzman would be doing a little victory dance to Wolf Blizter like he wanted to (and tried to) instead of being blindsided by these goddamned emails that Comer’s tormentor Ranking Dem Robert Garcia obtained. Comer has fucking sucked at this and if anything Republicans should be screaming at him to resign from the chair over his utter fecklessness in preventing these kinds of massively damaging releases they have to get asked about.

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Panamanians seize 13 tons of cocaine from non-exploded boat

Panamanian officials on Wednesday announced they had seized 13 tons of cocaine bound for the United States that was on a boat they had not exploded prior to the interdiction, CBS News reports.

“A total of 11,562 packages with suspected illegal substance were confiscated in diligence developed by the Drug Prosecutor’s Office with @aeronavalpanama, units to the southwest of San Jose Island, where 10 people of different nationalities were apprehended [rather than summarily executed by a munition fired from a Navy aircraft],” the canal country’s top prosecutor posted.

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Lady Bongo, Junior Bongo sentenced in absentia to 20 years

The Bongos – as in former Gabon First Lady Sylvia Bongo and her son Noureddin Bongo – got 20 years in the clink following their conviction on charges of concealment and embezzlement of public funds, money laundering, criminal association and forgery, which was a W for the Gabonese justice system but an L for the actual justice part since that’s almost certainly 20 years more than they’ll actually spend inside of a prison cell since they fled to the UK in 2023, the AP reports.

During the trial, prosecutors had released pics of two private jets bought with laundered money and listed land holdings including a mansion in London and Morocco. Patriarch and deposed ex-president Ali Bongo for some reason was permitted to leave the country too and now lives in Angola.

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House Dems acquire 2011 Epstein email putting Trump in his home

From an April 2, 2011 email dead pimp Jeffrey Epstein sent to accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell: “i want you to realize that that dog that hasn’t barked is trump.. [REDACTED VICTIM’S NAME] spent hours at my house with him, he has never once been mentioned. police chief. etc. im 75 percent there.”

Ghislaine’s reply a few hours later, marked “High importance”: “I have been thinking about that…”

This one’s been acquired by House Oversight Dems, per Politico’s Kyle Cheney, and while it’s hard to fill in the blanks on exactly what it might mean it is EXTREMELY unlikely that it’s anything that would make Trump look innocent. Not to mention it was the better part of a decade after he had supposedly unfriended Dirty Jeff over whatever the latest version of the story’s supposed to be.

Bad as that is, it gets possibly worse…

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Orange Yahweh commands Israeli president to pardon Netanyahu

Convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday sent a letter to Israeli President Isaac Herzog commanding him to pardon dictator Benjamin Netanyahu, who currently faces trial on charges of bribery, fraud and breach of trust, Bloomberg reports on a bold move to help make Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas presents more affordable for millions of Americans this holiday season.

“I hereby call on you to fully pardon Benjamin Netanyahu, who has been a formidable and decisive War Time Prime Minister, Netanyahu has stood tall for Israel in the face of strong adversaries and long odds, and his attention cannot be unnecessarily diverted,” Trump wrote in the letter and God knows how much Miriam Adelson kicked in to the ballroom to get him to send that bullshit.

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White House planning big Trump rally tour to fight inflation

President Trump’s team tell CNN they’re in the early stages of planning a lengthy series of MAGA rallies to address the affordability crisis that has been steadily growing source of concern for White House officials. “You can’t convince people that their experience, what they’re feeling at home, isn’t reality,” one source said about the domestic itinerary being launched to try to convince people that high prices are what the president repeatedly called a “con job” by the Democrats.

“The president gets it. He knows this is an issue,” a senior White House official said the same week that Trump called polls with his economic approval rating in the low 30 percent range “fake” during an interview. “But he’s frustrated he’s not getting credit for what he’s doing,” the official continued, naming energy deregulations and the extension of his 2017 tax cuts as major accomplishments that voters just need to learn more about so they can feel better about the economy and job market.

Once they see him talking about how he brought $25 trillion in deals in just nine months they will know they made the right choice last year. Trump previewed this argument during a speech to wealthy investors at a conference held in an air conditioned auditorium, saying “I tell Republicans, you want to win elections, you got to talk about these facts,” on his record of economic accomplishments. “You know, it’s really easy to win elections when you talk about the facts.”

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Hillary is so fucking screwed this time

“Attorney General Pam Bondi and FBI Director Kash Patel have produced to Congress a new cache of documents showing how Bill and Hillary Clinton’s foundation collected donations from foreign and domestic interests seeking influence – raising fresh concerns that such evidence was kept from federal prosecutors who tried to investigate pay-to-play allegations against the former first family a decade ago,” says the lede to a BLOCKBUSTER new report by crusading muckracker John Solomon.

Lol. There’s no real point in rehashing the why of all this stupid bullshit, the Trump Regime was always going to be resurrecting their old grievances for Solomon content this year, no matter what else happened. Worth pointing out however is that, right up front in that lede (but not in the typically clickbaity headline of “‘Clinton Corruption Files’: Bondi, Patel unleash new evidence about former first family foundation”) is the dismally sad what: The nation’s top two federal law enforcement officials gave this “new” evidence of alleged Clinton family corruption to Republicans in Congress.

Genericize that for a moment. “Gotham City District Attorney Paula Bundy and Police Chief Pat L Cash have produced to the City Council a cache of documents proving former Mayor Clint Bilton and his wife Harriet took multiple bribes from the Joker and the Penguin.” Does that sound like the DA and the cops are actually trying to put Clint and Harriet in Arkham Asylum anytime soon? Does the city council have any more investigative powers than law enforcement? Might one think that the actual point of the story is to encourage costumed vigilantes to attempt to bring them to justice?

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War on Bear Terrorism funds to be added to Japanese budget

Japanese Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi on Wednesday told Parliament that her government will soon “compile a package of measures soon and implement them using a supplementary budget,” to provide funds for local municipalities to mitigate the ongoing threat of bear attacks that, for reasons still unknown, have massively surged this year and left 12 dead, the Japan Times reports.

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British Columbia regulator determines 9 year-old should not have been operating carnival ride, though patron intoxication a factor too

An in-media-res clip from TechnicalSafetyBC’s Incident Summary #II-1919912-2025, a final determination on the investigation into a non-fatal injury incident at a carnival in Port Hardy, British Columbia on May 31st, 2025: “The two patrons were loaded into the PCU by two experienced operators and one younger attendant who was the child of the Foreman of the Zipper ride and had been helping and was described as ‘really good at cracking buckets.’ (An industry term for loading and unloading a caged style ride). The younger attendant had been trained in the specific procedures of loading and unloading the PCU but did not have the experience or assertiveness necessary to deal with situations that deviated from the normal routine. The Foreman had left the area for a brief time after repairing a component to wash up. The younger attendant, who travels with the carnival, was left around the Zipper ride where they were helping the loading and unloading of passengers, which they had done several times previously at different fair locations. Neither attendant was able to intervene or prevent loading of intoxicated passengers despite the posted rules and manufacturer and code requirements indicating intoxicated riders were not allowed.”

“The younger attendant later described the rider as ‘half asleep and half awake,'” lol. Meaning the kid was “qualified” to operate a “Zipper” but didn’t know how to identify drunk people.

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Senate GOP wants abortion restrictions added to ACA subsidies

As tempting as it is to say “Fucking Democrats” there wasn’t really any point in dragging the shutdown on much longer since Republicans have made it obvious that they don’t want to make healthcare more affordable for tens of millions of Americans. It was clear enough from Jesus Dork Speaker Mike Johnson and it should be even clearer now from the Senate GOP who NBC reports want to add all sorts of abortion-related restrictions on the vote to extend the ACA subsidies.

The shutdown ended stupidly and abruptly, Chuck Schumer’s a wuss, and so on and so forth. The legislative part of this was never going to wind up differently. Democrats can now campaign on having tried to prevent the massive increase in health insurance costs while Republicans can just ramble their contradictory bullshit about Obamacare being flawed from the start and that they have a new plan they’ll implement if you vote for them next year, just wait, you’ll love it…

Dems tried and failed to save Republicans from a cataclysm of their own making. Fin.

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Trump reposts meme calling Obama a Muslim Kenyan

Among several batshit stupid Truth Social posts shared by the 45th and 47th President of the United States on Tuesday was one by a user – whose avatar is apparently a Muppet version of himself – who wrote “Nothing about this asshole was ever real. I want every mention of him being president to have to feature an asterix [sic] leading to a footnote which says ‘contended’ or ‘awaiting legal verification’ or something” above a meme reading “A MAN USING A DIFFERENT NAME, SWORE ON A BIBLE HE DOESN’T BELIEVE IN AND BETRAYED A COUNTRY HE WASN’T BORN IN,” depicting the 44th President of the United States taking the oath of office at one of his two inaugurations.

It’s not clear if Keir Starmer ever posts the same sort of content about Rishi Sunak.

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Condemned inmate refuses to choose execution method

Tennessee death row inmate Harold Wayne Nichols on Monday declined to choose between the electric chair and lethal injection for his December 11th execution for the 1988 rape and murder of 21 year-old Chattanooga State University student Karen Pulley, the Associated Press reports.

The precise reason for Nichols’s refusal to participate in the penal system’s procedure that allowed him to select between the two methods offered was not made public, however it’s possible that it may be a personal objection to being executed, that selecting one of the options may have been seen as assent to having the punishment meted out for his crimes. Some may take the speculation even further and posit that a non-submittal of preference on his execution method could constitute an “opt-out” of the system, as though he were voting and simply left his ballot blank without selecting a candidate in a contested election, thus registering his protest over being presented with only bad choices. Since in that instance Nichols’s “vote” would be recorded but not counted, the same logic should apply to the execution method selection process: a null value has null effect.

It’s certainly a fascinating topic for legal scholars to ponder, not to mention Nichols himself, who will have 30 days to mull it over before he’s executed by lethal injection on December 11th, 2025.

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WATCH LIVE: Draft dodger honors those who fought in his stead

It appears the line “We fired thousands of people who didn’t take care of our great veterans. They were sadists, they were sick people, they were thieves, they were everything you want to name. When Biden came in he hired them back,” was actually written into Donald’s speech and not like an ad-lib. Just in case you want an idea of how it’s been going so far. “If we die, we must die and we as men we die without complaining,” was probably a Trump original, however.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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