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Bald fucking asshole MAGA Wisconsin Congressman Derrick Van Orden was none-too-pleased to be getting a LinkedIn message from Los Angeles-area former Veterans Affairs staffer Tony Ruiz.

“I am a member of Congress on the VA Committee. I have absolutely no say in the employment status of any individual in the executive branch however, I will be referring you to DOGE as it seems that at 13:46 on a Monday you should have been working for veterans, not posting trash about your boss, President Trump. There needs to be accountability. Now,” Van Orden wrote to Ruiz.

Thing is, per Wisconsin station WKOW’s JT Cestkowski Ruiz was let go on February 3rd, meaning it seems that Van Orden was threatening to get the already former employee fired. Cestkowski’s reporting isn’t 100 percent clear on the exact timing but either way that’s how Ruiz understood it, which means it’s contra to what the White House has been saying about DOGE’s firing powers.

Ruiz told Cestkowski that in a subsequent message he asked Van Orden to call him to testify publicly in front of the VA committee. The response he got: “See you at the VA Hearing, Pal.”

Woodstock, Illinois paper straw factory owner Guy Spinelli is a little glum lately, telling the Washington Post that everything was going great for his business until convicted felon President Trump – who Spinelli voted for – signed that executive order banning purchases of the straws by federal government agencies. Even though Spinelli does no business whatsoever with the government, and obviously paper straws are by no means banned for use by private enterprise, his buyers are for whatever reason moving back to plastic. The 75 year-old former paper mill laborer expects to do a tenth of the $800,000 in business he did in 2024, all this after investing over $2 million from his life’s savings into developing the straw and launching the company in 2023.

“Our distributors are saying, ‘Everyone’s going back to plastic now because of the president. The president I voted for, the man who says ‘Let’s make America great again, let’s help small businesses grow,’ that man is going to put me out of business,” Spinelli said, adding “Why doesn’t the president reach out to some of us manufacturers and say, ‘Hey, what’s going on with this straw business?’ I drink the same beverage he does – Diet Coke – and my straw lasts all day long,” as if Trump cares.

Perhaps the cruelest part is that in 2023 none other than Fox News douchebag Jesse Watters gave Spinelli’s brand “Boss Straw” high marks for staying intact in a cup of water for 24 hours.

Secretary of State Marco Rubio was pretty offended by Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s Kyiv-gyonistic and anti-Muscovite attitude during the Oval Office meeting on Friday, accusing Zelensky of “Ukraine-splaining” the situation on the ground to the president and vice president.

Kansas Senator Roger Marshall ran like a bitch from a Saturday town hall at a hospital in the state’s rural western reaches, saying “We don’t have time for everyone to stand up. I do got two more commitments today. I appreciate everybody making the drive out and God bless America,” as he fled from the room, the Lawrence Times reports on yet another act of cowardice.

Western Kansan Rodney Bates complained that too many people from the bluer eastern part of the state had come to the event. “I came because I wanted to see what was affecting nursing homes right now,” Bates told the Times. “Rural hospitals are hurting but all people wanted to do was scream at the senator.” He wasn’t wrong, at least one person, Anne Parelkar, from Overland Park did in fact tell the paper she had traveled to Oakley to confront Marshall to question him about the efficiencies of cutting government workers, to which Marshall told her she’d been fed disinformation.

But the first problem with Bates’s complaint is that Marshall is a Senator. This isn’t like if libs from Atlanta had rushed Marjorie Taylor Greene’s event. Every Kansan is a constituent and, to that point, it’s no fucking mystery why he held the town hall in a rural hospital cafeteria that the Times says seats 20 people. The second problem is that at least one local, Chuck Nunn, had in fact stood up and called Marshall out, saying federal job cuts affecting veterans were “a damn shame.”

Another man, probably a local, then said “I’m not a Democrat, but I’m worried about the veterans.”

“A new bill would give President Trump a THIRD TERM. We need to hear from you. Are YOU ready to give President Trump a THIRD TERM to truly MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN? Do YOU want to see President Trump get a THIRD TERM?” asks another ridiculous WinRed page sent out this week, this one with the fake, meaningless poll a means of raising cash for the House Conservatives Fund PAC.

The Huffington Post, who found the page from a fundraising text sent out to donors, reports that this specific PAC is tied to the House Republican Study Committee, member-formed caucus that was kind of the Freedom Caucasians before some members decided there RSC was too moderate for their far right extremist proclivities and started the Freedom Caucasians. There’s plenty of overlap between the two groups (it’s estimated that at least 17 House Republicans are members of both). It would seem however that organizationally the RSC might’ve beaten the Caucasians to monetizing dual member MAGA Congressman Andy Ogles’s bill to get the DOJ to drop the federal criminal investigation into him over a campaign fundraising scam proposing an amendment to the constitution allowing convicted felon President Trump to run for a third term in 2028.

A FedEx cargo plane bound for Indianapolis quickly turned around and landed back at Newark International Airport in New Jersey on Saturday morning, minus one engine and at least one local bird minus its life after the hapless beast(s) got sucked into the jet intake, WNBC reports.

Video taken by witnesses shows the flames were quickly extinguished before the plane even touched back down, evidently the result of quick thinking by the pilot who closed off the air intake to the engine or something. The plane, its cargo – which may or may not have included one or more Wilson brand volleyballs and a pair of figure skates – and most importantly its crew then touched down safely. It’s not clear if the pilot was “a DEI hire,” and it probably never will be.

Unless the pilot is Black and/or LGBTQ and ignored warnings about bird activity in the area or something like that. Then it’ll be all over right wing media in a matter of hours.

The trail to Oregon is marked with misery, broken wagon axles, losing days due to heavy fog, Sarah getting shot in a hunting accident, Henry being exhausted, Samuel getting bitten by a snake, and, most famously, Mary contracting dysentery. What the game didn’t tell you however is the harsh reality of this Gateway Pundit article, largely copy-pasted from its upstream source at KOIN:

There’s dysentery in Oregon too. Cases of the horrible bacterial illness recorded by health officials have steadily increased in the Portland metro’s Multnomah County since June 2024 when there were only six to 45 in January 2025. On an annual basis, there were just 19 in 2017, rising to 158 in 2024, a spread mostly connected to the homeless population and drug use as 60 percent of those infected were said to be living on the streets. Noting this, the Gateway Pundit’s article asserts “It doesn’t have to be this way and it’s amazing that the taxpayers of Portland put up with it. There are Third World countries that do a better job preventing the spread of common diseases.”

Funny that, as since January 1st, 2025, the Pundit has printed a grand total of one article containing the word “measles”: a February 19th screed headlined “MIC DROP: Dr Paul Offit’s Attempt to Smear RFK Jr Blows Up on CNN as Calley Means Exposes His Big Pharma Ties – Calley Also Calls Out CNN for Bias.” The article is almost entirely blockquotes copy-pasted from the transcript of the CNN segment and the lone mention of measles outside of which is where the “Pundit,” Jim Hoft fondles himself over how Means “boldly called out CNN for its blatant bias, pointing out that while the network obsesses over a handful of measles cases, it ignores the true epidemic plaguing America: chronic disease fueled by ultra-processed food and overmedication.” Except for lib dysentery.

Damien Chazelle’s 2018 Neil Armstrong biopic First Man is pretty goddamned good. Okay, one could argue reasonably that not enough time is devoted to Apollo 11 because the director wanted to make it more “austere” or whatever. Or that Armstrong was “so much more than Apollo 11.” Who knows.

Whatever the point was in that decision it does not make the film any less worth watching. It can get fucking intense, especially the opener when Neil’s out on some extremely high altitude test flight in 1961. That shit with the bottom of his cockpit glowing red from the friction of the atmosphere. And then the gut-wrenching tragedy of his toddler daughter Karen’s death to cancer and the Apollo 1 test launch disater – The minimalism is freaking chilling and it’s so much better done than its (brief) depiction in Ron Howard’s Apollo 13 – which First Man is not a “spiritual prequel” to.

UPDATE 3/1/2025 12:01 AM: They movie became unavailable on YouTube at EXACTLY midnight, lol.

Naomi Dobbs, district southwest region director for Republican Congressman Jeff Hurd, took one look at the crowd that had showed up to the Monday night League of Women voters event at the public library in the town of Dolores, and turned right the fuck around, Montezuma County League chapter president Karen Sheek tells the Durango Herald, seeking to clarify what happened.

“I don’t want people thinking she didn’t come, when in fact she did,” said Sheek, adding that Dobbs did come, but left after seeing the size of crowd that had shown up. Montezuma County Sheriff Steve Nowlin, who had escorted Dobbs to and from the event, said that the Republican minion was uncomfortable being there after a “misunderstanding about what the size of that meeting was like.”

Sheek said Dobbs had since sent her a “vague” email explaining that “under the circumstances,” she decided to turn around but would be open to something else in the future. Now this is a pretty common practice for local staffers to fill in for members at public events, so it’s not like this was Hurd being a pussy and sending a woman to do his job instead. it was simply Dobbs being a fucking coward and not wanting to face the wrath of voters furious over the fascist Trump Regime.

On his way out of the White House on his way to a weekend down in Mar-a-Lago, convicted felon President Trump was asked Friday what Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky can do to restart peace talks after this afternoon’s shitshow in the Oval Office. His answer, per Fwrd Axis’s Steve Michael, was “He’s got to want to make peace. He doesn’t have to say negative things about Putin.”

Any Trump fans want to step up with that one? Should Benjamin Netanyahu avoid saying negative things about Hamas or Hezbollah? Why was Trump offended on Putin’s behalf? Any takers here?

The US Mint at some point recently removed a commemorative coin struck to honor the cops assaulted and injured when convicted felon President Trump sent his scumbag fans to attack the Capitol on January 6th, 2021, NBC News reports on a new low mark in cuntish pettiness.

Foreign adversaries like Russia and China are stepping up efforts to turn federal employees who have been fired or fear they will be soon into intelligence assets, focusing mostly on those who have or did have security clearances to pass them along info in exchange for cash, CNN reports.

A source familiar says the ChiComs and Russians think the employees “are at their most vulnerable right now… Out of a job, bitter about being fired, etc.” Another said “It doesn’t take a lot of imagination to see that these cast aside federal workers with a wealth of institutional knowledge represent staggeringly attractive targets to the intelligence services of our adversaries.”

The insolent pig finally got a proper slap down in the Oval Office. And @realDonaldTrump is right: The Kiev regime is "gambling with WWIII."

— Dmitry Medvedev (@MedvedevRussiaE) February 28, 2025

“A Statement from President Donald J Trump: We had a very meaningful meeting in the White House today. Much was learned that could never be understood without conversation under such fire and pressure. It’s amazing what comes out through emotion, and I have determined that President Zelenskyy is not ready for Peace if America is involved, because he feels our involvement gives him a big advantage in negotiations. I don’t want advantage, I want PEACE. He disrespected the United States of America in its cherished Oval Office. He can come back when he is ready for Peace,” says a statement posted to the fat fuck’s Truth Social account after that “disrespect” from a real leader.

You can tell this was a compromise between Trump and his handlers. One he actually wrote would’ve been in all caps and maybe even threatening to bomb Ukraine or ordering Zelensky arrested by the FBI before he can leave DC. The L’etat c’est moi shit was as far as they’d let him go.

The traditional joint press conference was canceled, per CNN’s Kaitlan Collins.

The Democratic National Committee, the DCCC, and the DSCC filed a lawsuit against convicted felon President Trump and Attorney General Pam Bondi’s regime seeking a judge to enjoin Trump’s Executive Order 14215 which “commands the [FEC] Commissioners and the Commission’s employees to treat Defendant Trump’s and Defendant Bondi’s ‘interpretations of law,’ including of FECA, as ‘authoritative’ and ‘controlling on [the Commissioners and the Commission’s employes] in the conduct of their official duties,’ and prohibits the Commissioners and the Commission’s employees from ‘advanc[ing] any interpretation of the law as the position of the United States that contravenes the President or the Attorney General’s opinion on a matter of law,” in the relief.

More plainly, Dems want Trump the fuck out of the FEC and warn that if he doesn’t back off Republicans will live to regret it the next time a Dem is in the White House.

Following up on how Nazi Tom Homan’s moronic threats against her are going, Dem Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez on Friday sent a letter to Attorney General Pam Bondi seeking “clarity on whether the Department of Justice has yielded to political pressure and attempts to weaponize the agency against elected officials whose speech they disagree with. Over the past two weeks, ‘Border Czar’ Tom Homan has gone on multiple forums threatening political prosecution against me, citing resources I distributed informing my constituents and the American public of their constitutional and legal rights. On February 13, 2025, Mr Homan announced that he had asked the Deputy Attorney General to open an investigation, and that I will be ‘in trouble now.'”

“It has been 14 days since Mr Homan first threatened to weaponize your agency, but I have not yet heard any referral from the government. Mr Homan’s repeated attempts to use your agency to politically intimidate duly elected officials are a textbook threat to the right to free speech in the United States. Threatening criminal proceedings for exercising the First Amendment is itself a violation of the First Amendment. Educating the public about their rights, especially in a time of rising uncertainty, is a key part of our responsibility as elected officials. A government that uses threats of investigations to suppress free speech is a threat to all, regardless of political ideology.”

“Please respond no later than March 5, 2025, with an update on the Department of Justice’s response to Mr Homan’s request and transparency as to whether my office or myself is actively under investigation for exercising their First Amendment rights and executing on our congressional responsibilities,” AOC concluded, with that last “demand” a pretty shrewd move politically.

Bumping this up to the top because it’s getting extremely heated in the Oval Office as convicted felon President Trump and his top Putin fanboy Jaydee embarrass the United States on the world stage.

The Texas regime lead by the unholy triumvirate of Gov Low Energy Greg Abbott, Lt Gov Dannie Goeb aka “Dan Patrick,” and Picasso-faced Attorney General Ken Paxton have been complete silent on the outbreak of measles in the state’s western portions, the Texas Tribune reports, whom haven’t seen a single post or statement from the three Republican scumbags on the matter, nor from any of the local, state, or federal legislators representing the districts hit by the disease.

“Everybody is so sensitive to the vaccine topic due to COVID,” said Ector County executive Dustin Fawcett. “We need to be very careful about how we address this topic… Our job is to provide the resources, not to tell people what they need to do.” Like getting their kids vaccinated.

The globalist regime currently driving America into the ground plans to issue an official edict declaring a foreign language the “official” one of the United States, CBS’s Weijia Jiang reports.

“English,” which did not originate in America but instead in a distant land during an era in which men wore frilly stockings everywhere they went and had really gay-looking facial hair too, will be enshrined as the official language here by President Donald Trump’s executive fiat as soon as Friday.

To shift the satirical tone here, the question now raised is why the fuck he won’t just declare the language is now to be called “American” on the basis that the United States has more native English speakers than any other one country, as well as simply stealing credit from the British. It’s not MAGA enough simply to proclaim it the official language which, to completely do away with the satirical tone, this order means fuck all and sure as shit won’t make eggs cheaper or lower credit card rates.

The headline’s been edited from its source to fit the space allowed here at National Zero. The actual sentence copied from this Washington Post profile of 24 year-old Michigander and now-former National Park Service ranger Ryleigh Cooper was “She also believed him when he said that Project 2025, the conservative blueprint for the next Republican administration that suggested mass cuts to the federal workforce, was not his plan,” in explaining some of the reasons why the 2020 Biden voter switched to the Orange God Emperor despite hating him personally his history of sexual assaults, which the Post notes that Cooper’s relatives dismiss as either fake or that the women deserved it.

The next sentence “So Cooper filled in the bubble next to his name, thinking of the daughter she wanted. She planned to name her Charlotte,” refers to how the now-unemployed woman who just finished her first semester toward a master’s degree in forest management also believed that Trump would make IVF treatments free to any and every woman having difficulty conceiving – like her.

Oh and Cooper says she was sexually assaulted at age 16. But “life felt more complicated these days. Her mortgage was too expensive, groceries were nearly $400 a month, and one single cycle of IVF could cost more than 10 percent of her annual household income.” And “Kamala Harris didn’t do an interview on Joe Rogan’s podcast,” the article does not add but might as well have.

A few days after Elon Musk fired her, Cooper saw the executive order on IVF treatments, which quite predictably did not make them free for American families. “That’s bullshit”, Cooper said to herself.