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Trump lawyer lawyers up

Scumbag Trump lawyer Evan Corcoran, facing possible criminal liability for false statements to the Justice Department and an effort by special counsel Jack Smith to force him to testify under a crime-fraud exception to attorney-client privilege, has himself lawyered up, Reuters reports on that lame old “Making Attorneys Get Attorneys” backronym for MAGA coming true once again.

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Marty Walsh resigning as Labor Secretary to run NHL Union

Secretary of Labor Marty Walsh will be the first Cabinet Secretary of the Biden Administration to resign after taking a job to be the head of the National Hockey League’s player’s union, NBC News reports.

The 55-year-old former mayor of Boston will go back to his union roots:  he led the Boston Building Trades union prior to entering politics.  He’s scheduled to leave his job in mid-March to become the executive director of the NHL Players’ Association.

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‘How weak ratings make good journalists do bad things’

Interesting things happen around the National Zero virtual office, and they come full circle some days.  Today was one of those days.  This morning, Spartan virtually sauntered into my virtual corner office in the virtual National Zero office tower in Brooklyn, puts his feet up on my desk–a habit I find SO annoying because lord knows where those flip flops have been!–and asks a question about journalistic ethics:  “Would it be fair to say John Solomon is criminally implicated if he sourced articles from classified documents?”

He had picked up the story on Solomon using classified information in his stories, and it started a conversation we frequently have on things we’re writing to make sure neither of us is going over a journalistic or ethical line.  (Because believe it or not, National Zero holds itself to higher professional, moral and ethical standards than Fox News, those motherfuckers.  NatZero:  More swearing.  Less sexual harassment.) The questions I had came from confusion about Solomon’s role:  was he acting as an advisor or a journalist?  When did he have access to the classified information and when did he report it?  Was he “read into” the info, or was the info declassified?  The roles Solomon played determined whether criminal charges would apply.  (Ultimately, it appears Solomon can make a reasonable legal claim that he understood the information had been declassified by the President-at-the-time when he received it and that he received it in his capacity as a journalist, making it plausibly coverable by press shield laws.)

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Fox News hosts talked a lot of shit about Trump allies in text messages obtained by Dominion in lawsuit discovery

Fox News hosts and staff talked a lot of shit about fat now-former President Trump and his minions during and their ultimately futile attempts to overturn Donald’s humiliating loss to Joe Biden in the aftermath of the 2020 election, according to text messages obtained in discovery by Dominion Voting Systems’ lawyers as part of their lawsuit against the network, the New York Times reports.

“Sidney Powell is lying by the way. I caught her. It’s insane,” Tucker Carlson wrote to Laura Ingraham after a train wreck of an interview with the Kraken on November 18th, 2020. “Sidney is a complete nut. No one will work with her. Ditto with Rudy,” Frau Ingraham replied to Tucker.

Yet Tucker also wanted the “real news” side of Fox to shut up and wrote to Ingraham and Hannity that a reporter needed to be punished for fact checking a Trump tweet about Dominion. “Please get her fired. It needs to stop immediately, like tonight. It’s measurably hurting the company. The stock price is down. Not a joke,” Tucker wrote on November 9th, 2020. The texts were included in a motion for summary judgement filed by Dominion on last month, moving in for the kill against Fox News with evidence such as these texts to argue that their case has already been proven without need for a trial.

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Carlson spins Whitmer’s appeal to end gun violence into claim Democrats banned people from praying

This really is a fascinating example of how Tucker Carlson can lie directly to his viewers… and they believe it.  The clip opens with Democratic Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer saying in the state of the state speech that “thoughts and prayers are not enough” in the fight against gun violence.  Within 60 seconds, Carlson has turned a plea for action against a weapon of mass violence into an all-out assault against prayer by Democrats.  And he did after showing the video of Whitmer not saying what he claims she said.  His viewers will believe him over what they just saw.

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Kari Lake loses rigged appeal of election lawsuit

A rigged panel of pro-Dominion Voting Systems judges on Thursday rejected Republican legitimate Governor of Arizona Kari Lake’s appeal of the rigged rejection of her lawsuit contesting the outcome of the rigged gubernatorial election which she won but was stolen because it was rigged.

“Kari Lake appeals the [rigged] Maricopa County [socialist] Superior Court’s [fraudulent] ruling [improperly] rejecting her [totally legitimate, totally perfect] request to set aside [libtard] Katie Hobbs’s 17,117 [fake] vote win [actually lost] in Arizona’s 2022 [stolen] gubernatorial election. Lake’s [patriotic, America First] arguments highlight [rigged] election day difficulties, but her [irrefutable] request for relief fails because the [overwhelming] evidence presented to the [woke leftist] superior court ultimately supports the court’s conclusion that [Chinese Communist] voters were able to cast their [bamboo] ballots, that votes were counted correctly [the algorithms], and that no other basis [based] justifies setting aside the [third world] election results. Accordingly, we affirm,” the rigged three judge appeals court panel wrote in the opinion, which we annotated to make more patriotic.

Also, what’s with the “17,117 vote win”? Q is the 17th letter of the alphabet! Soros probably left a coded “fuck you” to patriots in that rigged number! It just shows how biased these so-called “judges” are that they can’t see the obvious symbolism in the evidence right in front of them!

National Zero will resume our regular coverage now that we’ve feigned sympathy for the ceaseless rage and paranoia burdening our MAGA readers. We hope they enjoyed this “rigged” news report.

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Surprise! Yet another House GOP freshman a fucking fraud

Following the footsteps of his colleagues George Santos and Anna Paulina Luna, freshman Tennessee Republican Congressman Andy Ogles has been exposed as a total fucking fraud in an in-depth report by Nashville CBS affiliate WTVF detailing Ogles’ volumnuous resume fabrications.

First there’s his claim to be an “economist.” Ogles got a bachelor’s in international relations, with minors in psychology and English from Middle Tennessee State University – in 2007, at age 36 – which isn’t economics. His website says he got the degree in “policy and economics.” Then there’s his claim to be “a former member of law enforcement, worked in international sex crimes, specifically child trafficking,” when in reality he was an unpaid volunteer Williams County, Tennessee deputy reserve sheriff for two years before being fired for not showing up for required training. “There is nothing in Mr. Ogles training or personnel file that indicates he had any involvement in ‘international sex trafficking’ in his capacity as a reserve deputy,” a Williams Sheriff’s Office spokesperson said.

Ogles’ experience with fighting sex trafficking amounts to a part-time position with a charity called Abolition International founded by some gospel singer with helps sex trafficking victims. Ogles was paid a grand total of $4,000 for his work in 2011 with the group, which wasn’t the kind of operation that exposes and takes down international sex trafficking rings. People associated with the group didn’t want to get into it with Ogles, except to say that calling himself the chief operating officer was a gross exaggeration at best. So yeah, here’s yet another fine upstanding citizen in the House GOP.

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Capitol rioter who violated attempted murder bond to go to DC on January 6, 2021 pleads guilty to assaulting cops during insurrection

We can’t really call certain Capitol rioters our “favorites” as that would imply we actually like them. We don’t. They’re all shit both in their politics and by and large in their personal lives. But some of their cases we gave more attention to than others in our coverage for one reason or another.

Matthew Beddingfield of North Carolina is one of them and we’re almost sad to see him go, as his Thursday guilty plea on a single count of felony assault for attacking cops – for which he faces at least eight years – during the insurrection is the penultimate chapter in Beddingfield’s debased saga.

In 2019 at age 17, Beddingfield was charged with attempted murder after shooting another teenager in the head in Walmart parking lot during a dispute over an unspecified matter which we would feel comfortable betting was drugs because what the hell else would they be doing in a Walmart parking lot. The other teen apparently survived and it was probably a graze wound given that Beddingfield’s bond, initially set at $1 million, was bumped down to $100,000, and he was allowed to plead down to an unspecified lesser charge in August 2021. This of course was seven months after the MAGA insurrection, at which Beddingfield was caught on video outside the Capitol assaulting police, and then identified by Huffington Post reporters just three months later. For whatever reason this never came to the attention of the court in North Carolina prior to Beddingfield’s conviction for which he was only sentenced to probation. It took until February 2022 for the FBI to catch up to him.

Beddingfield laid low enough under pretrial conditions, except for that one Saturday night outing at Buffalo Wild Wings with his mom back last May. But as he faces sentencing on June 22nd, this period of relative peace will prove fleeting for him, as will our interest in covering the hard fist of the American federal justice system breaking his little fucking Nazi derelict jaw.

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Main Justice takes control of investigation into Texas AG Paxton

Justice Department officials in DC have taken control of the corruption investigation into piece of shit Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, removing it from the hands of Texas-based federal prosecutors and potentially signaling a major escalation of the long and sordid saga separate from his longer and sordid saga of avoiding trial on state-level securities charges, the AP reports.

It’s not clear exactly what prompted the move, other than that it immediately followed a recusal by the San Antonio-based US Attorney’s office just days after Paxton settled a lawsuit brought the four former deputies who he fired in 2020 in retaliation for reporting him to the FBI for his scumbaggery and extramarital affair with an employee of one of his donors. With the probe now in the hands of the Justice Department’s Public Integrity Division, things could (hopefully) finally get moving.

In related news, Paxton on Wednesday sued President Joe Biden for signing the $1.7 trillion omnibus funding package into law in December for some fucking stupid made-up reason.

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Like with other things, Trump probably a little premature on this

In an earlier post, Trump wrote “The long awaited important sections of the Georgia report, which do not even mention President Trump’s name, have nothing to do with the President because President Trump did absolutely nothing wrong. The President participated in two perfect phone calls regarding election integrity in Georgia, which he is entitled to do – in fact, as President, it was President Trump’s Constitutional duty to ensure election safety, security, and integrity…” then continuing in another post with “Between the two calls, there were many officials and attorneys on the line, including the Secretary of State of Georgia, and no one objected, even slightly protested, or hung up. President Trump will always keep fighting for true and honest elections in America!”

Should work out just fine for him, with no need to amend this statement in the future.

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John Solomon sourced articles from Trump classified docs: report

Sucktacular fake news propagandist John Solomon has been pulled deeper into his Holy Orange Messiah’s criminal schemes as independent journalist Murray Waas reports that Trump may have given classified intel related to the Russia investigation to Solomon in the final days of his term.

Shortest possible version: Solomon was in the White House during the final weeks of Trump’s single-term, trying to help Donald figure out which documents to declassify to “prove” his innocence in the Russia scandal – something Jack Smith is looking at as a possible criminal motive for stealing other materials and holding them hostage. Trump’s last-minute declassification effort failed, but according to Waas, Solomon published at least two stories on his website around the same time, “exclusives” based on information that could have only come from said documents. It’s unlikely Solomon could be criminally implicated given shield laws that protect journalists – even shitty ones with an agenda – from prosecution for reporting sensitive information. The same can’t be said for Trump as this reporting, if accurate, would serve as further evidence of his Russia scandal-related intent.

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FBI search of Biden docs at University of Delaware comes up empty

The recent FBI search of documents housed at the University of Delaware dating from President Joe Biden’s Senate career found initially nothing marked as classified, but agents took some materials for further review to make a determination on their sensitivity, the Washington Post reports.

Now of course a future search of some other premises could turn up additional classified documents or damning details about what their contents were could always leak at some point. No one should discount that possibility. Barring that however, it’s hard to see how much more mileage the MAGA chodes are going to get out of Joe’s fuckup as far as being able to say “Look! Biden did the same thing Trump did!” especially with newer reporting on shit like a Trump aide storing classified info on a laptop that was likely unsecured while connected to the internet and that Jack Smith is seeking to force Trump’s lawyer to testify under a crime-fraud exception to attorney client privilege.

Worse yet for the fanboys is that it’s been nearly six weeks since the first report on the discovery of classified material dating to his time as Vice President and we still know nothing about the contents. It took all of two days after the Mar-a-Lago raid for it to leak that Trump had been purposely hanging onto top secret nuclear intel. Assume that whatever source leaked the nuclear detail to the Washington Post about Trump did so to damage him politically and that whatever source leaked to CBS News about the Biden docs fuckup wanted to do the same to Joe. Why didn’t that source add any details about what Biden had that he wasn’t supposed to? Is it because if it was elaborated upon then people might start asking “Well why the fuck was that still even classified in the first place? Who cares which floor of a hotel in Paris Biden stayed on in 2011?” That might kind of further desensationalize something that was already “bad optics” at its most maximal media hype.

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Luciferase Lady lands huge scoop

Call us uptight if we’re a little skeptical of this report from a former B-movie actress who managed to get herself fired from fucking Newsmax after she tweeted that the COVID-19 vaccines contain “Luciferase” (a real but harmless class of bioluminescent enzymes found in nature, not in any kind of vaccines) and then went to work for Mike Lindell’s propaganda channel. We just need to see some more information, preferably from other sources, before we make a determination about the reliability of this report. In lieu of that we’ll simply question why she didn’t just fucking say it was aliens. She’s already a good 90 percent of the way there with this “exotic vehicle” shit.

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Fulton County judge releases sections of Trump grand jury report

Fulton County, Georgia Judge Robert McBurney on Thursday publicly released brief sections of a report on the special purpose grand jury investigation into fat former President Trump and his minions’ failed attempt to overturn the result of the 2020 election in the state. There’s not much to it, indicating that the full report is viewed as a charging document by Fulton DA Fani Willis’s office.

“A majority of the Grand Jury believes that perjury may have been committed by one or more witnesses testifying before it. The Grand Jury recommends that the District Attorney appropriate indictments for such crimes where the evidence is compelling,” the report says which, well no shit, they’re Trump minions of course they fucking lied under oath. The report also says the grand jury found “by a unanimous vote that no widespread fraud took place in the Georgia 2020 presidential election that could result in overturning that election.” Also no shit about that one.

Again, that there’s almost nothing in there is a good thing. This means the grand jury recommended that people be hit with criminal charges beyond the incidental perjury. If they had concluded that the conduct by Trump and his minions was improper but not criminal you would see it in this report.

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Proud Boys lawyer tells court they’ll subpoena Trump

An attorney defending the leadership of the Proud Boys in their trial on charges of seditious conspiracy on Thursday told the court they will move to subpoena fat former President Trump to testify on the stand about the lead-up to the Capitol riot, Politico’s Kyle Cheney reports.

“We’re going to ask the government for assistance in serving Mr Trump,” Norman Pattis, attorney for Proud Boys captain Joseph Biggs, told DC Circuit Judge Timothy Kelly just minutes ago. It’s not clear how sincerely the Proud Boys actually want Donald to testify, or if it’s merely an effort to hold the trial up. Kelly’s reaction should say a lot about the move, so stay tuned.

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John Eastman asks for delay in facing bar misconduct charges over Trump coup attempt so he doesn’t have to plead the Fifth

Scumbag MAGA lawyer John Eastman on Wednesday filed a lengthy response to the California Bar Association’s misconduct charges against him, defending his actions to try to overturn the results of the 2020 election as proper practice but at the end requesting that the proceedings be delayed until he’s no longer under federal criminal investigation so he doesn’t have to plead the Fifth.

“To the extent Respondent is under threat of criminal prosecution, implicating his Fifth Amendment rights, abatement of the disciplinary proceeding is arguably necessary to protect his rights and is within the Bar Court’s discretion to order,” Eastman wrote, raising the interesting pickle that he’s in, defending his license to practice law after having had his phone seized by the FBI executing a search warrant and been exposed as having requested a presidential pardon (which he didn’t get).

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Nimrata says Trump did great on his mental competency test without elaborating on which mental competency test he took

Citing Nimrata “Nikki” Haley’s campaign launch speech call for mandatory mental competency tests for all federal politicians over age 75, Fox and Friends host Brian Kilmeade on Thursday asked the former South Carolina governor how she thought 76 year-old disgraced former President Trump would do on such a test, to which Haley said Trump “did great the last time he did it.”

Haley didn’t go any further on Trump, predictably making it about President Joe Biden, so it’s not clear what competency test that Trump took she’s referring to, and it almost certainly can’t be anything other than the infamous “Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV,” bit from that Fox News interview back in 2020. Which was, uh, not really something that should be held up as an argument that Donald is now or ever was mentally stable enough to hold the most powerful office in the world.

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