“I believe that China purposefully not buying our Soybeans, and causing difficulty for our Soybean Farmers, is an Economically Hostile Act. We are considering terminating business with China having to do with Cooking Oil, and other elements of Trade, as retribution. As an example, we can easily produce Cooking Oil ourselves, we don’t need to purchase it from China,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday and holy shit he’s going to destroy America’s fried food industry.

Sure is colorful, right? Politico reports they’ve obtained a Telegram chat between Young Republicans’ leaders named Pete Giunta, Bobby Walker, Anne KayKaty, Joe Maligno, Rachel Hope, Alex Dwyer. The “Everyone that votes no is going to the gas chamber,” is the then-New York State chair Guinta’s warning to those who do not support his bid to become national chair of the 15,000-strong GOP group for MAGAs aged 18 to 40. “Since Politico began making inquiries, one member of the group chat is no longer employed at their job and another’s job offer was rescinded. Prominent New York Republicans, including Rep. Elise Stefanik and state Senate Minority Leader Rob Ortt, have denounced the chat. And festering resentments among Young Republicans have now turned into public recriminations, including allegations of character assassination and extortion,” Politico writes.

“Since the beginning of the 118th Congress, the Committee has conducted oversight of the operations of the Office of Special Counsel you led – specifically, your team’s partisan and politically motivated prosecutions of President Donald J Trump and his co-defendants. Among the disturbing tactics employed in that prosecution, your team sought to silence President Trump by restricting his public statements about the case, conducted an unnecessary and abusive raid of his residence, attempted to improperly pressure defense counsel with the promise of political patronage, and manipulated key evidence in the investigation. These actions undermined the integrity of the criminal justice system and violated the core responsibility of federal prosecutors to do justice. As the Committee continues its oversight, your testimony is necessary to understand the full extent to which the Biden-Harris Justice Department weaponized federal law enforcement” writes spandex-wearing grapple freak Jim Jordan in the intro to his subpoena of former special counsel Jack Smith.

Most of the rest of it is just bitching about how other guys on Smith’s team pleaded the fifth.

“For more than 30 years, Habitat for Humanity International and Wells Fargo have worked together to increase housing affordability and helping to build more prosperous communities around the world. Today, Wells Fargo is donating $4.6 million through the 2025 Wells Fargo Builds program to support new home construction, renovation and repair to benefit more than 200 families in more than 130 communities across the US,” says the very large American bank in a press release.

“Wells Fargo Builds, a collaboration between the Wells Fargo Foundation and Habitat, provides philanthropic financial support for the construction, renovation and repair of homes with low-to-moderate income households. Wells Fargo Foundation’s funding also helps Habitat build systems that advance housing equity for all people and address policies that have prevented access to safe and affordable housing. Since 2020, Habitat has recorded that more than 8,400 Wells Fargo employees have contributed 45,000 volunteer hours. Through their combined efforts, Habitat and Wells Fargo have been able to serve nearly 1,900 families and positively impact the lives of 6,000 individuals,” the beaming press release continued and damn. Really not sure what to add here.

Like they had to include those numbers of “positively impacted lives”? AND their charitable endeavor is to put roofs over the heads of the unfortunate? Not for nothing but it just miiiiiiight have been a little more prudent to donate to pediatric cancer patients or whatever other cause that’s far enough afield from their industry that no eyebrows get raised. That way nobody’s tempted do the math already assuming “Okay so Wells Fargo, through their partnership with Habitat for Humanity, helped house X number of families down on their luck which offsets Y fraction of a percent of families down on their luck unhoused by Wells Fargo’s regular course of day-to-day business practices.”

The solution’s probably about as red as their balance sheet was around this week 17 years ago.

“Just got back from the Middle East. What a point in time it was!!! The crowd for Charlie K’s Presidential Medal of Freedom presentation is so big and enthusiastic I moved it out to the new Rose Garden, where everyone can see the Presidential Wall of Fame and Palm Court renovation. Enter through Main South Entrance,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday.

“Attire: business or business casual. The cash bar will have spritzers and fresh mozzarella crostini sandwiches for sale if you missed lunch. Email playlist suggestions to scheung@whitehouse.gov and be sure to include the Spotify link to the song you want me to play,” Trump did not write but implied.

“Israel plans to halve aid into Gaza, accuses Hamas of violating ceasefire with slow release of dead hostages,” writes the AP’s Seung Min Kim in a tweet, copied verbatim to not butcher the impact and timing less than 12 hours after the Orange God Emperor returned to Washington from his UNPRECEDENTED HISTORIC VICTORY FOR PEACE IN OUR TIME and little side dealings too.

The “We’re saving the family unit” is a particularly nice touch from a guy who has a half-brother from his dad’s third wife – a year older than his niece – and his mom’s buried on a golf course.

“Please take notice that on October 20, 2025, James Comey, by counsel, will file his motion to dismiss challenging the lawfulness of the appointment of the United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia. The Court advised at arraignment that such motion will require designation of and assignment to an out-of-district judge to hear and resolve that motion. Thus, in the interest of efficiency and to avoid any unnecessary delay in such process, Mr Comey files the instant Notice to formally alert the Court,” wrote former FBI Director James Comey’s lawyers in their latest move to undermine the already pretty fucking weak case by challenging the legality of former insurance lawyer Lindsey Halligan’s non-Senate-confirmed appointment to US Attorney for Eastern Virginia.

It’s not clear how quickly New York Attorney General Letitia James’s defense team will copy-and-paste from Comey’s notice and submit it to the court or if they’ll just use ChatGPT to spit that out.

The political crisis in France has gotten so bad that the Telegraph reports that not only is the government in danger of collapse but the entire system of government – the Fifth Republic, established by Charles De Gaulle in 1958 – may end up going down in flames too.

The Speaker and his minions already announced they’re nominating convicted felon President Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize to make up for the fact that they’ve never done so.

Deranged Pennsylvania terrorist Cody Balmer on Tuesday pleaded guilty to the charges against him in the firebombing of Dem Gov Josh Shapiro’s residence in Harrisburg, NewsNation reports.

The US Supreme Court on Tuesday denied certiorari to both of conspiracy freak Alex Jones’s two desperate petitions to save InfoWars from being acquired by the Onion and to overturn the $1.4 billion defamation judgment against him over the Sandy Hook massacre conspiracy bullshit, dooming the raspy-voiced scumbag to having to go and find a real job, USA Today reports.

In related news, the New York Times on Monday confirmed the story about Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche cracking the whip at his feckless subordinate “Eagle Ed” Martin over the latter’s stupid attempt to intervene on Jones’s behalf by stirring up a fake investigation into former FBI agent William Aldenberg – who had responded to the scene of the 2012 massacre and later served as an advisor to the families in their case against Jones. “A ticked-off Mr Blanche asked Mr Martin: Why pick a pointless fight that would embarrass the administration on behalf of a fringe activist? He demanded that Mr Martin rescind the letter, according to three people briefed on a phone call between the two men,” the Times wrote of the misadventure that ended with Martin doing just that.

Worth raising is if Blanche might’ve been more willing to stick the regime’s necks out for the neckless gay frogs nutcase if he had behaved more compliantly about the Jeffrey Epstein matter.

It’s almost as though all this cunty whining from House Majority Whip Tom Emmer is meant to demonstrate what NOT to do when you want to message to Americans that the planned protests against the Trump Regime are not actually that big of a deal and the participants are just a disgruntled minority who cannot do anything meaningful to dent the GOP’s confidence and bravado.

Virginia federal Judge Michael S Nachmanoff handed the Trump Regime more bad news Monday in their already weak “case” against James Comey, siding with the former FBI director on the matter of access to the “evidence” against him, giving Comey much freer rein when the Justice Department had wanted to hamstring his defense with a maze of needless and opaque restrictions.

“The Court shares the government’s concern regarding the possibility of inappropriate dissemination of sensitive information as well as Defendant’s concern regarding his ability to defend himself, and both parties’ interest in a fair trial. In balancing these considerations, the Court finds that the circumstances of this case do not support the government’s proposed limitations on the sharing of ‘Protected Material’ with Defendant or prospective defense witnesses, which would unnecessarily hinder and delay Defendant’s ability to adequately prepare for trial. The Court further finds the government’s proposal does not sufficiently define information constituting ‘Protected Material,’ thereby making it overbroad,” the judge wrote, pulling another block from the Reich’s Jenga tower.

A Villages, Florida-area Trump fanboy is currently being held at the Sumter County Jail on $150 bond after he was arrested on a theft charge over a $15.50 bar tab he was unable to pay Thursday night at Gator’s Dockside at Brownwood, Villages-News reports. According to a police report, 37 year-old Kyle James Horne, who likes posting men’s rights memes like “Keeping a MAN away from his KIDS because of a FAILED RELATIONSHIP is CHILD ABUSE in disguise,” on Facebook, first ran into trouble when he claimed he left his wallet at home upon being confronted over the unpaid tab.

Horne then attempted to effect the payment through a wallet app on his phone, but at some point the restaurant personnel saw on the screen that Horne had insufficient funds in his account and could not cover the $15.50 bill. It was at that point that Horne began profanely berating the staff and then fled. The manager called the cops, who apprehended Horne as he was walking nearby. Horne remains jailed, unable to pay the $150 bond, nearly 10 times the cost of the liquor he couldn’t afford.

“Time Magazine wrote a relatively good story about me, but the picture may be the Worst of All Time. They ‘disappeared’ my hair, and then had something floating on top of my head that looked like a floating crown, but an extremely small one. Really weird! I never liked taking pictures from underneath angles, but this is a super bad picture, and deserves to be called out. What are they doing, and why?” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday.

Date-rapey Fox Newsbro Jesse Watters and fey short kid Greg Gutfeld who Watters lets hang out with him to make him feel even more self-confident worked through their feelings about the Tom Homan bribery shitshow on Monday, assuring themselves and viewers that either it isn’t true. Or that it is true but it was some kind of entrapment scheme by the Biden DOJ. Or that if it is true it doesn’t matter because he’s a Republican and the pro-Democrat media have already disqualified the case against Homan because of all of their years of biased coverage so it’s completely fine.

“Lt Gov Dan Patrick and Speaker of the Texas House Dustin Burrows today announced the Senate and House General Investigating Committees on the July 2025 Flooding Events. Created by Senate Resolution 2 and House Resolution 177 from the second called special session of the 89th Legislature, these committees will meet jointly. Upon announcement, Lt Gov Patrick and Speaker Burrows named committee members and issued the following statements: ‘In July, Texans were deeply saddened by the deadly flooding on the Guadalupe River, where amongst many others, 27 vibrant young girls were lost from one camp, Camp Mystic,’ said Lt Gov Dan Patrick.”

“‘I was shocked to see Camp Mystic begin signing up campers for next year with so many questions unanswered about what happened that fateful morning. Today, I appointed the members of the Senate General Investigating Committee on the July 2025 Flooding Events to get to the bottom of exactly what occurred. This committee’s task is to examine the facts and circumstances surrounding the July flooding, including actions taken at youth summer camps. The families who lost their precious daughters deserve answers, as do all Texans, on exactly what happened on July 4th. Camp Mystic has not spoken publicly on the record as to what happened that morning. They will be invited to testify, as will others involved in this flooding event,'” says a joint press release from Texas Lt Governor Dannie Goeb, aka Dan Patrick, and Speaker of the state House Dustin Burrows.

Noticing that the “+” was abruptly minus-ed from the logo for the tech leviathan’s video streaming service, Variety looked into it and found a mention that “Apple TV+ is now simply Apple TV, with a vibrant new identity,” in the press release for the upcoming debut of Apple Studios’ blockbuster hit F1:The Movie in the now-nonplussed service’s catalog. The “vibrant” part is also pretty accurate as there will be a subtle rainbow spectrum gradient on the app icon in the next iOS update.

The rebrand follows that of HBO Max to just “Max” which then de-rebranded to HBO Max. Disney+, Paramount+, ESPN+, AMC+, BET+, MGM+, Hallmark+, NASA+, and Truth+ remain fully plussed.