Republican Attorney General Austin Knudsen admitted to recruiting a primary challenger so that he could use the opponent to increase fundraising results according to a recording of Knudsen made at a fundraiser, the Associated Press reports.

A former Speaker of the state house, Knudsen had no GOP challenger to his incumbency but told the audience at a May 11th fundraiser in Dillon, that he made sure candidate Logan Dillon “filed to run against me simply because under our current campaign finance laws in Montana, it allows me to raise more money. So, he supports me and he’s going to vote for me.”

Montana Democrats filed a lawsuit alleging that Knudsen was taking more than the state-allowed $790 per person limit allowed when a candidate runs unopposed, so rather than return the money, he got Dillon to file against him on the deadline day for candidate applications.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average closed above 40,000 for the first time Friday, ending the day at 40,003.59, topping another milestone in steady American economy, per CNN.  After dipping its toe over the line in midday trading Thursday, the index opened up and finished the day strong.  While 40,000 is an arbitrary value, the achievement reflects solid market performance since a brief downturn in September 2022.

“On behalf of the future Vice President of the United States, who I have not yet chosen, we hereby accept the Fox Vice Presidential Debate, hopefully at Virginia State University, the first Historically Black College or University to host a Debate – Date to be determined. I urge Vice President Kamala Harris to agree to this,” posted disgraced former President Trump on Friday, apparently still antsy that he said yes to the two debates for himself and for his not yet chosen running mate on CNN, ABC, and CBS, respectively, without trying to get one on more fascist, white nationalist friendly turf.

Unlike when Trump “accepted” an October 2nd debate on the propaganda network between himself and Biden on Wednesday (which Biden’s campaign promptly shut down), Fox is actually on board with this sandbag, with anchor Bret Baier announcing their “proposal” on Friday afternoon. Must be some kind of mea culpa to Trump for not backing him on the October 2nd challenge he made up.

The fat bastard later posted “I have accepted a fourth Presidential Debate against Crooked Joe Biden, this time with NBC & Telemundo. It is important as Republicans that we WIN with our Great Hispanic Community, who Biden has devastated with Crippling Inflation, High Gas Prices, Crime in our Streets, and Border Chaos. This Fourth Debate will go along with our previously accepted Presidential Debates on CNN, ABC, and Fox. This is all in addition to our accepting an invitation from Bret Baier and Martha MacCallum of Fox News to host the Vice Presidential Debate at Virginia State University, or another venue, in Virginia, to be named later. These are the Debates that Voters have been asking for, and these are the Debates that Voters will get!” again lying that Fox News will actually host any debate. NBC/Telemundo does however sound more realistic and palatable to the Biden team as the Spanish-language network (but not NBC) was at least one of the four that fit the criteria set forth by the president’s reelection campaign. So maybe there will be a third showdown.

“Due to the potential for terrorist attacks, demonstrations, or violent actions against US citizens and interests, the Department of State advises US citizens overseas to exercise increased caution. The Department of State is aware of the increased potential for foreign terrorist organization-inspired violence against LGBTQI+ persons and events and advises US citizens overseas to exercise increased caution. US citizens should stay alert in locations frequented by tourists, including Pride celebrations and venues frequented by LGBTQI+ persons,” says a State Department advisory.

The glass half full of this clip of KSTP Minneapolis’s Tom Hauser is unambiguously a a good glass as he cuts away and makes it clear Trump is full of shit. The half empty part is how he did that instead of just saying it to Trump’s face during the interview. But on net this is the kind of shit local news viewers should be seeing in the coverage of the pornstar fucker… though maybe we could’ve done without the “joking” part. Even if that was true it had nothing to do with whether or not the fat fuck denied saying what he had said to the crowd at the rally in Duluth in the fall of 2020.

Former Pennsylvania Christian school teacher L Brent Bozell IV, son of movement conservative crusader L Brent Bozell III, was sentenced to 45 months in federal prison for felonies committed during his participation in the January 6th, 2021 Capitol insurrection, NBC’s Ryan J Reilly reports.

A federal judge on Friday sentenced San Francisco-area QAnon freak David DePape to 30 years in prison for bashing in the head of Paul Pelosi during an October 2022 home invasion, the AP reports.

DePape, who is not a male hooker hired by Pelosi as the MAGA trolls claimed in the immediate aftermath of the attack, still faces trial on state-level charges of assault with a deadly weapon, elder abuse, residential burglary and other felonies, with jury selection set to start next week.

Or maybe not forgot so much as simply claims she did not testify with sometimes graphic detail about the two-minute sexual encounter she had with the white nationalist Congressman’s Orange Jesus.

The swearing-in ceremony for a new county Board of Commissioners in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula was supposed to take place Wednesday night is now been postponed indefinitely after the two GOP members of the Delta County Board of Canvassers refused to certify their election because the tallies of the votes in the three races was too proportional, Iron Mountain Daily News reports.

Seriously. “They’re basing their decision on the ratio of the votes, because two of (the races) have the exact same ratio and the third one was a similar ratio, so they think that that shows that the machines were somehow programmed with (an) algorithm,” said County Clerk Nancy Przewrocki, adding “I tried to tell them that the machines have been tested and the results came out exactly as they should. I have every confidence in our voting equipment because it’s always tested and in the recounts and the audits we have done, the ballot hand count has always come out exactly very close to… the tabulator results.” Problem is that three challengers defeated three incumbents with 72 percent of the vote to 27 percent, or 73 to 26 percent in the case of the third.

So the two canvassers – whose job does not entail deciding the validity of the election – refused to certify, with one them, Bonnie Hakkola the county GOP chairwoman, being advised by her son, Seth, who is active in the “Stop the Steal” movement. “A news release dated Monday but sent to the Daily Press late Tuesday by her son, Seth Hakkola, indicates local citizens working with members of Michigan-based groups that deny the validity of the 2020 presidential election have ‘identified certain statistical anomalies and suspicious voting ratios,'” the Iron Mountain Daily News writes.

Complete fucking worm disbarred MAGA lawyer John Eastman pleaded not guilty to crimes related to his attempts to overturn the 2020 election in Arizona on Friday, CNN reports. “I, of course, plead not guilty,” Eastman told reporters outside the Phoenix courthouse after the hearing. “I’m confident that, with the laws faithfully applied, I will be exonerated at the end of this process.”

We question how confident he is really considering that the process which took away his law license, now just steps away from being permanent, did not actually end with his exoneration.

“Flying an upside-down American flag – a symbol of the so-called ‘Stop the Steal’ movement – clearly creates the appearance of bias. Justice Alito should recuse himself immediately from cases related to the 2020 election and the January 6th insurrection, including the question of the former President’s immunity in US v Donald Trump, which the Supreme Court is currently considering. The Court is in an ethical crisis of its own making, and Justice Alito and the rest of the Court should be doing everything in their power to regain public trust. This latest story is further proof that Congress needs to pass the SCERT Act to create an enforceable code of conduct for the Supreme Court. Supreme Court justices should be held to the highest ethical standards, not the lowest,” meowed Senate Judiciary Committee chairman Dick Durbin at Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito over the inverted flag “Mrs Alito” flew after fat former President Trump lost the 2020 election.

Grow some fucking balls dude. Just announce a confirmation hearing for six new liberal justices and say Alito is free to retire if he doesn’t like the court having more than nine seats. Time to man up and put them on the defensive while the Dems still have a majority in the Senate. Stop letting them piss on your faces while you say “Well at least it’s not that warm, yellow, and salty this time.”

In related news Alito gave a statement to Fox’s Shannon Bream where he said the neighbors had a “Fuck Trump” sign up and the wife was responding with the upside-down American flag. “Justice Alito says he and his wife were walking in the neighborhood and there were words between Mrs Alito and a male at the home with the sign. Alito says the man engaged in vulgar language, ‘including the c-word’. Following that exchange, Mrs Alito was distraught and hung the flag upside down ‘for a short time’. Justice Alito says some neighbors on his street are ‘very political’ and acknowledges it was a very heated time in January 2021,” Bream wrote. Which means he’s admitting that yes, the Alitos flew a “Stop the Steal” signal in response to their lib neighbors hating Trump.

“We are deeply concerned by reports suggesting that the US Marshal Service did not provide medically necessary health care services to two prisoners in its custody: Ms Jean Marshall, 74, and Heather Idoni, 59. On May 15, 2024, Ms Marshall was sentenced to 15 additional months in prison, and Ms Idoni is scheduled to be sentenced next week. We ask Director Davis to provide a clear and comprehensive account of the care provided to Ms Idoni and Ms Marshall during their time in the custody of the US Marshals Service. As you know, the US Marshal Services is required to provide appropriate medical care for all prisoners. US Marshals Service Policy Directive – Prisoner Health Care Management states that ‘All prisoners will receive medically necessary health care services.'”

“This is defined as ‘[n]ecessary to diagnose or treat a medical condition, which, if left untreated, would likely lead to a significant loss of function, deterioration of health, uncontrolled suffering, or death,'” write a bunch of MAGA House members in a letter to US Marshal Service Director Ronald Davis and Federal Bureau Of Prisons Director Colette Peters. Signatories include Andy Biggs, Claudia Tenney, and Harriet Hagerman, all calling themselves the “Pro-Life Caucus.”

Interesting choice of words that “medically necessary health care services” part. Sounds familiar.

House Oversight ranking member Jaime Raskin tells CBS’s Scott MacFarlane that Thursday night’s shitshow of a hearing was partially alcohol-fueled as some members had been boozing, even in the room. Just like the member who uttered the words “bleach blonde butch body,” in accordance with standards of Congressional decorum on addressing others, Raskin did not name names.

Good morning to everyone except hoodlum @JasmineForUS who made a fool of her self last night in congress.

— George Santos (@MrSantosNY) May 17, 2024

In related news a former member of Congress tweeted an opinion about the way Jasmine Crockett openly mocked Marjorie Taylor Greene and Anna Paulina Luna at the hearing, though we suspect some of that is jealousy as he wishes “Kitara” was half as witty and vivacious as Crockett.

“Going to Barron’s High School Graduation. Great student, wonderful boy! Very exciting!!! DJT” fat former President Trump posted Friday morning to let everyone know he was DEFINITELY going to the commencement and not sitting in his bedroom looking at old issues of Hustler magazine.

Commission on Presidential Debates Chairman Frank Fahrenkopf is understandably pissed that the Biden and Trump campaigns are bypassing their system this year by setting up their own face-offs hosted by CNN and ABC News (with maybe more on the way). But he tells Politico Playbook he’s nevertheless impressed by how well Biden played this and got Trump to take the bait, saying the fat fuck’s immediate and unconditional acceptance “could end up being one of the great blunders of the entire election cycle,” adding “Someone called me this morning and said it was political malpractice.”

Farenkopf says he suspects Trump completely ignored his campaign staff and posted “Let’s get ready to Rumble!!!” just 43 minutes after Biden challenged him, without bothering to read the details of Biden’s terms. “It was a pretty spectacular job by the Biden people,” said Farenkopf.

Asked for comment in response to Farenkopf’s scoring, Trump campaign chair Chris LaCivita lost his shit. “Frank’s political analysis is as relevant as the Commission on Presidential Debates is… which is… oh wait… done. The bottom line is we have debates that are a far cry more than an outdated Washington committee filled with a bunch of washed up swamp rats could deliver. Frank’s a cassette tape living in a digital world and some of the biggest political blunders on the Republican side have been in participating in his ‘commission’s’ debates,” wrote LaCivita in a text. The reaction kind of tracks with CNN’s Wednesday afternoon reporting that Team Orange was “irked” by “the fact that Joe Biden somehow took over the debate narrative” by moving first that morning.

In a total throwback to the mid-20th century anti-colonial uprisings and conflicts that largely ended the once-vast global empires of the European powers, the French government in 2024 is rushing to contain an outbreak of violence on the distant Pacific island territory of New Caledonia, as unrest sparked by a pro-independence movement among the native Kanak people has led to rampant arson, looting, and violent clashes that have left at least five dead, the AP reports.

French President Emmanuel Macron has declared a state of emergency lasting at least 12 days and sent 1,000 troops the island of 270,000 lying about 900 miles northeast of Brisbane, Australia. It’s not the first rodeo there as the last time France imposed a state of emergency was in 1985. The freedom fighters’ main gripe is the National Assembly in Paris this week passing a law allowing residents who have lived in New Caledonia for 10 years to cast ballots in provincial elections, which seriously pissed off the Kanaks. The indigenous group comprises a roughly 40 percent plurality in the territory but fear the Metropolitan French are purposely encouraging more people to relocate to the colony to water down Kanak political power. Complicating matters is some Azerbaijani fuckery, as France has (with evidence) accused the grimy former Soviet state of supporting the Kanak nationalist movement in retaliation for French support of the Azeris’ hated rivals in Armenia.

Under the mess is a large deposit of nickel, crucial to EV battery production. Above it is the simple fact that, unlike most other French territories in the Carribbean, South America, and the Indian Ocean, New Caledonia is not fully integrated, although residents are enfranchised in the presidential and European Parliament elections. It’s on Paris to invest in the people with exceptional political and economic generosity if they want to hang on to the islands, and it’s on the Kanaks to demand a very, very large percentage of the royalties from nickel extraction disbursed onto debit cards with their national flag on it. The other option might seem awesome at first, but probably ends with a shit ton of Chinese communist navy personnel calling the place home by the end of this decade.

Dem think tank Third Way will this weekend try to get this ad in front of fat former President Trump by running it in New York City, Palm Beach, and in Dallas where the Orange God Emperor is headlining the annual convention for violent right wing terrorist group National Rifle Association.

“Seventy-three percent of people step into a religious place of worship at least once during the year on the primary day of worship (eg Sundays for most Christian churches). However, only 5 percent of Americans attend services ‘weekly,’ far fewer than the roughly 22 percent who report they do so in surveys” says the abstract of a University of Chicago study of cell phone GPS data out of a sample of 2.1 million anonymized phones examined in a ten-month period from April 2019 to February 2020.

“The intensity of religious observance correlates with a host of other activities. For example, relative to non-attenders and infrequent attenders, frequent religious attenders are less likely to go to strip clubs, liquor stores, and casinos,” the study also found, a surprising indicator that at least some of the Americans who moralize based on religion are not in fact fucking hypocrites.

In what seems like it’ll be the new normal, CTV News reports that 122 wildfires – 32 of them deemed “out of control” – most of them in the northern reaches of British Columbia and Alberta or in neighboring Saskatchewan or the Northwest Territories – are burning as of Friday morning.

At least 60,000 people have been evacuated in Alberta alone – remember, this is a pretty vast and sparsely populated region, which speaks to the scale of the fires. More than 4,000 square kilometers have been burned already in 1,023 recorded wildfires in 2024. The weather forecast calls for a low pressure system bringing light rain over the next few days that will slow but not snuff out the flames.