“DaVinci Code” author Dan Brown and his ex-wife Blythe Brown have settled a lawsuit in which Blythe alleged that Dan had led a “secret life”, the Associated Press reports. The “secret”? Dan was hiding millions of dollars from Blythe and banging other women on the side. There was no conspiracy that goes all the way to the top of the Vatican’s power structure, or symbols hidden in a Renaissance painting depicting Jesus’s life, just some nerd who married a woman in his age and in his league when he was middle class dude and suddenly decided he can fuck around on the side after making tens of millions in royalties from the sales of his lame books. Mystery solved.