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Calling January 6th attack “selfish, not patriotic,” federal judge takes veiled swipe at Trump at sentencing for insurrectionist

With more than 800 January 6th insurrectionists already sentenced–and more to come, including the headliners–the editorial team at National Zero opted long ago to not cover every trial and sentencing unless it dealt with something unique.  Today, we had unique:  during the sentencing of Taylor James Johnatakis, a judge appointed by Ronald Reagan noted that the convict’s diminishing of the Republican-led attack on Congress and his subsequent posturing as a victim in a “gulag” demonstrated his lack of remorse, CNN reports.

Judge Royce Lamberth chided Johnatakis for claiming, “everything about January 6 is just overblown.”  “This cannot become normal… We cannot condone the normalization of the January 6 US Capitol riot,” Lamberth responded, noting that denials of responsibility like Johnatakis’s will lead to a “vicious cycle … that could imperil our institutions” as losers of elections resort to their followers undertaking “vigilantism, lawlessness and anarchy” instead of accepting loss.

Lambeth went on to make a not-so-veiled swipe at Trump, saying the attack was a “selfish, not patriotic” act.  “There can be no room in our country for this sort of political violence,” Lambeth said before sentencing Johnatakis to more than seven years.

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Questions arise about legality of Canadian podcaster’s paycheck

Host of the Verdict with Ted Cruz podcast Ted Cruz, who moonlights as a member of the United States Senate (R-Quintana Roo), claims that he doesn’t get paid to host his podcast Verdict with Ted Cruz, but the distributor of Ted Cruz’s podcast Verdict with Ted Cruz gave the host’s PAC more than $630,000 in 2023, KTRK ABC-13 in Houston reports.

The distributor, iheartmedia, made the contributions to the Truth and Courage PAC, a curious name for a PAC whose sole purpose is to reelect a man who fled Texas during a snowstorm and lied about it.  That man, incidentally, hosts a podcast called Verdict with Ted Cruz.  iheartmedia told the Houston Chronicle the money came from ad revenue generated by the podcast, which would mean Cruz, the host of the podcast Verdict with Ted Cruz, was working on ad revenue share agreement, requiring a whole lot of financial disclosures and income reporting that neither Cruz nor the distributor completed.

“Because the media doesn’t report on news, and I do the podcast to talk to the people of Texas about the issues that matter,” Cruz condescendingly told a reporter asking about his no-pay contract with a major campaign donor.

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Iger fights off ouster attempt at Disney by DeSantis ally

Disney CEO Bob Iger put down an attempt to overthrow the executive team at the entertainment led by a major backer of Republican Florida Governor and failed presidential aspirant Ron DeSantis, maintaining control of the company.

At a shareholder meeting on Wednesday, Iger announced that a recent agreement with DeSantis’s administration regarding the administration of Disney property in Florida is a “win-win” for the state and the company.  The agreement, per the Orlando Sentinel, reverts the management of the area to a 2020 comprehensive plan –from before DeSantis’s culture war stunt–but provides that the new Central Florida Tourism Oversight District puppet board will “consult with Disney” on anything it does.

DeSantis ally Nelson Peltz, meanwhile, attempted to unseat Iger, having said that Disney lost its way and wanting to return the company to focus on dominance at theaters with family-friendly entertainment.  His attempt to take over the board and oust Iger received support of just 31% of shareholders.

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CORRECTION to major math fuckup by Spartan

Well first the actual news that led to the discovery of this fuckup: Fat former President Trump’s turnout in Tuesday’s uncontested Republican primaries continued to lag that of his uncontested primaries in 2020, showing a drop in the “enthusiasm” for him touted back then.

Date State 2020 2024 Percentage change
April 2, 2024 Connecticut 71,667 33,648 – 53.04
Rhode Island 19,176 10,553 – 44.96
Wisconsin 616,782 472,227 – 23.43

That’s the trend I identified in Saturday’s lengthy piece titled “Not better off than he was four years ago.” As I was wrapping it up when I was tired, distracted, and nearly passed out in the shower less than an hour later due to I still don’t know what the hell happened but I got really sick and it fucking sucked, especially on Easter. The point is that the bottom line I stated in that article was wildly off: The circa nine million vote/69 percent deficit from 2020 was, as of Saturday, actually just over a million and 8.94 percent. Don’t know what the fuck I did wrong, but I think it was a stray click in the 2024 column’s sum formula on my spreadsheet. Just a visual review would’ve caught that.

Irrespective of my dumbassery that nearly 9 percent drop overall as of Saturday, which increases to 9.7 percent as of Wednesday, and stands at 17.11 percent since Nikki Haley dropped out on March 6th is just… It’s really not a good sign for the fat fuck when we were told in 2020 that he was absolutely unstoppable because he got so many of his fans to show up for him in uncontested primaries. It got even worse this week in the three states that had primaries on Tuesday (well it was four, but the New York GOP canceled their primary in 2020 so we kind of can’t run a comparison).

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Judge Merchan spikes Trump’s “presidential immunity” bullshit

“This Court finds that Defendant had myriad opportunities to raise the claim of presidential immunity well before March 7, 2024. Defendant could have done so in his omnibus motions on September 29, 2023, which were filed a mere six days before he briefed the same issue in his Federal Insurrection Matter and several months after he brought his motion for removal to federal court on May 4, 2023.”

“Further, the Defendant could have expanded his argument on this topic in his motions in limine or in his opposition to the People’s motions in limine but he did not. Lastly, having addressed the issue of timeliness and turning to Defendant’s motion for preclusion of the People’s evidence of the alleged ‘pressure campaign,’ the Court reminds Defendant that it already ruled on this issue in its Decision and Order on Defendant’s Motions in Limine at pgs 7-8. Defendant’s motion is DENIED in its entirety as untimely. The Court declines to consider whether the doctrine of presidential immunity precludes the introduction of evidence of purported official presidential acts in a criminal proceeding,” wrote Judge Juan Merchan as he handed another L to fat former President Trump on Wednesday.

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White House directs NASA to establish time standard for Moon

Preparing for a future where activities on the Moon need to be coordinated across its surface and with people on Earth, the White House has directed NASA to create a time standard for the Moon and other celestial bodies, Reuters reports, as the US works to set the standards to be adopted internationally.

Designated “Coordinated Lunar Time” and abbreviated as “LTC,” the standard is needed because the time moves faster on the Moon than it does on Earth, with the two bodies differing by an average of 58.7 microseconds per day.  Over days (on Earth), that difference could cause problems for equipment that is supposed to synchronize between the two bodies in space, as well as with finely-tuned instruments and machines that would run autonomously on future missions.

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MAGA groomer congressman eyes Tennessee governor’s mansion

Tennessee MAGA Congressman John Rose is a 2020 election denier who started dating his wife in 2007 when she was a 17 year old high school student and a member of the Future Farmers of America and he was a 42 year old tech entrepreneur and Tennessee Vice Chairman for FFA. They were married four years later, while she was still an undergrad in college (they still are and have at least two kids). The Republican Acting Attorney General of Alaska resigned in 2021 over after being implicated in statutory rape in which both he and the victim were similarly dispositioned with Sniffen in 1989 a 27 year-old coach of a mock trial team and his victim a 17 year-old student. So it might be fair to say that Rose, who flies under the radar now as a backbencher, could face a lot of scrutiny for his grooming ways if he should have ambitions for another office in the Volunteer State.

Funny that, as the Tennessee Journal on Wednesday reported that Rose recently hosted a dinner for state lawmakers to talk about his future plans and confirmed he’s got eyes on the governor’s mansion in Nashville. “Well, it’s something I’m thinking about,” Rose said to the paywalled outlet.

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Mr Hankey’s a real piece of shit

Fat former President Trump’s sugar daddy Don Hankey, who put up the $175 million bond for the slob to appeal the massive New York State judgment against his corrupt business empire, turns out to be previously known to Donald’s failed presidential administration. And not in a good way.

The Daily Beast reports that in September 2017 the Trump Justice Department under then-US Attorney General Jeff Sessions sued Hankey’s company Westlake Services – a scammy daytime TV commercial payday and auto loan operation – for violating the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act by illegally repossessing at least 70 cars owned by active duty military personnel. Westlake settled immediately and paid $700,000 in restitution to the troops plus a $61,000 fine. This was far from the largest hit Westlake ever took from Uncle Sam for fucking around as it came just two years after they paid out $44 million in restitution plus a civil fine of $4.25 million when the CFPB took them on for “illegal debt collection tactics” over God knows what the hell kind of awful shit.

In very much related news the Clerk of the New York County Supreme Court on Tuesday rejected the Trump legal team’s filing of the bond that Hankey’s covering, writing “The court has returned the documents listed below for the following reasons: Please include a current financial statement and Power of Attorney. Additionally, please list the name of the Attorney-in-Fact under the signature line on the Undertaking. Please use the ‘Refile Document’ link for Doc No 1707 to resubmit the corrected filing. Thank you and have a great day.” What the “current financial statement” part means exactly we don’t know, but the possibilities range from a simple paperwork fuckup to Trump just now being informed that he needs to supply a full financial statement to a public appellate docket.

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Surprise! Asshole who rammed SUV into FBI gate a QAnon freak

You will not be shocked the learn that the dipshit who rammed his SUV into the gates outside of the FBI’s Atlanta field office on Monday is a QAnon fan. Wired reports they looked into Navy veteran Ervin Lee Bolling’s social media history and found that he checks a lot of boxes: Anti-vax bullshit, writing “I love you” in response to a December 2020 Trump tweet about the election being stolen from him, numerous interactions with QAnon influencers, a “Release the Kraken” comment, et cetera.

Just think of all those smartss, know-it-all internet liberals who saw that news on Monday and immediately thought “Oh I bet that guy’s some kind of QAnon asshole” only to find out they were 100 percent correct in that assumption. Imagine the look on their faces as their preconceived biases about such an individual were confirmed with absolutely airtight precision accuracy.

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Check out this cool event at Georgetown University next week!

Forget the juxtaposition of the word “strong” with the face of its opposite, the possibly intentional choice of the photo with that face expressing that non-strength, the overall poor choice of a speaker, (lower case “speaker,” meaning speaker for this event) a person whose career is defined by enabling those who seek to exploit the weaknesses in democracy when he wasn’t exploiting said weaknesses himself and ask yourself one question: Will those fucking pro-Hamas socialist punk-asses finally show up and make a huge scene when it’s a Republican? Can this be the moment they choose to switch it up for once? Will they dump a bucket of fake blood on him?

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Israeli wartime cabinet minister calls for early elections

In what we vaguely understand to be a big deal, Axios’s Barak Ravid reports Israeli wartime cabinet minister Benny Gantz on Wednesday called for early elections to be held in September.

The only vagueness here is whether Gantz has any power to make it happen or if he’s merely expressing his opinion. Or somewhere in between. Dictator Benjamin Netanyahu is for far more obvious reasons adamantly opposed to holding an election as he prefers to not have to go to prison.

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Tulsa Glabbard says she turned down JFK Jr invite to ticket

Former Congresswoman Tutsi Gibbon tells ABC News that John F Kennedy Jr asked her to be his running mate in their awesome crusade to take down the Deep State censorship complex because she thought John was dead and that his new persona “Robert,” a weird dude with a fucked up voice who’s into old people steroids wasn’t the JFK Jr she knew and loved. Plus Gubbard was annoyed that he didn’t really understand what her new age “Hindu” cult was all about and didn’t want it to be a thing on the campaign trail because people might think the elephant with the extra arms was like some kind of Republican octopus hybrid and they’re trying to reach out to disaffected Dem voters…

Well maybe that’s what ABC News’s article said. It’s just an educated guess since we didn’t even skim it. Also should check the spelling of Tootsie Gerber’s name, there might be a silent Q in there.

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Team Trump don’t “think our messaging needs to change” during NYC trial, since “it’ll be just as effective” as it was in primary

Staffers on disgraced former President Trump’s campaign tell Semafor they think everything will go smoothly when the fat bastard goes on trial in Manhattan in less than two weeks, even as their demented candidate will be tied down in court four days a week for fucking a pornstar for 45 seconds in 2006 and then paying her $130,000 to stay quiet in the days before the 2016 election.

“This is just the progression of where the campaign season is headed into,” said one minion, resigned to the uncertainty. “Certainly, he’ll have to be in court quite a few days out of the week, and that’s never an ideal thing. We would never wish to be in that position, of course.” Another sycophant was more panglossian about the whole thing, saying “I don’t think our messaging needs to change. It’ll be just as effective during the primary as it will be in the general, or vice versa.” Meaning that this person thinks that suburban normies are going to buy in to the whole “persecution” schtick the same way culty redneck GOP primary voters did to Ron DeSantis’s dismay.

The Daily Beast’s lead Wednesday story touches on the logistical shitshow Trump faces in the likely event of a conviction, that he could be prevented from leaving New York State and thus appearing in person at the nominating convention in July if he ends up getting sentenced to probation.

In related news, DA Alvin Bragg on Wednesday responded to Team Orange’s ongoing bullshit and games in a motion opposing their request for a delay, writing “The Court should deny defendant’s eighth request to adjourn the start of this trial—this time, based on a claim of pretrial publicity—because (1) publicity is unlikely to recede and an indefinite adjournment is inappropriate; (2) thorough voir dire can allow the parties to select an impartial jury, as defendant’s commissioned poll shows; and (3) defendant’s own incessant rhetoric is generating significant publicity, and it would be perverse to reward defendant with an adjournment based on media attention he is actively seeking.”

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The Guardian’s reporting on TMTG’s shady Russian funding names an “Aleksander Smirnov” but does not further elaborate on it

A new report Tuesday in the Guardian on Trump Media and Technology Group’s funding from some incredibly fucking shady Carribbean bank owned by Russian-American scumbag Anton Postolnikov – who’s under federal investigation for money laundering – mentions a tantalizing name, but only once and in passing with no further details on the possible connection to other MAGA political corruption.

“Postolnikov, the nephew of Aleksandr Smirnov, an ally of Russian president Vladimir Putin, has not been charged with a crime. In response to an email to Postolnikov seeking comment, a lawyer in Dominica representing Paxum Bank warned of legal action for reporting the contents of the leaked documents,” wrote the Guardian’s Trump beat guy Hugo Lowell. No other mention of Smirnov appears in the article. Maybe he isn’t the same asshole who’s currently in jail awaiting trial for feeding that fake tip to the FBI about the “Biden bribery” that House Republicans tried to use to impeach Joe. Maybe “Alex Smirnov” is as common a name in Russia as “Bob Smith” is in the US.

And maybe the Guardian should’ve printed something like “(No relation to the indicted former FBI informant accused of lying to the FBI about President Biden’s son Hunter’s business ventures in Ukraine)” right after that if this Smirnov is indeed a different one. Why even mention the name at all if they’re not going to further explain its significance to what was otherwise a pretty dense story?

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George Conway makes max donation to Biden campaign

Movement conservative legal crusader George Conway, who essentially set in motion President Bill Clinton’s impeachment for getting a blowjob in the Oval Office and then lying about it in the 1990s and was for decades married to one of fat former President Trump’s top political consiglieres, Kellyanne, has written a $929,600 check – the maximum individual contribution permitted – to President Joe Biden’s reelection joint fundraising committee, Axios reports.

If you’re a millennial relatively new to politics who didn’t pay attention to shit while in grammar school you’ve always known Conway to be a vocal Trump antagonist. But if you watch the FX series “Impeachment: American Crime Story” you might be like “Holy fuck! This guy was basically a smarter and less creepy version of Stephen Miller back then… And Ann Coulter was actually hot?!?”

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Sexual predator-adjacent man-boy hypes “big announcement”

Oh wait, the headline’s not specific enough. Yes, Trump is a sexual predator too, but the one we meant is groomer Ali Akbar, aka Ali Alexander, the “Stop the Steal” asshole who ghosted last year after he was exposed as a statutory rapist by a now 20-something man came forward to the Daily Beast with texts from Alexander asking him to send dick pics when the kid was about 15.

Bruesewitz – who made no secret of his plans to primary Republican soon-to-be-ex-Wisconsin 8th Congressman Mike Gallagher even before Gallagher announced he wasn’t running for reelection and then resigning early – worked directly for Akbar Alexander in the “Stop the Steal” organization and pleaded the Fifth in a deposition with the House January 6th Select Committee when asked about his texts with white nationalist Congressman Paul Gosar during the Capitol riot.

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Russian official still blaming US for deadly ISIS attack

Russian National Security Council chief Nikolai Patrushev on Wednesday told his counterparts at a meeting of the Shanghai Cooperation Organization that he was still pretty sure the US and Ukraine were still somehow behind last months deadly attack on the Crocus City Hall venue in Moscow that killed more than 140 people even after the ISIS terrorists were arrested and it was revealed that US intel had tried to warn the Kremlin specifically that the venue was a potential target, the AP reports.

Oh that and ISIS claimed responsibility for it too. That part seems to get lost in the mix.

“They are trying to impose on us that the terrorist act was committed not by the Kyiv regime, but by supporters of radical Islamic ideology, perhaps members of the Afghan branch of IS,” Patrushev said at a meeting in Kazakhstan’s capital Astana of the SCO bloc which also includes China, India, and Iran. “However, it is much more important to quickly establish who is the customer and sponsor of this monstrous crime. Its traces lead to the Ukrainian special services. But everyone knows that the Kyiv regime is not independent and is completely controlled by the United States.”

Patrushev did not elaborate on whether he had came up with that himself or had read it on a blog by Matt Taibbi and/or Michael Shellenberger after snorting ketamine all night, though it seems likely.

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Nebraska governor supports killing off electoral vote split

“Today, Governor Jim Pillen issued the following statement in response to a call out for his support on LB 764, introduced by Senator Loren Lippincott. The bill proposes the reinstatement of the winner-take-all system for electing presidential and vice-presidential candidates, awarding all electoral votes to candidates receiving the highest number of votes in the state. ‘I am a strong supporter of Senator Lippincott’s winner- take-all bill (LB 764) and have been from the start. It would bring Nebraska into line with 48 of our fellow states, better reflect the founders’ intent, and ensure our state speaks with one unified voice in presidential elections. I call upon fellow Republicans in the Legislature to pass this bill to my desk so I can sign it into law,'” says a statement from Nebraska Gov Jim Pillen’s office, pasted to fat former President Trump’s Truth Social feed on Tuesday night.

“Governor Jim Pillen of Nebraska, a very smart and popular Governor, who has done some really great things, came out today with a very strong letter in support of returning Nebraska’s Electoral Votes to a Winner-Take-All System. Most Nebraskans have wanted to go back to this system for a very long time, because it’s what 48 other States do – It’s what the Founders intended, and it’s right for Nebraska,” Donald posted supporting the plan. Joe Biden of course won Nebraska’s 2nd District and its single electoral vote in 2020, flipping it blue after Trump took it from Hillary in 2016.

Note the “48 other states” part as none of that “what the Founders intended” shit applies in his mind to Maine, the only other state under the same Electoral College regime and where the fat fuck prevailed in that state’s 2nd District in both 2016 and 2020. Politico Playbook is skeptical that Nebraska’s GOP-majority unicameral state Senate can bang it out before their 2024 session ends next week, while noting that Maine’s state legislative session ends next week too in case the Dem majorities in both chambers there decide to act quickly to reciprocate Nebraska’s fuckery.

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Mastriano seems to notice weird pattern in chemtrails

QAnon fan Republican state senator and 2022 Pennsylvania gubernatorial nominee Doug Mastriano seems to be trying to point out some kind of Satanic or possibly Jewish symbol in the chemtrails over his home. Luckily he’s in a position to do something about it and is actually working on legislation to address the scourge of chemtrails rather than just posting about it like a crazy asshole.

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