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Surprise! Willie Brown says Trump full of shit with helicopter story

Former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown on Thursday told the San Francisco Chronicle that convicted felon former President Trump simply made up the story he told about them being on a helicopter together that nearly crashed. “I went down in a helicopter with him. We thought maybe this was the end. We were in a helicopter going to a certain location together, and there was an emergency landing. This was not a pleasant landing,” Trump said at Mar-a-Lago while claiming Brown had also told him “terrible things” about former girlfriend, now-Vice President Kamala Harris.

“You would have known if I had gone down on a helicopter with Trump. I’ve never been on a helicopter with Trump,” said Brown, adding that, though he did once have an emergency landing while on a helicopter ride, Trump was not on board. So that was either a lie or delusional ramblings.

On Trump’s claims of Brown badmouthing Harris, the former mayor said “It’s just as accurate as all of the other components of what you’re asking me about… Not accurate at all… I wouldn’t say anything bad about any woman to him. I would know better. It might encourage him to take a (verbal) shot.”

Brown, who did once fly on Trump’s plane – without Trump on it – told the Chronicle that he hasn’t spoken to Harris in three or four years and he “can’t understand what Trump has been doing” since Joe Biden “outmaneuvered everybody and put Kamala Harris in a position to make history.”

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Woman realizes too late that she’s setting husband’s truck on fire

An Addison, Pennsylvania woman faces one felony count of reckless burning or exploding after drunkenly dumping gas and lighting her husband’s truck following a domestic dispute, an inferno she attempted to put out after realizing belatedly she’d gone too far, The Tribune-Democrat reports.

Stacy Lynn Tressler, 42, told state troopers she had an argument with her husband and went to the local watering hole to throw back a few and chill out. Instead she got angrier, and upon returning home she promptly dumped two large red gas cans on the truck and lit it up. “Tressler said she then tried to extinguish the fire, but the flames had consumed the truck. She called her husband who telephoned 911. Addison Township Volunteer firefighters put out the fire,” the Tribune-Dem wrote.

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Ukrainians now almost 20 miles inside Russian border

A surprise Ukrainian offensive inside Russian territory – and the actual Russian Federation and not the occupied regions that were seized from 2014 onward – is still ongoing after three days and Kyiv’s tanks have made it to a village about 18.5 miles from the border, ABC News reports.

“Despite the attempts of the Russian joint forces group to stop the advance of Ukrainian mobile groups, the scale of the crisis is widening,” wrote Russian military blogger Rybar. The scale of the offensive is much larger than initially known as the Ukrainians appear to have at least two divisions on the ground on the Kursk Oblast, and seem to be headed toward a crucial highway.

“The current situation requires a certain amount of courage and concentration on ways to solve these complex, difficult, extraordinary tasks that are now facing all branches and all levels of government,” Russian dictator Vladimir Putin said at a meeting with Kursk regional acting Governor Alexei Smirnov on Thursday, which meant “If you don’t get your shit together now and find some way to unfuck this will window your ass so fast the pavement won’t even know you hit it.”

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Horrifying news for the chodes that take this bullshit seriously

Maybe we could’ve waited until Harris actually overtook Trump, but fuck it. Still funny that one Black woman or another combined are more likely to win than him, according to the shitbags who would post “BuT tEh bEtt1Ng MuRkeTs sAy TRUMP iS aHed!!!!111!!” under every poll that had him behind Biden since 2019 or whenever this circlejerk became a thing. The best part is that less than a month ago on July 16th – two days after he got shot – Trump was as high as 72 percent.

Things are even more dire on PredictIt, the original site for lame political bets, where Harris is up 57 cents to Trump’s 41 cents on the dollar, whatever that actually means in real life.

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“We are witnessing a kind of out of body experience”

Trump campaign pollster Tony Fabrizio tells Politico that the American electorate is in some sort of paranormal fugue state, and the “honeymoon” he promised is now an ethereal miasma of psychic energy that will dissipate once the otherworldly forces swirling around us release their grasp.

That’s not that much of an exaggeration of what he actually said: “We are witnessing a kind of out of body experience where we have suspended reality for a couple of weeks, and in that suspended reality, it’s almost like Kamala Harris never met Joe Biden, you know, they were passing acquaintances,” and that the campaign will work day and night tirelessly to prevent Harris from claiming “she has no responsibility for anything that happened in the Biden administration.”

It might help if they had candidate who would do that instead of claim Harris can’t be biracial, that the Capitol insurrection drew more people to DC than Martin Luther King, and apparently believes that being an “asylum seeker” simply means that a person has escaped from a mental asylum.

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Pennsylvania groundhog gets trapped in claw game machine

It’s not clear what happens when a Pennsylvania groundhog sees his reflection inside of one of those claw game machines filled with stuffed animals. Maybe it means the summer will last another six weeks. Or that the moon will collide with the planet and wipe out all life. We’ll find out sooner or later as UPI reports a groundhog got trapped inside such a machine at Meadows Family Fun Mini Golf in Duncansville on Tuesday and indeed saw his reflection inside of it. A state game warden (like animals game, not arcade games) responded and freed the rodent, setting him loose in the wild.

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Harris 44 – Trump 41 among likely voters in Arizona: Local pollster

“In the race for President, the survey revealed that Harris is starting with a slim lead – earning 44.4 percent of the vote compared to 41.6 percent of likely voters casting their support for Trump. The 2.8 point lead is within the survey’s margin of error. Harris’ lead is bolstered by 86.5 percent of the Democratic base, whereas Trump is earning 79.5 percent of the Republican base, a slippage that was also witnessed by other MAGA candidates in Arizona in 2022. Essential independent and unaffiliated voters are also initially breaking by about 7.2 points for Harris,” says a poll release from Highground, a consultancy run by Arizona Republican strategist Chuck Coughlin.

The same survey also found Dem Congressman Ruben Gallego leading psychopath Kari Lake by a wider 49.6 percent to 38.6 percent in the race to take over assclown Senator Kyrsten Sinema’s seat.

Looking back at what seems to be their final poll from 2022, they put Katie Hobbs ahead of Lake 45.8 to 44.8 percent, the margin of Hobbs’s win ended up being 0.67 percent. In the Senate race they had Mark Kelly leading reptilian creep Blake Masters 42.4 to 39.6 percent, Kelly ended up winning by just under 5 percent. So Coughlin’s crew got pretty close on the winner and margins last time around, which is helpul if you’re inclined to credit this poll as sacred prophecy of future victory.

If not you can go with fat Donald’s preferred pollster. “RASMUSSEN POLL, JUST OUT: TRUMP UP BIG OVER KAMALA!” he just posted on Truth Social. We sure he’s up big in that one.

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Ken Paxton announces major new busywork against ActBlue

“In December 2023, Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton opened an investigation into the major fundraising platform ActBlue to determine whether ActBlue’s operations are compliant with all applicable laws. ActBlue has been the subject of numerous allegations of illicit activity, including that its platform may enable fraud. One major focus of Texas’s investigation is ActBlue’s failure to require that donors provide ‘CVV’ codes when making donations by credit card on the ActBlue platform.”

“‘CVV’ codes are a commonly required security measure. Today, the OAG issued a supplemental civil investigative demand to obtain additional information relevant to the latest allegations regarding ActBlue,” says Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton in a statement.

Lol. MAGA world has been sore at ActBlue the last few weeks after Vice President Harris raised $94 million on the first day of her campaign, with the fanboys claiming it’s a Chinese money laundering operation and all sorts of other bullshit, so here comes Pax to make it look like asking questions about the alleged lack of a CVV requirement is moving the ball down the field against the Dems.

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MAGA Land confident Taylor Swift brought this upon herself

“Funny the Politics she supports are the very ones that keep these terrorists alive. You can’t make this stuff up!!” – Top comment on the Breitbart article “Taylor Swift Cancels Several Concerts After ISIS Terror Plot Thwarted,” posted Thursday. The second most-upvoted comment did a slightly better job at making the same point, “Hey Swiftie this is what you championed! Inclusiveness! Ain’t it grand!” except the dumbass used an exclamation point instead of a question mark at the end.

The politics these guys support does not acknowledge the existence of ISIS since Trump defeated them years ago, nor would it countenance well with NBC’s reporting that US intel helped thwart the attack on the concert that was canceled out of precaution rather than turning into a bloodbath like the Jason Aldean show on the Las Vegas Strip did back in 2017, while Trump was president.

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JR Majewski makes yet another comeback in politics

We’re of the mind that this ought to be the end of any more time spent addressing attacks on Tim Walz’s military record. The worst, and really only, time he came close to misrepresenting it was one word in one sentence “Those weapons of war that I carried in war” while talking about the need for better gun laws, emphasis ours, which by itself does make it sound like he said he fought on a battlefield. He does not seem to have implied anywhere else otherwise, unlike Texas MAGA Congressman Troy Nehls, who was ordered to stop wearing a combat veteran pin on June 26th.

The accusation that Walz abandoned his unit right as they shipped out to Iraq? Walz retired two months before they got their deployment notice. It wasn’t due to “bone spurs.” That he got demoted from Sergeant Major? Retired before he could fulfill the three year requirement in order to retain the title. Ronny Jackson got demoted for different reasons. Harris-Walz could use some guys who Walz served with to work the media as surrogates, but one single word said one time is all they’ve got.

And “BASED” guy JR Majewski, they have him too. JD Vance never saw combat either, he churned out press releases from an office, but at least he went to Iraq. The same can’t be said about the QAnon freak Majewski, whose false claims of serving in Afghanistan and in the special forces blew up his first campaign in 2022 and STILL Vance was defending the sick fuck from the “dishonest smears” last year as Majewski was mounting a comeback that eventually imploded as well.

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Trump to walk back on skipping out of ABC debate: report

Sources tell the Washington Post that convicted felon former President Trump is expected to agree once again to debate Vice President Kamala Harris on ABC News on September 10th, less than a week after he demanded it be moved to Fox News in front of a live audience and lied that some made-up conflict of interest over a defamation lawsuit against ABC prohibited the debate.

“Now, Trump is likely to return to ABC News or propose a debate on NBC News with Univision, according to people close to him who spoke on the condition of anonymity to describe private deliberations. These people expect his proposal in the coming days and potentially as early as Thursday afternoon. Both networks are interested in the debate, along with others, the people familiar with the matter said. Trump has discussed both networks with advisers,” the Post writes.

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Five really injured in simulated drunk driving golf cart accident

Four adults and a juvenile were really injured in Wildwood, New Jersey when a speed-governed golf cart rigged to simulate the experience of drunk driving got a little too real and veered off its course in a police-run safety exhibit at a local fair, the Cherry Hill Courier-Post reports.

The golf cart has apparently had an otherwise perfect 20 year safety record at making drivers feel like they’re shitfaced behind the wheel. Three of the injured were discharged from a nearby hospital after treatment of unspecified wounds. Other details were unclear, like exactly how the simulation works and if the driver has to wear some kind of goggles to make their vision blurrier.

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“THEY REFUSE TO MENTION CROWD SIZE”

Convicted felon former President Trump continued decompensating Thursday morning, posting “If Kamala has 1,000 people at a Rally, the Press goes ‘crazy,’ and talks about how ‘big’ it was – And she pays for her ‘Crowd.’ When I have a Rally, and 100,000 people show up, the Fake News doesn’t talk about it, THEY REFUSE TO MENTION CROWD SIZE. The Fake News is the Enemy of the People!”

So we’re at the point of straight up accusing Harris of paying fans to attend rallies. Wonder what his handlers are going to do to get him to calm down before the press conference. Four hours to go.

Earlier the fat bastard posted “We are living in a Pro Criminal Atmosphere. It will end on November 5th,” and yeah that’s one of those things that libs are going to say he’s right about.

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Utah execution goes smoothly

As promised to his lawyers by Utah Gov Spencer Cox, the lethal injection death of convicted murderer Taberon Honie went off without a hitch in the early hours of Thursday, with Honie expiring on the gurney at about 12:20 AM local time after two doses of pentobarbitol, Fox 13 reports.

Honie’s lawyers had been concerned that, given this was the first execution carried out in the Beehive State since 2010, that the crew at Utah State Correctional Facility in Salt Lake City might be a little rusty and subject Honie to needless suffering with a botched cocktail. It would seem those fears were unfounded as the 47 year-old inmate – whose last meal of a burger, fries, and milkshake were a fine, if uninspired, choice – has apparently been killed by the state in a safe and effective manner, with all lawsuits or internal board inquiries or other such headaches preempted.

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Fox News reports there’s a way Emhoff’s affair could help Trump

As we’ve said repeatedly, we’re really trying to be circumspect here, not counting chickens before they hatch, managing expectations, staying positive but sober and realistic, so on and so forth.

That’s getting increasingly difficult every day of constantly seeing this kind of shit, even accounting for the fact that Fox News’s web operation is a cheap content mill constantly firing on all cylinders to print out complete garbage, no doubt some of an AI recomposing other sites’ articles.

This isn’t one of them. Fox News actually contacted “PR maven Juda Engelmayer,” for an “expert opinion” to use to slap together this piece of wishcasting with the terribly worded headline.

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Orange Felon announces desperate bid to regain media attention

Plainly frustrated over the media focus on Vice President Kamala Harris and his own running mate JD Vance’s feckless efforts to differentiate himself by constantly getting in front of cameras to lousy performances over the last few days, convicted felon former President Trump on Thursday announced in a Truth Social post he would be holding a 2 PM press conference at Mar-a-Lago.

Hard to see that going especially well for him, unless it’s restricted to “reporters” from Fox News, Newsmax, RSBN, et cetera, which it very well could be. Even then he could still do damage.

Before that he posted “Kamala refuses to do interviews because her team realizes she is unable to answer questions, much like Biden was not able to answer questions, but for different reasons. He is just plain ‘shot,’ and she is just plain ‘Incompetent.’ [blah blah blah, same bullshit as usual] If she is Elected, our County, and indeed the World, will suffer a 1929 Style Great Depression. It will be the Worst in history and AMERICA WILL BE DESTROYED!” Notice how nobody outside the MAGAverse have been really bitching about Harris not doing a press conference since her campaign launch.

Then later the fat bastard posted “I will expose Kamala during the Debate the same way I exposed Crooked Joe, Hillary, and everyone else during Debates – Only I think Kamala will be easier!” Of course he was non-specific about which debate he thinks is happening and this is not certain to mean that he will in fact show up to the one scheduled for September 10th on ABC News.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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