Category: Uncategorized

FBI officials on Tuesday further confirmed the very MAGA politics of would-be Trump assassin Thomas Crooks, telling the Senate they found an unspecified social media account in which Crooks had posted shit that appeared to “reflect anti-Semitic and anti-immigration themes,” Politico’s Kyle Cheney reports on exactly the information we’d been waiting for about that sick bastard.

“Today, Missouri Attorney General Andrew Bailey obtained a court order forcing the Biden Administration to use congressionally appropriated funds to construct a barrier along the southern border. ‘The Biden Administration has failed to abide by the law to finish the construction of a wall along the southwest border,’ said Attorney General Bailey. ‘Joe Biden refuses to carry out his constitutionally mandated responsibilities, so we took him to court to force him to do his job. This is a huge step forward in the fight to secure our border at a key moment in our nation’s history.'”

“In FY 2020, Congress passed a law explicitly requiring the President to construct barrier systems at the southern border to keep unauthorized individuals out of our country. The law provided $1.4 billion to build the border wall and explicitly stated the money ‘shall only be available for construction of barrier systems along the southwest border.’ The Biden Administration refused to comply with Congress’ command. When asked why the Biden Administration ‘did not build a barrier, such as a wall, to keep migrants out,’ it replied that ‘[i]t is not the policy of this administration’ because ‘[w]e do not agree with the building of a wall.’ DHS expressed its intention to ‘end wall expansion.’ The Administration even ‘call[ed] on Congress to cancel remaining border wall funding’ because they knew that without congressional action, they would need to use the appropriated funds for their specified purpose: finish the construction of President Trump’s border wall.”

“Yet when Congress did not capitulate to its demands, the Biden Administration ignored its constitutional obligations to abide by Congress’ appropriations laws and opted not to use the funding for the purpose Congress directed,” says Missouri AG Andrew Bailey in a statement.

Seems a little “sus,” as the zoomers used to say before the olds appropriated it. Think we’ll wait on some reliable reporting to explain what actually happened and the practical implcations.

“Facebook has just admitted that it wrongly censored the Trump ‘attempted assassination photo,’ and got caught. Same thing for Google. They made it virtually impossible to find pictures or anything about this heinous act. Both are facing BIG BACKLASH OVER CENSORSHIP CLAIMS. Here we go again, another attempt at RIGGING THE ELECTION!!! GO AFTER META AND GOOGLE. LET THEM KNOW WE ARE ALL WISE TO THEM, WILL BE MUCH TOUGHER THIS TIME,” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Tuesday, admitting that he was too lazy and impotent to successfully “go after” the tech giants in his failed term and losing his shit over his deification being throttled mistakenly by Facebook’s algorithm that (probably) removes pics of blood and violence.

The fat fuck also late Monday shared a meme of FBI Director Christoper Wray saying “WHAT DID YOU KNOW AND WHEN DID YOU KNOW ABOUT IT? RETRUTH IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHO ORDERED THE ASSASSINATION OF DONALD J TRUMP.” Which seems to indicate that Trump is, at the very least, entertaining the idea the FBI was in on the failed attempt on his life.

A review by CNN’s KFile finds eyeliner-wearing Mike Pence replacement JD Vance’s Ohio Senate primary campaign fundraising emails displaying a full-on obsession with “childless cat ladies,” with one in 2021 reading “Did you see me on FOX Primetime recently? I needed to speak DIRECTLY to patriots like you about the serious issue of radical childless leaders in this country. We can’t have people who don’t have a direct stake in this country making our most important decisions.”

“We’ve allowed ourselves to be dominated by childless sociopaths – they’re invested in NOTHING because they’re not invested in this country’s children. Fighting back won’t be easy – our childless opponents have a lot of free time. That’s why I need YOU to stand with me,” the message continued.

Another one reads, emphasis JD’s, “Our country is basically run by childless Democrats who are miserable in their own lives and want to make the rest of the country miserable too… What I want to know is: why have we turned our country over to people who don’t have a direct stake in it?”

And yeah, you already knew this guy’s a fucking freak… And a complete worm considering he backed out of supporting a bill that would obviously help incentivize reproduction.

“A large tropical wave centered several hundred miles east of the Lesser Antilles is producing limited shower activity due to environmental dry air. Conditions are forecast to become a little more conducive for development over the warmer waters of the southwestern Atlantic Ocean, and a tropical depression could form late this week while the system is in the vicinity of the Greater Antilles or the Bahamas. Interests in the Greater Antilles, the Bahamas, and the southeastern US should monitor the progress of this system,” says the National Hurricane Center in a bulletin putting the probability of the wave developing into a named storm at 60 percent over the next seven days.

The tropical storm – or hurricane – would be called “Debby,” as “she” is the next name on the list.

Ugh… Can’t they just make a list from what people are actually naming their kids and not like some dumpy, Virginia Slims menthol-smoking bar hag 30 years past her “prime” is named? Same with “Marsha” or “Tammy” or… ooof, “Trish.” And lest you think we’re being somehow misogynistic here, we’re of the same mind about the next name on the list, “Ernesto.” It just sounds like some really flamboyant, fun Latino guy who’s good at dancing and always the life of the party. What if it hits Fire Island? Will the real-life Ernestos be welcome there anymore? Similarly who the fuck wants their dying thought to be “I wished I had heeded the evacuation warnings about Hurricane Dexter, now my family and I are going to drown in this massive storm surge because I didn’t take the name so seriously”? Or if instead of “Dexter” it was “Herman” or “Dillon” or “Barry” or “Herbert.”

We’re not advocating for them to switch to calling them “Argos” or “Cthulhu” or “Odin” or “Poseidon” or “Valkyrie” or – well we’re not advocating against it either. We’ll be perfectly fine with it if they just stick to normal names unweighted by association with a “type” of douchey or unlikeable person.

Vice President Kamala Harris’s campaign on Tuesday rolled out a $50 million, three-week ad blitz with the first TV spot of her presidential bid, titled “Fearless,” ABC News reports.

The push comes as Politico Playbook on Tuesday led their morning newsletter with free earned media to convicted felon former President Trump’s campaign to end American democracy with “The DONALD TRUMP attack-ad onslaught begins today. After being knocked off-kilter for a week by President JOE BIDEN’s decision to end his re-election bid and the Democratic Party’s quick embrace of Harris, the former president’s campaign is ready to try and knock his new opponent down a few pegs. The Trump campaign’s first $12 million ad flight targeting Harris goes live in six swing states this morning, and it’s all about the border – tagging the VP as ‘failed, weak, dangerously liberal.'”

So back to horserace circlejerking and water-carrying for fascism for insider-y Beltway media.

“The Justice Department announced today that it will monitor compliance with federal voting rights laws in Maricopa County, Arizona, for the July 30 primary election. The Justice Department enforces the federal voting rights laws that protect the rights of all citizens to access the ballot. The department regularly deploys its staff to monitor for compliance with federal civil rights laws in elections in communities all across the country. In addition, the division also deploys federal observers from the Office of Personnel Management, where authorized by federal court order.”

“The Civil Rights Division’s Voting Section, working with US Attorneys’ Offices, enforces the civil provisions of federal statutes that protect the right to vote, including the Voting Rights Act, National Voter Registration Act, Help America Vote Act, Civil Rights Act and Uniformed and Overseas Citizens Absentee Voting Act,” says a Justice Department press release posted on Monday.

Why they would need to have wingtips on the ground on a primary day is not clear. Arizona is more or less America’s election denial capital (if only by a hair over Georgia and Michigan) but Kari Lake’s pretty much a lock for the Senate nomination. Maybe this is simply the DOJ’s dry run for monitoring in November, when the MAGA freaks will be “monitoring” the polls themselves en masse?

Monday night’s “White Dudes for Harris” online event, which might have cost like $900 to produce, if that, drew more than 200,000 viewers and raised over $4 million, Politico reports.

In related news, free speech crusader Elon Musk for some reason perman-banned @dudes4harris from Twitter just hours before the successful event. Zero explanation was given for the canceling.

Leonard Leo warns Biden-Harris efforts to radically overhaul Supreme Court could 'backfire' https://t.co/Qnq2AKyWFL

— Fox News (@FoxNews) July 30, 2024

Forget the whole “I was a stranger and you welcomed me” from the Bible, Republican Texas Greg Abbott and his posse of Republican thugs have targeted a Catholic organization that runs shelters and soup kitchens frequently used by undocumented migrants, CBS News reports.

Spearheaded by cockeyed Republican Attorney General Ken Paxton, the harassment against the Annunciation House accuses the group of  “illegal alien harboring and operation of a stash house,” when in fact, the organization frequently works with immigration authorities to help ease overcrowding at nearby facilities.

Founded in 1978, Annunciation House runs at least three facilities to help feed, house and care for migrants.  In 2022, one of its facilities that could accommodate 1,500 migrants was forced to shut down.

After a jury found his mismanagement and malfeasance cost the organization more than $5 million, Wayne LaPierre will not be allowed to work with the National Rifle Association for the next ten years, a New York state Supreme Court judge ruled, NBC News reports.

In February, a jury found LaPierre liable for diverting millions of NRA dollars to pay for his personal expenses from house expenses to luxury vacations, and he was ordered to repay $4 million on top of around a million dollars he had already repaid.  New York Attorney General Letitia James sought to have LaPierre banned from non-profit leadership permanently, but the judge ruled a ten-year ban for the 74-year-old was sufficient.

The decision removed LaPierre from the NRA’s leadership for the first time since 1977.  “As a result of this case, Wayne LaPierre will be banned from the NRA for 10 years for spearheading this fraud, and the court called for additional proposed reforms to the NRA. After years of corruption, the NRA and its senior leaders are finally being held accountable,” James said in a statement.

A registered Republican Florida man is lucky to only be facing an animal cruelty charge after tossing a dog at an Aventura cop who responded to an altercation at a park, CBS Miami reports.

Mordechai Oaknin, 66, was in the middle of a dispute of an unspecified nature in a local dog park when at least one officer showed up to intervene… And yeah he threw the dog. This article’s actually going to end up being longer than the upstream source. There was nothing else to it.

It’s also kind of boring by Florida standards, right? Like last year we had not one but two indecent exposure suspects who claimed to be suffering from zipper malfunctions. There was the parrot pirate. The lady who drunkenly drove a golf cart naked through the scene of a six hour shootout between cops and a guy firing at them from the roof. The other lady high on bath salts who was named “Snape” but called herself “Harry Potter.” Shit, we even have a more entertaining story about a Florida man throwing a live animal. Then the “Booty Patrol” truck. The SovCit’s truck with the self-printed license plate that said “DO NOT DETAIN” because he was protected under the “GLOBAL POSTAL UNION TREATY.” The jackass who robbed a Burger King for food and was arrested while hiding in the men’s room to eat it. The two women arrested for sticking up a Taco Bell for food. The Villager who smashed himself on the head with a plate to make it look like his ex-wife – that he was still living with – had started the fight. The cop arrested for DUI in uniform, in his patrol car…

Holy shit we could be here all night underscoring why Oaknin’s such a goddamn amateur Floridian.

Democratic North Carolina Governor Roy Cooper announced that he was withdrawing his name from consideration for the vice presidential slot on the Party’s ticket, CBS News reports.  A longshot consideration, Cooper would have helped to placate the underlying misogyny and racism of some moderates who would not consider a mixed-race woman for the highest office in government.

“I strongly support Vice President Harris’ campaign for President.  I know she is going to win and I was honored to be considered for this role,” Cooper released in a statement.  “This just wasn’t the right time for North Carolina and for me to potentially be on a national ticket. As I’ve said from the beginning, she has an outstanding list of people from which to choose, and we’ll all work to make sure she wins.”

Harris is likely to name her VP within the next ten days, prior to the start of the Democratic National Convention on August 19th.  Among the widely discussed names:  Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro, Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear, and Arizona Senator Mark Kelly.

Stitched together what we could out of this mess of an interview that Frau Ignraham’s team worked extra hard to come up with something that viewers could sit through. From Trump weirdly commenting on Kamala Harris’s age, to him saying JD Vance’s “childless cat ladies” comment simply means Vance loves families, hinting that Harris is hiding her laugh, assuring viewers he’ll leave office in 2029 even though he resisted in 2021, and all sorts of other shit, there’s something for every kind of MAGA voter who wants to pretend the fat fuck is mentally stable and capable of governing.

Agencies in the US intelligence community said Russia and Iran continue to try to influence American elections, with Russia working to defeat pro-Ukraine candidates and boost Trump and his allies, while Iran is firmly trying to defeat MAGA, the Washington Post reports.

Iran looks at a potential second Trump term as a further step back in its efforts to improve its economics and international standing, with Trump vowing to further undermine Western efforts to negotiate a halt to Iran’s nuclear weapons program.  Russia hopes to get Republicans who will cut funding for Ukraine’s defense into office, as well as return Putin’s puppet to the Oval Office.

Eyeliner-wearing Ohio Senator and Mike Pence replacement JD Vance on Saturday privately told GOP donors in Minnesota that President Joe Biden dropping out of the 2024 race and being replaced with Kamala Harris was a “sucker punch” to their campaign, the Washington Post reports.

“All of us were hit with a little bit of a political sucker punch. The bad news is that Kamala Harris does not have the same baggage as Joe Biden, because whatever we might have to say, Kamala is a lot younger. And Kamala Harris is obviously not struggling in the same ways that Joe Biden did,” said Vance on an audio recording of him admitting weakness to donors obtained by the Post.

“We have a very unique opportunity, but also a very unique challenge, because, let’s be honest, 10 days ago, the two candidates who were running for president, everybody had an opinion about them,” the doplin-loving couch fucker continued. “Love ’em or hate ’em, everybody has an opinion about Trump and Biden after the past eight years. But Kamala Harris, people don’t really know.”

In related news, Mother Jones unearthed video of Vance – the old, normal-ish JD Vance – in 2017 telling an interviewer the obvious about the MAGA voter base he’s now appealing to: “Some people who voted for Trump were racists, and they voted for him for racist reasons,” but mostly blaming Steve Bannon, rather than Trump himself, for making the 2016 election “hyper-racialized.”

British astrophysics egghead Dave Clements earlier this month delivered a Venus-shattering presentation on recent indications of two compounds, phosphine and ammonia, are present in the atmosphere of Earth’s hellish neighbor, both of which could be signs of life, CNN reports.

“We had three observation campaigns and in just one run, we got 140 times as much data as we did in the original detection. And what we’ve got so far indicates that we once again have phosphine detections,” said Clements to the July 17 Royal Astronomical Society meeting in Hull, England.

Clements, whose team got the data from a new instrument adapted to the James Clerk Maxwell Telescope in Hawaii, said the ammonia “is arguably more significant than the discovery of phosphine. We’re a long way from saying this, but if there is life on Venus producing phosphine, we have no idea why it’s producing it. However, if there is life on Venus producing ammonia, we do have an idea why it might be wanting to breathe ammonia. By all normal expectations, [neither compund should] be there. Phosphine and ammonia have both been suggested as biomarkers, including on exoplanets. So finding them in the atmosphere of Venus is interesting on that basis as well.”

We’re excited for everyone to pretend to be excited over some boring microbial extremophiles on Venus being mankind’s first discovery of extraterrestrial life and for some dickhead to say on television that it “completely changes our understanding of the universe,” but at least that news cycle would be over quickly. More concerning would be is if they were aerial jellyfish-like blobs that float around aimlessly in the thicker parts of the upper atmosphere. That would be so goddamned annoying to watch science pretend that they’re deeply fascinating and worthy of attention.

Hey white dudes who support Vice President Kamala Harris’s presidential campaign, did you hear about the big “White Dudes for Harris Kickoff Call” that’s starting in about two hours? No?

Well what the fuck is wrong with you? Sign up and then click on the Zoom link when it starts. Don’t worry about actually participating, just sign in and mute it if you want. Drive up the numbers artificially among convicted felon former President Trump’s main demographic… except if you live in a swing state. Then you should really focus and pay attention to everything they’re saying about volunteering and talking to other white dudes who might be “open to persuasion.”

“OPEC NATIONS ARE GOING ALL OUT TO DRIVE DOWN OIL PRICES IN THE HOPE THAT CRAZY KAMALA HARRIS WILL WIN. THEN THEY WILL REALLY REAP THE REWARDS! SHE WILL BE A DISASTER FOR THE USA!” posted convicted felon former President Trump on Monday, plainly demanding the Saudis and the rest do something immediately to raise gas prices on Americans.

See, this is legitimate panic. A calmer, more collected Trump would make up some bullshit way to take credit for it, saying that the cartel is lowering prices preemptively in anticipation of him winning because he would be so tough on them or some other vague lie. If he can’t do that then maybe he should just leave it alone instead of unintentionally screaming that he wants gas prices to be higher.

Earlier the fat bastard posted “Why is FoxNews putting on Crazy Kamala Harris Rallies? Why do they allow the perverts at the failed and disgraced Lincoln Project to advertise on FoxNews? Even Mr Kellyanne Conway, a man so badly hurt and humiliated by his wife (she must have done some really NASTY things to him, because he is CRAZY!), is advertising on FoxNews. We have to WIN WITHOUT FOX!” Maybe he should spend more time campaigning and less time watching Fox News.

President Joe Biden will speak at the Lyndon B Johnson Presidential Library in Texas on Monday to sell his messaging for bringing accountability to the unaccountable shitbags who call themselves public servants and jurists sitting on the bench of the Supreme Court of the United States.