“Bracket busting season is upon us, but Domino’s Pizza Inc is dropping a deal worthy of a championship run. From now through the final basketball game on April 6, customers can enjoy Domino’s ‘Best Deal Ever’ promotion: any pizza with any toppings for just $9.99 each.”

“‘The games are almost here, and we knew we had to give basketball fans the MVP of all deals to enjoy as they watch the tournament with their friends and family,’ said Kate Trumbull, Domino’s executive vice president – chief marketing officer. ‘We created the Best Deal Ever to give customers the pizza they crave the most, when they crave it the most, at a craveable price. Basketball watch parties and pizza go hand in hand, so whether your bracket is thriving, busted or hanging on by a thread, at least your pizza game can be unbeatable with Domino’s Best Deal Ever,'” says Domino’s in a press release headlined “Domino’s® Brings Back Its Best Deal Ever for the Big Tournament.”

It’s the first-ever confirmed sighting of “Big Tournament” because Papa John’s or Pizza Hut or whoever else got the “March Madness” sponsorship first. An important landmark in the evolution of corporate weaseldom that for decades brought you the time-honored “Big Game” for brands whose competitors got the coveted Official Super Bowl® Sponsor partnership – or maybe didn’t want to pay the NFL to become, say, the official spermicidal lubricated condom of the Super Bowl.

Or the NFL wasn’t taking bids for an official spermicidal lubricated condom of the Super Bowl but would sue the condom company if they did use the Super Bo- ANYWAY, fast food pizza is germane enough to sitting on the couch watching sportsball so there’s a world in which Domino’s pays the NCAA the fees and advertises themselves as the official March Madness 2026 pizza sponsor.

We’re not in that world. Instead we’re in this one where Domino’s use of “Big Tournament” sticks out like a boner in basketball shorts. That, after what was estimably some medium-intensive focus-grouping by their team, they decided this was the least bad option as opposed to “College Basketball Playoffs” or “Bracket Madness,” or becoming the official NIT pizza delivery partner.

Dominos’ reputation for sub-mediocrity is already bad enough. Why associate with more of it?